I know that the discovery channel is super old but it just came to me the other day and I thought that if I changed the words it WOULD be something that Emmett would say to piss Bella and Edward off.

Emmett's POV

I bounded down the stairs at the sound of Charlie's cruiser driving up our long driveway.

I had been planning this all night much to Rose's disappointment, I will have to make it up to her tonight by upping my performance. Nessie ran to the door to open it and let Charlie in, so, I started up singing the discovery channel song, otherwise known as The Bad Touch by bloodhound gang.

"Can't Do it now
Bella and Eddie ain't nothin' but mammals
But they can't do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Still can't do it now
Bella and Eddie ain't nothin' but mammals
But they can't do it like they do on the Discovery Channel
Their not Gettin' horny n-"

As I sung, Bella glared at me, Alice had already warned me not to do this when she saw me plan to sing it but, she didn't know what day I was going to sing it; the day Charlie was visiting.

As Bella and Edward had arrived around a minute before Charlie, Edward hadn't had a chance to catch up with me because Nessie was showing Bella something and Edward was too dumbfounded in what she was showing Bella to play any attention to me. Then once Nessie finished, when Charlie had gotten here, Bella spoke to Edward keeping him out of my way for even longer.

Out of nowhere Jasper and Jacob tackled me, pushing me out through the big glass window.

"Shit, what just happened? Are they Ok?" I heard Charlie ask Bella.

"Don't worry dad, they'll be fine. Need to know basis remember." Bella answered, trying to kid the pissed of note in her voice, that I'm guessing is directed at me.

From somewhere inside, I heard Esme sigh sadly about the broken window. Twice in a month that the window has been broken. Hmm, both times have involved me, woops.

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