Lelouch x C.C. One-shot. Not such a serious story, just here to make fun of Lelouch and to make C.C. look like the goddess of all anime characters (because she is the best!).

Why Did You Give Me Geass?

"C.C.!" Lelouch shouted arrogantly.

"What?" C.C. had always been indifferent, but this time, there was an edge in her voice, like she felt guilty.

"Is that how you're going to answer?! You know exactly what!" Lelouch growled.

"If this is about the incident with Mao, he won't come any---" C.C. was cut off.

"Not that. The geass... Why did you give it to me? What is the geass?" Lelouch said hesitantly.

"Hmm~? Are you seeking me for answers? I thought I was a witch that caused all your grief and wasn't to interfere with your world domination--oops, I mean--"quest" for peace." C.C. pulled out a smirk.

"Y-You!!! Answer the question!!!" Lelouch demanded.

"Who do you think you're talking to? I don't have to answer you're question. You're good at chess, right? Any chess nerd should have the brains to figure out the geass, especially if that idiot actually has the geass himself. Am I right, Mr. Idiot?" C.C. shrugged him off.

"A-Are you insulting the game of chess?!" Lelouch's atmosphere darkened into that of murderous intent.

"I'm not insulting chess. I'm insulting the idiot standing in front of me that plays chess." C.C. said bluntly.

"I-I'll kill you!!!" Lelouch's geass eye glowed.

"Too bad, Mr. Idiot-Who-Plays-Chess. The geass doesn't have any effect on me. Now go and solve that geass mystery of yours, Mr. Idiot-Who-Plays-Chess." C.C. started to walk away.

"Would you stop with the idiot thing?!?!" Lelouch hollered, grabbing a stapler, thinking of its potential as a weapon.

"A stapler... Are you serious?" C.C. snickered.

"Grr...," Lelouch went.

"Wow. Now it's two staplers." C.C. snickered again.

"C.C., no, -beep-! Prepare to die!" Lelouch threatened.

"You...you dare call me by my real name?!?!" C.C. shouted back at him.

"What is it, -beep-? You don't like it when someone who isn't your lover calls you by your true name?" Lelouch smirked.

"No, it's the fact that an idiot like you knows my name. Come here so I can clean that foul tongue for you, my dear Lelouch." C.C. laughed evilly.

C.C. took out a bar of soap from inside her clothes. Lelouch took a step back.

"Why the hell do you carry a bar of soap inside your bra...?" Lelouch looked at her in disbelief.

"Oh, there's more stuff in there. You'll be surprised with what women can carry in their clothing." C.C. grinned.

"Oh, yeah? I'll have to ask a woman if I can ever see one, seeing that this thing standing in front of me has no woman qualities at all." Lelouch pointed out.

"Are you blind? I'm plenty woman, you pervert." C.C. came closer to her.

"Drop the soap bar...," Lelouch sighed.

C.C. dropped it as told, but instead pulled something else out of her clothes. Lelouch gasped when he caught a glimpse of it.

"Lelouch, you're quite the lover-boy, aren't you? Going as far as to have a picture of you kissing Eupehmia vi Britannia." C.C. smirked.

"T-That's..! My mother forced me into it! And besides, it's only on the cheek." Lelouch tried to reason.

"Excuses, excuses. And now you're two-timing Shirley and Kallen." C.C. sighed in a motherly way.

"C.C.!!!" Lelouch yelled, trying to snatch the picture back, but C.C. was too agile for him.

With a swift movement, C.C. pulled Lelouch closer to her, her eyes staring deep into his.

"W-What?" Lelouch felt flustered with C.C. only inches away from his face.

"Lelouch...," C.C. gazed at him.

"C.C., return the picture." Lelouch was back to his arrogant self, no longer swayed by C.C.'s flirting.

"If you give me a kiss." C.C. smiled evilly. She knew he would never do that, meaning that he'd never get the picture back.

Lelouch scowled and backed away, obviously not going to agree to that.

C.C. laughed, her eyes almost tearing from the fun. Suddenly, arms gripped around her and she was pressed into a surprising position. C.C.'s eyes shot wide open from the shock. Lelouch let go and grabbed the picture from C.C.'s frozen hands.

"I win." Lelouch smirked, C.C. gazing at him with shock.

C.C. lost her composure for a moment, placing her hand over her mouth, still feeling the touch from a moment ago, but then went back to her usual self.

"Hmph! It's fine. I've made plenty of copies anyway!" C.C. snickered.

"What?!" Lelouch yelled.

"Anyway, the door's been ringing for a while now." C.C. headed towards the door.

"No! Don't answer the door! What if it's the Student Council?! What if it's Suzaku?! How am I going to explain that you live here with me?!" Lelouch demanded.

"Relax!" C.C. was so carefree.

She opened the door and her heart stopped out of anxiousness.

"PIZZA GUY!!!" C.C. gleamed happily.

Lelouch just collapsed onto the floor, stupefied.

"Ah, thank you for always supporting us, but I have a question. The credit card you're always using, it's under the name Lelouch Lamperouge. It's a man's name, isn't it? Why are you always using it?" the pizza hut guy asked, as it was a right for him to know.

"She what?!?! You've been using my credit card?!?!" Lelouch screamed.

"Uhm...you're Lelouch?" the pizza guy asked.

"Don't worry. Lelouch and I live together. We've made a contract, no, promise to each other." C.C. hurriedly sniffed in the pepperoni fragrance.

"Ah, so you're married, huh? How nice." the pizza guy blushed for them.

"Don't say things that will be obviously misunderstood, C.C.!!!" Lelouch hollered.

"Yes, we're deeply in love. I want to have children, but Lelouch, the bastard, is too busy trying to rule the world." C.C. sighed.

"Ah, I see. Must be tough, huh?" Pizza guy said.

"C.C., I'll kill you!!!" Lelouch screamed.

"He's the type that doesn't want to admit things like, 'C.C., I love you.' or 'I want to be with you forever, C.C.' and things like that. All he ever say is 'C.C., you witch' or 'I'll kill you' or 'You piss me off'. " C.C. sighed, her mouth stuffed with pizza.

"I understand you completely. My girlfriend is like that, too." Pizza guy nodded his head.

"You both are pissing me off!!! Go talk about your love problems elsewhere!!!" Lelouch shouted.

"Ah, that reminds me! Mr. Lamperouge, here's the bill, and the previous one, and the one before that, and the one before that, and so on. Your card's been maxed out five pizza boxes ago." Pizza guy smiled warmly.

"JUST HOW MANY PIZZAS DID YOU EAT?!?!" Lelouch screamed at C.C.

"What? Just use the geass and make him think you paid him already. That's why I gave you the geass." C.C. put more pizza into her mouth.

"You witch... This is why you gave me this damn power?!?!" Lelouch roared.

"You're going to break down the house if you keep screaming like that, darling." C.C. just kept eating.

"I'll kill you!!! I swear it!!!"