BOOT TO THE HEAD!

by Ri-kun

and the

Death Eaters

"For this week's DA meeting," Harry spoke, gathering everyone's attention. "I would like to focus on a new threat the Death Eaters have been employing recently. This is a serious matter, and I would like everyone's full cooperation."

"What's going on, Harry?" Hermione asked, raising her hand.

"Yeah," Ron added. "If there were some new threat, wouldn't we have heard about it before now."

"I don't think Dumbledore is taking it into account. For once," he added. "And none of us here need to be reminded of how the Ministry does things. That leaves it up to us."

"He's right," Neville readily agreed.

"I'm glad you feel that way, Neville," Harry said. "Because I was hoping you'd be willing to help me out in a demonstration of what we're up against."

Everyone looked Neville's way, but for once, the freckled boy just swallowed and stepped forward. "Show me what to do," he said bravely to Harry.

"Just stand right there for a second," Harry told him. "Just like that. Perfect!"

"Now," Harry turned, addressing the others. "The Death Eaters have begun dabbling into some more obscure branches of magic recently. I think they're doing this under Voldemort's instruction, of course, so that he can overcome the Order and the Ministry at the same time more effecently. If what I suspect is true, we need to arm ourselves with the same type of spells."

"Harry..." Hermione interrupted, not bothering to raise her hand this time. "Are you sure about this? We shouldn't be practicing Dark magic, even if the Death Eaters are using it. Using spells like that will just lower us to their level."

"Are you saying we should just let them come and kill us, then?" Cho Chang demanded, glaring her way. "Harry knows what he's doing."

"Right!" Ginny added, not about to be outdone.

"But..."

"None of this is Dark magic," he assured her. "Not in and of itself. It's how the magic is practiced that makes it Dark or not. I wouldn't have suggested Neville or anyone else for that matter if it were the least bit dangerous."

"Oh," Hermoine said, blushing. "Right."

"So, if there are no more questions..." he said, looking around. When no one moved, Harry nodded. "Good. Neville, this won't hurt a bit."

Neville straightened himself up. "No worries," he said, bravely. "I can take it."

"I'm sure you can," Harry replied, pulling out his wand. "Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"Ow!"

"Harry!" Hermione shouted.

Neville staggered slightly. "You booted me in the head!?"

"Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"Harry, stop it!"

"No, don't!" Ron wheezed, cluching his sides with laughter. "That was bloody brilliant!"

"I'm glad to hear you feel that way," Harry said, rounding on him. "Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"Ow! That's not fair, mate!" Ron whined.

"I should say it is," Hermione bit at him. "Harry, this is serious. We're supposed to be here to learn about how to fight against Dark magic and the wizards using it! This isn't the time for silly..."

"Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"Oooowwwwwww!" she screamed!

"Gee, thanks mate!" Ron said, rubbing his forehead. "But, to be fair, I've been wanting to see something like that for years now!"

"Oh, you did, did you?" Hermione snapped, drawing her wand.

"Wait, Hermione! I didn't mean..."

"BOOT TO THE HEAD!"

"Umpht!"

Ron was thrown clear off his feet as an enormous steel-toed boot struck him across the face. Everyone stared at her in horror as Hermione turned back around with a satisfied expression on her face.

"Hermione..." Harry said softly.

"What?!" she demanded.

"Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"Hermione!" Neville cried out. "Harry, you... BOOT TO THE HEAD!"

Harry ducked. "You missed."

Neville gulped. "Oh, bugger."

"Boot to the Head!"

WHAM!

"So," Harry said, turning to the remaining conscious DA members. "What can everyone say they've learned from this experience?"

Ginny very meekly raised her hand.

"Yes, Ginny?" Harry called.

"First of all," she began. "I'd have to say that the first lesson is to always expect the unexpected, because that's how the Death Eaters think."

"Precisely!" Harry cheered. "You got it in one!"

"And secondly," Ginny added, raising her wand. "Make sure you fire off multiple shots! BOOT TO THE HEAD X 10!"

Harry calmly waved his wand in a circle, forming a shield around himself that sent each and every one of Ginny's boots right back at her. "Thirdly," Harry went on. "Always make sure you've mastered a very strong Shield Charm. Is there anyone else?"

"Just me," Seamus said. "None of us here can defeat you. Is that right?"

"That's right."

"So, we'll have to gang up on you!" he cheered. "Get 'em, guys!"

"Boot to the Head!" Harry cast. "Boot to the Head! Boot to the Head!"

"Ow!"

"Ow!"

"Ow!"