AN: This lovely miniature lop-eared plot bunny was given me by my husband, albeit in teasing. Nevertheless, I have accepted it with love. :) (I always kind of think of plot bunnies as looking something like Elliot from "Friendly Hostility.")

Ereign

Damn L! Every step Light took, no matter how minor, he had to take care of the pitfalls and traps that L had liberally scattered like salt on an icy sidewalk. Nothing was safe, not even this.

"Well, Yagami-kun? What shall it be? With or without?" The goblin in human skin was peering intently at him, that stupid finger on his lips, eyes wide in a completely faux childish innocence that L was so adept at creating. It just made Light all the more certain that this was a trap. And this trap, though it had every appearance of being nothing more than a general inquiry was still that – a trap. Light had to move carefully.

"I need a moment to decide, Ryuuga," he spoke with a calculatedly pensive air.

"Of course, Yagami-kun," L graciously allowed. And then he just stood there and watched.

He's expecting me to reveal something here, expecting me to make a judgment affected by my being Kira. He's already suspicious of me. I don't think there's any chance of erasing that suspicion by my answer here. So the only thing I can do is keep him from becoming more suspicious.

You're wondering what to do, Light Yagami. You know this is a test. You know that, based on your answer here, I could be one step closer to determining that you are Kira. So you will be choosing very carefully while trying to make it appear that it is not such a deliberation.

My natural inclination would be to choose "without," not just as Kira, but as Light Yagami. So there's no reason why choosing that should raise suspicion against me.

Knowing your nature, you would most certainly choose "without." And while it would not be an unusual choice for Light Yagami, it would certainly be a most Kira-like decision.

Knowing L, though, if I do choose "without," even though it would be the natural choice for Light Yagami, he would still attribute it to being a decision driven by Kira and it will raise the suspicion against me.

Perhaps you assume that I will attribute a choice of "without" to be Kira-ish. Therefore, you would choose "with" – but that is too obviously a ploy. And since your answer cannot be "without" either …

… that means that there is no answer I can give here that won't raise suspicion against me. Damn him! It was a much better test than Light had initially given credit to. Deceptively easy, but subtle and poisonous. Just like L.

You're trapped, Light Yagami. There's no way out.

But…. Light smiled to himself, suddenly hit with the solution. Never forget, L, there is always a third option.

The whole time, Light had maintained a face of consideration, absorbed by the choice set before him. Now he gave a little nod and smiled, showing he'd come to his conclusion.

"Half, Ryuuga."

L blinked. His face showed little but it was enough for Light to see that his answer had surprised L. "Half, Yagami-kun?"

Light nodded an affirmative. "Yes, I'd like sprinkles on only half of the cone. You see, I don't have ice cream very often and I've never had sprinkles before. So I'd like to try them, but in case I don't like it I think it would be better to have them on only half. Don't you agree?"

Impressive, Light Yagami. I gave you two options and you found a third to by-pass them. Fine then. You've eluded me here, but I will catch you, one way or another.

L nodded to Light. "I suppose that does make sense. Very well, then. Watari, please put sprinkles on only half of Yagami-kun's ice cream cone."

"Understood." The two rivals stood facing each other, silently sizing one another up until Watari returned and handed them their desserts. Just as Light was taking his first tentative bite, L spoke with a tiny smirk, eyes glittering with challenge.

"So, then, Yagami-kun, shall it be coffee, or tea?"

AN: Hooray for crack! :)

Originally written 20 Oct. '08