Title: The Marauders Meet Genelle, OR Harry Potter and the Obsessive Fans THE SEQUEL! (Scary thought, isn't it?)
Author: R.J. Moony.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: RL/SB, among others, I suppose, but that's my OTP forever and ever, canon be damned!
Summary: Genelle is back, and this time has set her sights on Hogwarts' original mischief makers! Oh dear...
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, and never will, though occasionally Remus and Sirius come visit and tell me how utterly disappointed they are that the sordid, gay details of their relationship did not make it into the books.
A/N: So. A long, long time ago, before shit happened to any of us...Genelle and I got slightly tipsy off wine we stole from my grandma, and we wrote this. I highly doubt that this level of genius will ever be accomplished again, so it will probably never be finished, but it was off to a good start, eh? I wish we had finished this. I really, really do. Maybe I should give it a whirl...
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James, Peter, Remus, and Sirius were having a great day. Exams were finished, and they had just embarrassed the hell out of Severus Snape. Of course, this had caused yet another rejection of James by Lily...not that this was anything new. They were just trotting back up to the castle, when suddenly Sirius noticed something...
SIRIUS: Ooh, shiny!
JAMES: What the fuck are you talking about, dogbone?
SIRIUS: Dogbone? What the...nevermind. Anyway...your watch is SHINY!
REMUS: Now that you mention it, it does have a certain...shiny-ness to it...I guess...
PETER: It shines like your eyes in the moonlight, James!
JAMES: ...dude, you killed it. And that's just really disturbing.
But he gives him a wink, anyway. Everyone notices.
SIRIUS: You'd accept a pass from anyone, wouldn't you?
REMUS: James, I'm deeply offended. I thought I was the only one...
SIRIUS: You and Snape.
James threw up on his watch.
SIRIUS: Hey...it's still shiny!
JAMES: What is it with you and my watch? It's almost like Peter and my eyes...d'ya think Evans noticed that they shine in the moonlight?
ALL: GET OVER HER, HORNY ANTELOPE!
JAMES: I AM NOT AN ANTELOPE! I'M A SEXY STAG! AND PETER KNOWS IT!
The entirety of Hogwarts school stopped and stared at the (unquestionably horny) Potter boy.
RANDOM SECOND YEAR GUY WITH LISP: Stop yelling, you silly goose...and I like your shiny watch! ::giggle::
JAMES: 0_o
SIRIUS: I like your watch too, Prongs. Lemme hold it!
JAMES: Okay, if you insist...::starts to undo pants::
SIRIUS: Not that, arse--
JAMES: Oh, you mean my ass?
SIRIUS: Yes! I mean, no! YOUR WATCH!
JAMES: ::disappointed:: So you don't want to see my fuckstick?
PETER: I do!
REMUS: ::musing:: Maybe it'll be shiny like the watch...
SIRIUS: Remus! Not you, too?
REMUS: I said that out loud? Oh, erm...just kidding?
SIRIUS: ::jealous glare::
REMUS: ::blush::
PETER: Well, are we going to see it or not?
JAMES: What? No!
SIRIUS: I want to see the watch!
JAMES: NO!
So, naturally, Sirius dives for the puke-covered watch, which is, by the way, still shiny. Of course, Remus joined in to help his Sirius (and to take the chance to cop a feel). Peter just stared at James' ass.
PETER: I wonder if James would notice if I grabbed his ass...
Out of curiosity, he gave it a try. And then he felt a jerk around his navel that he thought had something to do with hormones, but he soon discovered was just that portkey-feeling when he found himself no longer at Hogwarts, but rather among stacks of muggle books.