Hey guys, sorry for not updating in a while, but i was on vacation and then i got sidetracked with my other story... please don't kill me!! Plus, i already have half of the next chapter written, so that should be up very soon, possibly later today or tomorrow!!!! YAYYYYY!!! And the worst part? This chapter has been sitting in my computer - finished, for about a week??? :*(


Edward POV

The Volvo accelerated as my foot itched forward, reacting in praise to the breakneck speed I was pushing it to. I glanced over towards Bella who was still looking out her window. We had been driving for over twenty minutes now and she had yet to say a word, much less a sound.

After our 'incident' in the book store, she had grabbed three books at random from the bookshelf closest to her and cashed out, barely paying attention to what she was doing. I'm not even sure she knows what books she bought.

My eyes slid over towards the passenger seat again, but this time they caught hold of a pair of wide golden eyes. My jaw clenched and I turned my attention back towards the road. I could feel Bella's gaze still on me as I watched the headlights of passing cars, more like cars I was passing.

"Edward…" she said softly, trying to capture my attention. Absurd. I thought. You have my attention every second of every day. "Mmm?" I mumbled, acknowledging I was listening. I heard her sigh and a wave of her scent hit me as she flipped her hair over her shoulder to hide her face. It was a good thing her blood didn't call to me anymore because my jaw was already clenched enough, if it was clenched anymore, my teeth were sure to break.

"Never mind…" she mumbled, her face now completely hidden from sight because of her wall of hair. I looked over at her, back at the road, then back at Bella again, wondering why she was so uncomfortable. She was playing with her hands, twisting and untwisting her fingers together.

A tremor trailed down my spine when I remembered the electricity that had coursed through my body when Bella's hand was in mine. Bella looked up at me, having seen me shake slightly and asked, "Are you alright?" I nodded my head quickly, curtly, knowing that if I even tried to say one or two words, a million would spill out over my mouth, explaining my feelings, my thoughts, and my… input on our current relationship.

I mentally snorted thinking of the word relationship. I highly doubted that I could call what we had right now a relationship. It was my entire fault. This whole situation. If I hadn't come back, if I had just been strong enough to stay away….

"Edward," Bella's voice broke through my thoughts, piercing the quiet of the car with her beautifully melodic voice. My head snapped towards her, still lost in my self-loathing thoughts. I could see in her eyes that she knew what I was thinking. They were filled of sadness, but also equipped with displeasure. "Don't." was all she said, her eyes locked on mine.

At that moment, I was more glad than I had ever been before that I didn't necessarily need to look at the road ahead of me while I drove, because if I did, I don't think I could turn away from her intense stare.

I grimaced and slowly turned back to face the road. "Why?" I questioned, concentrating on breathing deeply and not breaking the wheel. "How can you not blame me for this… this situation, Bella? It's entirely my fault. If I hadn't come back. If I hadn't left. If I had just made up my mind. Of course I wanted to come back, but I shouldn't have. Now look. Look what's happened to you. See? I told you that I'm no good for you! First my presence upsets you immensely, and now your other family is leaving…"

I trailed off as I heard Bella's sharp intake of breath. My head turned towards her and my mouth opened slightly in shock. Her face was turned towards the window, but that didn't hide the fact from me that she was crying. I gasped in shock as I realized that I had, once again, hurt my Bella.

I had been so stupid to bring up Emily and Sean! I knew it was still a tender subject, yet I was too preoccupied in my self-loathing that I had dismissed Bella's feelings for my own. Disgusted with myself, I slammed down on the gas, not caring of the other passengers on the road at this point, only caring about Bella and how I had just hurt her.

I chanced a look at Bella and turned away almost immediately. It was hard enough to see Bella upset, but it was even harder to know that I had caused it.

I focused back on the road, knowing exactly where I was headed.

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I pulled the Volvo into a deserted clearing off the highway as Bella gave me a questioning look. My lips pulled into a tight line in answer to her question and she took to looking out the window again. I parked the car in front of a half dead tree.

The irony of the tree symbolizing how I felt almost made me laugh, almost. I opened the door as soon as the car halted to a stop. Bella looked over towards me, confused. I vampire-walked over to her side and pulled open the door. I pulled her out of the car, threw her on my back, shut the door, and without a single complaint from her, took off running deeper into the woods.

"I can run, you know." Bella whispered against my cold cheek. "I know." I muttered without breaking my stride. Bella rested her chin on my shoulder, her cheek brushing against mine. I felt the invisible tears brush against my cheek that hadn't yet dried from hers.

I ran in silence, concentrating on mine and Bella's breathing, synching mine with hers. The feel of her smooth skin against my neck was almost enough for me to lose concentration, but I kept going towards the Meadow.

I couldn't even count how many times I had come here when my family had returned to Forks. The place was full of sad memories, good memories, but sad because they reminded me of what used to be. Bella sniffled quietly in my ear and it brought me back to the current situation – I had hurt her.

I sighed as I slowed down. We were just on the outside of the Meadow now. I came to a stop and allowed Bella to climb off my back. I walked forward quickly, Bella trailing more slowly behind.

"Bella, I'm sorry." I mumbled, stepping over a fallen tree. "I don't know what's wrong with me. It seems that I can't do or say one thing without upsetting you."

I reached the center of the Meadow and turned around to watch Bella walking towards me.

"Edward," she sighed, shaking her head. She was walking slowly, watching her step. Even though she was a vampire she was still incredibly clumsy. "You have to stop blaming yourself every time when I'm sad. It's not your fault that Emily and Sean left. It's not your fault that I still haven't gotten over it. If anything it's my fault. It's my fault that they're leaving; it's my fault you left-"

My loud growl interrupted Bella's rant. She looked up at me, surprised as I reached her having run at vampire speed. I grabbed her chin roughly in my hand, forcing her to look at me. "Bella. You need to stop blaming yourself whenever something happens. It is not your fault that Sean and Emily are leaving, and it is most definitely not your fault that I left. It was my own stupid fault, my own stupid idea."

I let go of Bella's chin and dropped my head, stepping back from her.

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Bella POV

I looked down as Edward stepped back. It was times like these that I wanted to take Edward back, but I knew that I needed to do it right.

"I thought we weren't going to talk about it anymore…" I mumbled, taking a sudden interest in a blade of grass in front of my feet. I heard Edward's sharp exhale as his hand came up to run through his bronze mess.

I watched him, wanting more than anything to run my own fingers through his hair. I pushed the thought aside with a bit of difficulty. "Bella, you should talk to them. Listen to them – and I'm not saying that what they're doing is acceptable, I'm just saying that you know that if they left and you never said good bye, you would regret it for the rest of eternity."

I averted my gaze from Edward, stubbornly turning my head to the side and crossing my arms across my chest. "What if I don't care anymore, huh? Because I don't. I'm glad they're leaving." I lied through my teeth, knowing full well that Edward knew that as well.

He chuckled humorlessly. "You always were stubborn, Bella, but you also know that that's not true." My arms fell from their cross and hung loosely at my sides as my head fell forward. Next thing I knew I was caught in a stone cold embrace, being held up.

"Come on. I'll bring you to go see them." Edward's voice whispered in my ear quietly. I wanted to refuse, to decline his plan but at the moment I couldn't. Edward's honey scent was seeping through my brain, circling my thoughts, suffocating them. I looked up into Edward's gentle topaz eyes as they probed back into my soul.

Hey guys. I'm reallllllyyyy sorry that I haven't updated in sooo long. Blame the evil people who invented finals, and my mom for grounding me from the computer 0_0

Okay so please review!!!