A/N: Hi sorry that it's taken me so long to update this story. I'm really sorry and I'm excited (sad for you) that I'm going to be finishing the story soon. I've decided that there are only 4 more chapters left but I'm not going to do a half-ass job on these chapters.

If you haven't noticed, I've updated the first 5 or 9 (I lost count) chapters. I decided that they were poorly written and I could have done a better job- so go back and read the first few chapters that I've updated. Once again I'm sorry for the super long delay but here's chapter 34! I'm breaking it into two parts because I'm a terrible person. ;) So I hope you comment on this! I want at LEAST 3 or 4 comments for me to post the next half of the chapter! Enjoy!

Dear Diary,

It's Christmas and Draco and I decided to stay at the castle for break. I didn't tell anyone but Raven- who is still mad at me… But she's staying too. I'm so excited because Draco told me that we were going to dinner tonight (Christmas Eve) and after, he's going to show my something. I really can't wait any longer- I want tonight to come more that anyone knows.

I haven't seen Draco for two days and I already miss his presence… For some reason, whenever I'm with him I just feel so much happier- so much more alive. Like I can feel myself growing and breathing and using my organs (wow that sounds kinda creepy). I can always hear my heart when I'm with him and I just feel like I can fly.

What kills me, though, is that we can never tell anyone that we're together. It's deemed "improper" for us to be together but something about Draco constantly pulls me to him. Maybe it's the face that we're so alike but so different. I mean- he grew up surrounded my riches and servants and I grew up separated from my family, with nothing but myself for company. He has money- I live in dirt. But we're so alike. We both are strong, athletic, smart, not to mention that we're both abuse victims. There. I said it. I'm an abuse victim and I cut. Blah I sound like I'm in therapy or something.

But with me, what you see is what you get. I've seen this side of me. I look depressed, sad, unhappy, weak- and I am. But with Draco, you see a strong, handsome man but underneath he hurts and cries. His cuts run as deep as mine. But even if his façade is tough and arrogant, he hurts and it reflects on his arms. He yells, cries, laughs- he feels which is more that you can say for me… I go between numb, depressed, and almost dead. Bu with Draco I feel emotions I haven't felt for years. I feel happy, giddy, excited.

I need to go eat breakfast and get washed up so I can look good. And I have to finish my homework but that isn't as important. Well I'll write how it went- if I haven't forgotten!

So this is farewell, Diary.

Love,

Ginny.

With a light thud, the deep red diary shut in pale hands. Ginny whipped back the curtains, after making sure her diary was tucked between the bed frame and the mattress, and squinted as she saw that the sun was beating down brightly. The snow made it ten times brighter and it seared itself into her eyes. As her feet touched the floor, she yawned and stretched and got out of bed. Only a few minutes later she was dressed in her warm sweats and her hand knit sweater that still fit her after all this time.

***FLASHBACK***

"Molly! Hurry up with the food! Don't make me come into that kitchen!" Arthur roared from the living room. His fat ass sat in his reclining chair as hit feet were propped up on the mantle in front of the fire. All the boys and Hermione crowded in a little circle, some sitting on the floor while others sat on chairs and sofas. Ginny was behind the sofa sitting curled up after being slapped by her father in front of the whole family for opening her gift before everyone else had finished. Arthur had taken her new pair of shoes and thrown them into the fire. Ginny could only watch and refrain from crying.

Ron and Percy glanced at each other with dark, menacing eyes and nodded in approval. However, only a few seconds later, trays of food flew through the kitchen door and arranged themselves on the dining room table. Molly came through the door holding a huge, golden-brown, perfectly cooked goose with a fake, bright smile plastered on her face.

"Dinner," she said, motioning to the table and bowing a bit, "is served." All the men (and Hermione) leapt up and rushed to gather around the table. The sound of scratching chairs and the clink of silverware resounded through the little room and it made hard for Ginny to hear her mother call her into the kitchen.

"You hungry love?" She asked with a soft look. Ginny nodded and hugged her mother. Molly laughed and led her to a little table that had a lit candle and trays of food floating around it. They sat down and started devouring the smaller portions saved for them. They ate, talked, and laughed until a bell rang from the other room.

Molly quickly stood and ran out of the kitchen. Or a few seconds all you could here were some orders and then Molly said something. Laughter erupted and suddenly a crash was heard followed by yelling and then another crash. When everything seemed to have been okay, Molly came hurtling through the door into the sink, thrown by a strong force.

Molly landed by the sink and quickly looked up at Ginny. Her face was swollen, lip broken, nose bleeding, but her eyes held strength and determination. But behind the strength Ginny could plainly see fear.

"Run," she commanded Ginny quietly, "run and hide." Ginny didn't need to be told twice. She ran to the cupboard that was in the far corner of the room and shut the door. However, because she was inside- it didn't shut all the way and she could watch through a small crack. However, she wished she hadn't

"Bitch! How dare you defile me in front of my own family! How dare you try to laugh at me- even worse- try and get everybody to side with you and laugh at me? ME?" Molly didn't even cower. Even being smacked across the face after every sentence, she still stood tall.

"Your temper overpowers you. It's called a joke," she said, punctuating the last word. Arthur looked as if he was ready to kill. Unbeknown to Ginny, he really was ready to kill.

"You do not have the right to laugh at me! Stupid itch- you will NEVER speak to me like that again!" Arthur's hands were still beating Molly's still form until they moved up to her throat and stopped- squeezing with all of his force. Molly still didn't struggle. She stayed calm- almost as if this had happened multiple times before.

Arthur's eyes were wild as he spoke, "You think I won't do it? You think I'll let you go this time? You think I'm a coward?" He asked, slowly increasing pressure on Molly's throat. Molly just laughed- determination in her eyes.

"You've done this too many times. I'm tired of you. Either let me go or finish me off," she said thoughtfully. Ginny gasped quietly to herself. Her mother wanted out? She continued watching as Arthur stopped. His hands weren't as strained and his eyes seemed to calm.

Confusion crossed his face for a second and then his eyes grew black. Something in his mind snapped as he yelled, "NO! ENOUGH!" His hands clenched her throat as his grip increased tenfold. Molly choked and her eyes bugged out of her reddening face. She struggled at his grip but it only increased. Failed attempts to breath pushed more air out of her lungs, causing her to emit a strangled choke. Finally, Molly's eyes rolled back into her head and she became still.

Tears were freely falling from Ginny's face as she watched the violent murder through the cupboard door. She muffled her sobs by biting down on her arm, drawing some blood. Her eyes- her fragile mind couldn't handle watching the torture so she looked away at the end. Once her eyes left the door, she heard the thud as her mother's body hit the ground. Ginny sobbed harder as she heard footsteps walking towards the door.

Her father never found out she was hiding in the cupboard. However, Ginny was scarred for life after that night. Her heart turned cold and she put a wall up around it as the last person she loved was taken by her father. She promised that she would never get as close to anyone again so that her father could never take them from her.

***END FLASHBACK***

Ginny had never celebrated Christmas after that day. 'Maybe this year will be different- I finally have someone to celebrate it with!' She thought. A slight smile crossed her face at the thought of Draco whom she was going to see in a few hours. He had told her that he'd planned something special for her and she was dying to find out. Knots entangled themselves in her stomach as she anticipated what it might be.

The day passed in a blur in which Ginny barely participated. Through homework and meals, Ginny had lost track of time and when her watched chimed that it was 3 o'clock, her eyes widened in surprise. She ran to her dorm and stripped to nothing but a towel and hopped in the shower. She quickly washed her hair, conditioned it, and scrubbed her face and body. When she got out, she said a quick drying spell and then magically removed the hair from her legs and arms, leaving them completely smooth.

After rummaging through her closet, Ginny had two possible outfits that she could wear on her date. She only had 2 hours left until Draco would be left waiting for her. On her bed were two articles of clothing: a pair of jeans and a dress. She didn't know if she wanted to wear her dark blue skinny jeans with her cute gray and black sweater that was in her closet or her deep green dress.

As Raven passed by Ginny's room she heard a heavy sigh— a clothing-decision-making sigh. She backed up two steps and peered into the dorm where she saw a confused Ginny standing at the edge of her bed.

"What's the occasion?" She asked with a hint of distaste. Raven still wasn't speaking to Ginny other than an occasional "Hello." Sure, she might have been PMSing when she snapped at Ginny but she had meant it. Ginny had been, unknowingly, blowing her off to constantly be with Draco. This left Raven alone. She, in turn, started hanging out with Blaise more, learning a lot about him in the past two weeks.

Blaise was from a rich family like Raven's and it turned out that they knew each other from a long time ago when they were neighbors. When neither was hanging out with their friends (Blaise with Draco and Raven with Ginny) the two would take walks together, study together, and eat together. Raven now had another friend she could be with so that when Ginny blew her off for Draco, she knew that Draco was blowing off Blaise and that made them both lonely. So they found comfort in each other's loneliness.

Ginny wheeled around at the sound of Ravens voice and stared. Raven leaned against the doorframe with her legs and arms crossed over each other. Maybe she was alright again. It had been about two weeks since she'd last spoken to Ginny so it was kind of a big deal.

"Just a dinner date with Draco…" Ginny trailed off as Raven peered past her at her bed. Her eyes scanned the clothes that were displayed on her bed.

"It's snowing. You'd be a fool to go outside with a dress on. You'll freeze and die. The jeans are hot and will go great with…" She walked over to Ginny's trunk and opened it, browsing through the abundance of clothes. "Aha," she said as she found what she was looking for, "here. This gray and black sweater," she said holding up the sweater that the red-head had been thinking about.

Ginny smiled. Raven still knew her so well.

"Thanks Ray. And come here!" She ran to Raven and tackled her in a bone-crushing hug. About two hours later, Ginny was ready.

"You look gorgeous Gin-Bear. Really a sight for sore eyes," Raven said with her hands on her hips. Ginny stood in front of the full body mirror and took in her beauty. For such a long time, Ginny had been looking dead and desolate- her eyes only sockets and her skin a sickly pale color.

However, tonight her skin was a pretty pale that shone in the proper light. Her hair was a deep, silky red that Raven had curled so perfectly that it flowed down her face and bunched up at her shoulders. Her eyes were outlined in a solid black with a dust of green on her lids. The mascara that was applied to her eyelashes made her eyes stand out the most. Her rosy lips looked a bit more plump than usual, due to the lipstick that she wore. Her cheeks had just a slight blush on them, making her look so alive. The sweater dipped to just above her breasts, and a dragon pendant on a chain drew attention to her chest.

The sweater ended just as her jeans began so whenever she moved, a bit of skin showed- but just a bit. It clung tight to her form, accentuating her skinny waist and causing her breasts to look just a bit larger. Her jeans cupped her ass, making it look so very tempting. She wore tall, wool boots to keep her feet warm and a cute dark gray pea coat on top. She also had a cashmere scarf to wrap around her neck if she got cold.

Turning around once more to assess herself, Ginny jumped up in delight and squeaked. She ran and hugged Raven for helping her and then proceeded to run down to the Entrance Hall, where she was going to meet Draco. When she got to the top of the stairs her heart stopped.

Yeah so I know I'm a terrible person and left you with a cliff hanger. But y'all need to review for me to put up the next chapter. Don't forget to read the newly refurbished chapters that were once bad. :)