Disclaimer: I don't own anything associated with Twilight

Authors note: finally, the last chapter! Thank you to all who reviewed! I didn't think you would like this story so much and I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter. There is a lemon in this chapter so be warned!

I'm also sorry it took so long to update but I've been busy for the past couple of days so I haven't been able to update. I won't update any of my stories tomorrow, I don't think, because I have work…enjoy!

To love or not to love?

Edward's POV

Outside the club, I haled a taxi and opened the door, gently sliding a giggling Bella in before climbing in myself. I quickly told the driver the address of our apartment and the taxi pulled away from the curb, joining the few cars littering the roads at this early hour of the morning.

Alice's words kept repeating themselves over in my head and I brushed them aside. She can't have been serious, right? I mean, Bella was sitting beside me, giggling every time a car passed the window. Surely she would stay like this the rest of the night. At least I hoped she would. A silly Bella is definitely better than a horny Bella. Especially because I doubt I would be able to control myself around her if she was the latter. She was drunk and there was no way I was going to take advantage of her, no matter how much I wanted her.

Bella stopped giggling and I looked down at her, thinking that maybe she could be asleep. At least that would relieve me of this predicament I was in but, alas, she was staring up at me with her warm, chocolate brown eyes. A small smile lifted the corners of her lips and I smiled back, somewhat suspicious of her. Maybe Alice was right; maybe she could have suddenly gone from childish and innocent one moment to seducing and horny the next.

Just as that thought crossed my mind I felt Bella's small, warm hand on my thigh, sliding slowly up it towards my growing arousal. I jumped in surprise at the contact but so say I didn't enjoy it would be lying. I place my hand on top of Bella's, stopping its movement as it came dangerously close to my crotch.

I looked up from my leg where both our hands remained and into Bella's lust-filled eyes, a small overly-innocent smile on her lips, just as she crashed her lips against mine, kissing me fiercely. I sat there, stunned for a few moments before returning her kiss, revelling in the feel of her soft lips against mine. Her hand that wasn't still resting on my thigh tangled into my hair, holding my head still as she continued to kiss me. She forced her tongue into my mouth, her warm breath following.

The taste of the alcohol in her breath reminded me of the situation and I, somewhat reluctantly, broke away from the kiss, turning my head to the side as Bella began to place warm, wet kisses along my cheek and neck.

"Bella." I said warningly and pushed her away from me slightly just as I noticed the taxi had come to a stop in front of our apartment building.

"Edward." She said, mirroring my tone accurately and burst into a fit of giggles.

I sighed, running a hand through my hair as I stepped out of the car, holding my hand out to a still giggling Bella. I paid the driver and began to walk into the building with my arm around Bella's waist as she was a bit unsteady on her feet.

"Edward…it's dark." Bella giggled, looking around her into the night. I rolled my eyes at her obvious statement but found the excitement in her eyes endearing as she tilted her head back and looked up at the night sky, nearly falling backwards in the process. I steadied her and held the door open for us to walk through, letting it swing shut behind us.

I pushed the button for the elevator when we approached it and stepped inside when the doors opened. I pushed the button for Bella's floor which lit up as the doors slid closed.

Bella stared at the lit button in wonder as a smile spread across her face. "Look, Edward." She said, pointing at the glowing button. "It's so pretty. Let's make all of them light up!" She said excitedly and reached towards the panel of buttons.

I grabbed her outstretched arm and pulled her away from the panel beside the doors. I knew what would happen if she got her way and I didn't want to ride up in the elevator with the doors opening at ever floor. "No, Bella." I said firmly as she pouted up at me, her brow furrowed in annoyance.

We stayed in silence for a few moments before Bella turned towards me, wiggling her finger at me as she gestured for me to come closer to her. I looked at her suspiciously but lowered my head down to her nonetheless.

"Edward…" She whispered in my ear, her warm breath fanning across my cheek. "I need a wee-wee." She mumbled as a bright blush spread across her cheeks as she bowed her head.

I chuckled slightly and sighed. At least she hadn't tried to attack me again. "Don't worry, Bella. We're almost there." I said softly and the doors opened right then. I stepped out and Bella stumbled into the corridor behind me before dancing from one leg to another. I guess she was more desperate for the toilet than I had thought.

I began walking along the corridor with Bella's hand in mine as she tried to walk and continue her toilet dance which failed as she tripped over her feet and began falling towards the ground. I wrapped her arms around her waist, preventing her from hitting the ground. I have perfected my reflexes after all the years of knowing Bella, it comes with the territory.

I scooped her up in my arms, carrying her bridal style to the door of her apartment. "Bella, do you have the keys?"

She frowned and wiggled slightly in my arms, almost causing me to drop her as she tried to reach the back pocket of her jeans. She pulled them out with a flourish and a large grin spread across her face as she jingled them at me. "Ta-da!" She said, giggling.

After a bit of struggling I managed to balance Bella in one arm, awkwardly leaning her against the wall beside the door with one arm wrapped around her. I knew it would have been much easier to let her stand but in all honestly I didn't want to let go of her, the heat radiating from her body felt too nice to be separated, even for a few moments. I fiddled with the keys in the lock for a few seconds before successfully opening the door. I walked through the door, holding Bella bridal style once more and kicked the door shut behind us.

I walked into Bella's bedroom to her en-suite bathroom and placed her down carefully just in front of the door. "Thank you, Edward. You should carry me more often." She said with a small smile and patted my arm. I gave her a questioning look as she walked into the bathroom but turned to face me just as she was about to close the door. "Don't go anywhere." She said sternly, pointing her finger at me before closing the door behind her.

I sighed and walked away from the bathroom door. Should I stay like she asked, or should I go now? After her little attack in the taxi I wasn't sure what she might do or how I might react. But I knew that I should wait here, at least until she comes out of the bathroom. Knowing her and her clumsiness she would probably manage to trip over nothing and hit her head on the bath tub or something.

I walked the opposite side of the room from that en-suit and scanned my eyes across the large bookcase that took up most of the wall. I noticed quite a few titles that Bella had mentioned were her favourite which seemed worse for wear. I remember Bella telling me that she kept her books in here so she would be able to easily get one to read before bed and so they were protected from Alice who had frequently ruined many of Bella's books by using them as coaters for her drinks.

I realised that this was the first time I had ever been in Bella's bedroom, although I had wished to be here many times, and I looked around the room, smiling at the distinctly 'Bella' style. Her large double bed was in the centre of the room, opposite the door to the bed room and was decorated with a mid-night blue cover decorated with silver swirls and just above the bed was a large window with dark blue curtains. On one side of the room, where I was now standing, was the large book case and on the other side, beside the en-suite door was a small closet and a chest of drawers that had a small stereo sitting on top with a few C.D's scattered beside it along with other small objects.

I crossed to the other side of the room, glancing at the small collection of C.D's she had and smiled as I recognised a few of them. My eyes travelled to the other side of the chest of drawers and studied the photographs that sat there; Bella as a child, standing beside what I assumed to be her mother and father, and the other, much to my surprise, was of me and Bella just after we had all had a water fight in the park much to Alice's insistence.

I must have been too absorbed in my thoughts at that point to here the opening of the bathroom door, or the sound of Bella's soft footsteps towards me. But what I was aware of was when Bella's small hand reached out to touch my shoulder, causing me to jump slightly and turn quickly towards her.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I wasn't snooping. It's just that…" I apologised quickly but trailed off when I saw the smile on her face. The same overly-innocent smile she had right before she jumped me in the taxi. Oh, shit.

Bella began taking small steps towards me, her brown eyes filled with lust just as they had been before. I cautiously backed away every time she advanced on me, trying not to be forced into the same situation as before. No matter how much I had enjoyed kissing her, she was drunk and it wasn't right to take advantage of her even if she was the one initiating it. I realised I had fallen right into her trap when my knees hit the edge of her bed.

I barely had time to react when Bella lunged at me, pushing us both onto her bed (me on my back and her lying on top of my chest), pressing her lips firmly to mine. She moved slightly so she was straddling my waist, rubbing her ass against my ever hardening erection, and forced her tongue into my mouth as she kissed me furiously.

I couldn't even pull my head back from the kiss because the bed was right behind me and there was practically no space at all between Bella and me. I placed my hands on her shoulders, giving them a firm push to put some space between us but only managing to create a few inches of space.

Bella pouted, pushing against my arms as she tried to kiss me again. She scowled at me in annoyance I thought that she just might give in and admit defeat. But what she did was the opposite of what I had expected. She grabbed my wrists and pinned my arms either side of my head before crashing her lips against mine. Damn, she was strong.

She ground her hips into mine and forced her tongue into my mouth as I tried desperately not to respond which is no easy task considering the woman that I love, the girl of my dreams was straddling me and kissing me with all she was worth, like I said; not easy to deny that.

I tried tugging my wrists free but it was difficult because of the awkward position Bella held them in and because of her sudden, unexpected strength. Bella removed her hand from my left arm began tugging furiously at my t-shirt, tugging it up with just one hand. I shivered in pleasure at the feeling of Bella's warm hands on my chest and stomach but shoved her shoulders with my now free hand. She groaned in annoyance. "Edward, stay still." She demanded, shoving my arm away and rocking her hips against mine as I clenched my jaw to stop myself moaning at the delicious friction.

She returned her lips to mine, her tongue exploring my mouth and moved both her hands, sliding them down my chest until they came to the waist of my jeans. I froze. This had to stop. I could not and would not take advantage of Bella while she was drunk. I loved her too much to do that.

I grasped her wrists firmly in my hands, stopping her movement and turned my head to the side. Bella chose to ignore that and began trailing hot, open-mouth kisses down my neck.

"Bella, stop. I can't do this. We can't do this." I said softly. She tensed and moved off me as I released my hold on her arms. I sat up as she kneeled beside me, her hands on her lap and her head down so her face was hidden by her hair.

I heard her quiet sniffles and knew she was crying. My heart panged at the thought that I had made her cry but I had to. I couldn't have let the situation continue any further. I reached my hand out to her shoulder but she flinched away from my touch and that movement pained me more than I would like to admit.

"Bella, darling, don't cry." I said softly and moved slightly closer to her but didn't try and touch her again, to afraid that she would flinch away once more.

"I can't…help it." She said, her voice breaking because she was crying and looked up at me with a tear-stained face. "You…you don't want me." She dropped her head again and sobbed harder.

I gathered her into my arms, refusing to let her pull away, and sat her on my lap as she cried into my chest. How wrong she was. I wanted her more than she could possibly know. "Bella," I said softly into her hair, breathing her sweet scent. "I do want you, so much. But not now. You're drunk; you don't know what you're saying." I said, stroking her hair gently. A part of me hoped against hope that she was acting like this because this is what she felt deep down, but I doubted that. Why would some like her ever want some like me?

"I do know what I'm talking about, Edward." She said stubbornly and lifted her head up to lock her gaze on mine. "I want you. And I am not drunk." She said defiantly then looked thoughtful for a second. "Well, not much."

I chuckled and rolled my eyes at her. "Of course not." I said sarcastically. "Bella, I think it's time you went to bed now." I said as she nodded. I shifted on the bed, moving her to the top end and climbed off it.

Bella frowned as she looked around her bed. "Edward, could you get me some pyjama's please?" She looked up at me with her glorious brown eyes and I was powerless to say no.

I nodded and walked over to her chest of drawers. "Which drawer?" I asked and looked up at her over my shoulder.

She frowned, seemingly deep in thought. "The first one, I think…" she trailed off and I reached for the handle of the top drawer. "Or maybe it was the second one…" She said as I opened the top drawer and shut it quickly. Her underwear drawer.

"Definitely the second one." I muttered, flustered at what I had just seen and I couldn't stop myself from imagining Bella in them. I pulled out a dark blue tank top and matching pyjama bottoms before walking back over to Bella.

I handed them over to her and was just about to turn and leave when she immediately pulled her shirt over her head, revealing a bright red bra which contrasted with her pale skin perfectly. I stood there frozen, staring at the sight in front of me that challenged my self-control to the extreme.

I was broken out of my blatant ogling when Bella spoke. "Edward, a little help." She huffed and wiggled slightly. I blinked a couple of times and a small smile tugged at the corners of my lips. Bella had somehow managed to get her tank top stuck with her right arm and head in the right arm hole and her left arm in the head hole.

I chuckled and walked over to her, gently helping her put her head and left arm in the proper places, making sure not to touch anything other than her arms and thankful that her chest was covered by the top.

"Thank you." She said, slightly irritated then immediately tugged off her jeans before I could step away. I turned quickly but not before I caught a glimpse of a bright red thong that matched her bra perfectly. Bella Swan was trying to kill me.

I concentrated on making sure that I actually breathed and maintaining my control. "Edward?" Bella's soft voice floated to my ears and she placed a hand on my shoulder, turning me towards her. She bowed her head and a blush splashed across her cheeks. "Em, I was wondering if you…if you could stay?" She said shyly and looked up at me from beneath her eye lashes. "It's just that, well, Alice isn't here and I don't like being on my own." She trailed off in a whisper.

"Bella…" I hesitated. Should I stay? But, on the other hand, how could I leave?

"Please, Edward." She whispered as tears gathered in her eyes.

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. How could I say no to her? I flashed her my crooked smile and nodded. "Alright, I'll stay."

She gave me a wide smile and hugged me tightly. She pulled back, excitement radiating from her. "I'll be right back. I'll just go get you some sweats to sleep in, ok? I think Alice has some in her room."

"Alice has men's sweats in her room?" I questioned and then my thoughts turned to Jasper. Disgusting. I shuddered. Apparently Bella noticed the repulsed look on my face and laughed. Her laughter reminded me of bells; pure and beautiful.

"Don't worry. She bought some for Jasper and decided that she didn't like them any more. They're still in the bag at the bottom of her wardrobe." She said quickly. "I'll be back in a moment." She sang and skipped out the room.

Bella's mood swings were beginning to take me off balance and I'm not sure how well I would cope if she tried attacking me again. She was back a second later, breaking my line of thought as she skipped into the room and handed me a pair of black sweats.

"There you go, Edward. Now you need to get dressed." She said and immediately tugged my shirt over my head before her hands went for my pants. Again.

I stood shocked for a few seconds before stepping away from her. "Maybe I should dress myself, Bella?" I suggested and she shrugged. She turned and jumped on the bed before scrambling under the covers, tucking them under her chin and giving me an innocent smile.

I went into her bath room, changed quickly and walked back out to see Bella sitting on the bed and staring straight at me. I blushed under her intense gaze and walked towards the door that lead to the corridor of the apartment, planning on sleeping on the couch.

"E—Edward? Where are you going?" Bella asked desperately and I turned to look at her just as I reached the door.

"I was just going to go sleep on the couch."

"Please, stay here with me?" She asked softly and pulled back the covers on the side of the bed closest to me. "I don't want you to leave me." She whispered, her doe-eyes wide and pleading.

"I'm not going to leave you, Bella." I said as I took a few steps towards her. She looked so helpless sitting there on her large bed and I felt the need to protect her. Even though, if she got another mood swing it would be me who would need protecting.

"Please?" She asked as tears filled her eyes.

"Alright." I said as I walked over to her. I would do anything to stop her crying, to stop her from being afraid or hurt.

I slipped under the covers and Bella immediately curled into my side, resting her head on my chest as I wrapped my arm around her waist. It felt so right; lying with her, her warm body pressed against mine.

"Night-night, Edward." She murmured against my chest, placing a soft kiss on it before she drifted off to sleep.

"Good night, Bella, my love." I whispered into her hair and felt sleep consuming me.

-------------------------------

My eye lids fluttered open to sunlight streaming through the curtains. I blinked my eyes a few times and looked down at Bella who was still curled into my side like she had been when we fell asleep, her brown hair spilling on to the pillow behind her.

I felt Bella's hand, which was resting on my bare stomach, begin to move south. Not again, I thought. Why is it that Bella only does these things when she's either drunk or asleep?

I placed my hand on top of hers as it slipped under the waist band of my sweats, causing my arousal to grow. Her warm breath fanned across my chest and she looked up at me, blinking away the sleep.

Her eyes widened as they travelled to my chest and I heard her sharp intake of breath before she wriggled slightly. She sighed in relief and a smile spread across her face, as well as a blush, as she looked up at me. I frowned slightly; did she really think I would take advantage of her like that?

"Morning, Edward."

"Good morning. How are you feeling? You drank quite a lot last night." I asked, concerned as I gently stroked her hair absentmindedly.

Her blush grew brighter and she shook her head slightly. "I'm fine. I don't get headaches or anything like that. Just the embarrassment of what I did when I was drunk." She mumbled. "I'm just going to brush my teeth, ok? My tongue feels a bit fuzzy. Then I want you to remind me of what I can't remember of last night. Which is pretty much everything." She said seriously.

I chuckled and nodded as she pulled away from me and walked quickly to the bathroom. I just lay there in Bella's bed, somewhere I never imagined I would wake up, and tried to decide what to tell her. Would I tell her everything that happened? Did I want to embarrass her that much? No, but I knew I couldn't lie to her.

I heard running water from the bath room as Bella brushed her teeth and in a few minutes she emerged, returning to my side and snuggling into my side which caused a huge grin to spread across my face.

"Edward…not that I'm complaining or anything but why do you have your shirt off?" She asked and her lips grazed my chest as she spoke then she lifted her head to look at me expectantly for an answer.

"Well, you sort of forced it off me." I smiled at her and a blush spread across her cheeks.

She groaned and dropped her head to my chest. "What else did I do?" She asked and sighed. "I don't remember much. Just going to the club, Alice and Jasper disappearing, we danced, didn't we?"

"Yes. What else do you remember?"

"Em, we left and Alice said she was going to stay at Jasper's but I don't remember much else, just snippets." She mumbled.

"Well, after we left the club we got a taxi and you kind of…attacked me." I finished and Bella buried her head into my chest.

"We got back here and into the lift. You said you needed the toilet." I felt Bella's cheeks heated up against my chest. "We came up to your apartment. You went to the toilet and then…well…"

"I didn't?" She gasped and covered her face with her hands. "I remember. I'm so sorry Edward. I didn't mean…well, I did…but I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable." Her voice was muffled by her hand and my chest.

I pressed my lips against her forehead and tightened my arm around her waist. "It's alright, Bella."

She pushed away from me slightly, propping herself up on her arm beside me and kept her eyes downcast. "Edward, I…I…I meant it when I said I want you." She said, barely audible and her cheeks were flaming.

I stared at her stunned before I brought my hand up and gently brushed her bright red cheek with the tips of my fingers. "Bella…" I said softly and I saw her bottom lip tremble slightly as she looked up at me. "I don't want you." A smile spread across my face. "I need you." I spoke truthfully and continued. "I love you." I whispered and dropped my hand, waiting for her answer. I could here my heart pounding in my ears and my breathing coming in short gasps as I waited. My heart fell as she just stared at me in shock. She didn't feel the same. How could I ever think she would?

I turned away from her onto my side in an attempt to hide the disappointment which must have been clear on my face. She didn't love me. How could I have been foolish enough to tell her? I had ruined our friendship now.

"Edward…" Bella said softly placing her hand on my shoulder and I rolled onto my back, staring up at the ceiling to avoid her gaze. "Edward, look at me." She placed her hand on the side of my face and turned it towards her. I couldn't hide the pain, the vulnerability that shone from my eyes. My eyes met her deep chocolate brown ones and I saw a small smile pull at the corners of her lips. "I love you too." She said, a dazzling smile spreading across her face.

My eyes scanned her face, searching for any trace that she wasn't telling the truth, that she just said that because she felt bad for me. But all I saw in her eyes was love. A huge smile spread across my face and Bella leaned closer to me, placing her lips against mine. This was different from her desperate kisses last night; it was full of the love and adoration that we felt for each other.

Our lips moved together in perfect time and I let my tongue trace her bottom lip, asking for entrance. She parted her lips slightly and I slipped my tongue into her mouth, massaging her tongue with my own.

Bella fisted her hands in my hair and I placed mine on her hips, my fingers splaying across the exposed flesh of her stomach and lower back. She moved her hands from my hair, trailing the down my chest and the warmth spread throughout my body at her touch. I slid my hands up the soft skin of her back, pulling her top up with it as our tongues continued fight for dominance.

I pulled her top over her head, only breaking the kiss for a second before returning my lips to hers. My hands reached around her back and unclasped her bra, causing it to slide down her arms and Bella threw it to her side.

I broke the kiss and gazed down at her perfect chest; her full, round breasts and pert pink nipples. I groaned and rolled us over, hovering over her and supporting my weight on my arms which were either side of her head.

I kissed her lips softly before trailing kisses down her neck, to her collar bone and continue on a path down to the swell of her breasts. "You're beautiful, my Bella." I mumbled against her skin. Her chest was rising and falling with her heavy breathing, making her all the more tempting.

I continued placing small butterfly kisses on her chest before taking one of her nipples into my mouth as my hand massaged her other breast. The wonderful sounds of her moans filled the air causing my member to harden almost painfully.

I moved my mouth to her other breast and massaged the first with my hand as her hands fisted into my hair, tugging slightly in the most delightful way. I moved to place kisses along her flat stomach to her navel then to the waist band of her pyjama bottoms. I looked up at her to see her head thrown back against the pillow as her chest continued to heave. I slipped my fingers under the waist band and tugged her pants down along with her bright red throng, pulling them off her feet and discarding them onto the floor.

I placed soft kisses on her ankle, slowly making my way up her inner leg as she writhed in pleasure. I placed a kiss on her inner thigh and looked up at her, teasing her. She groaned in frustration and pulled me up so my face was level with hers, kissing me passionately.

I felt her hands slowly travel down my back to my sweats and she slipped them down with my boxers as I kicked them off. Her fingers threaded in my hair as she held my face to her and my hands explored her body, memorising every curve.

"Edward…I need you." She whispered against my lips and I moved to position myself at her entrance, teasing her opening with the tip of my member. She moaned against my mouth and thrust her hips upwards, enveloping me in her warmth. I groaned and slid into her to the hilt, savouring how wonderful it felt to be inside of her.

She wiggled her hips and I pulled out before sliding back in. My thrusts were long and slow and soon the moans of our love making began to fill the room. All too soon I felt her inner walls clench around me and she fell over the edge, bringing me with her as we called each others names.

We lay there, breathing heavily for a few minutes before I pulled out of her and rolled onto my back pulling her with me and onto my chest. I buried my face in her hair, breathing in her scent as she placed soft kisses on my chest.

"I love you, Edward."

"I love you too, Bella." I said softly. The front door of the apartment banged shut loudly and we both jumped. I sat up quickly and Bella did the same, holding the sheet tightly to her chest as we heard foot steps approaching the room quickly.

"Bella, I was just wondering if—" Alice shoved the door open and stared at us as we looked back at her in the shock of being caught. Alice squealed and a grin spread across her face. "Finally!" She said happily and looked over her shoulder. "Jasper, come and have a look at this!" She shouted as my eyes widened. Could this get anymore embarrassing?

Jasper appeared in the door way and flinched before adverting his eyes. "Edward, I would appreciate it if you cover up. I'm happy for you and everything but I'd rather not see that particular part of your anatomy."

Apparently it could. I tugged the sheet up to my waist and looked at Bella whose face was bright red, as I'm sure mine must be.

"Sorry to interrupt." Alice said happily. "Carry on." She called as she shut the door and soon after I heard the front door shut too.

A/N: How was it? I'm really not sure…and I wasn't sure how to end it…I hoped you liked it and I would really appreciate your thoughts!

When I was writing I wrote 'in the most delightful way' which reminded me of Mary Poppins as soon as I wrote it and I got lost in a giggle fit…anyway….

Thanks for reading!