Miracle

Confessions of the Library

I never knew it could be this sweet...this love I feel for him. This ridiculous unrequited love, or just unrequited as far as I know. I don't know how he feels, but we are best friends. At least that's a good thing. He knows nothing of how I long for his fingers to lace themselves with mine or how I wish those rosy lips would place themselves on mine. It's...crazy. This is my best friend, my sexy best friend. The best friend with the deep sea green eyes and the silver hair that hangs over his slightly pale skin. Everything about him seems to mesmerize me. I don't know why. These feelings only came about seven months ago, yet...they're so strong. Sigh, I have to tell him. I can't keep my best friend in the dark anymore.

"Mm...er..."

"Come on..."

"No, you come on."

"God, I hate sleeping with you."

"Then sleep on the floor."

"No, I'm the oldest so therefore it's my bed first."

"Who said that?"

"I did. Now move over and give me some covers."

"No."

"Okay then."

A kick was thrusted uponmy back and I tumbled to the floor with a thud. I sat up almost as quickly as I fell and glared at my blonde twin. "Hey, that's not fair Roxas!"

"Well you know what," he started as he leaned his upper body over the bed to look at me, "it's not fair that we have to sleep in the same bed." He smirked and went to go lay back on the bed, bundled in the tan cotton covers. I stood up off the floor, picked up a pillow, and smacked Roxas on the head with it.

"You really do suck Roxas," I said chuckling. Roxas laughed as he unraveled himself from the covers. He offered me some as we both became comfortable in the full-size bed again.

I woke up first and rubbed my eyes with a slight pout. The alarm clock rattled on the small wooden desk beside the bed, awaiting for someone to cease its actions. Withmy eyes barely opened, Ilooked at the digital alarm clock's big red numbers. It read 7:15. I grumbled at the early morning and finally turned off the annoying beeping. I swung my legs around and over the bed. My eyes squinted as the sun beamed into my cerulean eyes. I sighed. My body was so weak and I really didn't want to go to school that day. I laid back down on the bed and wrapped myself into a cotton cocoon. My mind began to wander off to who knows what. It began with school. I really wasn't in the mood to go. I hate the first few weeks of school. I always managed to get myself lost, no matter how long I've been at the school. I wonder if Riku and Kairi will be there. Hmm, Riku... I really did miss him over the summer. He had to go to visit his grandmother because she was dying of natural causes, thank God. Wait a minute, I still have to tell him about...yea.

I got out of the bed as fast as I could and ran into the bathroom. My clothes seemed to have been ripped off my tan skin and in no time, soap was on my body and water was pounding my back.

It didn't take long for me to come out of the chocolate brown and beige bathroom with a navy blue towel wrapped around my waist, a white one in my damp hair. Wet footprints left a path to my room and I shut the door behind me. Roxas was already awake and was picking out his school uniform. "Mornin' Sora."

"Hey Roxas." I ruffled the white towel in my hair, trying to get the unruly locks to dry. "Uh...Roxas..." I bit my lip. I really didn't know how to even start this off. I was nervous, let alone afraid of what Roxas would think. Roxas turned around and looked at me with anticipation. "I...kind of have this thing for Riku."

"Thing meaning?" His blonde right eyebrow raised slightly.

"Thing as in I like him...more than just friends."

"I figured," Roxas said as he turned back to the dresser.

I took the towel out of my hair and held to my chest lightly. "H-How?"

"Well, it's just some of the things you do when you're around him. I mean, I can see a certain thing happen with your eyes and your face and ears get really red. And besides, I'm your twin. I kind of know things about you that I sometimes don't want to know," he said with a smile on his face.

"...oh...is it that obvious?"

"Only to stupid people."

My body stiffened. I didn't know my feelings for Riku were so pronounced. How many people caught on as well? "Really?"

Roxas let out a hearty laugh. "No Sora. Ha ha, you're so fun to mess with."

I playfully tossed the towel at the Roxas's face and went to get ready for school.

x...x

The loud school bell rung, signaling that the ones not in class were marked late, me being one of them. I ran through the large halls in the brightly lit school, trying to be no later than I had to be. My light blue plaid tie flapped ferociously and soon flipped into my face. Stupid tie. My pace slowed down as I tried to get the tie away from my face. "Geez, I really do hate this thing." When the tie decided to no longer be stubborn, I flattened it down on my chest and continued my "journey" to my class. My head turned to the left and to the right. My eyes scanned over every room number, yet I had no luck finiding the one I needed.

A sigh escaped my lips as I leaned up against a near by wall and I dug through my pocket. I pulled out a folded piece of paper, unfolded it, and scanned over my new school schedule. "Ok, I'm in room 394 this period." I looked at the class numbers again on the wall ahead of me. "And I'm in the 374 area. Ugh!" I stuffed the paper back into my pocket and ran full speed to my class. Now you see why I hate this time of the school year. I finally made it to my class, completely out of breath.

My tanned hand reached out for the cold door knob and walked into the room. All eyes were on me and I felt my face get red with embarrassment as the teacher placed down her worn down piece of white chalk. "Mr. Hokkaido, you are a senior, no?" Her thick French accent almost confused me to no end, but I got through the accent and semi-translated what she said.

"Yes..."

"So you should know where things are by now." She scanned over my body. I noticed my clothes were a little astray from the constant running. "Fix your clothing, sign the late book, and take a seat."

With a solemn sigh, I put down my brown bookbag to retuck my shirt, straighten my annoying tie, and brush off any imaginary dust that might have gotten on me. I turned to my right and signed the late book grudgingly before gathering my belongings to take my seat.

"Eh Sora, I saved you a seat," Kairi said warmly.

I smiled and sat down in between my two best friends, Kairi on my left, Riku on my right.

"What took you so long, Sora? I thought you were dead," Riku said with a smirk on his face. That smirk almost made me melt.

"I was lost."

Riku simply shook his head chuckling and turned his attention back to the work on his desk.

"Here you go Sora," Kairi said as she passed me a work sheet. "Just fill out all the stuff you know from last year so she kind of knows where to begin with the lesson."

I nodded and after shuffling through my bookbag, I pulled out a black pen and wrote my name neatly in the top right corner. As I looked over the French, the letters seemed to mix and confuse me. All of the accent marks jumped around the page. I closed my eyes tight and shook my head, trying to get myelf together. I know I wasn't going crazy. I opened up my ocean-hued spheres and the letters were still jumbled.

Now, the letters decided to calm themselves down, but they only wrote out one name.

Riku

It repeated it some many times, I couldn't find any escape from the dreaded letters.

Riku

Riku

Riku

Riku

I gulped so I hard I thought I swallowed my tongue. What was going on with me? I turned my gaze away from the demon paper and to the silver-haired 19 year old. Maybe the paper was trying to tell me something. Who knows? I nudged his shoulder and Riku looked up from his paper. "Hmm?"

"Uh...what are you doing for lunch?"

"Oh, I'm going to the library. I have to look up some things."

"...oh..." I looked back at my paper with a rosy blush beginning to take residence on my cheeks. I couldn't help but think of the endless possibilities that could happen in that library when I revealed my feelings to him. I felt my ears get hot and I knew they were getting red as well. I guess that's what Roxas meant. "I'll probably...see you up there."

"Mmhmm."

The words on the page transformed back into their original language, no longer spelling out Riku's name. Thank the heavens.

x...x

Fifth period came along, the bell ringing. I gathered my things into my bookbag and slowly walked out of the door. I inhaled shakily. Fifth period meant lunch and that meant there was no more time for me to think it through. I made a left and walked down the seemingly endless hallway until I reached the west wing library. As I walked into the library, I decided not to sign in. There was simply no point. It's not like they actually checked the sign book anyway.

I readjusted the bookbag on my shoulders and walked down the well-lit room. My somewhat dingy black shoes scuffed onto the deep red carpet, sending a hiss of scratching noises throughtout the quiet library. A few faces turned to look at me. It made me a little nervous knowing that I was causing a slight disturbance. I looked to my left at the computer section. A few people were typing last minute papers, others just playing a game. Not one of the people over there were my silver-haired friend. I sighed slightly and continued to walk down the long, slender library.

I continued to scuff my way through the library until I got to the rows of book shelves. I peeped in between every shelf until I stopped in between the third and the fourth shelf. He stood there with a thick black book in his hands, all the while looking very scholastic. He flipped a page ever so gracefully. It made me gulp. Him reading a simple book made me blush. Simple things he did were just sexy to be frank. I fixed the bookbag on my shoulders and I exhaled heavily. I guess it was time to spill all my beans as I lose my marbles.

My legs seemed to be moving as slow as they could move as I made my way over to him. I guess he heard my feet dragging against the dingy carpet because he turned his head. When he noticed it was me, he gave me a small smile. "Hey Sora. I didn't think you were going to really come. Come here, I want to show you something," he said as he made a come here gesture with his right hand.

A smile crept its way onto my face and I seemed to gain more power to move my legs. I made it over to him with a few steps and stood beside him. He pointed to a section that read Hokkaido. I assume he was reading an encyclopedia or something. "See, I was looking up something and ended up finding your last name. It's a place in Japan." I looked beside the description and seen this really beautiful picture of part of Hokkaido. There were flowers of every hue and were lined up in such a way it reminded me of a rainbow.

"It's really pretty."

"Yeah..."

I turned my gaze away from the rainbow flowers to look at Riku. I had to bend my neck a little due to the height difference. His skin...geez. His skin was so alluring. It was somewhat pale, but it wasn't that ghostly pale. It was a creamy pale. Mmm...creamy... Ah, I need to stop while I'm ahead. I'm not here to think about his creamy skin and his lollipop green eyes and his cotton candy pink lips and his... Stop it Sora. There you go again!

Riku seemed to notice me staring at him because he looked at me with a slight smirk on his face. "Sora...?"

"Uh...hm?"

Riku let out a hushed laughed. "I swear I think there's nothing in this thing," he said as he tapped at my head.

I quickly folded my arms with a pout. "There is so something in there. I use it all the time."

He smiled again. "You look like a little kid when you pout like that." I couldn't help but pout again. It was just instinctual. He looked back at the book and flipped through the pages again, searching for I don't know what. I kept my gaze on him though. I just couldn't contain myself. My eyes began to flutter and I gulped. I went from his side and stood in front of him. I wanted to see the look on his face when I told him about my feelings for him.

"Riku..."

"Hmm?" He lifted his head out of the book with his eyes brows raised, waiting for me to continue.

"Uh..." I leaned on the book shelf behind me and twirled my fingers around. Even though I wanted to see the look on his face, I lowered my eyes. "I...I..." I had a serious lump in my throat. It was starting to get on my nerves. I lifted my eyes again and he just continued to look at me. I guess his calm face calmed me down. "I...think. No, I know...that I like you. It's more than just the simple friendship we've had for years, but its grown. It grown into something so much more. I can't say I'm in love with you...that's not it. I love you for who you are, but... Well simply, I like you... I guess more than I think I should."

I searched his eyes for something, something, but I couldn't find anything. I think I screwed up really bad.

He looked at me with that same calm look on his face. "When did this start?"

"I'd say...about seven months ago? Yeah, seven months ago."

Seven months ago was really weird. It was a frosty January evening and I ended up staying at Riku's house for the whole day because we were completely snowed in. His parents made us both hot chocolate. He added a little milk to his. I added milk, cinnamon, and marshmallows. He told me to come up to his room since his room was always warmer than the rest of the house. I took the red fleece blanket from off my shoulders and brung it along with me upstairs. When we made it up to his room, he shut the door behind him. I sat down on the bed and sipped my hot chocolate; I sighed at how it warmed my body. Riku sat down beside me and my head quickly fell to his shoulder. "Sleepy?"

I shook my head, not really wanting to speak. He wrapped his free hand around my waist and pulled me a little closer. I heard him take a long chug of his hot chocolate. "Ahh...you know my birthday's coming up right?"

"Of course! I can't forget it."

"Well, I was thinking about going somewhere. I don't know where yet, but I know I want you to come."

"...oh..."

He let me go and rested his upper half down on the bed. I looked back and noticed he had his eyes closed. Wow, did he look peaceful. It made my stomach flutter a little bit. I thought it was the hot chocolate, so I got up to set it down on the desk across from his bed. I decided to lay down on his bed and I situated myself so that I was lying on my side, a little too close to him. I held out my index finger and hovered it over his face as I traced out his features. Don't ask why. I just felt like it. But that wasn't the weird part.

The weird part was when I closed my eyes and slowly and softly kissed his lips. He jolted up and in the process spilled the remainder of his hot chocolate all over his body. "GOD DAMN IT!" He quickly got out of the hot clothing faster than I ever thought possible. With nothing but his boxers and his shirt on, he started screaming. "What the hell was that Sora?"

"I...uh...my head fell. I was nodding off. I'm sorry..."

He groaned as he looked through his dresser. He pulled out a pair of black flannel pajama pants and slid them on. He seemed to slam the coffee mug on the desk next to mine and sat down in the computer chair, starting up the computer. I felt so bad, let alone stupid. Why did I even kiss him?

"Riku..."

"Dont." He sighed heavily and started clicking away at the mouse.

That was the beginning of these new feelings. And it took me seven months to finally get it out.

Riku closed his eyes and when he opened them, he smiled warmly. "Why did it take you seven months to tell me?"

"Well...I was still confused about them. I didn't know what was going on. And I couldn't really talk to you about it because you were like...really pissed."

"Huh?" He tilted his head.

"It was that day I first kissed you. The day were snowed in."

"Ohh, I remember now," he said as he chuckled. "Yeah, I was pretty pissed that day."

We were kind of silent for a while. That couldn't be the end of the conversation. It just couldn't. I didn't even get a response from him yet. "So...how do you feel?"

With his free hand, he tapped my nose with his index finger. "You're adorable, you know that?"

I pouted. "Come on, man. Stop teasing."

"And I love that pout. That's the cutest thing ever." A blush quickly came across my cheeks and it only got redder as I felt his lips grace mine. Wow... I wasn't expecting that, but I know I wanted it. "And yeah, I like you too. And who knows, maybe we'll grow to love each other. Ok boyfriend?" I felt my cheeks get warmer. Boyfriend... I guess I'll have to get used to that title. I simply nodded. He smiled and placed the book back on the shelf behind me. "Come on, let's go to lunch. You just got me completely distracted from my work."

I couldn't help, but smile as we walked side by side out of the library.

x...x

Roxas just kept laughing and smirking at me as I told him what happened on the way home. He only laughed harder when I told him how hard I was blushing. I told him that I felt my face was literally on fire. He stopped walking entirely and dropped his bookbag as he kept on laughing. "Wow Sora, I never thought you were the girly type."

"Shut up. It's not that funny. I was nervous..."

"Yea, uh huh. Whatever you say Sora. Woo." He picked up his bookbag after getting all of his laughs out and continued walking. "But seriously, so you two are a couple now I guess?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I guess we've known each other for so long there's no point for the 'getting to know you' phase."

"Hmm, that makes sense." We walked in silence for a while. It was calming. The birds flew overhead and the calm wind gently blew past, making my hair and jacket flap in the wind. It felt good. I sighed softly and turned my attention to my left. Roxas was whistling some song I don't know. I wonder if he's going over to Namine's today.

"Um...Roxas?"

"Mmhmm?" He continued to whistle.

"Are you going to Namine's today?"

"Naw, I'm going to head over to Axel's today. I know he misses me."

I couldn't help the smile slowly coming across my face. I knew for sure Axel was missing Roxas. He always missed Roxas. Axel had this thing for Roxas. It was basically the same thing I have for Riku. Axel told Roxas about how he felt countless times, but Roxas didn't feel the same. I sometimes feel sorry for Axel. He loves Roxas like nothing on this planet, but Roxas found love in Namine. Makes me wonder if Riku told me he didn't feel the same way I did...

"See ya Sora."

"Huh?" I got out of my thoughts and back to reality to see that Roxas was crossing the street. "Where are you going?"

"I said I was going to go see Axel."

"Oh," I said with a retarded smile on my face. "Tell him I said hi."

"I always do," he screamed back as he continued his walk to Axel's.

I smiled, readjusting my bookbag for the thousandth time. I looked up at the sun slightly. I always liked the sun while Roxas liked the moon. It was just something about it that made me feel good inside. Roxas said that the moon shown that even in the dark, there's some kind of light. I shrugged. The moon was ok, but the sun shown eternal light and it was the reason for the moon's light in the first place.

I stood on the curb, ready to cross the street. A bus zoomed by followed by two cars. When the street was clear, I was about to cross the street when my phone went off. I pulled the little device out of my pocket and clicked the little ball on my BlackBerry. I got a text. I unlocked my keypad, went to my messages, and clicked on the unopened message. It was from Riku and it simply said:

uh i kno this is new but i luv u pouty face

I stepped onto the sidewalk and kept walking home.

luv u 2 cotton candy

In no less than a minute, I got a text back.

cotton candy?

yea, thats what i think of when i c ur lips, I wrote with a cotton candy colored blush on my face. I soon got a text back.

lol

I giggled to myself as I stuffed my phone in my pocket after locking it. Wow, I couldn't wait to see how this was going to turn out.