Olympian Pie
Hello. The following is a parody of the song "American Pie", basically mourning over the fact that the "good PJO fic" is, as of late, fairly obsolete. I would highly recommend listening to the song as you read the parody; otherwise the lines are sure to sound odd and disjointed.
I am greatly indebted to my wonderful beta-reader, the Epitome of Randomness.
Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with Rick Riordan.
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A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
When PJO fics were few and far between.
And if I'd known what I'd see today
The number of awful fics, I'd pray
That someone would believe what I had seen
Because if someone had told me
The horrible writers I would see
I would laugh in their face
Call them such a disgrace.
I can't remember if I cried
When I realized the turning of the tide
But something touched me deep inside.
The day the good fics died.
So sigh, sigh and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This'll be the day good writers die
This'll be the day good writers die.
Did you write PJO,
And do you know why the writing's so
Low quality crap of late?
Do you believe in flames or not,
Can CC stop the nasty rot
Can you still read a story that is great?
Well, I know that I can't find the one
That'll prove to me the era's done
Of stupid Mary-Sues
It gives me a case of blues.
I'm fed up with all those damn OCs
And grammar that makes me yell, "Oh, please!"
And still we've yet to be appeased
For the day the good fics died.
They are no more, so
Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This'll be the day good writers die
This'll be the day good writers die.
Now for so many months we've been on our own
Reading fics that make us all groan
But that's not how it used to be.
Once upon a time, the good writers reigned
For a while, the quality only gained
But now all that is over-sadly...
Oh, and if for a second you look away
From FanFiction when you look back you'll say
"How could these fics've multiplied?
I thought the flamers lied!"
Because, really, who would've thought
The havoc that bad fics have wrought
It's a trap in which all of us are caught
Since the day the good fics died.
They are no more, so
Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This'll be the day good writers die
This'll be the day good writers die.
Plot mistakes, and spelling ones, too
And now it's up to me and you
To rectify what went so wrong
Review and tell them what's so bad
About their fic; don't make them mad
And try and spread the word about this song
Now there's something that you can do
Just tell bad writers in a review
Why their story is awful
And flames are NOT unlawful!
So if they've got any sense at all
The writers will listen to our call
Before PJO fics standing does further fall
From the day the good fics died
They are no more, so
Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This'll be the day good writers die
This'll be the day good writers die.
Oh, I think we can do it if we try
I'm not making it up; it's not a lie
We can save the fics of PJO!
So come on, give CC, and give it quick
If you do it enough, maybe it will stick
And the good fics will again grow
Now you may think I'm pretty weird
But I assure you that this is what was feared
Not only just from me
But from the "Flames" community
And as the number of bad writers keeps on swelling
It expands daily; there's no telling
When it will stop, till then I'll keep yelling,
'Bout the day the good fics died
They are no more, so
Sigh, sigh and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This'll be the day good writers die
This'll be the day good writers die.
A theory about how this came to be
From my friend: "Generation MTV
Kids are the ones writing now
None of them have read a lot
That's why their stories are lacking plot
As well as all of the usual 'wow' "
So, please, have someone beta-read
Follow the TOS, the writer's creed
Come up with a decent plot-line
Don't hurry, take your sweet time
Because all the fics that were the best?
The authors worked harder than the rest
And you can do it, too; make good writing your quest
No more of the day the good fics died.
They'll come once more, and we won't
Sigh, sigh, and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This WON'T be the day good writers die
This WON'T be the day good writers die.
They'll come once more, and we won't
Sigh, sigh, and get ready to cry
Navigate as of late
To FanFiction-ask why
PJO fandom's doom is drawing so nigh
This WON'T be the day good writers die
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Well, there you have it. I hope that it was enjoyable to read and got the point across. Flames are accepted. However, as I said in the summary, most of the flamers are trying to eliminate bad fanfiction-which is exactly what I strive to do with this song. Rather pointless, then, to do so.
Sincerely,
Sheva Das