Author: Kandy Kuro (Otakkun)
Summary: So what if our level-headed, well-adjusted, mischievous Lydia from the cartoons was in the movie instead of the slightly more suicidal and depressed movie Lydia? Well, for one, things will definitely go better for Betelgeuse.
Warnings: Swearing (Betelgeuse), sexual situations (Betelgeuse), and… well I should probably not say it again… ^^
Disclaimer: I don't own Beetlejuice or Lydia or any of the characters cartoon or movie. I'm only playing with them for a bit, and promise I'm not getting any money from it. Geez.
Author's Notes: Kaa! I got 7 reviews now! *hugs reviews* I'm glad I'm getting this right. Also please note I don't usually update this quickly (I've got 3 chapters in just a day) usually there's a longer wait, but I'm still very happy about my reviews,(*eats cookie bribe guiltily*) and the chapters aren't very long by themselves. Also, since Beetlejuice is in this chapter, there's going to be a lot of cursing and capital letters. Just a warning. Well, anyway… LET'S GET ON WITH IT!!!
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Dark Heroine
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Lydia turned around slowly trying to figure out where that voice had come from. In her mind she remembered the weird western commercial that had come on just a couple of minutes ago, so, automatically, the girl turned to look at the television, but this time it stayed off.
"Hey! Bright eyes! WRONG WAY!" The voice screamed, and Lydia heard a bit of a squeak in the tone, like the guy was filled with helium. The girl also noticed that a 'WRONG WAY' sign had appeared on the TV with the word 'dumbass' written in sharpie below the bold words. The girl knew she should probably feel offended, but couldn't help but smile at the prop.
The little Goth girl turned around and placed her hands on her hips. "Okay, where?"
"Just follow the sound of - ah, fuck it - I'M IN THE MODEL!" The voice seemed to change jaggedly through tones, and Lydia sighed at the guy's obvious impatience. She did, however, find out where he was.
In the graveyard of the model (and Lydia grinned when she realized why the graveyard in the commercial looked so fake), there was a guy of about three inches sitting easily on a tombstone. "Hey, babes, how's it goin'?"
Lydia's grin widened, "You looked bigger on TV."
This seemed to get at the pint-sized ghost, since he hopped off his tombstone and glared up at the girl with a look that said looks-like-I-need-to-explain-something-to-ya. "Let's just get somethin' straight here babes. I'm not usually this, um, well FUCKING TINY. It's sorta just a temporary thing, know what I mean?"
"Not really." The girl answered smiling slightly. The guy went from crazy to smooth seamlessly, and she thought it was hilarious, but she wasn't sure if he'd meant for it to be funny and didn't want to start laughing if he hadn't.
Meanwhile the ghost seemed to be trying to explain. "Well, you know, it's like a, um, curse!" He said the last word with a flourish, grinning up at her like all the pieces of his story were coming together for him. "Yeah, got into a situation with this old hag, kinda a looked-at-you-the-wrong-way thing, completely not my fault, and ended up, well like this!"
Lydia had to admit that sounded like a bad break (and considering she was talking to a dead guy maybe even true), but the way he said it made her think of those guys on the corners or in the subways of New York who's grandmothers' were on their deathbeds (off and on throughout the year) and could-she-lend-them-a-couple-of-bucks-for-medical-reasons-you-know. But to this guy's credit, he hadn't asked for-
"So whada ya say babes? Wanna help me out here?" The ghost grinned up at her with his arms spread wide.
-anything…
Lydia shook her head and sighed, but at the same time she couldn't help but smile a bit at the guy. "Wow. A 3-inch-tall conman."
"I TOLD YOU I'M NOT 3 INCHES! Shit." The conman growled, then spat something out that looked suspiciously like a cockroach into his hand, then shoved it back into his mouth and ate it again. "Look, babes, I ain't askin' for much, okay? I just need you to say my name three times." He said the words slowly and held up three fingers for emphasis.
"And why exactly can't you do it?" The young girl smirked, crossing her arms. She bet this was gonna be good.
"Well, ya see babes, I got this thing, like a cold or somethin' and…" He took this time to cough convincingly actually hacking up what looked to be that same poor cockroach from before. Oddly enough it was still alive and quickly made a break for it. "Hey, get back here!"
Lydia turned around quickly and put her hand over her mouth, trying desperately not to laugh. The ghost seemed to think he'd made her sick, and disturbingly enough looked proud of himself. "Anyway, let's just say I'm havin' some trouble in the sayin' my own name department… But hey! You got it first try didn't cha babes?"
"Wait, that's your name?" Lydia actually did give a little giggle, "I thought it was a spell."
"It is-well it isn't-and-AH! JUST SAY IT! Two more times, babes. C'mon!" Betelgeuse shouted, jumping and fidgeting like he wanted to jump up there and pull the words out of her.
She probably would have had something to say back at the cursed ghost, but she stopped when she heard her father calling from downstairs.
"Lydia? Where are you? I got take-out!"
The girl sighed; they were still getting Chinese take-out even though they probably had plenty of places to get fresh ingredients for home-made food. Then again, she should probably be grateful Delia hadn't decided to cook. She turned toward the door as a squeaky voice screamed at her to stop. "Where ya goin' babes! Just two quick words! Just bam! Bam!"
Lydia smirked and looked back at the model, "I'm going to go eat. We can continue this conversation after I'm done OK?"
She ignored his protest of "NO! It's NOT OKAY!" and instead grabbed a pen and piece of paper from one of the desks and wrote something. Betelgeuse did his best to eavesdrop from across the room, but it only took a moment for her to come back over to the model and place the slip of paper over a few of the graves. "Also if you want people to be able to say your name you might want to use this. Not everyone is familiar with astrology, right, Beetlegiest?"
The ghost looked so pissed he was actually smoking from the head. Lydia snickered and went for the door. She was half way out when she looked back. "You'll still be here when I get back, right?"
Betelgeuse was leaning moodily against a headstone, "Trust me babes, I'm gonna be here all FUCKING DAY!"
Lydia frowned, almost feeling guilty, "You don't need to yell, and I'll be back in a few minutes anyway. See ya!" She disappeared out the door, shouting to her dad that she was coming.
"Heh. Dumb broad." Betelgeuse grumbled, kicking a few plastic trees over. He looked over at the slip of paper where the word 'BEETLEJUICE' was written in big clear letters. He wasn't especially literate (he grew up in the 1360's what do you expect?) but he could tell what it said.
He took out a few of his Bio-exorcist fliers and looked them over; 'Betelgeuse' was the name in his file, but… He snapped his fingers and the fliers adjusted their lettering until they each had 'Beetlejuice' listed three times. He looked at them for about a second before shoving them back into one of his pockets. "Eh, not bad."
He shifted his shoulders awkwardly; he was probably still stiff from his escape from the grave, a hard thing to do when you were 6-centimeters-under. He looked down at the grimy brown trench coat he was wearing, one of the few normal-ish looking outfits he possessed. Half a thought changed that, and he was suddenly wearing his favorite white-and-black striped suit he liked to say was for 'business'.
He threw his arms out suddenly, jerking his sleeves back to his wrists from where they'd fallen down onto his hands; an easy way to tell it wasn't fitted (it was actually pretty cheap) though he never felt like fixing it. He took out a cigarette that was only halfway burned through and took a short drag from it, letting out more smoke than he should have. "I wonder what's for dinner." Then he was gone from the model leaving only the echo of his laugher behind him.
To Be Continued…
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A/N: Yep, movie BJ. He's the best~! Cartoon BJ was still Beetlejuice -just more kid friendly- and as long as it's Beetlejuice cartoon Lyds can deal with him. Besides I can't take away BJ's precious curse words and perverted tendencies! Basically the only one changing is Lydia -her parents, Beetlejuice, etc are all movie verse. ^^ Review again *makes me happy*.
Also, sorry this one's a bit shorter than the others. None of the chapters have been very long, but this one's the shortest. But I did want there first encounter to be in its own chapter. I had more to it before but decided to put that in chapter 4. ^^ Next chapter is the deal that breaks any chance of Lydia getting caught up in any marriage deals. *evil grin*