borrowed
a d d i c t i o n

--katie

(jason / mitchie)

I'm not a huge Jitchie fan, but you all know how much i love to challenge myself. (: So yes, I bring you Jitchie.

--

The sun was sinking in the October sky, lower and lower, until Jason Gray could no longer see its radiant, majestic beauty. As soon as he could no longer see it, he disappeared into his house, forgetting to lock the door when he closed it (oh well, the Canadians do it all the time).

"Getting cold out, isn't it?" the soft, homely voice of his best friend (his lover) sounded.

"A little bit. The sun set, though, that's why I came inside," Jason replied, idly turning his head to get a clear view of the outside.

"Are you alright, Jason? You look...distracted..." his friend said, and Jason looked down sadly.

"Why did you come here, Mitchie? You're supposed to be recording," Jason asked.

His friend, Mitchie Torres, bit her lip; "I don't know. I missed you."

A small smile made its way onto Jason's features, but he made certain that it was gone before she could catch sight of it. He had missed Mitchie as well, more than she would ever know.

But that still didn't make her presence anymore acceptable.

Mitchie, sweet and unoffensive, whispered sweet, unoffensive words in her sweet, unoffensive manner in return. Jason couldn't help but think that Mitchie was sort of lying to herself, and justifying her actions with ridiculous notions.

Jason was stupid, but not quite that stupid.

"You need to go, Mitchie. Please?" Jason begged in hushed, desperate tone.

Mitchie beckoned for him in return, smiling a small smile. Jason was unsure of what she was going to do, but he went toward her anyway.

"I'll leave," she whispered, "if you tell me you want me to."

Jason's mouth went dry. How could he tell her that he wanted her to leave. That was like telling her that he didn't want her at all.

And he wanted Mitchie.

Oh, did he ever want her.

"Mitchie," he pleaded as he brought a hand to her cheek, "don't do this. Please don't make me say it.

"Say it," she murmured before tilting her head upward to catch his lips in a desperate kiss.

Jason's head whirled, and he felt very dizzy.

Mitchie was Shane's girl. His brother's. Mitchie was seventeen. He was twenty-one. Mitchie was everything. To both him and Shane.

Their lips touched for a few seconds more before Jason finally managed to find the willpower to break away.

"Are you going to say it?"

"I want you," Jason began, watching Mitchie's innocent features distort into a frown, "to stay."

He was being stupid and irrational (as per usual), but he didn't want the moment to end. His time with Mitchie limited itself – why limit it anymore than he had to?

A beautiful smile graced Mitchie's face, and he couldn't help but smile in return. Though what they were doing was wrong (so very wrong), neither part cared much.

Jason too distracted, Mitchie too in love (or lust, rather), they kissed with inexplicable fervor.

Mitchie whispered his name ("Jason") in a breathy manner as he parted her lips with his tongue. Waves of pleasure overcame him; he feared that if he stopped kissing her, he might die.

"Make love to me, Jason," she gasped aloud when his teeth grazed her lower lip.

Jason's lips ceased to move. "I can't, Mitchie. I don't want to hurt anyone."

"By kissing like this, we've already hurt Shane without him knowing it, if that's what you're afraid of. Please Jason. Please do this with me."

"No, Mitchie!" Jason hissed, pulling away from Mitchie. He could kiss Mitchie...but he would never steal her innocence. No. Shane deserved that right – he had earned that right.

Taken aback, Mitchie stuttered in response; "I-I...I..."

"I'm sorry, Mitchie. I don't want to hurt Shane like this. He's my brother, and my best friend. You shouldn't have come here," Jason shook his head, running a hand through his thick, dark hair.

Tears welled up in Mitchie's eyes, and guilt began to set in Jason's stomach. The guilt that he'd been avoiding – denying – for so long.

"And do I want to hurt Shane?"

"I don't know," Jason mumbled unhappily.

His eyes flew downward in shame as Mitchie's tears began to fall.

"Why me?" he could hear Mitchie say to herself, and his words died in his throat.

He knew that most of this wasn't really his fault, but he couldn't thinking that it was.

"Sorry," he said in a hushed monotone.

"This isn't your fault," Mitchie shook her head and wiped away her tears.

"But I feel like it is, Mitchie."

"I want a do-over," she sighed dejectedly.

"We can have a do-over if and when you and Shane break up," he reasoned softly before exiting the room.

He didn't turn around, but he could see more tears pooling in Mitchie's eyes, threatening to spill.

No more Mr. Nice Guy, Jason thought as he heard Mitchie getting her keys.

"Close the door when you leave. It's getting chilly," Jason picked up a CD, repeating Mitchie's earlier sentiment.

"I do love you, Jason," her quiet voice sounded.

"Not enough to leave Shane," Jason's response savored strongly of bitterness, and hurt.

"Not enough to leave Shane," Mitchie repeated softly.

And then, Jason heard the hard slam of the door, and the noisy start of Mitchie's car.

Desperate, he drowned himself in a bottle of wine, trying to forget the girl he would never be enough for.

It was a comfort to know that some addictions didn't have to be borrowed.

--

Wow, depressing much?

If you ask me what the last line means, re-read the story and THEN ask. ;)

Please review with more than "so cute" or "i loved it," thanks!