Nightly Routine

Summary: Hiyono just can't sleep without her nightly routine. Ayumu x Hiyono. One-shot

Disclaimer: I do not own Spiral.

Beta Reader: Lady Charliie

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She was always one to sleep easily. She had never had a problem with sleeping before. Every night, all she had to do was lay under the cover and close her eyes, say those few words she said every night, and she'd be asleep in ten seconds. It was as easy as saying, "One, two, three."

So how come that that night, the night that she wanted to sleep the most because being awake, alone at night was something she hated, she couldn't sleep?

Why was it so that she couldn't sleep the day he wasn't home?

She hated it. She hated sitting there, waiting for him to come home, so she could have a good night's rest. She hated sitting there in the darkness with the shadows overpowering her eyes. She hated the eerie silence that enveloped throughout the complex. She especially hated being alone in the middle of the night while creaks and thumps echoed throughout the rooms. And most of all, she hated not being able to say what she said every night. Those three little words that meant everything to her and, surprisingly, him.

Her caramel hair flowed softly over her shoulders as she rested her head between her knees. She sat comfortably on the couch as her copper eyes gazed over the dark, empty room. The windows were hidden behind curtains, but she could make out the dim light of the moon blinking from between the crevice. It was an unfamiliar feeling, to be out of bed late at night, not sleeping.

She tightly grasped the blanket that was neatly folded on the couch and placed it over her as she snuggled deeper into the warmth of the cushions.

The apartment complex was vacant except for her, the dark covering each space provided. He was still working. It was abnormal for him to work so late, but she had dismissed it and tried to sleep anyway but failed. She had come to a decision that he was probably the reason for her discomfort. She had never slept without him before. She had, in fact, never slept unless she had told him, "I love you" right before bed. It was always the same routine, and it wouldn't be any different even if he wasn't home yet.

She heard the door click open, and the lights flickered on. As the brightness blinded her, she found herself squinting. She felt the tinge of the cold burst upon her and shivered.

He stared at her with surprise, his dark russet eyes widening slowly. He had thought she would have been asleep by the time he returned home. He turned the lights off as quickly as he had turned it on. Her eyes readjusted again, and she made out his figure in the dark, dim space provided.

"Why are you up late?" he asked placidly. He shut the door quietly behind him and took off his coat, placing it gently on her as he had noticed her shivering even with her blanket. He unwound his scarf, the scarf she had did her best to knit for him for Christmas though it turned out to be horrible, and he placed it on the couch. She grabbed it and wound it around her bare neck.

"I couldn't sleep," she replied meekly. "It's weird without you next to me. And I wanted to tell you what I say every night. I felt odd not saying it, and a guilty conscience rained on me while I tried sleeping. It sounds stupid, doesn't it?"

He simply nodded as he made his way to the kitchen to brew some herbal tea. "You shouldn't feel guilty, and it's not stupid," he said quietly. He turned on a lamp, and the light was dim. She heard him place the kettle on the stove and listened quietly as it rumbled softly. It was silent but not awkward as a warm atmosphere surrounded their bodies. She snapped her head up as a piercing whistle erupted the silence. When he was done taking the kettle off the stove and pouring it into a cup, he handed it over to her.

She looked up at him in surprise. "Don't you want some?"

"I don't need it." She took the warm cup from his hands and brought her lips to the rim to take a sip. Her mind and body felt enhanced afterward. His eyes gazed over her, and he lifted his warm fingers and brushed her forehead ever so slightly. "Are you sick?"

She shook her head, her caramel-colored locks shaking with her.

"Hn." He took another glimpse at her and noticed how her hair was disheveled and how her eyes had started to form dark lines underneath them. With one glance, he could already tell she was exhausted. "You should go back to bed."

She hesitated. She did not want to go to bed without him. "How about you?"

"I'll be there after I change."

She nodded and got up from the couch, placing her cup down gently onto the table. The jacket and scarf slid off onto the sofa. The blanket was wrapped around her comfortably as she made her way to their room. She tucked herself under the thick covers and lay quietly until she felt his warm body next to hers. They were both quiet for a moment or so. Her soft voice broke the silence. "Are you still awake?"

He didn't answer with any words but rather shifted his body.

"I love you," she whispered softly. It was the same routine everyday. She would ask the same question and say the same phrase, but each time, she meant it. She needed the routine to sleep. Sometimes, she felt that if she didn't say such words, he would feel lonely, back to the way he was when she first met him. She didn't want him to feel that way ever again.

"I know." His response was always the same.

"How come you never say it too?" she inquired. He had never told her he loved her, not even once. In a way, he had showed it instead. The way he looked at her and nobody else, the way he touched her gently yet firmly, the way he spoke with her. It was different than the way he treated everyone else, including his sister-in-law, who was all he had when his brother left them both. The routine was already broken and by asking the question, it would remain so, but she couldn't care less now that she told him those three words.

He was quiet as he contemplated. "Because it's stupid."

"You think loving me is stupid?" she asked, anger and melancholy apparent in her voice. She turned her body around to face him, her bronze eyes blazing with fury.

His russet eyes responded emotionlessly. "I think saying it is stupid. 'I love you' is overrated. Everyone uses it too easily for a different reason, yet it's supposed to be these strong words. Now, they're just words, so why say them?"

She settled down in silence and decided that his answer pleased her though not thoroughly. His answers usually always pleased her because they were so logical, so… him; however, she didn't think 'I love you' was that much abused. She thought it depended on whom she said it too. "When I say it, I mean it."

"I know." And he did. Because it was just like her to.

"Will you say them? For me?" She wanted to hear him say those three little words once.

"No." It took him only a second to reply.

She hated the way he answered so easily, like he didn't love her enough to say those words though she knew differently. Her eyes gazed into his. She could see that his usual emotionless eyes were once again cold but there was a remnant feeling of love. A wistful smile painted its way onto her face. "You said it."

He only grunted in response.

Knowing it was the closest he'd ever go to saying those words, she rested her head next to his heart. She could hear it beating softly and smiled. "I love you."

"I know." I love you. Never would he say it out loud but only with his eyes and his actions towards her. "You can sleep now." He knew that the reason she couldn't sleep was because she had not been able to perform her nightly routine. Now that she had, she was able to sleep all she wanted.

"You'll never be lonely again, ne? Because I'm always here for you. Because I love you," she murmured as her eyes started resting.

"I know. Go to sleep," his gruff voice muttered quietly.

And everyday, it was the same routine. And it was the only way she could ever sleep.

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And thank you soooo much to Lady Charliie for betareading my story. I am extremely thankful. :]

xoxo MimiMichie