I stared at the dish in my hand, the pain in my heart throbbing, making it hard for me to breathe. I began to wash it slowly, knowing I have nothing better to do. My mind… or what is left of it started to wanderer. I scrubbed the plate in my hand and looked out the window, knowing that Jake was somewhere out there, probably worrying about me. I should say that he should not worry, that there is nothing to be concerned about, but truthfully, I myself can see how life is slowly draining out of me. Everyday hold less and less meaning for me…living means less to me.

Am I suicidal? Maybe. I love Charlie, I love Jake, I love Renee, but it's hard to love someone when your heart is in pieces. It's as if someone ties your hands and feet together and throws you into the ocean, demanding you to swim. Sometimes…you just can't because…you're not capable; I am not capable of living. Not without him.

But what am I to do? He doesn't love me. I mean, who would love me? I am worthless. He only gave me an illusion of love, an illusion I needed. I wanted to feel loved for once, to feel the glory of first love, even if it was all pretend for him, it wasn't for me.

The memories I shall cherish forever, and I guess I can thank him for pretending for me. Thank him for the little memories he left me with, and that is all I can say.

A lie takes two to work. One to speak it, and one to listen. I guess I am stuck listening again. How naïve I am, to believe he loved me. To believe I actually meant something to him. He could live forever, yet there he was with me, how could I believe such a thing? I was nothing more than an interest, I was human, and maybe there was something about my blood that lured him.

He always said I was special, that I was beautiful. Once again, lies. You'd think I'd hate him right? Well, surprise, surprise, I can't. I'm too weak to hate such a beautiful creature. I love him, truly I do. I miss him, I feel empty, incomplete.

Then suddenly, I got a sickening feeling in my gut. I sensed someone's presence. I gulped and turned around to find myself starring into the red eyes of a thirsty vampire. Victoria.

The plate I held fell to the ground and shattered to pieces, an impious smile on her lips. My body began to shake violently and my heart beat picked up. Fear starting to choke me. She had come for me.

"So we meet again, Bella." She smirked, her eyes scorching into mine. I was going to die. Tears started to fall silently down my cheek as I realized my wish for death was granted.

"W-what is it you want?" I whispered, my bottom lip trembling, and my voice shaking. I remember the last time I had seen her I was in terrible danger, and Edward was my hero. I wonder why he would go through all that trouble…

She smiled again, "You."

I backed up into the counter, it pierced into my side, but I ignored that pain. I grasped it tightly, needing something to help me stand.

"The Cullens are gone." I whispered, "What d-do you w-want with m-me?"

"Ah, yes. Your little family abandoned you, pity really. I was hoping to rub this in…just a bit."

She looked around the kitchen, walking around leisurely as if she was strolling along in the park. She picked up the knife from the counter and examined it in her hand.

"But that's alright; I have other ways to torture them…along with you." She told me, as if she was bored, she played with the knife in her hand, weighing it from hand to another.

"You see, Bella. It's mate for mate. I will hit him where it hurts; I will attack his weakest point. His heart. Well not exactly his heart but you get what I mean." She said without looking up, her voice itself sent shivers down my spine. So confident and strong, as if she knew this was going to be an easy death. "Your precious Edward," Edward. His name brought a new pain to my heart, I whimpered lightly at the name, and Victoria seemed to notice this.

"Does the name bother you, dear?" She questioned me, seeming concerned, fake. I know vampires can lie. Only because I had one lie many times to me before. Every time Edward would whisper he loved me, was a lie. I know better than to believe a single word that comes out of vampire's lips.

"E-Edward," His name burned my tongue, "Is g-gone. He l-left m-me." There. I admit the fact, though why am I stalling my death? Isn't this what I want?

Yes this is what I want. I reasoned with myself. Death is what I asked for and death is what I got…just not in the way I expected.

Victoria raised her eyebrow, "That, too, Bella, I am aware of. I actually know a lot more than you, for example the area where your little Edward is."

My breathing became rigid. Edward.

"Where is he?" I demanded my voice strong, though the tears did not stop. She placed down the knife and looked up at me.

"That is for me to know. You see, I have my intentions set on killing you. And I shall not leave until I do so. It will be a slow…gruesome…painful death. Shall explain how I will do it?" She asked me, a cheerful tone in her voice as if she was talking to me about love let alone death.

"First," She said, stepping closer to me, "I will break each of your legs. Making it hard for you to escape. Second, I will take this knife, and shove it down your throat. Letting you bleed for a while. Then I will cut each of your fingers off, which I will gladly mail to your boyfriend. Next I will gladly taste your blood, allowing my venom to flow into your veins." She smiled evilly, "That will be even more painful than any other pain you can compare it to. Then, when you beg me to kill you, I shall gladly comply."

I did not want to die like that, with so much pain. I did not want this!

"Please," I whispered, pushing myself further into the edge. Terror creeping up my throat, I felt like I was going to throw up as she slowly picked up the knife again, looking at in intensely.

"Oh, but I am not done." She said calmly, "You see, like I said, I will mail your Edward each of your fingers, and one toe. He will have to find the rest; he will follow the trail I shall lay for him because he would want to avenge you. And that is how you fit into this perfect."

She skimmed her nail along the blade of the knife, sharpening it. A sharp metallic sound filled the air, like nails on the chalk board; small sparks flew from the knife.

She grinned at me, "You will simply lay the trap, and I shall kill. He will fall right into me, and then I can kill him much worse than what I shall do to you, consider yourself lucky."

My hands were shaking and my teeth clattering, as she lurked towards me.

Then I heard it.

The sound of a car. Charlie.

"No!" I gasped, I will not letting Charlie get hurt!

I looked around frantically, as Victoria turned her head towards the door, also hearing my father word his way up towards the door. My eyes fell upon the door as well, my chest heaving up and down, I looked at the window.

It was a long shot but it was better than nothing.

I jumped up on the counter and quickly opened the window with fumbling hands. Victoria's head whipped around in inhuman speed and she lunged towards me, with a cried I threw myself out the window.

I cried out in pain as her hands made contact with my skin, so cold and so hard. She gripped my arm tightly until I heard a sickening 'snap' I screamed out as she twisted my arm.

I tried to pull myself out the window, trying to escape, my good hand gripped the frame, on leg outside, and I pulled against her grip. But of course she was too strong.

She pulled me back effortlessly and let me fall to the ground with a revolting thump, my head began to spin and I tasted blood in my mouth.

I saw Victoria's eyes darken and she pulled me up by the neck, choking me. I struggled against her iron grip, my lungs crying for air, I began coughing and sputtering. Pain on my right arm which lay broken and useless next to my body, seemed nothing compared to the pain in my chest.

"Bella?" I heard Charlie call franticly. No!

"C-Charlie." I sputtered, gasping for air, but Victoria's grip only tightened.

"Bella!" Charlie exclaimed his eyes wide as he ran into the kitchen.

"YOU LET HER GO RIGHT NOW!" He roared, taking his gun and pointing at her head.

She laughed bitterly, but only lifted me off the floor so I was dangling inches above the floor. Things were starting to get blurry now, block spots filling my vision.

Charlie's face was filled with terror and rage as he pulled the trigger on his gun. The gunshot sounded then before it hit her arm she let go of my neck and caught it effortlessly in the palm of her hand.

I fell to the ground gasping for air, coughing and panting. I held my right arm close to my body, and I saw the bone protruding out of my skin, purple bruises all around it. I got to my feet quickly, but not fast enough.

Victoria looked at the bullet in her hand, and smiled at she squeezed it gently, and it crumbled to pieces. Charlie's eyes widened and he shot her twice more, but it simply bounced of her skin, doing no damage.

"W-What are you!?" He yelled, pulling the trigger more and more. "Bella! Get behind me NOW!"

Victoria laughed bitterly as I attempted to run towards him, her fist caught me right in the jaw and I heard it crack, I fell yet again to the ground.

My jaw felt as it was broken, which I think it was. Tears burned down my cheeks as I cried out.

"Bella!" Charlie yelled and dropped his gun running towards him with only anger on his face. He ran past Victoria who stood by watching us with amused expression.

"Bella, oh Bella, please, hold on, I'll get us out of here, hold on." He whispered to me as he scooped me in his arms, but before he could lift me off the floor he was thrown back against the fridge.

"NO!" I sobbed, but I couldn't move, it hurt far too much. I struggled to stand up but receive another blow in the face, and I felt blood pour down my left cheek.

I saw Victoria bend over Charlie and smile on her lips, "You are brave for a human," She whispered, and with that she sank her teeth into his neck.

"DAD!" I screamed, I sat up and tried to stand again, "DAD!" I yelled again, tears falling freely.

"Bella," He whispered his lips cold and blue, his eyes wide and now lifeless. His bloodless body fell to the ground, and I broke down sobbing.

"No!" I moaned, "Charlie." I sobbed, then Victoria stood above me, nudge my face with her foot.

"Stand up; it will make this a lot easier. It seems I have to make this quicker than I thought."

I did not listen to her; I curled into a ball and cried at the loss of my father's life. HE CANNOT DIE!

"I said STAND UP!" She screamed and kicked me, hard, in the side, sending my flying against the counter. Blood trickled down my face and from the arm, along with my sides. It all hurt so much; I slumped against the counter, because I could not hold myself up.

She took my other arm and twisted it. I cried out as I heard it snap, not both my arms were useless.

"Stop!" I screamed, and she only smiled wider.

She took her foot, and gently at first placed her foot atop of mine. My eyes grew wide as she stepped down. The popping of my toes filling the air. I screamed louder, the immense pain everywhere. She laughed harder as she caught me before I fell to the ground, holding me up.

Then with a smug smile, she sank her teeth into my neck.

I was wrong.

The pain I felt before was nothing compared to this. I hurt badly, like a million bee stings, or a thousand shark bites all at once. I lashed out against her, crying in agony. I arched my back as she began to drink the blood out of my neck. The world slowly and painfully starting to fade.

Suddenly the door flew open and the pack ran in. It was hard to see 3 enormous wolves standing in my kitchen, and I knew others were waiting outside. Jacob bared his teeth and lunged at Victoria who had pulled her teeth out of my neck and dropped me to the ground.

Her eyes wide in shock.

Everything was on fire now. I screamed as the fire spread through me. I was changing. I knew it, it hurt so much! I distantly heard vicious growls, which I knew was Victoria's death.

The pain seemed to overcome everything now. All my sense, all my thoughts were all focused on this burning pain that ripped through me. I couldn't feel anything but this pain. As if everything was pain.

I couldn't feel my broken arms or foot; I couldn't feel the blood dripping down my face. Those pains are nothing compared to this. I heard if many times from Edward and Alice, the pain of changing. But I never would have imagined it, as cruel as this. There is nothing I could do to prepare myself to such a pain as the one I felt now.

As if a million pounds was dropped upon my body, and was thrown into a fire. I wanted death more desperately then I wanted it before.

I want Victoria to finish the job, hell I want Jacob to finish the job. I understand now, how people can beg for death, death…is sort of a form of escaping… for me escaping this blazing pain.

And I knew, this was only the beginning.

I heard Jacob's words wash over me. "Bella, Bella, oh no, Bella, please, Bella, please!"

He cried out in agony and I felt myself being lifted.

Jacob's POV.

I pulled her up into my arms as she twisted in pain. She screamed and lashed out, her eyes closed shut.

"Bella," I moaned, "NO!"

NOT MY BELLA! My beautiful, innocent Bella was turning to this…monster. It was my entire fault… all my fault.

I heard Sam and Leah finish up the job, and I ran with a screaming Bella in my hands towards the woods. This couldn't happen this can't happen.

I felt tears run down my cheeks and my moans in agony along with Bella's desperate cries of pain. I was helpless, there was no way I can help her now. A sobbed racked through me as I held her tighter, my Bella slowly fading.

"Jake!" Sam called from behind me.

I whirled around to face him, not bothering to wipe my tears. Sam's face twisted with pity and pain as his eyes landed on the screaming Bella. She began to struggle in my arms, clawing at me, leaving marks. But those tiny pains were nothing compared to the ripping in my heart.

"No…" Sam breathed, his eyes widening. His eyes instantly flashed to mine. "Jake…you know what this means."

I stared at him, then the realization hit.

"NO!" I roared, "I will NOT kill her! And neither will you! This is not her fault!" I yelled at him furiously.

No, I cannot kill Bella; I cannot let Bella die.

"It won't be Bella for much long, Jacob." Sam whispered, "We have the safety of others to consider."

I growled fiercely, no one will touch her. "Let me take her somewhere…let me take her home."

"Then what, Jake?" He yelled at me, stepping forward, "Let this monster wake? Let this thing kill our families? Jacob we live to protect, yet you are brining danger right into their paths."

"Please," I whispered, my eyes burning from the tears, my chest heaving. "I'll take her somewhere…out of Forks."

"We are not only protecting where we live, Jake. Please try to be reasonable."

Bella's ear splitting scream filled the air and both Sam and I winced, she twisted against my body, shuddering violently. A sob escaped from my lips as I watched her squirm in pain.

"Sam, please." I begged him, "I love her. I can't just let her die."

"Jacob, she's already dying."

I winced as his words cut through me. The pain in my chest throbbing, and my breathing heavy and laboured.

"We must do this now before the change is complete. By then it will be impossible to catch her, she's a newborn. Now Jacob."

I stared down at her, at her pained beautiful face, I gently wiped the tears from her closed eyes, and she cried out yet again. My poor Bella, how could I let this happen?

I was too late. I'm always too late! I was too late to love her, and now I'm too late to save her. What am I good for? I'm always two steps behind. Always a second too late. Always second best.

She still loves Edward that much I know. I can tell even now, as she's in pain, that she wishes it was Edward's arms around her rather than mine. Sometimes, I just don't understand how she can love such a vile cruel creature. But I understand now. Because the love of my life was now, a newborn vampire.

I love her no less. My heart still belongs to her, even if she won't take it. Now her heart… is slowly coming to a stop. Now I am to make the choice…keeping my Bella, or killing my Bella. Though she won't be Bella for much longer…because as her heart beat fades, so does her humanity.

She is the one thing I am sent to kill, the one thing that I am sworn to slaughter, simply by instinct. But I love her too much…there must be another choice.

I cannot picture my precious Bella as a killer. I cannot see her as a monster, no matter how hard I try to picture it, and I cannot find myself to hate this creature. Because I knew that this creature is Bella. Though it is against all nature, against all beliefs, I love her too much.

"I-I can't." I told him, my voice shaking along with my body.

"Then I will," Sam said gently, taking a step forward, and I reactively took a step back. "Jacob, this is the only way."

The pack came running now, all back into their human forms. The paused when they felt the intense atmosphere, and stopped a few feet away from Sam, their faces puzzled.

"What's going on here?" Jared asked, the tone in his voice sounded as if he really didn't want to know. Bella screamed out again, almost falling out of my arms, and all their heads snapped towards her, eyes widening.

"Shit…" Embry breathed, his hands going into fists.

"What are we going to do?" Jared asked, not taking his eyes off Bella.

"Kill it." Sam answered simply, a shrug of his shoulders.

I gritted my teeth, my anger flaring, I took a step back. "No you are not going to touch her."

Everyone's eyes flashed from mine to Sam's, and the all instantly took two steps back. Sam pinched the bridge of his nose, and sighed, taking a step forward.

"Listen, I am no longer asking for permission. This is an order."

"Then I'm sorry to reply that I cannot follow that order." I told him, trying to keep the fear out of my voice. I adjusted Bella in my arms, ready to run.

"Then I'm sorry that it must lead to this." He said gently, and looked over his shoulder at our family, who watched us with shocked, pained faces.

A growl ripped from Sam's throat, along with mine. Sam lunged at me, and the next thing I knew a large black wolf's teeth almost met my arm.

I jump back in surprise, and a growl ripped through me. Sam lunged again, and I easily dodged out of the way.

I knew I couldn't keep this up much longer, especially in my human form. Sam will have my throat and Bella's life.

Then out of nowhere a wolf with chocolate brown fur jumped in front of me, I recognized him as Quil, he snapped his teeth at Sam, causing him to jump back. Quil whipped his head around to me, his eyes wide, screaming only one word.

Run.

I twirled around and run into the road, I ran faster than I ever had, even as a werewolf. Bella was shaking and moaning in my arms, but all I heard was the fierce growls from behind me, slowly fading as I ran faster. I need Bella safe, even though she would soon be…soon be something she was not, right now that didn't matter.

Quil understood. I know that now. He loves Claire, as I love Bella. He would do anything for her, and he knows I would do the same for Bella. He understands me. He knows how I cannot have Bella die, just as he could not have Claire. He shares the same pain with me.

I came to the La Push boundary and I ran towards me home, step after step, faster and faster. My heart was beating fast now, and I could hear Bella's was too.

I approached my home now, I pulled out the key to my car, though it still needed some work it will do for now. I jammed my key into the lock and flung the door open, gently putting Bella inside. Her breath was heavy now, panting, her chest would raise and fall and her eyes remained tightly closed. I ran around to the other side and started the car. Without I second thought I backed out of the drive way and veered through the roads.

I debated with myself where I should go. I could go to Seattle; we could stay there until her transformation is complete…

Then what Jake? My conscience reasoned with me; leave her there to kill all those innocent people?

No… I couldn't do that. What to do? I let my mind wanderer as I sped through the roads, not exactly knowing which way to go. Then the idea hit me.

Canada.

I turned sharply at the corner, my tires squeaking against the pavement. I pressed on the gas harder, and I knew of course I would never get passed the border, that's alright.

I'll run.

My breathing was getting frantic as I came to a stop at a trail. The road ended and it was all trees, in front of me was a trail into the woods.

I looked around quickly, my eyes landing on Bella, who's eyes were tightly closed, sweat across her forehead, she was no longer screaming, but I could see she was in incredible pain, she seemed to be fighting it. That's my Bella. Always a fighter.

I shut the car off and ran around to Bella's side, opened the door quickly and scooping Bella into my arms. I debated for a moment; I looked at the trail, then at the think trees. I chose quickly since we didn't have much time. I ignored the trail that seemed to be calling at me, and made my way into the thickness of the forest.

Branches hit my face and I winced as they drew blood, I held Bella close to myself, draping my t-shirt over her shivering body. I started to run, for what seemed like the millionth time today. I pushed my way through the trees, jumped over the fallen logs, and tried to ignore that sharp pain from Bella's screams ever so often. She wouldn't scream as much, but still enough to make my heart clench.

As I ran I felt tears pour down my face, Bella. Bella. Bella. Bella. Why is the world so cruel? Why can't two people live happily? I could give her everything that life had to offer, I could help her. I could love her. She still stubbornly held on to Edward, that I already know, but I also know that once something is gone, all you have is the memory. I could help her let go of that memory. I could create new memories with her, I could make her happy. She loves me too; she said so, though not in the same way…still there is a part in her heart that loves me too. And I think eventually that part will eventually go stronger. But now. Her heart is fading.

There will be no more Bella to love…and it hurts. It hurts to think that, to think that my Bella is dying, and I am helpless. I know that…technically she's not really dying, I mean she'll still live after this…but differently. I wouldn't call what those leaches have "lives" but I can't think of any other term.

I wonder if…my love is strong enough to… overlook that. That maybe when you love someone…it doesn't matter what they are. I mean, she loves me right? Why can't I return the favour?

It goes against everything I know, everything I live for. In love with my worst enemy, that's a new one. I now doubt all my thinking, I use to think of vampires as evil, cruel, heartless- you know what I mean, nasty things. But Bella can never be that, she's too pure, too kind. I can't imagine her evil, it's just too strange.

I'm in love with a vampire. Oh joy.

I came to a clearing now, more like a meadow. My nose instantly scrunched up as I smelled that sweet, icy, sickening smell. The smell of vampire.

I leaned down to Bella, and sniffed her hair. It was not her…yet. This meadow. It smelled like vampire, as if it was stitched into each blade of grass and every leaf and petal. I looked around, puzzled, this was strange. There was no presence, simply the smell, like a memory.

Bella moaned loudly, her hands grasping the air then falling lamely at her side. She squirmed in my arms, her eye lid fluttered.

"Bella?" I whispered softly, wondering if magically she was waking. "Bella, love?"

Her eyes fluttered open and I gasped when I took in what I saw.

Her eyes were not only brown, but had specks of red. Her eyes were swimming with red, her jaw clenched, she did not move. I heard her heart beat, so…the…transformation isn't complete. Yet miraculously she had snapped out of it?

"Bella?" I asked again, shaking her lightly.

Maybe, my heart jumped, the transformation has somehow stopped, and maybe there wasn't enough venom or something. I wouldn't know. But maybe my Bella wasn't going to be a vampire.

She did not answer me, and she stared up at me with wild eyes.

"E-Edward?" She whispered, her eyes narrowing.

My heart dropped.

Edward? How could she mistake me for that bloodsu- that vampire? I don't know if she'll ever know, out of everything heart break she gave me, this has to be the worst.

Her head whipped around, and widening at the meadow, tears began to fall down her cheeks and she moaned in pain and instantly her eyes closed shut and she fell back into unconsciousness, and back into the pain.

Tears threatened to spill over as I began to run again. My chest heaving, not from exhaustion, but from the pain. You'd think, that the one time she could snap out of the pain, the one time she had a chance to see again, to escape from the pain, even for the briefest instant, she would have recognized me.

She should have taken that moment to apologize to me, apologize for taking herself away from me forever. Yet instead, like always, it was always Edward. Edward was always first for her, never poor little Jake. I sometimes wonder if the only reason she said she love me is because she's too kind. Bella doesn't have flaws, besides her clumsiness, none expect one.

She is far too kind. She always wants others to be happy, she tries and she tries so hard for others that sometimes she loses herself in the progress. That she focuses so strongly on other's happiness that she forgets her own, then she finds herself miserable. That's another reason why she should choose me, I could make her happy. I could be the one to worry about her if she didn't worry about herself. To hold her together when she can't do it herself, to dry her tears when she cries, to take the pain away. I can't do that this time. I can't take this pain away from her.

And so as her heart dies, I die with it.

The one moment we have the opportunity to speak to each to each other, to say our final words, mine: her name, and hers: his. It forever scarred my heart which is shattered in tiny pieces. We had that one chance to say our goodbyes, and then she whispered that one word.

I am just such an idiot. Here I am, saving this girl who doesn't even love me. Loving this girl who will soon be my immortal enemy. Caring for this girl who does not return the favour. What. Am. I. Doing? What is wrong with me, I mean can't I just find someone who actually loves me in return? Can't I have that one glimpse at happiness?

"Bella," I whispered, wondering if she could hear me, "You're tearing me apart, Bells."

I saw two tears slip from her closed eyes and I wiped them away quickly, and hugged her gently to myself as I continued to run. I shifted her gently so that her head lay on my shoulder, my arms around her. This was the last few memories I will have with her.

After this…I don't know what will happen. I just know I will always love her. Forever she will be remembered as the loving Bella I know is inside. Even if she's… when she's a vampire. I know my Bella is somewhere in there, starring at me. I know that the Bella I spent the best years of my life is smiling at me. I know that no matter what, she somehow loves me too. And I will always have that special place inside my heart that hold all our memories, our laughs, our tears, all of those will never be forgotten, and will never fade.

Suddenly Bella let out another heart breaking scream, one that was a little stronger than the others, I shut my eyes briefly, tears welling up. I ran faster, hours passed, and the moon was getting higher in the sky.

My skin was soaked with sweat, and my breathing was laboured, but I won't stop, not until Bella is safe.

17 Hours Later.

Was this possible? I guess if you love someone, anything is? Either way, I have been running for 17 hours now, with a few stops, but none long enough. The sun is high in the sky, and Bella's heart is beating faster. I remember Sam telling me that it takes about three days for the transformation for a vampire to be complete. I passed day 1, and I am not working my way through day two.

My legs were aching like hell, and my arms hurt. Sure I was a werewolf, but I am Jacob too. I needed to rest. If I was going to make it to Canada by late tonight, I have to rest.

I jogged my way to a motel, paint was peeling off the sides, and the T in MOTEL, was broken, so it read MOEL. Great, I'll be staying in someone's mole. This didn't matter much to me, as long as they have water and a bed, this is enough for me.

"One room, please?" I asked the guy behind the counter, as I pushed the creaking door open. His face brightened, and his eyes widened, seemed like he wasn't used to customers.

"Yes, yes, right this way." He said as I handed him 50$ hoping it was enough, and it seemed it was as his hands greedily took it from me.

He lead me towards a stair case, didn't look that safe but I followed him anyways. He eyed Bella carefully, but did not question. He probably didn't want to scare away his only customer. He unlocked a door with green paint chipped off, and shoved it open, revealing, one bed, one small, bed, a busted TV, a table, and three chairs, and hopefully a bathroom. I thank him quickly as he handed me the keys with a gracious smile.

"Anything you need, my boy?" He asked me, a think accent to his voice.

I smiled kindly, "Just water, thanks."

He left with a nod; I shut the door quickly, bolting both locks.

There was only one bed, probably not able to fit both Bella and I. But I guess I'll just make do. I placed her gently on the bed, she began to squirm a little when my hands left her, and I smiled to myself. At least she wants me around. There was a knock on my door, which I opened quickly, my dry throat screaming at me.

"Here you are, lad." He said, handing me two water bottles, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a 5 dollar bill and handed it to him. But he just shook his hand, waving his hand in the air saying,

"Honeymoon, discount."

I chocked a little on the waterI was drinking, but didn't bother to answer. I thanked him a closed the door, dead bolting it again.

Honeymoon? I didn't look that old did I? And did he seriously I'd drag my new bride, my new unconscious bride to this piece of crap? I smiled to myself, it's alright though, I'd like my first honeymoon to be with Bella anyways.

I looked at Bella, her breath was heavy, but luckily no screams escaped from her, I don't exactly what that guy would be thinking we're doing up here, but I have a pretty lucky guess. I gently lay down, next to Bella, and placed her so that she was half on the bed and half on me. I didn't mind, it was easier to keep an eye on her this way.

My eye lids instantly began to droop; I have never felt so tired in my life. My muscles were aching, and everything seemed to numb. With a sigh, I let exhaustion wash over me, and soon I was unconscious, dreaming of Bella, and the times when we were simply Jake and Bells, not vampire and werewolf.

Bella's POV.

I want Edward.

Probably more than I wanted him before, I want him even more than death. Save me, please, Edward. I whispered, though I didn't feel my mouth moving, the pain seemed to devour over everything and only got stronger when I thought of Edward.

He never wanted his, he left me because I am worthless, hideous, nothing, but mostly I think, because I wasn't a vampire. He didn't want to change me that much was clear. But now, here I am, a soon to be, newborn vampire. What will he think of me now? He'll probably hate me, even more than he does now.

Still I begged for him, I wanted him to come back and be there when I open my eyes for the first time. I want him to be there for me when I get my first whip of human blood. I want him to be there for my first hunting trip, to teach me and show me that side of him, he was too afraid to show me when I was human. I want him here to love me. I want him here so I can spend the rest of my forever with him. So when I open my eyes I have a reason to live. So that I have a reason to smile, so I have a reason to laugh, so I just won't be this empty, lonely, vampire.

How can I go on living? I am immortal now? This life has no value; I wanted this because I had the chance to spend forever with Edward. And now I have forever, but no Edward. I didn't want his without him, but I loved his so much that I would have had him without this.

Right now, the only thing I want, more than death itself, is to have Edward whisper those three beautiful words. Even if it was lies…even if he doesn't mean it. I need to hear it. I don't want to live my humanity yet, not until I hear it, I want my last human moments to belong to him. I need it. I need it now.

Suddenly his scent hit me. Pain seemed to explode at the sudden smell. It smelled like Edward. I cannot really describe how he smells, only that it is my favourite smell in the whole world. This brought all the memories, and the pain racing back, choking me.

I gasped as the pain began to grow stronger, my heart almost exploding. Edward. He was here. I need to open my eyes. I need to see him.

"Bella?" A voice whispered, my heart jumped, he came back! "Bella, love?"

Bella…love.

Oh dear Lord. He said it, not the right words, but close enough. If my name, and love, is in the same sentence, dear Lord, that's enough for me.

I opened my eyes slowly, my vision was blurry.

I couldn't see anything solid. Everything was a mix of colors, yet so sharp, as if someone had put contacts in my eyes. Everything was blurry yet sharp at the same time, if I focus on one particular item, I think I can see it.

I saw Jacob face, so close to mine, leaning down to me with this worried expression. Then suddenly his face transformed into the face I would never allow myself to think of. The face that was seen in my dreams so many times, the face that held the best days of my life. The black hair formed into messy, bronze hair, the eyes turning into the topaz color.

Edward.

He had a small smile on his face, a sad smile. His eyes seemed to smother me, that if I could breath properly, I'd be gasping…maybe I was.

"E-Edward?" I whispered, his name once again burning my tongue, a stinging feeling. My heart overreacted as his name left my lips. I guess that's the effect of being so broken…

That the simple mutter of his name would send your heart flying. So that every single memory you have together turned into this horrible reminder of what you lost. So every song…remind you of him. So every distinct object can crumble you to pieces. So that everything you loved instantly turns to everything you hate, you hate because it reminds you of him. So that you're whole life turns into this bottomless black hole with no escape.

My breath escape from me and my eyes rolled to the back of my head as I fell back into this hole. The pain consuming over me as I fell.

Jacob's POV.

I woke up to Bella's piercing scream. Her back was arched in pain and her hands clawed at my shirt and the bed sheets. She groaned loudly, her breathing rigid, and her heart was flying.

I frantically looked at the clock, my eyes fuzzy from sleep.

No.

NO! NO! NO! NO!

I sat up quickly, pushing Bella aside, I slammed my fist into the wall, denting it slightly I yelled out in rage and clenched my fists, my nostrils flaring.

HOW COULD I DO THIS?

7:53PM is what the clock read.

I.

Just.

Slept.

Through.

The.

Third.

Day.

HOW COULD I? I am SO weak! I am stupid. I am everything that is wrong in life! I just slept through the final and last day of Bella's transformation. I missed my last chance with her.

I freaking slept through the last day we had together. I'm surprised her screams didn't wake me. I hate myself!

She screamed again, her heart beating faster now; tears did not stream down her face. She was too far past to cry. She would never cry again.

Shit, we're in a motel. WE'RE IN A FREAKING MOTEL. With humans! How could I do this to Bella? I put her right in a situation, a dangerous situation. The smell of blood was strong for her, that I knew.

I whipped my head around as a new smell hit my nose.

A sweet, icy, smell. My Bella…a vampire.

She screamed out again, whimpering, but I could not touch her. I can never hold her like I did before, ever again. I missed my last chance. I missed my last chance to hold her; I missed my last chance to kiss her. I missed everything.

Her heart was beating faster and faster, it was unnaturally fast now. Till suddenly…

It stopped all together.

Bella screamed out again, the windows slightly shook, and my hands clenched. Her breathing stopped too, then, slowly, she opened her eyes.

And I braced myself to die. That or…I braced myself to kill this vampire.

Her eyes were now red, red from the blood. It was scary, and now she was also beautiful.

She was beautiful before, perfect really. But this was a different type of beautiful, an unnaturally beauty, something that seems to perfect to be real. She sat up slowly, her beautiful brown locks of hair tumbling over her shoulders.

Her head instantly turned towards me, and her nose wrinkled in disgust. Her chest gradually began to move again, as she started to breathe again. Her eyes widened slightly when I stared into them, sending a mental warning.

"Jake?" She breathed, her voice sounding like Bells…it was not normal, and I already missed her voice.

"Yeah, Bells." I answered, forcing a smile.

She stood quickly, too quickly. She was too fast that it was a blur. First I saw her sitting, then next thing I knew she was standing a foot away from me.

"You smell weird." She told me, her nose still crinkled. A sad smile was on my lips as I answered,

"You smell weird too."

Her smile in return was beautiful.

"So, I guess…this is me…as a…vampire." She whispered, almost too soft.

"Y-Yeah, I guess it is."

"Are you…are you going to kill me now?" She asked me, her eyes understanding, yet sad.

I cleared my throat, "No."

She frowned in confusion, "Won't Sam be angry?"

"Yes, that's why we're not with Sam."

She nodded her head, and we fell into silence.

"So…are you going to?" I asked her, knowing what was coming. Know that she couldn't resist it this long.

"What?"

"Are you going to kill me now?" I asked her, my voice shaking lightly.

She seemed shocked and hurt by my answer. "NO!"

"Are you sure?" I asked her, totally confused, this made no sense!

"Why would I kill you?!" She exclaimed, almost hysterical.

"Because I'm a werewolf? Because you're a vampire? A newborn vampire?"

She seemed deep in thought when she answered, "I don't…I don't feel the thirst." She answered softly.

"I don't understand." I told her, this was impossible I should be dead right now.

"It's just…not calling to me. I mean, I know it's there…but it's just like…not a big deal right now."

"That shouldn't be…that's not normal." I told her.

"When was I ever normal?" She laughed softly, taking a small step towards me, her arms slightly open. "You stink really badly, Jake. But thanks."

I held my breath as she wrapped her arms around me, hugging me only for a quick second.

Then the pain came.

I gasped as I felt myself being drained, my energy being drained. Bella gasped too, but I felt as if a part of me when being stolen. It burned. My body quivered with pain and Bella seemed to be in some sort of other world. Her eyes were clouded and her mouth hung open.

When her arms left my body, I felt myself become weak, and my eyesight blackened.

The last thing I heard was Bella's tearless sobs, and I let this unknown blankness wash over me.

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Taa daa !

That was the first chapter to my new series. I hope you guys liked it, and I know that the part where Bella wakes from her transformation doesn't seem realistic, but hey its fanfiction. Also just to clear it up, she woke because she smelt Edward, and Edward memory became stronger and pulled her out. Also one of Bella's powers is that she has amazing self control, that's why she didn't kill Jake, but there still one power yet to be discovered. Dun dun dun!

Please review, it makes me write faster! ehe