Sorry it's taken me so long to update, this is a chapter to connect a few dots and get us going to where I want us to be, reviews are always appriciated so please take a moment just to let me know what you think?? Thanks guys xxxx

He sat and watched her sleep, she looked so peaceful. The bruise that had placed itself firmly on her cheek was a constant reminder of the fact that someone had had their hands on her.

Elliot watched as the doctors moved in and out of the room,

"How is she?" he looked up as Cragen walked in.

Elliot shook his head.

"She's stupid," he sighed, "She discharged herself, that's why she collapsed she wasn't ready..."

"Is that why? I thought it had something to do with the fact that you were screaming blue murder at her," as he spoke Elliot hung his head slightly. "I don't know what's happened with you two..."

"It's complicated," he shook his head and turned back to Olivia. He was a bastard. He'd been trying to hurt her, the way that she'd hurt him, he knew he'd regret it and he knew she'd be mad but he didn't expect her to collapse in his arms. As he held her and gently brushed the hair from her face, she looked so vulnerable and he'd never hated himself more.

"You wanted to punish her for leaving?" Cragen asked.

Elliot looked up. He didn't say a word,

"You two have been through a lot together Elliot, she'll kill me for saying this but you're all she has."

"She's all...she's all I have-"

"You have the kids Elliot, that case...it hit you both hard, it happens to all partners,"

"No..." he closed his eyes. He still dreamt about Ryan. He couldn't get the little boys face out of his head,

"You lost a kid Elliot, it's always hard – blaming yourself-"

"I'd do it again," he admitted.

Cragen looked slightly confused.

"I would chose Liv over a victim-"

"And she'd chose you,"

"How can you just accept that- people will die because of us," he shook his head, didn't the older man hear what he was saying?

"No, you save people Elliot, you and Olivia...you're two of the best. Think of the amount of people you've saved compared to those you've lost."

"I don't want her to get hurt again," he'd never been so honest with his captain, never so honest with himself. As much as he couldn't stand the thought of losing another victim, the thought of losing her overwhelmed him.

"Then don't be the one to do it," Cragen told him softly. "Tell her I called?" he asked.

Elliot nodded as Cragen left. He turned back to the woman lying in front of him.

**

Danny was sat with Fin, waiting for news on Olivia. They'd been asked to stay in the 1-6,

"She'll be fine," Fin told him, trying to reassure the younger man.

He nodded,

"What's Stabler's problem with her?" he asked, "Were they...were they together?"

"No, they were never like that."

"He's you're friend?" Daniel asked, unable to say what he was going to say. There was something about Stabler he didn't like, the way Olivia was when he was mentioned. The way he'd been with her before she collapsed. It was like she was terrified of him, and he wanted to know why.

"Uh, yeah they both are-" Fin sighed, he'd had his fair share of arguments with Elliot, but he was a friend.

"I should be there with her," Daniel sighed as he looked through an old case file. "But I guess Stabler would have something to say about that?" he asked.

Fin shrugged. He knew if Elliot wanted to be with Olivia there was no way he would allow anyone else to take his place.

**

Olivia opened her eyes slowly, her head was throbbing.

"Hey," she heard the soft voice. she knew she was dreaming. She couldn't quite remember how she'd got there, but she knew there was no chance Elliot was by her side. She'd fooled herself too many times already to start thinking he would be there again, "Liv?" she heard his voice again and as she finally came to she saw him,

"Elliot..." she mumbled.

He gave her a soft smile.

"What happened?" she asked, still confused as to why he was being so nice to her.

"You uh, you discharged yourself early and your body decided it wasn't such a good idea, gave us all a bit of a scare." He told her, slightly relieved that she didn't remember him laying into her.

"I'm sorry," she told him, she hoped he understood. She was sorry for leaving him, for not coming back. She needed him to understand that she had to go away to protect him, to protect anyone else from getting hurt because she couldn't put aside her feelings for him. She couldn't stand the thought of him hating her.

"You're sorry for collapsing?" he asked. He tried to smile.

She bit her lip and looked away.

"You okay? Are you in pain?"

"No, I'm good," she lied.

"I didn't realise you were hurt so badly," he told her.

She looked at him. What was he talking about? Physically? Emotionally?

"Uh yeah he really beat the crap out of me," she was embarrassed to admit that she'd yet again needed protecting. She knew what he would be thinking, he'd yelled at her before telling her that he didn't want to keep watching her back, she thought she didn't need him to...obviously she was wrong, she would've laughed at the irony if it didn't hurt so much. She winced slightly as she tried to shift in the bed.

"You okay?" he put his hand over hers.

She pulled away quickly.

He looked up at her, "Sorry," he mumbled.

She looked away from him. He'd just touched her, the first time since they'd slept together. She blushed remembering how it felt to have his hands all over her,

"Uh..."

"I should go," Elliot stood up, unable to face the fact that she couldn't stand to be touched by him, he'd been awful to her he knew that, but while she was sleeping he released exactly how much he missed her.

He was angry at himself for treating her the way that he had and he wanted to make it up to her. He forgave her, he didn't know when but he forgave her for leaving...and he didn't want to watch her walk away again...why couldn't he tell her?

She wanted to tell him to stay, she wanted him to sit with her, she finally felt normal again at his side. She was about to ask him to speak when Daniel walked in,

"Liv, how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay," she told him, wishing he'd waited just a little bit longer, apparently Elliot felt the same way.

"Can you uh, can you give us a few minutes?" he asked.

Daniel saw the expression on her face. The same pained expression she had whenever Elliot was around, what the hell was this guy doing to her.

"Uh, I just need to talk to my partner,"

"Don't you mean my partner?" Daniel asked, staring Elliot in the eye.

"Is there a problem?"

"I dunno Stabler, you about to lay into my partner again?" if the younger man was intimidated he sure as hell wasn't showing it.

"Daniel-" Olivia tried to interrupt,

"I'm sorry but I don't get why you aren't telling this guy to get out- he's treated you like crap since you got back, God knows what he did to make you leave,"

"You need to shut your mouth," Elliot squared up to him,

"What are you gonna do? Hit me? That why Liv's terrified of you?" He spat.

"Whoa!" Liv threw her hand in the air trying to get the attention of her partners, past and present. "No Daniel-"

"You don't have to stand up for him I've figured it out, we were here for 5 weeks and you didn't want anything to do with him, it makes sense now."

As he spoke Elliot roughly grabbed him by the throat,

"I would never touch her...like that." He told the younger man,

"Anger management issues Stabler? You ever had her against the wall like this?"

Elliot flinched, he had her pinned against the wall at her apartment, but not violently. He'd never hurt her, although he must have hurt her when he pinned her against the wall.

He'd kissed her then, more passionately than he'd ever kissed anyone before and here was this kid accusing him of physically hurting her.

"You have done this to her, you son of a bitch."

"Stop it." Olivia told them both as she struggled to get out of the bed,

"Stay there Liv-" Elliot told her, scared she would hurt herself. He let go of Daniel,

"Don't tell her what to do," Daniel stood in front of his partner,

"Danny you've got it wrong okay, Elliot would never hurt me." She spoke softly,

"I see the way you look at him you're scared." Daniel didn't understand why she wouldn't just admit that he'd hurt her.

Olivia got out of the bed and walked towards them both. Both she and Elliot could understand why the younger man was confused, Olivia was frightened...not of Elliot but of her feelings for him, and Elliot knew that he'd treated her badly and he knew that he had a habit of lashing out at her, just never physically.

"Elliot could you give us a minute?" she asked.

He walked out slowly.

"Daniel, It's complicated, but Elliot would never lay a finger on me." She told her young partner, "He's a good man." She looked Daniel in the eye, "We've been partners for a long time, and we've been through a lot,"

Daniel walked her back to her bed, "I...I was so sure." He sighed,

"I promise you, he's hard...impossible sometimes but he would never lay a finger on a women,"

"Then what the hell happened? You've been in this crazy mind frame since we got back to Manhattan – that was five weeks ago."

"I know, I just...things happened and I wasn't ready to deal with it. We lost a kid..." she admitted, "And when something like that happens you pick it out on the only other person who understands," she explained, finally realising herself exactly why Elliot had reacted the way that he had when Ryan died.

**

Daniel had long since left and Olivia was asleep, watching her sleep brought him such relief, she couldn't run away from him while she was in front of him, eyes closed, chest rising and falling softly.

"Mmmm."

He sat up slightly as she frowned and began to moan, was she having a bad dream? He looked around wondering what he should do,

"No..."

His eyes shot up, what was she dreaming about? She had once confided in him that she had dreamt of being assaulted, something that chilled him to the bone. Was she having that dream again? A chill ran down his spine, he'd faced many demons because of his career but he had his sex to fall behind. Of course there were male rape victims but the majority were women and related to Olivia, perhaps this was why she'd had the nightmares? He looked at her, hoping that wasn't what she was dreaming.

"No...Elliot..."

His heart stopped as he heard his voice. She had nightmares about him? An overwhelming sense of guilt washed over him, what the hell had he done to her? He reached for her hand but changed his mind pulling away, he watched as her face twisted and changed as her nightmare became more intense and he couldn't help it, he placed his hand gently on top of hers and the frown disappeared. He gently rubbed her hand with his thumb, silently promising that he would make it up to her, no matter what it took.

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