AN: Just a holiday story I dashed off today. It's got a few characters from my other stories in it, but it's a stand alone. I hope everyone is having a happy holiday season!
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The Man Who Has Everything
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By Cat Moon
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Josef Konstantin and Christmas. Two things that at first glance didn't seem to go together at all, unless he was playing the part of Scrooge. It was true that he was one of the richest men in L.A., and not at all stingy. He had excellent tastes and would spend obscene amounts of money on his friends without a second thought. His corporation was involved in numerous charitable works, and regularly gave back to the community. The fact that it was a tax deduction was just an added bonus. Josef was generous with his loved ones, and spared no mercy with his enemies.
However, Christmas, that quaint human season where they celebrate their religious holiday by getting into credit card debt and pretending to love everyone, drinking too much at the company party and spoiling the kids rotten with material items… just didn't seem like a vampire holiday. Even if you didn't believe in that whole undead damned thing. Christmas was primarily a holiday for the devout and the children – of which Josef was neither.
The past few holidays had been the most different Josef had ever spent in four hundred years though. By some miracle or decree of the universe there were children to cater to. Seeing the wonder of the holiday through a child's eyes, or the true spirit of the season through the loving acts of those closest to you, can effect even the most cynical of vampires.
Of course, he'd probably never admit it.
XXX
"Do I have to say please?" Beth had asked over the telephone forty minutes earlier.
"C'mon Nora, babysitting just isn't my thing," Josef had protested, even though he knew it would be to no avail. It was pathetic, really, she was Mick's wife not his, but he couldn't say no to her either.
"I'll be home really soon, I just have to wrap up this story. Mick can't leave the community center till eleven thirty, and the babysitter has someplace else to be."
"Yeah, okay, I'll relieve her," Josef had muttered, ringing off. He couldn't believe they were all working on Christmas Eve! He was supposed to be the workaholic scrooge and even he didn't work on the holiday.
And so that's how he found himself at Mick's place, minding three little ones who were all jazzed up on sugar cookies and anticipation of Santa's visit. It was supposed to be their bedtime, but they were very hyper and not inclined to sleep.
"Aren't you rug rats supposed to be in bed?" Josef asked them with an arched eyebrow. There had been no sign of them when he'd arrived and relieved the babysitter, but as soon as she'd left they were bounding into the room and jumping onto the couch beside him.
"But Uncle Josef, tonight Santa comes! Aren't you excited about Santa?" Michelle asked him, bouncing on the cushions.
"Santa is for children," he replied. Michael looked at him with wide eyes.
"The spirit of Santa should be in everyone's hearts," the oldest, the one nicknamed Sheba by Josef (as in "the Queen of Sheba" because she ruled her kingdom) piped in. Obviously a sentiment she had gotten from her parents, or more specifically, her father.
And dammit, he couldn't think of a come-back for that one. He should have been asking who the milk and cookies that were sitting on a table near the tree were for, or how Santa was going to come down the "glass fireplace" but he couldn't bring himself to tarnish their enthusiasm. Sad enough they'd grow up to the reality of life too soon.
"Well I've heard that Santa won't come at all until you're in bed," he tried.
"Santa won't be arriving in L.A. for hours yet, we're tracking him on Norad," Michael informed him.
Josef gave Sheba a suspicious look.
"What?!" she responded to it. "I'm not that much older, why does everybody assume it's always my fault?"
"What's ass-ume mean? Michelle asked, giving the other girl an adoring look.
"I wonder why," Josef quipped, and tweaked Sheba's nose affectionately. "But the real question is, have you been naughty or nice?"
"But Uncle Josef, you told me it's best to be nicely naughty," the outspoken girl reminded him.
Josef sighed in exasperation. "Okay, how about you all get in bed and I'll tell you a story? You need to get your rest, because it's going to take a lot of energy to open all those presents tomorrow morning."
"All as in lots?" Michael asked.
"Mr. Claus is a business associate of mine, and I have it on good authority that they won't even all fit under that tree over there." He gestured to the twinkling evergreen in the corner. "Of course, I could always call him on his cell phone and tell him you're not minding…"
Before he'd even finished the sentence, all three were scampering off for the bedroom at breakneck speed.
Josef followed them at a more sedate pace, snickering. When he got to the door, he caught up with Sheba, who'd hung back. "Personally, I know he doesn't exist," she whispered to her uncle. "But I get caught up in the magic, too."
"Do you believe in magic?" he asked the girl.
"How could I not?" she responded. "I'm a miracle."
Profound words from the mouth of a babe. To see Christmas from the viewpoint of those innocent – or not so innocent -- children's perspectives, it was hard to be unaffected. One could definitely envy their simple enjoyment. And how could anyone not believe in magic, when all three of them were their parents' gifts? He had something in common with them too; he too had been a miracle child. That thought amused him, as he ushered them all into Mick and Beth's big bed and started the bedtime story.
XXX
Beth showed up after he'd finally gotten the terrible threesome to sleep. She breezed in with shopping bags full of last minute gifts and was asking for another favor even before she'd gotten her jacket off.
"Do you mind picking the others up at the Center? I have Mick's car since mine's in the shop, and by the time you get there they should be finished with their shift." She threw her jacket on the back of the chair and started taking stuff out of the bags. "The M&M's decided on a couple of last minute gifts Santa just had to bring them, and I still have to get them wrapped and get the stuff under the tree…"
Josef heaved a put-upon sigh that might have been mostly for appearances. "This might be my Christmas gift to you," he warned. "One night as Beth's errand boy."
"I know you're more the gigolo type," she replied with a smile and a kiss on his cheek.
"You keep getting that backwards," he joked as he headed for the door. "I'm not a gigolo, I have gigolos."
"Don't forget the freshies," she called after him.
"Don't remind me," he said sadly, and it wasn't visions of sugarplums that were dancing through his head.
XXX
Josef entered the Community Center fifteen minutes later, trying not to feel like the unhired help. Mick, Shane, and Sara were sitting at the desks scattered around the office. Mick was on the phone, but Shane got up and made his was over to Josef when he saw him.
Since his days in Resurrection, Alaska, Shane had made it a holiday tradition of his to give something back to the community as his "gift." For instance, when he was a sheriff, he would always work on Christmas so that the others could be with their families. When the St. John's had heard about it, they loved the idea. And that was how it came to be that Mick, Shane, and Sara were manning the suicide hotline, giving those who would normally volunteer their time the night off. Beth had done a story on the hotline for Buzz Wire, to call attention to an often forgotten segment of the community whose holiday season wasn't merry or joyful.
Shane threw an arm around his brother's shoulders. "Are you our relief?" he joked, keeping his voice low in deference to the vampire on the phone.
"Not hardly. Just your chauffer for the evening."
"Mick is in the middle of a call, but as soon as he's through we can go."
"Joy."
As they waited, with nothing else to do it was hard for those with vampire hearing not to listen in on both sides of the conversation. The woman on the other end obviously didn't have a lot of blessings in her life at the moment. It was hard not to appreciate your own when listening to her, even for someone as non-sentimental as Josef.
"I know how you feel," Mick was telling the caller.
"How could you possibly know?!" she demanded, the anguish in her voice obvious. "I have no one. If I died tonight, no one would even notice the body until maybe the neighbors noticed the smell. You don't know how terrifying that thought is."
"I lost my family, too," Mick explained. "For a lot of years I tried to hide from the world. I may not be in your shoes, but I know the pain of being alone; feeling like an unlovable freak that was cursed to never have love or light in his life again."
"If you're gonna tell me someone wonderful came along to change your life, don't bother. Things like that don't happen to me."
"Okay," Mick conceded. "I understand where you're coming from. I don't blame you. It was a long fifty years."
"Fifty years? You don't sound that old…" the caller told him. "How did you get the strength to endure?"
He hoped she was starting to hear him. "I'm not sure," he admitted. "I guess, deep down, I wanted to survive. I just wanted the life I was robbed of, someone to love and be loved by. She's my soul mate, and if I had given up we never would have found each other."
"What if that's not in the cards for me? Maybe I don't wanna wait until I'm a senior citizen to find it."
Mick's voice gentled even more, vibrating with sincere caring. "I think you're hurting bad. The pain is all you can feel right now. You don't want to die though; all you want to do is be loved. That's all any of us want. To be valued, like your life is worth something to someone."
They could hear the quiet crying over the line. "I know I'm boring, not very much fun or good looking, and I don't have much to offer anyone, and maybe I've made some mistakes and could be a nicer person… but I'm a human being too…. Don't I deserve love?!"
"Yes," Mick answered emphatically. "And you loved yourself enough to make this call. Those of us who are here at the hotline love you enough to be here tonight, when you need us, even though we don't know you personally. Because everyone deserves love. Don't give up now. Maybe this call is a gift for you, from the Universe, from God, whatever you believe in. Maybe you can find some hope in that."
"How do I do that?" she asked hesitantly, but she'd stopped crying.
"I can help with that," he assured her. "Did you know that something like an imbalance in the chemicals in the brain can make us feel hopeless? If that's the case here, finding the right medication could change your perspective totally. There are also counselors available who care, and can help you figure out how to improve your life. It doesn't matter if you have health insurance or not, they can get you help."
"I guess I could try it…"
Mick gave her the number to call, making sure she wrote it down. "Will you promise to give it another year, at least?" he asked. "See what things are like next year? If they aren't any better, you can call me back and give me hell."
"Who do I ask for?" They could now hear a hint of amusement in her voice.
"Call me St. Mick," he said with a grin, relieved that the crisis was over, for now.
"You know, you have a pretty sexy voice for a geriatric," the caller told him.
"That's what my wife says, too!" he responded with a laugh. "You take care of yourself, okay?"
"I'll try."
"That's all any of us can do." Mick hung up the receiver, wiping the sweat off his brow.
"Why do I get the feeling 'St. Mick' here will go to her house and personally make it his business to be her guardian angel if she does call back next year?" Josef asked rhetorically.
"If that's what it takes," Mick answered mildly.
"Not sure that particular technique was in the manual," Shane told him.
"This is not an easy job," Mick commented to the others. "I just hope I got through to her. Nobody should be alone on Christmas Eve." He glanced at Josef, who eyed him suspiciously when he caught the gaze.
At that moment their relief walked in, a man and a woman who would be taking over the phones for the next shift.
They said their greetings to the newcomers and prepared to leave. As they were heading out, Mick turned to Josef. "Now, Beth has agreed to stay home with the kids tonight, so you can come to the midnight service at Sanctuary Church with us."
"You know I hate it when you set me up," Josef complained.
"If you're not good, Santa won't come," Shane advised him sternly.
"Oh, are you playing Santa this year?" Josef inquired with a suggestive tone.
"That's it, you need Church, young man!" Mick grabbed Josef by the earlobe and dragged him to the car, acting entirely too much like he'd been dying to do that for ages.
"He does look exceptionally yummy in nothing but a red Santa hat and bow," Sara teased, slipping her arm around Shane, her hand sneaking into his back pocket.
XXX
Later that night, or morning, the group enjoyed some quiet time at Mick's. The adults had exchanged most of their presents already. Josef's present to the couples had been a romantic night out on the town in New York City last weekend; dinner at a fine restaurant where the staff didn't raise an eyebrow at the fact that only a few of the party were eating food, skating at Rockefeller center, and a carriage ride through Central Park, culminating with an overnight at the Plaza (which, unbeknownst to most, is a vamp friendly hotel). Mick and Beth had loved the romantic carriage ride the most, while the skating was more Shane and Sara's speed, and along with Josef they'd had a blast playing on the ice.
The four might have despaired that they'd never find a great gift like that to give Josef in return…except that they had indeed come up with the perfect present for him.
"Josef," Mick began, "we asked ourselves, what do you get a man who has everything, including more money than a Rockefeller?"
"It was daunting," Shane continued to explain, "considering the extravagant presents you give…but Mick and I worked together and managed to pull this one off."
"Pull what off?" Josef asked, looking around the room at the grinning faces. "Is it something that's going to embarrass me?"
"Nope. But you'd better hit the freezer now, 'cause you're gonna need a lot of rest for your tee time with Tiger tomorrow night."
"Wha—" Josef uncharacteristically stuttered. "Are you serious? You set up a nighttime golf game between me and Tiger Woods?!"
"I remember you expressing the desire a few years ago," Mick said.
"Yeah, and a few decades ago you got me a meeting with my idol, Jerry Lee Lewis," Shane added. "So an idea was born."
"Damn!" Josef exclaimed in excitement, jumping up. "I've got to go now – I have to practice! What should I wear? Crap – forget it, I forgot who I was asking! This is… this is amazing!"
"Think he likes it?" Sara quipped in amusement as Josef flew out the door with a wave.
"I've never seen him like that before," Beth agreed. "So I think it's a hit."
Josef poked his head back in a moment later. "Definitely the best present I've ever gotten. Thank you. Merry Christmas."
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The end
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And Happy Holidays to everyone here as well – whatever holiday you celebrate. When we're spending time with our family and friends, maybe we can also say an extra prayer for those among us who are unable to share in the joy of the season, for whatever reason.
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PS: Josef mentioned night putting with Tiger in "Dr. Feelgood"
12/25/08