Okay so I'm doing this new fic...its a rather angsty one...but its mainly a love story...isnt it always? lol

Oh and the title was the same on another fic I was working on but it didn't seem right, so I changed it to this...

Edward is suicidal, but Bella inadvertantly saves him, their lives both change as they grow closer to each other.

AH AU

M for suicide and lemons :) but tastful lemons...

Disclaimer: I dont own twilight, never have, never will... :)

This was it, this was the end. Cliché I know. My last thoughts that of the end. But honestly what was I supposed to think about. I was driving down the road, rain pelting across the windshield. I was about ten minutes from the bridge. Ten short minutes before I would be submerged. Ten minutes until I left this world behind.

The rain got almost heavier on the windows around me, the silence being broken by the rhythmic pounding. The rain didn't shun away from me, it tried to soak me even though I wasn't worth their moisture. There would be nothing I would be worthy of. My father, my mother, my sister, my brother, I'm not worthy of their love.

Life would be easier for them if I wasn't around, bringing them down. Their elated happiness at their new abode, Forks. High school would start in a few weeks, and I would've been tested, really tested. High school. Maybe I deserved that. To be put through their petty dramas, to be bombarded by the almost headache that make up the populace.

But I wouldn't, because I couldn't survive the fall I was about to make.

I was seriously going to put up with it, to make myself carry on. But it was just too hard. Every breath, every stupid beat of my heart, every thought that ran through my head. It was too hard. And they begged me to end it.

My headlights flashed a road sign, a sign I knew to mean five more minutes.

But they flashed across a person, a small figure standing by the said of the road. I wouldn't have paid much attention but I had to swerve my Volvo to miss hitting them. I slammed the breaks on. My heart was beating erratically, my breathing hard as I clutched onto the steering wheel.

I was going to put my foot back on the accelerator, but the figure I saw in the torrential downpour outside looked distinctively feminine. I looked around at the darkened car, still jumpy from almost hitting her. I squinted out the window. I could see her shadow moving away from the car, she looked like she was carrying something.

Fucking curiosity.

I turned my headlights off and pulled my keys out of the car, yanking the door open and jumping out of the car. It was raining heavier than I thought. My clothes already soaked through and I had been out less than a minute. I saw her still retreating. She was short and hunched over in the rain. What the hell was she doing here? It was abandoned road at half eleven at night. I jogged up to her, pulling my collar up against the rain.

"Hey!" I called out, my voice sounded distant even to my ears. She didn't look around, maybe she didn't hear me, I ran up to her back and touched her shoulder and she jumped, looking up at me. She looked behind me at my car and her eyes widened.

"Oh god I am so sorry," she gasped, I looked down at her, my curiosity at why on earth she was standing on an open road in this weather flaring up again. She looked cold, and she was soaked through. Her hair was dripping down the front of her, a dark brown shade. She bit her lip.

I remembered my car and it clicked,

"No, its okay, it's just..." I paused, looking at this strange girl, I didn't know her, and I was concerned. I was concerned about her. "Do you need a lift?"

What the hell? Did I just ask this stranger if she needed a lift? Her arm was wrapped around a huge duffle bag that was hanging off her shoulder. She went to shake her head, but I raised my eyebrows at her.

"I don't really have anywhere to go." She said quietly, almost too quietly. My chivalrous side was almost as strong as my curiosity. I reached out for her arm and nodded towards my car. She followed me silently.

My whole night shifted. I was no longer headed for the desolate bridge. I was heading home, with the strange girl. I shut the car door behind her and jogged to my side, sitting down and shaking my hair out, it dripped across my face and I squeaked on the chair. I looked over at the girl and she was running her fingers through her own hair. She looked up at me and my eyes met hers. They were the deepest shade of brown I had ever seen, I couldn't pull my eyes away. There were so many emotions swimming in her eyes. She smiled nervously and looked away, that broke me out of my trance.

"Um, I'm Edward," I said stupidly, turning the keys and letting the heat swirl around the car.

"Bella." She introduced herself.

"What are you doing out here?" I asked much easier to just say it outright rather than guess and get it wrong. The silence in the car, save for the rain coming down, was tangible, she was clearly deciding whether or not to tell me, she sighed and looked over at me, our eyes connecting again.

"I left home,"

Her tone ended that part of the conversation, I nodded, wanting to respect her silence and reached behind me to put my seatbelt on. I almost laughed at that gestured. My seatbelt to save my life, when earlier on today all I could think about was dying.

"Where are we going?" she asked timidly,

"I'm taking you to my house, you can stay there." I said simply, she looked back over at me,

"Edward, I don't want to impose, its okay, honestly, I'll just find a motel."

This annoyed me for some reason. The thought of her in a horrible, unsafe motel.

"No, you can stay at my house, trust me, we have the room." I smiled over at her, trying to convince her, she nodded her head hesitantly and reached behind her to pull her seatbelt into place. I was glad she was accepting and I reversed the car. Heading back the way I came.

The car ride was relatively quiet. She fiddled with her zip; I tried to concentrate on my driving. We were both dripping onto the leather, I knew it should have bothered me, but I couldn't find myself to mind.

"so what brings you down this dreary road?" she smiled, still looking at her zip. My hands clutched the steering wheel and I locked my jaw. Thoughts of earlier when I came so close to ending it flew through my brain. I was so close. And this girl had stopped me.

This girl had saved my life.

"I was just out for a drive." I said through my teeth. It came out harsher than I wanted it. She didn't say anything about it; I knew she saw through it, that she knew I had a different agenda. But thankfully we came into my driveway. I looked over at her, and her eyes widened. The rain had slowed down into a drizzle, the house came into full view. I drove the car into the garage and shut the mechanical door behind us. I opened my car door, and went round to open hers but she had already climbed out. I grabbed her bag out of the back seat and pulled it over my shoulder, mush to her dislike.

I smiled at her and walked ahead of her into the house, figuring she would feel more comfortable following than leading.

"Edward!" Esme, rushed over towards me hugging me tightly. "Where did you go? You've been gone for hours."

"Sorry mom," I mumbled, a little embarrassed by Esme's affection. Carlisle came up behind her and pulled her shoulders away from me. "Carlisle, Esme, this is Bella, I wanted to know if it was okay if she stayed here for a while, she doesn't really have anywhere to go." I said formally, I looked back at Bella and she was blushing the most beautiful shade of pink.

"Of course, she can take the spare room on the third floor."

"Where is Alice?" I asked, looking around the living room, finding only Carlisle and Esme standing in front of her.

"She went to bed a few minutes ago," Esme said, looking at Bella.

"Okay, I need to speak to her for a minute and then I'll set the bedroom up for Bella. Goodnight mom, dad." I nodded in their direction and Esme looked at Carlisle, I took no notice of it and walked to the stairs, Bella's wet bag still hanging on my arm, she followed me quietly.

I knocked Alice's bedroom door and she flung it open, throwing her arms around my neck.

"Edward!"

"Okay Alice, could you just..." she nuzzled my neck,

"Don't ever do that to me again, I was so worried." She murmured into my skin. I rubbed her back with my free hand and hugged her.

"I won't Ali, I promise." She released my neck and her eyes fell on Bella, she gasped at her and looked back at me, a million questions in her eyes, I sighed and rolled my eyes. "This is Bella; she will be staying with us for a while,"

Well they needed to be introduced, might as well get it over with. Alice smiled over at her and gave me some sheets and blankets to put on the bed for her, before saying her goodbyes and hugging me again. I led Bella up stairs; I was the only one on the third floor, well not anymore. The room was smaller than mine, but nice enough. The double bed was against the west wall and the small dresser was opposite. That was really it for furniture. No one really used this room; it was here more for convenience.

I put her duffle bag on the dresser and the sheets on the bed. She shuffled behind me. I fanned out the white bed sheet and began making the bed as she stood by the door frame.

"You make beds?" she asked sceptically,

"Um, not really." I answered honestly, her face broke into a smile and she let go of her zip and walked over to me,

"your folding it wrong, it's easier if you do this." she pulled the sheet out where I haphazardly tucked it in at the top, folding it and tucking it in perfectly, like it was an art or something. I moved back and let her carry on. She did the same thing with the under blanket and then pulled the main blanket over it. "see?" she said smoothing down the edge, I just nodded and smiled, kind of confused by the whole show, I mean they were just sheets, but she seemed contented in her work.

I cleared my throat,

"The bathrooms in there, there should be towels and stuff already there, have you got everything you need? Do you need anything else?" I asked politely, she shook her head and downcast her eyes, why did she keep doing that? I felt my brows furrow, but I shook my head and folded my arms, walking towards the door. "I'm a couple of doors down okay? You'll be okay?"

"Yeah I'm just going to take a shower and then go to bed." She waved her hand dismissively but there was something off about her voice, something she was keeping from me. I don't know why it bothered me. But it did. I was about to say something when I thought against it. She was probably tired, I knew I was. I smiled at her and shut the door behind me.

I opened the door to my room and everything hit me at once. All the things that had been at bay while I was making sure Bella was okay. Everything. Every little thing. My stress, my depression, my hatred. I leant against the door and my knees buckled, my body slid towards the floor. I heard my breathing accelerate as I panicked, and my heart beat erratically against my chest. I wrentched my hands up to my hair and clutched at it, feeling the world press itself against me. I took a deep breath and pulled my hair slightly. It calmed me, if only for a few seconds while I collapsed.

I suppose to anyone watching this would be a panic attack, but it was so much more. The realisation that I was still here, that I still had to breathe, suffocated me. I heard the shower start a few doors down. Sighing I released my hair and let my head fall to the back of my door. What the fuck was I going to do now? My family's concern hit me harder than I realised. They truly would be devastated if I was gone. But I had been through this before. I had already run through all the ramifications.

But of course those consequences didn't factor in the new brown haired girls in my life. It was strange, I had only known her hours, and yet. I felt a tie to her. Like I was meant to protect her, because if I didn't, who would? My breathing had calmed slightly and my heart was beating normally. I pushed myself up on a shaky arm and stood, passing everything in my room, heading straight towards the bathroom. A shower seemed like a perfect idea.

Tells me if you like it...And if you want me to continue it...if not..I'l let it die... :)