DISCLAMER: HUNTER X HUNTER AND ITS CHARACTERS ARE NOT MINE.

I revoke my vow! Yey! I want to write yaoi for now so please forgive me, ne? Uh, must be the influence of the songs I listen to. Notice that the speaker was changed to first person singular. I do love the POV style so I'll switch on it for a while, okai? Forgive me for the inconvenience, ne…

Gawsh! I'm a very bad translator! Gomen da sai...I hope you still understand the song despite my errors. Lol.

I really love Fei. He's so sadistic. Gomen da sai for the OOC Hiso-chan here. Its because I can't imagine his face here as Hiso-chan but Ikuta Toma. Forgive me, ne..? lol.

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Feitan POV

We were sitting so quietly on the clean wooden floor of his apartment. Was it really his or what? Chucks. How the hell would I know? I munched on the lobster he bought. That was good. The taste of the viand helped me soothe my anger anyway. I would have to thank him for it. I grabbed a glass of water and gulped it off. "How much do I owe?" I asked.

He looked at me. "No, my dear. You don't have to pay me. Really," he said in his most believable tone. But I did not believe him alright. I have always known that this orange-haired man is the craftiest being on earth. Most craftiest? Hm, no. That's wrong grammar. Well, was that wrong? Hell, I don't care.

I looked back at him. Hell, he was gorgeous. Really damn gorgeous. I could have been charmed by him. But he wasn't a virgin. What a pity. "Oh, well, if you won't accept my money, then consider it stolen." I stood up to leave but he grabbed my hand. "Let me go," I said.

"Hey, come on. I told you we need to talk, right?" he said. Well, this Hisoka guy wasn't really gentle but I couldn't understand why he treats me like...like...someone...special..? "Come on. Ah, yeah, I know. This conversation will be your payment for the dinner."

"I might as well as slap you, idiot. Take it," I said dodging three hundred-zeni bills on his face. But he dodged it back.

"Oh come on, dear. I'm not accepting any fees for my kindness."

"Really?" I said with a nod. "Okay. Bye." I tried to stand but he gripped my hands again.

"Oi, Fei-chan. Why do you hate me?" he asked. I sensed something on his voice. I found it pitiful. Pathetic. Well, if he needs me to end his misery, I might as well as kill him. That's my expertise.

"I never said anything like that."

"Then why do you want me to let you go?"

"Because you're an idiot," I replied. I felt a sense of remorse for what I said. Oh, well, why the hell would I take it back? This guy's crazy. Somehow, I found his craziness amusing. Entertaining perhaps? I smiled. "Can I go now?"

"No, no, no! Not yet! Can I ask you something?" he said.

"Sure," I replied playing along with his childish words.

"Really?" he said so crazily that I wanted to strike him.

"Yeah," I replied.

He cupped my face gently in his palms. I closed my eyes. Heck. What the hell are you trying to do? "Ne, Fei-chan, open your eyes." he said softly. I obeyed. "What do you see now?" he asked.

"I see you," I answered. What else would I see? His hands won't let me see anything else except him. Ah, no. "I also see the floor at the bottom, the ceiling at the top, the walls, and, and, nothing else," I said out to him.

"Which one is at the center?" he asked.

"You, what else," I replied rather annoyed. "Yo, what the hell do you want from me?" I asked.

He smiled at my frankness. "You," he replied.

"You want me to what? Kill you?" I asked. I knew I couldn't waste time anymore, I need to get back to our hideout. He stared at me quite amused or something. "What?"

"Well, I-" he said. Then he sighed. I wonder why he did. Oh, come on, Feitan. Why be bothered by this silly guy? Just play along. "Fei-chan, do you hate me?"

"No."

"Do you like me?"

"No."

"Can you be my friend?"

"Hell, no! What do you really want from me?" I said, my voice raising. "I don't have much time to spare, yo!"

"I...I...I..."

"What?!" His eyes looked watery. Oh heavens! Hisoka is crying? What miracle! I never saw him show his weak side. I never did. Ah, I think these seeming tears were a part of his joke. I rolled my eyes. "Don't joke with me, idiot. Tell me what you want and I'll answer you as fast as I can. Come on!"

His eyes looked at the floor. Hell! The tears were genuine! They were falling from his eyes like rain from the clouds forgotten by the sun. I smiled. Poor soul. I wouldn't console him, of course. I was quite amused by his suffering. I wanted to set my eyes upon the brokenness of his heart. Could he possibly suffer more? "Hisoka," I said, gently this time. "Why the hell are you crying like that?"

He looked at me at last. "Well, I...I really like you..."

His words got me surprised. "Come again?"

"Suki desu," he said. "I like you. And I think...I think...I love you."

I got surprised all the more. Why, his answer was so unexpected of him. I looked at his eyes still brimming with tears. Is this really true? Or a crazy drama? Or a crazy joke? Or he's just crazy?

"Hisoka," I said at last. "I think you have gone insane. Have you visited your regular psychiatrist?" I asked. I knew I insulted him. But he knew very well that I am Feitan and I am famous for my sadistic nature. He shouldn't expect me to show even the slightest mercy.

He wiped his tears. "Yes, I think I have gone mad. And I'm too ashamed to go to a psychiatrist, you know. Can you be my psychiatrist for now?"

"Well...I don't have a degree in Psychology and I am problematic with myself. Why go to me?" I asked. "I guess I'm not helping you. I'm leaving." I turned my back to go but he stopped me again.

"Please...don't leave me tonight," he said. "I..."

"Gotcha," I said with a smile. "One night stand. I get it. Gomen de. I only go for virgins." I tried to stand once more but he won't let me. "Hey, yo, I need to go." I pulled my hands away and stood up. He stood up too and wrapped me with his arms.

"Please..." he said still crying like a helpless baby. Oh my... Cry as you like, my dear. Please suffer. I love to see you like that. He hugged me tighter. "I may not be a virgin but I promise I'd make you happy."

"You promise, huh?" I asked releasing myself from his embrace.

"Yes, I promise. I love you."

"Can you say it again?"

"I love you."

"Again?"

"I love you."

"Again?"

"I love you."

"Again?"

"I love you."

I laughed. "You're crazy."

"I'm good at that, you know," he offered.

"Thanks but no thanks. I go only with virgins."

"Come on, I really love you," he said.

"Hmm...you love me so much?" I asked.

"Yes. I love you so much."

I laughed all the more looking at his pained expression. I sat back on the floor. He sat with me. My gosh. He's one determined guy. "What if I tell you to kill yourself?" I asked. That was one foolish challenge but I was just testing his stupidity. The more he says yes, the more he humiliates himself, the more he suffers, the more I love it. "Hm?"

"I'd kill myself if you want me to," he answered.

"No. You don't have to die, dear. Get a card instead and cut yourself. Be careful," I said. He obeyed. I smiled all the more as I saw the beautiful crimson liquid gushing out of his fair smooth skin. "Hmm..that's good. Can you do a nice cut on your neck?" I asked.

"Yes, if that's what you want," he said.

I smiled. Tables turned. I thought he was one tough player. He got me angry at the restaurant. Did he insult me? Indirectly, yes. He made me angry. Humiliated? Partly, yes. Now he's the one suffering. The wounds on his body won't hurt a lot. But the wounds of the heart won't be healed that easily. I hope I wounded his heart. I want him to suffer. Suffer. Till he dies.

Another river of blood flowed out of him. "That's better," I said. "You can have me now." He smiled, his face lit up like a child's. "But, I'm not in the mood. Turn me on, please."

;D

DISCLAIMER: THIS SONG IS NOT MINE. IT BELONGS TO RIVERMAYA.

Hisoka POV

I knew I looked like one crazy madman dancing naked with that crazy music. But I can't help it. If this is the only way I could have him, then I'd do it. I'd do everything I could to make him mine. I looked like one hired stripper I bet. But let all humiliations disappear. I love him, that's all I know.

"Keep on dancing, dear," he said quite amused. He was still there sitting squatted on the floor twirling his fingers on my clothes. His black hadnkerchief was just there tied on his neck revealing the fairness of his skin more efficiently. He was beautiful. So beautiful that I want to crush him like hell. But I knew I couldn't crush him on the battlefield. My desire was to crush him in bed. And in order to do that, I have to dance like an idiot.

Malapit na akong matunaw (I'm almost completely melted)... Sa init ng iyong ulo (By that heat inside your head)... Muntikan pa 'kong masugatan (I almost got myself wounded)... Sa talas ng pagtitig mo (By the sharpness of your gaze)...

"That's good..." he said. Ah... His voice was too seductive I couldn't resist it at all. Maybe I was destined to suffer. To follow his command. "Dance more, Hiso-kun," he said. I obeyed. "That's good..." he said playing on my clothes with his fingertips. Oh dear... Why the hell do I always follow him? Hay... What other reason do I have except my foolish love for him?

Pumapangit ka na naman (You're getting ugly now)... Easy, nakakahawa 'yan (Easy, that's contagious)... Ako'y nakikiusap lang (I'm just begging you)...

I went on. Dancing like hell. I heard him laugh so gently. He flared me up. I can't take it anymore. I rushed towards him like one attacking lunatic. He was lying now on the floor with me on top. Oh gosh... I just can't take it at all. I'm too aroused to dance again. "Fei-chan, please don't make me suffer like this. I really want you now..." I couldn't help but release the tears flowing from my eyes.

He caressed my face and smiled. "Why shouldn't I make you suffer?" he asked in a faint whisper which aroused me all the more.

"Because..." I said closing my eyes. "Because I love you."

'Wag na init ulo, baby (Don't be so hot-headed, baby).... Dinggin mo please payong ito (Please listen to me)... Inom tubig, nood ng TV (Drink water, watch TV)... Gaan bigla problema mo (Your problems will surely be gone)...

I love him. I love him. That's the main reason why I desire for him like there's no other man in the world. I caught a glimpse of him. His eyes glistening like a pair of golden marbles. How I love him. I love him. I opened my eyes and bent to kiss his lips. He averted his head. My lips landed on his cheek.

"Hm, Fei-chan. Why won't you let me?" I asked.

He faced me again. "Because you're not a virgin." Then he stood up and went to the door leaving me speechless. What?! "Ahm, before I forget..." He threw the three hunred-zeni bills on the floor. "Thanks for the food. And..." he said dropping another bill, "thanks for the dance. You're good."

And he was gone. I...have...never...been...so...humiliated...like...that...in...my...entire...life... Humiliated. So humiliated. Hurt. Trampled upon. I thought he was a fair gamer. It turned out that...he was just amusing himself. Entertaining himself. While killing my dignity.

The tears on my eyes fell all the more. It was the very first time I got rejected because of flimsy reasons. I yelled as loud as I could. How could fate be so cruel..? Why do I have to be rejected by the only one I love? Does it mean that I need to atone for my past sins? I yelled again. I grabbed my mp3 and tore it to pieces.

Feitan...you'll regret this for the rest of your life...