The young, raven haired boy smiled. He was looking at his friend, a tall child with auburn hair that nearly covered his vivid green eyes. The dark haired boy was hiding behind a tree and waiting for his friend to notice him. Green eyes pierced brown ones and the tall boy pointed at the one who was hiding.

"I found you, Ash!"

Ash laughed and sped away. His sneakers moved swiftly and silently over the damp morning grass. He heard his breath come out in short bursts of air as he ran as fast as he could go. The sun winked down at him through various shades of emerald leaves. Sweat dripping down his back, lungs crying out for mercy, Ash stopped running.

He turned back, expecting to see his friend. No one was there. Ash's triumphant smile faded as he stared down the trail he had come from. There was only shadows and greenery. The forest was silent; Pidgeys didn't chirp, nor did Caterpies scuttle noisily across dried earth. Ash didn't feel the sun warming his skin any more.

"Gary?" he called out, voice wavering. "I give up. You can tag me now."

There was no response and the nine, almost ten, year old boy shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. The wind whistled and coiled around his limbs. Ash felt blood pounding in his ears as he stared at the foliage around him. Were those just shadows from the trees, or something more? His stomach clenched and unclenched as anxiety built up in him. He wanted to run away, but he couldn't move his legs; he couldn't feel any part of his body. The monsters had gotten to him.

Ash Ketchum began to cry...

Ash sat bolt upright and let out a ragged gasp. His eyes flickered open and were bathed in darkness. His hands were peachy blobs gripping at the brisk night air, looking for comfort. He snapped to and struggled to silence his heavy breathing.

"Ash?" There came a sleepy murmur from the pink sleeping bag to his far right. A head of messy aqua hair popped up and a girl stared at him.

He looked away from her concerned gaze, hoping she would go back to sleep. That wasn't the case; he heard shuffling sounds and knew Dawn was coming to him. He didn't want that, he honestly didn't. But the thought of someone being there—

She appeared before him, crouched at the foot of his sleeping bag. Her face was rosy with sleep, and her eyes sparkled in the dim light of the moon. She brushed hair back from her face with an impatient swipe. Ash almost smiled; Dawn would regret this in the morning. She hated for him to see her without makeup on.

"What's wrong?" her voice was businesslike as she studied him. "Did you have that...dream again?"

"No."

She stared at him, brow furrowed. He looked away. She thought that he was lying. Ash had lied to her many times before; he lied about little things, he lied about the biggest thing. But he wasn't lying now. He would've argued, but it wouldn't make a difference to him. All the lines between dreams and reality, of fact and fiction, were extremely blurred for Ash Ketchum.

"Go back to sleep." He gave her a diluted smile, hoping to appease her. Dawn looked as if she were either about to cry or slap him.

She stretched out a hand. "You can't keep acting like this, Ash."

"Acting like what?" his tone was unintentionally sharp and she flinched. He ignored her outstretched hand, an offering of friendship to the untrained eye. But Ash knew that she wanted more. People always wanted more.

"Please," she begged, "tell me what's wrong. I could help you. I want to make things okay for you."

"Things are okay." He gazed at the spot above her nose, feigning eye contact. "What isn't okay is the fact that you're talking so loudly. You'll wake up Pikachu." He didn't bother to include Brock; they both knew the guy slept like the dead.

Her tone was accusing. "You're not normal. You have issues!"

"Things are okay," he repeated.

She responded by grabbing his shoulders and crushing her lips against his. He flinched but didn't pull away. Dawn thought he was finally accepting her advances and moved her lips more roughly against his. He didn't respond; Ash had shut down. When she realized that he wasn't moving, she pulled away and glared at him with sky blue eyes. Tears trickled down her face as she got up and slowly walked back to her sleeping bag. Ash watched her go, wanting to call her back and explain everything. But as always, the memories wrapped around his vocal cords and cut off his voice. He flung himself unto his back and stared dully up at the sky. He wouldn't be able to get back to sleep that night.

You're not normal, Dawn had said. Maybe now he wasn't, but five years ago he had been. The old ache began to swell in his chest and he shut his eyes tightly. He would not think of that; he would not think of him. The past needed to remain in his dreams, in his nightmares.

The next morning it was eerily quiet during breakfast. Brock tried to make small talk, but Dawn only gave one word answers while Ash didn't respond at all. Brock slammed a can of Pokeblocks down on a log in frustration and they jumped at the sound.

"What's the matter with you two?" he said wearily. "You guys always talk non stop. Better kiss and make up before I make you do it!"

"Kiss and make up, huh?" Dawn murmured, playing with a daisy in her lap. Her head was bowed as she observed the delicate white petals. "I don't think he wants to do that."

Ash put his untouched plate to the side. "I do." He turned to face Dawn with a bright smile; he was the polar opposite of what he had been last night. "I'm really sorry about yesterday, Dawn. I just wasn't—"

"It's fine." Dawn sounded surprised by the sudden change in his demeanor. "I guess I was a bit pushy. I didn't mean...the things I said."

"I know."

"Pikachu pi," Pikachu squeaked, bored with the conversation. Ash smiled at the electric mouse and stroked him between the ears.

Brock wrinkled his nose. "Well, that was surprisingly easy." All the lines of concern vanished from his face, leaving it as smooth and tanned as before. "Since things are okay, I have something to tell you guys."

"Yeah?" Dawn popped a berry into her mouth, gaze fixed on Ash. He caught her eye and gave her a charming smile. Her heart fluttered in her chest. The Ash that had been so distant wasn't real. The happy Ash, the smiling Ash, the true Ash; he would come to love her as she loved him in time, she just knew it.

"Are you paying attention?" Brock snapped, crossing his arms. They both nodded and he gave a loud sigh. "I think that I'm in love!"

"God, Brock!" Dawn rolled her eyes heavenward. "You made it sound so serious. I thought you were going to leave us or something."

"Did you not hear me?" He paused and raised his arms above his head. "I'm in love!" A gooey smile crept onto his face and Dawn and Ash exchanged concerned glances. "And it's not with Nurse Joy or Officer Jenny this time, either."

Dawn narrowed her eyes. "Are you stalking this poor girl? Should I be worried?"

"No. She likes me too! I met her online and we're going to meet for lunch today. "

Ash paused midway through stroking Pikachu. "Online?"

"Ugh!" Dawn squealed in mock horror. "Brock, I can't imagine the lies you must've told her! Did you edit your picture or something?"

"For saying that, you'll never eat any of my delicious meals again." Brock pouted and Dawn giggled. "And no, I didn't alter my image. Why would I have to? I'm a handsome young lad."

Ash felt the strange feeling fizz through his veins. Someone else had been handsome, someone that he had trusted. Emerald eyes, auburn hair, that quirky grin...the feel of his hands...the feel of his touch; Ash felt heat flood to his face and he clutched at his stomach, which had begun churning. He was sick and disturbed for thinking such things. He was a horrible person.

"Ash?"

He heard a worried voice; it sounded so far away. Ash squeezed his eyes shut as the repetitions of his name grew fainter and fainter. Everything around him disappeared.

...Tears rolled down his cheeks as he stood in the clearing. Why had Gary left him here? They were best friends, weren't they? They had promised to stick together, hadn't they? Ash kept his eyes shut. He didn't want to see the shadows of the trees, of the monsters, creeping closer and closer. It felt as if he were sinking into the ground. If he fell far enough, no one would ever find him.

"Ash?"

He didn't open his eyes. He refused to look into the eyes of a demon and see his image reflected there. If he was going to die, he wasn't going to be a sissy. All the other guys already talked about him and thought he was a baby, even though Gary denied that they said those things.

Hands landed on his shoulders, gentle as butterfly wings. The heat seeped into his bones and his eyelids fluttered open. Gary stared back at him, his face an inch from Ash's. Ash felt a wave of relief wash over his body when he saw that his best friend was there.

Gary kept his hands on Ash for a moment longer, before yanking them away as if he realized he wasn't acting like a "man."

"Come on, Ash," Gary said gruffly. "Let's go to your house. Your mom made cookies, right? I deserve them after spending half my life looking for you."

Tears slid down Ash's cheeks and Gary's eyes followed their downward path as if hypnotized. Gary reached out a grubby hand and swiped the drops of salt water away. Ash felt tingles shoot up his spine and he let out a shaky breath.

"Yeah, my mom made cookies."

Gary's hands still cradled his face. Ash avoided the green eyes of his best friend; he was confused about what he felt when he looked into them. He wasn't sure what was happening between them, but Gary was twelve. Gary knew what he was doing, right?

Ash felt hot breath near his lips and he stood there, waiting for something he didn't understand. There suddenly came the shouts of boys from nearby and Gary stepped back from Ash nonchalantly. Ash was rooted to the spot, lips slightly parted.

Gary gave him a friendly shove. "Don't just stand there, you idiot. Let's go!"

He began walking forward and Ash followed, thinking nothing would ever make him feel as bewildered as when his best friend's eyes were looking into his...

Author's note/warning: This story is going to contain mature subject matter, so if you can't read "serious" things than you should stop here. Palletshipping is definitely in this(hence the category of Romance), so if the idea of two boys being with each other makes you feel uncomfortable, please move on to more suitable material. I hope you enjoy reading this! I don't own Pokemon in any shape or form.