Um. Yeah. This is an AU/AH story that popped up in my mind one night while I was sleeping. I tried to make the characters as IC as possible, but... eh. Sorry if this sucked ass, because, well, I was tired when I wrote this. And I don't really like how I ended this, but what can you do :/
And sorry if I get details wrong too, because I don't live in Florida, and probably never will. I'm a Seattlite, so, excuse the mistakes. And this story has some dark stuff in it too, but I don't think I'm going to write graphic enough details that would call for an M rating.
Stephenie Meyer provides the characters, I just throw ugly problems at them.
BPOV
I sucked in a deep breath. My lungs expanded, slowly, gratifyingly.
Was I really going to do this? Tonight?
Yes.
No.
The minute he proposed to her was the incentive I needed to make my decision. Nothing was holding me back now. How long had I pondered over this anyway? Too long.
She'd understand. Sweet, ditsy, lovable Renee. Eventually, as her stomach protrudes and the wedding commences, she'll forget all about her sulky, angst-ridden daughter. Phil was the distraction she craved for, longed for. The perfect man for her short attention span tendencies.
Slowly, tears pricked my eyes and leaked out at the corners.
No I will not cry.
With my small backpack filled to the brim, almost overflowing with the clothes I stashed inside, I hopped out of my window, landing with a thump. Grass stained the whites of my sneakers. But my appearance was not much of concern anymore. Not when surviving was more important.
Get through the night.
That was all I needed to do. Get through the night, and we'll be okay. Me, Renee, Phil, Charlie...
Charlie.
How would he take me showing up at his doorstep? Three years have passed since I've seen him, but surely he wouldn't turn away his only daughter. A little angry perhaps, but not to an extent where he'd drive me back to Renee...
Of course not. The father that had never been around was the type of man who preferred not knowing, living in blissfully unaware instead of actually putting himself in a tough situation. Turn a blind eye, Charlie. That's what you're good at.
My feet were taking me to a place I didn't know.
Running.
Running.
Cars rushed past me in a blur, and nothing was visible to me but the horizon that loomed ahead of me. Tampa to Forks was one hell of a run, but I could do it. I had to do it.
Deep down, I knew this was wrong. Escaping my problems will only lead me to bigger ones, ones that would trap me under and suffocate me, leaving me no way out. I knew this. I knew this.
Yet, at the same time I didn't.
I reasoned myself that leaving was only a means to an end. The end being able to start anew, erase the ghosts of my pasts. Away from him and her and them and those people that are stupid and judge and the scum of society.
--
If I were to describe Renee in one word, it'd be perceptive.
True, that would contradict everything that she is, but just leave it up to Renee to have a contradicting personality.
She sees through her eyes a more different world. One of troublesome people and real life dilemmas and other shit. Observant.
At the same time, she still flows through life, happy, jubilant. Renee was like Charlie. She saw things with a sharp eye, but rather than using her unique talent, it was better to ignore everything and pretend that everything's okay.
One day reality will come crashing down on her and too late she'd realize how mistaken she was.
Reality being my deserting her. Sneaking out at an hour when the warm sun long since disappeared, and chilly winds attacked you every second.
Would she worry? Of course. Renee, being Renee, would panic and sob for her daughter, crying rape, rape, kidnapping, like the boy who cried wolf. She'd phone the police, and ravage through my belongings, searching for something that might give her a hint of my location. She'd steal my day planner and flipped through the pages, looking for a friend's number to call. And be dismally disappointed.
Friendship wasn't a word I was too familiar with in my vocabulary. Most of the people at my school were acquaintances, at most. I never found myself connecting with anyone, or finding the urge to prattle on about boys and the new D&G spring line.
Sadly, my best friend was my own mother. Or, was, before she had met Phil. Glamorous, striving baseball player Phil. You wouldn't be able to find a bone in my body that resents her having her happiness, but did I get lonely? I suppose so.
The air swirled around me, chilly and cold. It must have been a mile. Two miles. Three miles. Did I pass the city limits yet? Probably not.
Sweat pooled at the nape of my neck, coating it sticky and wet. The Courtney Campbell Causeway was straight ahead, and if I headed east, it would take me only two days to reach Forks...
...By car. If only my mother had bought me that used Toyota a few months back. But, as everything was within walking distance, and I had no social life, she felt it was an unnecessary need.
Said the woman who wanted to take skydiving lessons in the middle of January when we were living in California.
The Causeway was strangely empty, deserted almost except for a few cars. Light traffic today. The fewer witnesses the better.
By this time, my eyes had adjusted to the darkness of the night, and I could see fairly well what was in front of me. It might not be great, but at least I'd know if a shitfaced drunk would come swerving my direction. Better that than nothing.
As I ran farther, and farther, I saw the outline of a person on the side of the bridge. His tousled hair was noticeable even from afar, and he was pacing back and forth. I continued to study him.
He stopped pacing and finally, hoisted himself on the ledge.
My mind went crazy, and all logic had left my mind. Before I could stop myself, the words tumbled out of my mouth.
"What the fuck are you doing?!"
EPOV
I don't know how I ended up here. I don't know what time it was when I left, or whether I had homework tonight, or if my father was coming home. I just knew that I wanted to escape.
Even if for a temporary moment. I'd gladly take momentary relief, than to go back home...
Where I was self-loathing monster, who deserved to ripped from limb to limb, and then have the discarded pieces burned.
Her memory, her words, her everything was etched forever, permanently into my memory. I wanted to make it stop, let go, stop it from coming back. But no matter what I do, she keeps coming back to haunt me.
Edward, sweetheart, honey, don't you like having me around?
Her laugh rang clearly in my mind, like it was yesterday when it happened. Taunting. Sneering. Disdainfully mocking me.
So I made my decision, my mind set on just letting go completely.
Of course, this would devastate my mother, but she'd survive. No more would I have to look into their eyes and see the sadness veiled behind their plastered on smiles. The awkward silences. The talks.
The bridge was almost abandoned, this late at night. There was no one around, except for cars. Perfect.
Should I do it fast, and get it over with?
Or prolong it, as I should, because that was the only thing fit for me? A short, quick death would only be too easy, which was why I hadn't just swallowed the pills in the cabinet and wash it down with my father's best liquor.
Fuck it. I should jump, and just fall.
I maneuvered stealthily on the ledge of the bridge. The water beneath looked so inviting, a siren calling me to its realms.
Then I heard it. It.
A voice, that trembled, but still loud, yelled out, "What the fuck are you doing?!"
I nearly lost my footing. Turning around, I saw a young girl, around my age stare at me with her large brown eyes. Scared. Terrified.
Oh right, I was just about to face my end while she was standing by.
"Oy! You! Get off of there!" she screeched. Her face was so pallid, lost of all color except for her pink full lips, that I thought I should get off before she passed out. No need for this to play off as a murder-suicide. I will not have another life ruined at my selfish hands. Jumping was no hard task, and I landed neatly on the ground, almost in a crouch.
"Yes?"
Her eyes roamed my body, as expected, until finally meeting my eyes.
"What were you thinking?" she seethed through her clenched teeth.
"Thinking? Whatever do you mean?"
She sputtered, and choked, and finally spit out, "Almost attempting suicide! Are you insane? Do you despise yourself, your life, your family so much that you're giving up? Coward!"
I almost snorted in laughter, but realizing that she was completely serious, I decided otherwise. "Well, what other purpose would I be here for? The grand scenery?"
I cocked my eyebrow at her, as she fumed in silence. "What are you doing here, then? Bit late for a jog, isn't it?"
Her face blushed furiously, as she stomped towards me. Her tiny finger poked me in the chest as she said, "I'll have you know that it is absolutely none of your business what I do at night."
"Then why are you stopping me? If I recall, this is my life, so you have no business stalling me either."
"I'm stalling you from making the biggest error!"
"Yes, well," I said dryly, "I'm capable of thinking for myself, thanks." Her finger fell to her side, limply.
Neither of us said anything for a moment, so I finally replied, "Excuse me, I have some things to wrap up. Dawn is breaking soon, and I'd rather have no witnesses."
"Shameful of what you're about to do?"
"What is your problem?"
"Just... don't. At least not tonight."
"Why not?"
"You have a car right?" She bit her lip, and rocked back on the balls of her feet.
"Yeah, why?"
"Can you give me a ride to Seattle?"