How To Survive A Horror Movie: Part VI
Sorry this took so long to write. I haven't had any other ideas.
1. If the alien with the dreads leaves you alone, don't call him a coward because he didn't kill you. You just insulted him. Now you die.
2. If you are looking at a person then turn around and see there is a mirror, but the person doesn't have a reflection, you're dead.
3. Don't say, "It's a piece of cake."
4. If you are walking down the street and see a murder taking place, run and call the cops. Make sure the killer doesn't see you.
5. The guy with the sweater and claw isn't going to help you if you're lost.
6. Friday the 13th isn't a good day to go to a certain camp.
7. If you meet up with a guy in a mental institution and he is in a plastic or glass barrier, make sure that you are polite.
8. Don't mess with the Goblin King.
9. The guy with the weird looking face that has a chainsaw in his hand isn't going to be nice.
10. Have you noticed that there are no nice clown movies?
11. Between you and me, I wouldn't go in that abandoned building.
12. That ghost that you have to say his name 3 times can stay out of a certain place for dead people if you marry him.
13. Don't take that Aztec gold piece.
14. If you see a ghostly ship with Black sails, you better get off the dock and run before the cannons fire.
15. If you see a ship with Black sails that isn't ghostly, then run to the dock and say hello to the pirate captain that steps off.
16. Never tell the Goblin King that glitter and lip gloss is for girls.
17. Don't just stand there! Run!
18. Never tell a certain cannibal to "Bite me." He might take it literally.
19. When you are outside, and nothing is around, look in the trees. Chances are that something will be hiding in them.
20. Don't take a certain barber's daughter away from him.
21. if you are a guy, don't go to the barber on Fleet Street.
22. Even Chuck Norris wouldn't be able to help you if you are surrounded by talking apes.