Wnats vs. Needs

Sam Tyler's not stupid.

Of course he's noticed the signs, all the little looks, the touches, the high-voltage charm. He knows he's meant to notice.

He wants it, yeah, he wants it all, the heat and that great golden body (might drive the dreams away), the charm and charisma all focused on him. He wants the teasing (just in fun, Sam) and the push-pull-thrill excitement, because his life's so shitty now and he's oh, so alone.

But he's not stupid and he's been a copper too long.

He's seen the smashed bodies and the broken lives and the mindfucks and worse. And he's seen the men who do those things; men who use charm as bait and trap in one, use violence like a drug (such a rush) and the drink as their excuse (I was drunk, of course it's not my fault!)

And he knows the difference between wanting and needing, does Sam; his old life is so close he can almost touch it, almost see it, but never can; and yet he's still managing to function (yeah, even alone) here at the bottom of the rabbit-hole.

Sam Tyler's not stupid.

And he wants.

But he doesn't need.

END

(Cross-posted to lifein1973 at Livejournal)