Chapter One: Hell's This About?

The hell? What the fuck're you all doing here? Did the idiot put you up to this? If he did, no way in effing hell am I telling you a fucking story. I'd shit a brick before I do. Great. Now you're all giggling. What the hell is with girls and giggling? All right, you know what? I'll just tell you to shut you all up and get it over with. So you all better listen up, because I'm not going to be repeating any of this.

It was raining and I was pissed. I was pissed because just after I beat the last of the damn assassins—on a freezing winter night during which I'd much rather be in my fucking bed instead of scaling a rooftop—the freaking princess those assassins were coming after sent me out of my freaking country. How was that showing gratitude in any form at all? And to top it off, she put some sort of weird mark on my forehead….the damn thing was giving me a headache.

And then suddenly there were these random people in this random hellhole of a place in front of me and around me. What the FUCK was going on? Tomoyo would pay for this one way or the other. I took in the surroundings. There was the creepy woman staring at me with holier-than-thou eyes….a kid hugging a girl like he wanted to jump her bones, but was afraid she'd die before he got a chance to…..and this….guy in a big, fluffy coat that no dignity-retaining man should ever wear.

Okay, you know what? SHUT THE HELL UP. Has anyone ever told you how annoying that gasping-wide-eyed-ZOMG-ing thing you do is? And NO I didn't think the big, fluffy coat made him look—look…..the word you just said! No not that one, the one that began with an s which I will no way in HELL'S NAME repeat. You're all reading way too much girly stuff. Our first meeting? Yeah, no shit happening there. I saw him, I learned his name, and then we were off.

Although I did think he had some badass blue eyes.