Can't Watch You Go

SasuSaku Oneshot

"Talking"

Thoughts

Flashback

Sakura's P.O.V.

I laid on my bed in my lonesome apartment, taking a break from packing long enough to think about today.

"Tsunade-sama?" came a 19-year-old kunochi, eyes puffy and body shaking.

"Sakura! What's wrong?" asked the blonde Hokage, concernly.

"I need a mission." I whispered. "I need a mission that's out of the village. One that intense and involes a lot of fighting, please."

"Don't tell me. HE did this again?"

All I could do was nod.

"Hm, let me see. There is one in Otogakure...but that's a yea-" I cut Tsunade-sama off before she could continue on.

"I'll take it."

"But Sak-"

"Please..." I begged my mentor with pleading eyes that were blocked by pain and tears. "Please, shishou. I need to get away. Just for a little while. Please."

Tsunade sighed before handing me the scroll. "Arigato, shishou." I thanked before dashed out of the Hokage tower.

"Please, be careful, Sakura..." the Hokage whispered.

I sighed, running a slightly shaky hand through my short pick locks, staring down at the ground. What was I to expect? Have an actual reason to stay? There nothing left for me here; no hope, no dreams, just empty promises and wasted years. I smiled sadistically, shaking the memory out of my head and rose from my bed, continuing with my packing. I glanced around my slowly emptied room. These walls have witnessing enough; they're practically bleeding with all the pain they've seen. Imagine what I had to go through. I won't be missed. I guarantee that.

Sasuke's P.O.V.

SMASH!

I slammed my fist into my bathroom mirror. The blood from my knuckles stained my pale hand, but I didn't care. I let the crimson liquid seep painfully out of my skin, dripping onto the floor. Was this supposed to be pain? It's a pathetic excuse for it, because it doesn't NEARLY compare to the ripping sensation within me. I looked at myself in the broken mirror. I had slightly darkened circles forming under my eyes from the lack of sleep. How could I? When all last night, certain pink-haired kunochi plagued my thoughts! It's like these memories are mocking me, haunting me for my ignorance. My stupid, fucked up ignorance that dug me deeper into this hole than I already was.

I'm an ass. No, that would be an understatement. Haruno Sakura...Fuck, did I miss up. I was a jerk to her, again. She's everything: the one that stood out amongst everyone, the one that believed in me once everyone gave up, the one that kept trying to listen to me, the one that was always there for me, the one that genuinely cared when all the others were just trying, the one gave me everything and didn't ever dare to ask for anything to in return. The ONLY one I ever cared about, and the ONLY one I will ever love.

Yeah, I fell in love with her. But I was just blocked by revenge and anger to notice that. What do I do instead? I FUCKING LEFT HER! I left her behind, when I could've stayed. She offered me the entire world and I threw it back in her face, all for chasing one mere goal. A goal that costed me my entire life. I slammed my fist into the wall before walking off into my room and sitting on my bed with my head in my hands, gripping my spiked raven locks in my hair angrily.

Today, she came up to me with that smile of hers. The smile I can never get out of my head. Honestly, I didn't know that would be the last time I would see that smile. I shouldn't have expected her to stay, I shouldn't even expect to her to even look at me. But she still did, and I still don't deserve it.

"Hey Sasuke-kun!" chirped Sakura as she ran up to me as I walked along the busy streets of Konoha.

"Hn."

"Ano Sasuke-kun, is everything ok?" she asked as she looked up at me, I was about a head taller then her. Those eyes….

"None of your business." I spat out, glaring at her.

"What the- I was just asking. Kami Sasuke-kun, I was just trying to help."

"SHUT UP!" I shouted, stopping in my tracks and glaring at her.

"Wha-"

"You're so annoying! Can't you see I don't want you near me? You're so dense that you can't see that." With that I walked away, leaving Sakura standing there with tears spilling out of her emerald orbs.

"FUCK!" I shouted. How could I be so stupid! I just turn her away every freaking' time...I have to find her. I have to. I quickly grabbed my jacket and slipped on my shoes before dashing out the Uchiha district and toward Sakura's house.

When I got to her apartment, I was about to knock on the door when I saw a note, addressed to me... I swiped it off and read the contents. My eyes widen as I saw what she wrote.

Sasuke-kun,

If you're reading this, I'm probably half-way to the Sound village by now. I took this year long mission just to get away. I needed to get away from this village, for my own reasons. But I wanted to say, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to annoy you all the time it's just...I care. I care for you, Sasuke-kun.

I glared at the note. How can she still care after all I've done to her?

I know you hate me...You probably don't even want to finished reading this note. Heh, I don't know what I've done to make you this angerly but I'm sorry. I'll be back to Konoha soon, hopefully we can be friends. I at least want to be friends...just so you know I'm here. You're probably wondering what the mission is... I'll tell you later. But...there is a catch to the mission...

My eyes widen. A...a catch?

Since you didn't kill off Orochimaru...he'll probably kill me. He knows who I am but...for the sake of Konoha I must continue this mission. My mission? I have to capture the Akatsuki member that Orochimaru has hostage. That member is a spy for Konoha also and we can't risk our information getting out. I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun. But I also want you to know...

I still love you.

-Haruno Sakura.

My eyes widen as I dropped the note and dashed to Konoha gates. Hoping Sakura didn't leave. I sped that as fast as I can, not stopping for anything or anyone. I can't risk Sakura getting killed because of me. I can't bear to see her suffer even more. I…I can't just her go!

By the time I got to the gates, I saw Sakura standing there, waiting for the two Jonin to open the gates for her.

"SAKURA!" I called out to her. She turned around, eyes wide before narrowing. She turned her back and proceeded to leave Konoha. "SAKURA!" I ran to her as fast as I can. She didn't stop walking. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her into my warm embrace. And at that moment, it began to rain...hard. And at that moment, I didn't even care.

"Let me go, Sasuke." she spoke bluntly, no emotion backing up her words. They were just words. I winced, a slight tug at my heart at the dropping of suffix.

"No! I can't Sakura!" She continued to struggle but I just tightened my grip. "I can't just stay in Konoha and watch you get killed. Damn it Sakura, this is a suicide mission!" I yelled as her eyes widen, obviously taken aback by my sudden outburst. At this point, I couldn't hold it in.

"It's hard to believe your sudden change in attitude, Sasuke."

"Please believe me."

"WHY DO YOU CARE ALL OF A SUDDEN?" she snapped, breaking from my hold and glaring at me. "Why do you suddenly care that I'm about to leave and I could die! I meant nothing to you now so why do I matter now?"

"Because I love you!" And there was the truth rearing it's horrible fate.

"No you don't...You never did and never will." she said calmly…I took away that smile…that slight happiness in her voice…now I need to give it back.

"KAMI SAKURA! How can I make you believe me!"

"You can't...not any more." She turned her back to me, about to leave when I grasped her wrist, spinning her around and slamming my lips onto hers. I kissed her, pouring everything I possibly can out into that kiss. She needed to know, I needed her to know. I'm tired of sitting back and watching everything important in my life walk away from me. I don't even deserve this right now, but call me selfish I guess. Yes, I'm selfish. I'm trying to keep the purest, most amazing angel to myself. But I don't regret a thing.

"Sasuke...kun." I smiled slightly at the return of the suffix. But more importantly, I smiled: something only Haruno Sakura could make me do. Her and only her.

"Please...don't." I whispered, hugging her.

"...I..." I looked down at her. I was shocked when I saw that smile on her face. The one that lit up all of Konoha in the darkest hours, "...I believe you."