Disclaimer: i dont own greys' and if i did, i wouldnt have to be writing on this sight, because you would be watching my material week in and week out.

Summary:

okay so this is the much anticipated sequel to my girl... we left off with Meredith alone looking after 4 babies.

somethings have changed, somethings remain the same, but it doesnt mean we can wake up from this nightmare and be okay.

written for b!

She doesn't look, she doesn't see
Opens up for nobody
Figures out, she figures out
Narrow line, she can't decide
Everything short of suicide
Never hurts, nearly works

Something is scratching it's way out
Something you want to forget about

A part of you that'll never show
You're the only one that'll ever know
Take it back when it all began
Take your time, would you understand
What it's all about
What it's all about

Something is scratching it's way out
Something you want to forget about
No one expects you to get up
All on your own with no one around

Something is scratching it's way out
Something you want to forget about
No one expects you to get up
All on your own with no one around

It had been 6 months:

6 moNths of not seeing her

6 months of having an empty bed

6 months of private photos

6 months of crank calls just to hear her voice.

... And now today, today that was all going to change.

She didnt expect to be welcomed back with open arms.

Didnt expect so much as a smile.

She didnt really expect everything

"6 months" was all she could think.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

Meredith closed her eyes as she took in a deep breath. She had a feeling about today. She felt like something was going to happen, and she really didnt need it.

Finally she opened her eyes and gathered up enough strength to open up her car door and move to the back of the car where she removed the 4 person stroller that her father had bought her. She then wheeled it around to the sliding door and began to load her children into it.

It pained her that she was doing this alone. Especially when she unloaded Harry and looked at his feiry red hair.

She ran her hand over his locks before giving him a soft kiss.

She then continued to pack the stroller with everything the babies would need while they were in daycare. Once done, she closed her eyes again, taking in another breath, before locking her car door and moving, with her children, towards the hospital

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

She watched her closely, she could see her pain. She couldn't help but notice how empty she looked. How robotic her movements had become.

She hated that she had turned into a machine, and yet knew, it was all because of her.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGGA

Meredith was greeted at the hospital doors by her father, who was only more than happy that his daughters maternity leave was now finished, but also that she would now have something to keep her mind from wandering.

Richard greeted her with a kiss on the cheek before taking the diaper bag that was hanging off of his daughters shoulder.

He looked up, he could have sworn that someone had been watching them, but he couldn't see anyone.

Forcing a smile, he tried to ignore how hollow his daughter now looked.

They walked through the hospital. Richard was trying to ignore the niggling fact that he had an appointment booked, but with no name supplied for the booking. And Meredith, well she was trying to fight the feeling that was beginning to consume her.

People greeted them, gushed at the babies, and kept moving. Meredith faked a smile, knowing that people had been talking about Addie's disappearance, and about the person she had become.

They dropped the babies off at the day care. Meredith was very thorough, handing over the schedule for her children, with feeding times and nap times allocated.

Meredith couldn't help but e nervous with the fact that she was leaving her children. She had not spent a day apart from them, she had never left them with anyone. They were all she had left.

Trying to keep her emotions under control, she straightened her shoulders, and Richard watched as her face turned stone cold. He eyes glazed over with a darkness he had never seen before.

Richard gestured that they needed to leave, and guided her out of the room.

He knew that he needed to make it to the appointment that he had scheduled. Regretting this, he left his daughter at the residents lounge to meet with her friends, knowing that they had to find a way to brig her back to life.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

She sat inside his office. She knew that he would fight her presence, and with the state Meredith was in, she could very well understand it. But she was back. That was the important factor here, she was back, and now that was all that mattered.

She heard the door open and she closed her eyes in anticipation. She knew that the person had stopped on recognising her.

"Addison" he said in shock.

"Richard" she replied, and tried to smile despite the fact that she was still very much broken.