"Tales of Dissidia"
By DarkCyradis
Edited: 8.25.09
Disclaimer: Square-Enix owns Dissidia, Final Fantasy and all the wonderful games, characters and derivative works thereof.
Note: Luneth replaces Onion Knight as the FF3 hero b/c I started writing this before that particular announcement.
Warnings: AU story. General silliness, doses of OOC-ness and extreme crack! Please take it all with a grain of salt. ^^; PG-13 for language. Some BL. Mild spoilers for FFI – X.
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TALES OF DISSIDIA
Chapter 4k: Battle 10— Terra vs. Emperor
[Huffing and puffing, Tet-chan staggers up the last of the 100+ stone steps leading to the secluded Arena X, high in the volcanic hills. His headset crackles, reminding him again that the battles are running too far behind, his schedule is shot to hell, etc, etc, and nods to himself determinedly. Catching his breath, he pushes the stone gates of the arena open and finds an unexpected sight beyond.]
[In the ring, there are two very large magical shields in place on opposite ends. Terra stands tense and poised for battle in one. In the other, Emperor—having somehow procured a beautifully carved and expensive-looking low-backed throne—is plopped comfortably in his seat, legs crossed, a dark glass of wine in one hand. A wan smile plays on his lips.]
[At the sound of Tet-chan's approaching footsteps, Terra looks up.]
Terra: Tet-chan!
Tet-chan: Terra! Emperor! What on earth is going on? Why is your battle taking so long?? Is there a problem?
Emperor: No problem at all, Tet-chan. We were just pausing our battle for a moment.
Tet-chan: Pausing? Why?
Terra: [looking very uncomfortable] I don't know. He just stopped fighting me about twenty minutes ago and put a shield up.
Tet-chan: Emperor, what is the meaning of this?! This isn't supposed to be a battle of attrition! Did you think Terra would give in if you made her wait long enough?
Emperor: [smoothly] Nothing of the kind, my dear sir! I simply wanted to take this exquisite opportunity of having Miss Terra all to myself to bask in the radiance of her beauty.
Tet-chan: Huh??
Terra: [blushing violently] H-he keeps saying things like that and refuses to fight me or lower his shield so I can fight him!
Emperor: My dear, you have already won this battle. Just allow my piteous self to linger and gaze upon your heavenly countenance a little longer…
Tet-chan: … … … … …
Terra: [looking at Tet-chan pleadingly] Tet-chan…?
Tet-chan: I… I have no words… … …
Terra: But can't you do something…?
Tet-chan: Err, about villains and sexual harassment? No. They really have carte blanche for that kind of thing, unfortunately… [glancing hastily at Emperor] Except, of course, for the game rating—rated T for Teens in the US, so keep it "T-level," got it?
[Emperor only chuckles mysteriously in response.]
Terra: But what about the stalemate? Don't the rules of the tournament say anything about that?
Tet-chan: [scratches his head] Well… to be honest, we hadn't thought to set a time limit. We just kind of figured gathering up a big bunch of villains and heroes, forcing you all to spend an entire night in a compulsory truce and then letting you loose on each other the next morning would result in some terrifically vicious and decisive battles, so, uh… I guess we're kind of stuck?
Terra: But… But we can't just keep standing out here all day!
Tet-chan: Certainly not! We've got several more events planned for today! [clears his throat and turns to the villain] Now, look, Emperor, I know mental manipulation and seduction are kind of specialties of yours and it would almost go against principle for you not to try to charm and harass any hero that crosses your path, but we really don't have time for your games right now. [taps his wristwatch] We're on a schedule, and the schedule must be adhered to!
Emperor: [languidly] A shame you're not so strict with your release schedule…
Tet-chan: What?!
Emperor: But my dear Tet-chan, who said this was any kind of a game? [stands regally and dispels his barrier with a wave of a hand] You wrong the lady in assuming that my enraptured entreaties to her are not wrought most sincerely by the power of her own charms.
Tet-chan: It's not her charms I doubt—it's the imperviousness of your cold, narcissistic heart.
[Emperor ignores his comment and approaches Terra (who has also dispelled her barrier). Lowering himself gracefully to one knee before her, he takes her hand and kisses it lightly.]
Emperor: [gazing soulfully up at her] You have conquered me, my lady. I yield to you.
Terra: H-huh?!
Tet-chan: [gaping] So… it's Terra's victory?
Terra: [flushing] Oh, goodness, no! I-I barely did anything to deserve… [trails off, caught in Emperor's hypnotically intense golden gaze]
Emperor: [smooth as silk] You underestimate your power, my lady. The beauty of your eyes alone is enough to slay any heart. The victory is yours.
Terra: N-no, I… [manages to pull her gaze away and turns to Tet-chan] It's a draw, then.
Tet-chan: [nods dumbly] Well, okay, if you say so. [into headset] Did you copy that? Battle 10 is a draw, no victories.
Emperor: [straightening and drawing closer to Terra] My lady… that was unspeakably generous of you. I tell you, if you had drawn your sword and pierced my heart with it, I could not have protested in that moment.
Terra: P-please, don't say such things…! W-we're enemies…
Emperor: [lifting her chin delicately to face him] Forgive me for distressing you, gentle lady, but I cannot help myself. Love knows no lines of nation, creed or demarcation… [pulls her hand up to press it lingeringly against his lips; Terra's face turns many shades redder but she is enchanted despite herself.] Please, my goddess, take mercy on a poor, be-smitten heart and say you'll dine with me tonight…?
Terra: I… I… [letting go of her misgivings at last] I would be delighted.
Tet-chan: T-Terra, maybe that's not such a—
[He cuts off as Emperor shoots him a dazzling and somehow chilling smile.]
Emperor: Thank you for your help, Tet-chan. We'll see ourselves back to headquarters. [turning back to Terra with a dashing smile, he offers his arm] My dear?
[Tet-chan watches them walk off under the lowering sky, his expression a bit uneasy.]
Tet-chan: [trying to reassure himself] Well, Terra can take care of herself, after all… And anyway, what harm could there be in it? One week, and we're whisking them all back to their respective worlds anyway. I mean, how much trouble could the villains cause in a measly week, after all…?
[The ominous rumble of thunder in the distance is his only reply.]
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Well, that's it for this time, folks. If you enjoyed any of the battles, please review and let me know what you liked, what you weren't so hot on, WHO YOU WANT TO SEE MORE OF (lots of plotlines running around, so let me know which ones need more screentime! ;-D). Thank you again for reading!!
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Next time—
Chapter 5: Regroup & Re-shoot?