Sesshomaru and InuYasha
Chapter #1: Why Must You Hurt Me So?

(Copywrited from the Shattered)

It was night in the forest of the western lands, and its lord was at unrest. The night was growing later, morning fast approaching. The moon, full overhead, cast a dim light on the surrounding cherry blossom trees, adding to the soft, almost romantic quality of the night. The air was of decent temperature, neither too hot, nor too cold. Sesshomaru glanced up at the moon, his golden eyes softening ever so gently at the effect of the night. Jaken, and the beast Ah-Un, were back at his castle, giving the human child, Rin, a bath. He, however, was not interested in such mundane tasks as washing the child; his intent was on patrolling his forest, and discovering the source of the odd, feminine scent that was in it. He had been out of several hours so far, scouring the forest. As of late, he had found nothing more concerning then the occasional usajii-youkai, or rabbit demon. The scent, however, came from none of them, but from something more obsolete- different. Sighing to himself in defeat, the lord of the western lands planted himself at the base of one of the larger trees, the long trellises of his hair cascading on the mossy bed underneath him. Sniffing in again deeply, he tried once more to determine the whereabouts of the peculiar smell. It was familiar to him, almost like a welcomed presence. It disturbed him, however, that he couldn't find where the aroma originated from. Closing his eyes, the youkai succumbed to the peaceful nothingness of sleep.

At the edge of the forest, a campfire was lit, and one lone, canine looking figure sat before it, arms wrapped firmly around the body. Upon close inspection, snow white hair glistened in the moonlight, complimented by beautiful, golden eyes. However, there was a rare glimpse of sadness in them, almost a scream echoing in their golden pools, creating a tsunami of hurt and pain. Glancing up at the moon, the same one his half-brother had just been glancing upon, he sighed longingly, and then he too, relinquished himself to shattered dreams.

The next morning came too early for Sesshomaru. Groaning with stiffness, he lurched to a standing position, pulling loose bits of leaves and twigs out of his long mane. Grumbling, his catlike eyes squinted as he glanced in the direction of the now rising sun, attempting to determine what time it was. Grimacing, he started briskly walking to his home.

InuYasha also was awaking from his slumber. Sighing, he lifted from his moss bed, and gathered his few possessions, before setting off again, alone. He headed in the direction of a large citadel- the mansion of the western lands; Sesshomaru's home. Passing the dense forest surroundings, InuYasha strode quietly over the landscape, his long, slender legs carrying him quickly over the distance. Pausing at a decent sized brook, InuYasha quickly glanced around to see if the area was uninhabited. Finding nothing more then a few butterflies, he quickly disrobed, then stepped into it, slowly lowering himself into its serene depths with a contented sigh. Dunking his head under the waves, he scrubbed his scalp vigorously with something Kagome called "Shampoo". To him however, it smelt funny, like orange peels. Dunking his head back under the water, he relaxed momentarily, enjoying the feeling of the water around him. His senses dulled by the strong shampoo scent, he had not smelt the approach of his brother.

On the way back to his castle, Sesshomaru came across a beautiful, rich scent, one that made him simply purred with delight. Ears flicking forward in interest, he strayed from his original path to investigate where this smell originated from. After about 20 paces in the smells direction, his acute ears picked up the sound of running water. Stepping closer still, he peered through the thick green foliage. His golden eyes warmed instantly as they took in the sight of his brother- InuYasha. A happy smile replaced the typical frown on his face, as he quietly observed the currently naked form of his younger brother.

Oblivious, InuYasha continued his serene relaxation. His dog ears, wet from the water, twitched slightly at the sound of a cracking branch. Passing it off for a deer, he ignored it, and relaxed further. He sighed softly, and then reached down into the water's depths, his clawed hand reaching down for his now erected member.

Sesshomaru came in the same instance, nearly crying out with his brother. Biting his lower lip, it began to bleed, trickling down his pale skin. Slipping his hand out of his kimono, Sesshomaru licked the droplets of cum off his fingers, before retying his Obi. Stepping backwards, he jumped as he heard a loud crack. Realizing he had stepped on a stick, he cursed softly, as he had now announced his presence. Even in such a relaxed state of mind, InuYasha surely must have heard.

Hearing the snap, InuYasha jumped to his senses, and growled, looking about. "Who's there? Come the fuck out, whoever the hell you are!"

Sesshomaru grimaced, the mutter to himself. "Oh shit..."

Emerging cautiously from his hiding place, Sesshomaru slowly stepped through the leafy tapestry that had originally covered him. Gazing at InuYasha, he continued forward cautiously, his steps almost hesitant, as if he had to mentally force each step. He inched closer and closer to his brother, his eyes tracing the grass. Recalling the scene that had just passed before him, only sheer moments ago, and the tips of his ears tinged a gentle pink, in addition to the slight warmth that now donned his cheeks. He stopped about five paces from where InuYasha was still submerged in the brook.

InuYasha was in shock- his eyes were like dinner plates- large and glazed over. Like Sesshomaru, he sported a bright blush that spread across his nose, and ran over both his slender cheeks. Struggling to rise, InuYasha moved his mouth wordlessly, his lips parting and closing several times before he cleared his throat with a barely audible 'ahem'. Finally rising up from the water, InuYashas' finely sculpted chest was clearly visible, little droplets of water running down from his shoulders, making small ripples in the water that barely concealed his lower half. After several more awkward moments, InuYasha muttered a single word. "Sessy?"

Sesshomaru was too enraptured by his brothers' bare chest to move. He was riveted to the spot, his eyes tracing his brothers' almost feminine curves, sliding down the finely toned muscles. His blush deepened- changing from a sakura blossom pink, to the red of a rose. Blinking, Sesshomaru gazed deeply into InuYashas' eyes, seemingly drinking from their depth. Remembering himself, Sesshomaru blinked several times, trying to regain his aloof composure. "Ooh, it's just you, InuYasha. I thought I heard a female youkai in heat, but all find is my sniveling mutt of a brother." A little bit of blood trickled down from the corner of Sesshomaru's lip, from where he bit it to keep himself from moaning too loudly.

"But, Sessy, didn't you just..." His eyes flicked over Sesshomaru in worried confusion. InuYasha's ears tilted downwards, giving a visual display of the worry he felt inside. InuYasha has just masturbated to the thought of his brother- and now here he was, standing right in front of him, knowing exactly what he had done. A shameful blush tinged his face, as he lowered his eyes to gaze at the ground right below Sesshomaru's feet.

"Unlike you, InuYasha, I'm not a freak. I don't harbor incestuous feelings towards you. Like I said, I thought you were a female in heat. Nothing more." His eyes traced once more appreciately over InuYasha stomach and chest, before continuing. "Why would you even think I would have an interest in the likes of you, InuYasha? I could have any female I want. I would NEVER choose someone like you." He turned gracefully, stalking back into the bushes, leaving a now naked and crying InuYasha in his wake.

(My story)

WITH SESSHOMARU

Sesshomaru walked away, guilt eating at his heart and face. He stopped walking when he was far enough away, fell to his knees and breathed in heavily. He held back the tears that threatened to fall down. He quickly wiped them away before they did, stood up, put his mask back on, and moved on.

'I'm sorry, InuYasha,' he thought. 'But I must do this. I wish for nothing more than to touch you, hold you, feel you, be within you for all eternity, but I mustn't. Please understand.'

With that last thought, he kept walking, blindly, without realizing where he was going.

WITH INUYASHA

InuYasha was still crying at the lakeside. He tried to wipe them away, but they just kept coming.

He thought to himself, 'Why? Why can't you love me like I love you? Why do you hate me so much?' "Why?" he asked aloud to no one before getting up, getting dressed, and walking away. He didn't go back to his friends, he couldn't at the moment. He went off by himself to clear his head a little.

ONE MONTH LATER

It was one month later when they saw each other again. Sesshomaru was standing in an open field, his back towards InuYasha as he came bouncing through the woods.

"What do you want now, InuYasha?" he asked as he tried to put as much venom into his words as possible.

"I just want to know why you hate me?" he asked as he tried to hold back as much sadness as he could, but to no evade. Sesshomaru flinched as he heard the sadness. He turned and fixed InuYasha with his cold eyes, yet they held confusion. "Why don't you love me? What have I ever done to you to make you hate me so much? How can I make you like me? How can I be useful to you?"

InuYasha sounded so desperate at the moment. Sesshomaru knew this would probably be his only chance to have InuYasha the way he oh so desperately wanted him.

"You wish to show me what worth you have?" InuYasha only nodded. "Very well. I shall show you what worth you have."

Before he could even register what had happened, InuYasha found himself on all fours with his brother behind him, pounding into his tight little ass with slow, yet deep thrusts, both of them naked. He marveled at how tight InuYasha really was, loving how he writhed beneath him. He knew it hurt so much, but he couldn't bring himself to stop, only slow down. InuYasha didn't even mind. He was on cloud nine. He moaned in both pain, but mostly pleaser, meeting his brother thrust for thrust. After sometime, the pain left.

"Please…nahh … Sessy… ahh… Aniki… aghh!" he begged. Oh how that drove Sesshomaru over the edge. He didn't even get to finish his sentence when his brother started to screw him harder than ever. His moaning and yelling increased, driving Sesshomaru to the brink of insanity. He lifted InuYasha and wrapped his one arm around his waste, still pounding into him. After a while, they both knew they were close to their release. Sesshomaru started to stroke InuYasha's long, think cock in tune with his deep thrust, thus driving InuYasha into his climax and triggering his own as the younger demon squeezed him tightly. They collapsed onto the ground. Sesshomaru pulled out of InuYasha and bit him on the neck, making him moan and himself smirk. He licked the blood away and grabbed the closest piece of clothing, which happened to be InuYasha's robe and covered themselves before going to sleep for the rest of the day and night until morning came.

MORNING

It was only when the first rays of sunlight peeked over the horizon did InuYasha feel the warmth leave his body. He slowly sat up and saw Sesshomaru fully dressed and walking away from him.

"Sesshomaru?" he whispered. Said demon stopped in his tracks and slightly turned his head to look at InuYasha out of the corner of his eye. "Where are you going?"

Sesshomaru only gave him his best cold glare he could muster which wasn't very well considering how cute InuYasha looked with his chest exposed and confusion in his eyes. He gulped before speaking. "I'm leaving. You have shown what worth you have and I am done with you now." The look on InuYasha's face told that he had just broken his brother's heart and the action broke his as well, but he managed to keep his cold and unreadable mask on considering the circumstances.

"But… but…" InuYasha couldn't seem to get anything else out before his throat closed up as he attempted to keep from crying. He looked down briefly before he looked back up only to see Sesshomaru leaving, but not before muttering one last thing to InuYasha.

"As I have said before InuYasha, I am not a freak. I could have anyone I want so why would I choose a filthy half-breed mongrel like yourself?" He looked as if he was expecting an answer from him, but they both knew he didn't want nor need one. "You have proven your worth. Now I shall take my leave."

With that, he left a devastated and crying InuYasha in his wake. 'Dear brother, if only you knew how much this affected me as well. Please, you must understand. In order for you to be safe, you must stay away from me, far away. You must hate me no matter how much it will break my heart. I'd rather have a broken heart than find you dead. Thank you for that one, pleasurable night. I will never forget it, otouto.' And, he was gone.

BACK AT CAMP

InuYasha had returned to camp in a daze, not hearing anyone, especially Kagome's constant bickering. He just walked over passed her towards a tree. He didn't know what happened 'til he heard the one word he so desperately hated.

"SIT!" she yell, making him plummet to the earth. Everyone watched as InuYasha fell to the ground. Sango was about to, literally, knock some common sense into Kagome for doing that to him, but Miroku stopped her by placing his hand on her shoulder. She angrily sat down and both of them just glared at the idiotically enraged reincarnated priestess. When the spell wore off, InuYasha lazily pulled himself off the ground, kept walking towards a tree, and sat down.

"What was that for?" he asked in a rather calm and non-angry voice. In fact, the only thing heard in his voice was curiosity. Everyone was shocked to put it mildly. They had thought that he would explode like he always did, but he didn't. He was just sitting there, so calm and collected.

"You weren't listening to me! I asked you where you were all day yesterday and last night!" she practically screeched at him. His ears flattened against his head, an attempt to drown out some of her horrid voice.

"I don't want to talk about it right now." His voice was again calm. Everyone was beyond shocked that he hadn't lost his temper as of yet.

Miroku looked at his best friend with sadness in his eyes and grief in his heart. 'InuYasha, my friend, I'm so sorry for what I made you do.' His thoughts were interrupted once more when Kagome gave another agonizing screeched 'sit', again making InuYasha, plummet to the earth.

"You're such a jerk! I worry about you all night and this is the thanks I get! Well fine! Next time, I won't even bother! Happy!"

'No,' he thought to himself, still on the ground. 'I'm not happy, not happy at all.' After she was done screeching, he heard her stomp over and sit with Sango, Shippo and Kilala around the fire. InuYasha finally got off the ground, but kept his head cast down. He saw a pair of socked feet in sandals and automatically knew it was Miroku.

"Do you want to talk?" he asked in a hushed voice so that only they could hear. InuYasha only nodded, got up, and followed Miroku into the woods.

"Where are you two going Miroku?" asked Sango in her soft voice. It was a question she felt she should as though she knew everything about the whole InuYasha and Sesshomaru situation. She was the second person to find out. Miroku was, of course, the first and he told her, but told her to tell no one. She, of course, didn't. She only asked the question to satisfy Kagome's curiosity.

"InuYasha and I are going for a little walk to clear our heads." He informed the others.

"Oh, so he'll talk to you, but he won't talk to me!" Kagome again asked in that dreaded voice.

"Do not be misinformed Kagome. I said, and I quote, 'to clear our heads'. As in, get some fresh air. It's too stuffy around this campfire. We shall be back in a while." Without another word, they were off into the forest.

IN THE FOREST

When they were deep enough into the forest that Miroku was sure neither Kilala nor Shippo could hear them talking with their demon ears, he stopped, turned, and stood front of his best friend. InuYasha had been quiet the whole walk, not making a single sound. This broke Miroku's heart.

"InuYasha…" was all he could say before the half-demon threw himself into the monk's chest, tears freely falling down his face as he rapped his arms around his midsection and buried his face into Miroku's clothes. Miroku wasn't able to catch them both before they fell to the ground. He sort of expected that, but they still fell.

"Why Miroku?" he asked. Miroku knew what he meant, though he let him continue as he rapped his arms around his best friend, stoked his back to calm him down and let him continue. "Why does it hurt so much? What did I do? I gave him my all, everything I had; my heart, soul, even my body. But he still hates me. Why does he not like me? What can I do to get him to like me? What do I do now?"

He knew his friend was still very young. In fact, in human years, Miroku was about one year older than him, and he himself was still very young. His friend was young and had been through so much in his life. He knew for he had somehow managed to get InuYasha to tell him about his past. He had told him everything; absolutely everything. He knew about how he was exiled from his village once his mother died, how he was beaten, tortured, starved, held captive with no food or water, stoned, everything. He knew more than Kagome thought she knew. She had thought that she was the one closest to InuYasha, that she knew all there was to know of him, but she didn't even know the basics. Miroku was the one who knew of his horrid past. Then came Sango, even Shippo and Kilala knew more than Kagome could hope to. And he knew that his friend was deeply in love with his older brother.

"InuYasha… please forgive me." He whispered. InuYasha looked up at him in confusion as tears still uncaringly fell from his eyes. He let Miroku continue. "Forgive me. If I hadn't told you to be brave, if I hadn't made you go to him… you wouldn't be feeling this pain right now. Please forgive me."

InuYasha only stared at him before dropping his head. He let go of Miroku and sat on his feet, which made the monk think that he was not forgiven, but was happily mistaken. "It's alright Miroku. It wasn't your fault at all."

"But InuYasha, if I hadn't told you to go to him…"

"I wouldn't have known how he truly felt about me. I would've been left in the dark forever. In a way Miroku, I'm grateful to you. Thanks." He said and gave a weak, yet happy smile to Miroku. Miroku was happy that InuYasha smiled and that it was, somewhat, sincere. He smiled as well and helped him back up to his feet.

"Come my friend. We should get back to everyone, lest Kagome 'sit' you to oblivion for being late." He seemed to get angry at the thought. "InuYasha, why won't you let me or Sango tell her or do something to her to make her stop? We know, and when I say we, I mean everyone knows that you don't disserve those dreaded sits. Even Shippo knows. And if Kilala could talk, she'd probably say those same words."

"It's alright Miroku. I can handle it. I don't want you two to worry about it." Miroku only sighed as they walked back towards camp.

BACK AT CAMP

When they got back to camp, they walked over to the fire and sat with everyone else.

"What took you guys so long?" ask Kagome in her o so annoying voice. "I was getting worried."

"We're sorry Lady Kagome. We decided to rest for a while." spoke Miroku. He tried so very, very hard not to let her heard the distain and disgust in his voice as he spoke to her. InuYasha, of course, picked it up and, unable to contain himself, chuckled a little. Kagome turned her eyes to him in anger.

"And just what are you smiling for?" she asked in her pissed off voice. InuYasha only dropped his head and shook it 'no'. Sadly, Kagome wouldn't let it go. "InuYasha, I asked what you were laughing at! And I want an answer! NOW!" she screeched so loud, InuYasha and everyone else had to literally cover their ears to drown out the god forsaken noise.

"Silence wench!" yelled someone from the forest. "If you know what's good for you, you'll shut that trap of yours." The person walked out of the woods and made himself visible to everyone. InuYasha nearly had a heart attack when he saw the man, or rather demon, who had broken his heart only hours ago. Sesshomaru looked at everyone in the group, stopping and starring at InuYasha the longest. InuYasha didn't look at him. His head was cast downward to the side. Miroku looked at InuYasha as well. His heart ached for his friend. He could clearly see that InuYasha was trembling, but not from fear. No, but from sadness as he tried his damn near hardest to keep from crying or letting any tears fall. He knew if he did, Shippo would smell them, then ask why he was crying, and when he didn't answer, Kagome would interrogate him some more and when he still didn't answer, he would get sat about a couple hundred THOUSAND times. He didn't want to deal with her or anyone for that matter at the moment.

"What are you doing here Sesshomaru! You're not welcome here!" she stood and yelled. She really must have a death wish!

"This is my land wench. If you wish to keep your limbs in tack, you had better well keep that trap of yours shut." By the gods how she infuriated him to no end! He wanted nothing, but to rid the world of her pathetic existence once and for all on the spot, but he didn't for he knew that it would hurt his brother even more.

Kagome, being the idiotic, smug, stuck up, rebellious teen she was, was too stupid to back down. Instead, she straightened up and crossed her arms as a smug look crossed her face and an ugly smirk appeared on her face. Oh how he wanted to get rid of her right at that moment, but he reframed himself from doing so.

"You can't hurt me. InuYasha will protect me like always. Right!" she turned her face to InuYasha who just kept looking away from her and everyone else. "Right, InuYasha!" she yelled at him. He visibly shuddered. Sesshomaru almost lost his cool and pulled out her vocal cords for both hurting InuYasha's ears with her annoying voice, but for also scaring him. "InuYasha!" InuYasha still didn't answer her. "InuYasha, answer me NOW!"

Finally, InuYasha reacted. He stood up and bowed to them all, catching everyone by surprise and scaring his group as well. Neither his eyes nor head ever lifted. He just turned around and started to walk away from everyone. They all just stared at him as he left. Kagome, of course, was the first to react. "SIT!" she yelled at the top of her lungs, making him fall to the ground. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, stared at her with so much hate, anger and murder. "ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GONNA JUST LEAVE ME AND LET SESSHOMARU KILL ME! YOU SAID YOU'D ALWAYS PROTECT ME! WHAT ABOUT RIGHT NOW! GET BACK HERE AND PROTECT ME DAMNIT!" The three full demons present (a/n: Sesshomaru, Kilala, even Shippo) wanted nothing more than to claw out her eyes, rip out her vocal cords with her teeth, and burn her alive (a/n: in that order from characters in parenthesis). InuYasha, however, just got up after the spell wore off and kept walking. He needed to get away; away from her, away from Sesshomaru, away from everything. Miroku and Sango understood that. Just as Kagome was about to yell that dreaded word again, Miroku ran up to her and placed his beaded had, rather very roughly, over her big, fat mouth. She mumbled into the hand angrily and flailed around, trying desperately to get out of his arms.

"Silence Kagome!" Miroku yelled almost at the top of his lungs. He had finally lost it once Kagome started yelling and wouldn't shut up and when Sesshomaru appeared. "Quit being such a child and leave him alone! He has a life as well! He at LEAST disserves to have some time alone! In fact, he NEEDS some time alone! He's had a rough day and needs to clear his head and be away from everything and everyone!" He was seething with anger. Sesshomaru knew that he was also talking to him though he was yelling at the girl.

Kagome finally got free and started yelling at him. "What are you talking about! InuYasha doesn't have a life! He spends his whole life with us and searching for the Sacred Jewel Shards! What could he possibly need to get away for!" she asked in an I-Know-Him-More-Than-You way that irritated the hell outta everyone.

Miroku was so upset that he almost slapped Kagome right smack dab in the middle of her face. He dropped his head and trembled in anger. "THAT'S IT! YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A SPOILED, POMPUS BRAT! YOU DON'T EVER THINK OF ANYONE, BUT YOURSELF! INUYAHSA MAY BE SEARCHING FOR THE JEWEL, BUT HE DOES HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE OF ALL OF THIS, JUST AS YOU DO IN YOUR TIME!" He stomped over to her and, as he yelled, she fell right on her ass, fear and astonishment written on her face as he stomped away in the opposite direction of InuYasha. He stopped just before he walked into the forest and called over his shoulder without turning around. "Sesshomaru!" Said person looked at him out of the corner of his eyes. "You can do whatever you want with her! Do us all a favor and pull out that retched tongue of hers if you please!" With that, he walked into the forest until he disappeared from human sight. Sesshomaru could only smirk as he watched him disappear and, as he turned to the frightened Kagome who grow even more frightened under the weight of his stare, his smirk grew even more.

Kagome's fear only grew more and more as Sesshomaru advanced towards her. She did the thing she always did when in danger; "INUYASHA! INUYASHA, HELP ME!" Sadly, he didn't answer like she'd hoped and, somewhat, knew he would. Sadly, and as everyone thought, InuYasha didn't come for her. Sesshomaru kept advancing towards her. When he was right in front of her, he picked her up by her throat, effectively cutting off her air supply and making her squirm, but not enough to choke and kill her.

"Now," he began. "Listen and listen good wench, because I do not repeat myself. You will be quiet and keep that trap of yours closed. You are in MY lands and are disturbing me and everything else around here." He continued to hold her, ignoring her futile attempts to kick him and get free. "While here, I expect you to abide by each and EVERY rule. If I have to hear your dreaded voice once more, make no mistake that I WILL come and I WILL make sure that you never speak, see, hear, or walk ever again. Am I clear!" he growled through clenched teeth to scare her even more and show that he was serious. Kagome could only nod her head as fear was shown clear in her eyes. He dropped her right on her ass and turned to walk away.

"Hay, why'd you drop me like that! That hurt you know!" she screeched once more, realizing her mistake once she found herself hanging by her neck once more by his hand.

"As I said before woman, be SILENT!" his yelled, voice echoing throughout the entire forest, scaring any birds and/or demons in a 100 mile radius. He dropped her roughly once more and walked away. When he was out of hearing distance, Kagome began to yell.

"Who does he think he is! Just because he's so powerful, he thinks he can do whatever he wants! Why if InuYasha were here, he'd…" She didn't get to finish here sentence before Sango stood and yelled at her just like Miroku had.

"ENOUGH KAGOME!" she screeched at the top of her lungs. "ALL YOU DO IS WHINE AND COMPLAIN ALL THE TIME! YOU SIT INUYASHA WHEN HE DOESN'T DO WHAT YOU ASK, YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ANYTHING HE SAYS, AND YOU WON'T LEAVE HIM ALONE!" She continued her ranting long after Kagome fell again. "INUYASHA MAY BE RASH AND A COMPLETE IDIOT MOST OF THE TIME, BUT HE DOESN'T DISSERVE TO BE SAT EVERYTIME HE DOESN'T LISTEN TO YOU, HEAR YOU, DO WHAT YOU SAY, OR ANY OTHER STUPID REASON YOU CAN COME UP WITH! STOP BEING SUCH A CHILD AND ACT LIKE YOU'VE GOT SOME GOD DAMN SENSE PRIESTESS!" When she was done venting, she looked at the complete an utter shock on Kagome's face, the dizzy expressions on Kilala and Shippo's faces, the smile on Miroku's face as he reappeared, and the smirk and look of amusement on Sesshomaru's face as he reappeared as well. When she had calmed down to a reasonable degree, she sat back down and started to play with the fire to calm down the rest of the way.

LATER THAT NIGHT

It was around an hour or two before midnight before InuYasha finally came back to camp, head hung low. He was expecting to get sat, but was surprised when he wasn't. He still didn't raise his head, but he did sit with everyone around the fire as Kagome stirred the soup for their dinner. There was a long silence before someone broke it.

"Where were you all night?" ask Kagome, her voice holding so much venom in it. InuYasha didn't even flinch. He just sat there quietly. "Well!" she raised her voice.

InuYasha sighed and finally answered her. "I went for a walk. After a while, I found a river and sat by it. I looked at my reflection for a while and remembered my past. Soon, I fell asleep. I woke up a little while ago and came back here." There was a pause. "Happy?"

Kagome huffed and continued to stir the soup. "You're lying." she simply said.

"No I'm not."

"InuYasha, I know you better than anyone. You never recall your past." Everyone wanted to bust out laughing when she said she knew him better than anyone

"Kagome, I'm not lying. I'm telling the truth."

"You went to see Kikyo, didn't you?"

"Kagome…"

"No! Tell me the truth InuYasha! I want to know where you were!" She stood and stomped her foot like the child she was.

InuYasha could only sign. "Kagome, you're never gonna be happy unless I give you the answer you want. I told you the truth. I recalled my past before my mom had died and I was happy. I'm not lying to you. And I haven't seen Kikyo for over a year now. I told you that I don't love her anymore. I never really loved her in the first place. I just felt obligated to protect her because it felt like it was my fault she died when in fact it wasn't. If you really don't believe me, have Kilala and Shippo smell me for any graveyard soil. I guarantee that the only soil they're gonna smell on he is from when you sat me all those god damn times."

Kagome flinched at his last sentence. She opened her mouth to sit him again, but he interrupted her.

"Kagome, it's been a long day. Can we please just eat and go to bed?" he asked. Miroku and Sango looked at him with so much sadness and concern in their eyes for him and anger and murder in their eyes for Kagome. They had never seen him look and sound so defeated. Earlier, Miroku pulled Sango away to tell her what had happened. Right now, she wasn't sure if she wanted to murder Kagome or Sesshomaru more, but she was leaning towards Kagome. Not just because she was closer and she was 180% sure she would survive afterwards, but also because the little bitch kept runnin' her god forsaken mouth and kept hurting the person she thought as a little brother for in human years, he was probably about a few moths to a year younger than her. She just wanted to drive her threw with her Hiraikos over and over again until there was nothing left but little bits and pieces not even big enough for crumbs.

"InuYasha!" They all recognized that tone. It was the same tone she always used when she was about to 'sit' InuYasha. Before she could, Sango placed her hand roughly over her mouth.

"Say that damned word, and you're the one who's gonna be eating dirt for the rest of the night. God that?" Her voice was stern and low and calm which sent chills of anxiousness that he never felt before. He couldn't suppress the mischief's smile that appeared on his face. After some time, Sango removed her hand, but kept an eye on her as she continued to angrily stir the stew.

When it was done, she handed everyone a bowl, being extra sure to spill some on InuYasha's lap. Everyone, including Shippo and Kilala, glared at her. InuYasha didn't do anything. He just took the food and ate it slowly and neatly. When he finished eating, he complimented her food, which he receive with a snotty snort and she stuck up her nose. He had gotten three more bowls, courtesy of Sango for he wanted nothing to do with Kagome and vise-versa. Everyone was curious as to why he was so hungry, yet didn't eat like an animal, but actually like a proper… prince! After he finished his bowl, he had gotten six more, completing a total of ten bowls in one night. They were all confused as to why he was so hungry and eating so neatly. Miroku and Sango knew of demon culture so they had a suspicion of what was wrong with him. When he was finished eating, he got up, bowed, and began to walk towards the same direction that he had left earlier.

Kagome yelled, "And where exactly do you think you're going!"

"I'm just going to the river to clean off my pants." He said calmly as everyone glared at Kagome. "It shouldn't take me long; probably only about five minutes. I'll be back soon."

"You better be."

They all heard a growl, but were surprised that it wasn't coming from InuYasha. He was even surprised to hear it too. They all turned and saw that it was Shippo and Kilala growling at her. She looked innocently stunned at Shippo, wondering what was wrong with him.

"Shippo," she whispered. "What's wrong?"

He snapped out of his little anger trance and finished eating. Sango and Miroku had to suppress the laughs that were trying to escape their throats. Everyone else went back to eating as well while InuYasha went to the river to get cleaned up. When InuYasha was gone and Miroku and Sango finished eating, they both got up to leave as well, but in the opposite direction of InuYasha.

"Hay, where are you guys going?" asked Kagome in her surprised voice.

Sango turned around and fixed her with her cold, narrowed eyes. "I have to talk to Miroku about something very important. I could be a life or death situation, but no one else can hear of this."

With that, she turned and they both continued to leave.

AT THE RIVER

InuYasha was standing in the river, washing his clothes. He made sure that it was nice and clean and didn't smell like soup. When he was done, he placed them on the bank to dry while he washed himself.

IN THE FOREST

"What are we gonna do Miroku?" asked Sango.

"I don't know." was his sad reply.

"How are we gonna tell him?"

"He could be, but we don't know for sure."

"We could run some tests."

"That's a good idea. When he comes back, we'll do just that. Kagome doesn't know about him or demons so we can run them in front of her."

"God I hate her so much Miroku. She became such a bitch over time."

"Yes, I know, but what can we do? She's the only one who can sense the jewel shards. We need her just so she can sense Naraku's shards so we can defeat him and then we don't need her anymore. 'Til then, we must keep her from sitting InuYasha. We must protect him."

"Those sits could kill him if she wants them to. So let's do our best."

"Right, for InuYasha and his future. Also, when we get back, we must congratulate little Shippo and Kilala for a job well done."

Sango and Miroku both giggled. "You're right." She agreed. "Next time we tell him what's going on. He won't tell his 'adopted mother' anything we tell him not to. It sad though. Kagome still thinks Shippo thinks of her as his adopted mother when in fact, he doesn't. H doesn't even think of her as an older sister."

"I believe you take up that category."

"Thanks. Come on. We better head back. I swear, if her 'royal hyenas' says one thing to any of the three of us, she's gonna have to taste my fist." Sango uppercut her right hand to lat him know she meant business.

BACK AT CAMP

Sango and Miroku emerged from the woods a few seconds before InuYasha. They all took their seats and got ready for bed. Kagome sent InuYasha a childish glare at him. He wasn't even looking at her so he didn't see it. Miroku and Sango on the other hand, saw it loud and clear. Miroku had to, literally, hold her down from going over and beating the shit outta Kagome. They just got up quietly and walked over towards him. InuYasha's thoughts were back to his older brother. He wanted to cry again and again, over and over again to get rid of the pain, but he wouldn't.

'I won't.' he told himself. 'I won't cry anymore. If Sesshomaru doesn't want me, then that's that. I'll leave him alone and won't ever bother him again. But I'll still love him. No matter what, I'll always love him even if he doesn't love me too.' A single tear fell from his left eye, but he didn't instantly wipe it away. 'Always.' he repeated. A shadow cast over him. He looked up to meet his older brother's and sister's concerned eyes (Miroku and Sango). He quickly wiped the tear away and started to get up, thinking that they wanted to talk to him, but they stopped him.

"No my friend." spoke Miroku in a whispered voice so that they were the only ones who could hear. "Sit down. We just want to examine you." He mentally cursed himself when he saw InuYasha flinch when he said the word 'sit'.

Kagome looked at them with the most confused expression she could muster up. She saw Sango opening and checking InuYasha's eyes while Miroku closed his eyes while checking his pulse. Sango then rubbed his cheek, which he happily closed his eyes and leaned into. Sango smiled when he did. Kagome wanted to barf, go over there, and demand they tell her what the heck they're doing to him, but she, somehow, managed to control herself and just watched. Miroku then opened his eyes and looked around. He and Sango looked at each other and nodded.

"What's wrong?" InuYasha asked. They both looked at him with smiles, real, genuine smiles. Sango walked over to where Shippo was. He had started sleeping with her after sometime which confused Kagome so much. She bent down and whispered something into his ear which made his happy. He squealed out loud and Sango had to put a finger to mouth to indicate to keep quiet. Shippo covered his mouth his tiny hands, but you could clearly see the smile on his lips peeking through his little fingers. He ran over to InuYasha, pulled him to his feet, and pulled him into the forest.

"Hay, what the heck is going on!" complained Kagome.

Sango was the first one to answer. "Ten minutes. I win the bet Miroku."

Miroku quickly caught onto the little lie and played along. "Darn it! Only a few minutes longer and I would've won!"

"Too bad monk. Now play up." Miroku pulled a few silver coins out of a pouch in his robes and handed them to her. "Thank Kagome. You helped me win the bet. We wanted to see how long you would be able to stay quiet. I said anywhere between five and ten minutes while Miroku said anywhere between twelve and fifteen minutes. Thanks!" She happily placed the coins in her clothes and laid down for bed. Kagome huffed, apparently offended, and plopped into her sleeping bag before quickly falling asleep. When InuYasha came back, he had a huge smile on his face. He looked ready to cry with joy as tears rimmed his eyes. They smiled at him as well before they all went to bed.

THREE MONTHS LATER

It had been around three months since InuYasha had found out that he was pregnant. His stomach began to show a little, mostly because a demon's pregnancy only lasts around six to seven months. Luckily, his robes concealed his stomach from Kagome and Sango, Miroku, Shippo, and Kilala had somehow… 'persuaded' her not to 'sit' him, if you get what I mean. It was a bright and clear day, for they had finally defeated Naraku. They looked around at the remains of his body. Miroku's wind tunnel had closed and he was crying in Sango's arms with joy as she did the same to him.

"I can't believe he's actually gone." Said Miroku with happiness. Tears fell freely and happily from his eyes as they did hers as well.

"Me neither." She agreed. The next moment, you could see Miroku lowering his head and kissing Sango with so much passion and happiness any person could give anyone. When they pulled away, they hugged each other in a great big happy hug, tears still falling from their eyes. InuYasha couldn't stop the smile that crept onto his face. He was happy for them both. He looked at Sesshomaru who just happened to be looking at him as well, his face unreadable and cold as always. They both just looked at each other across the clearing with blank expressions, the wind blowing their hair away from their faces. No matter how hard they tried, neither of them could look away from the other.

'My god,' thought Sesshomaru. 'He's glowing. He looks so beautiful, like an angel. I guess he is an angel, my angel. Oh, how I wish to be with him.'

'Sesshomaru,' thought InuYasha. 'What would you do if I told you I was pregnant with your heir? Would you believe me? Would you take me back? Would you accept me? Or… would you reject me and call me a liar? A worthless half-breed not worthy of being near him? Would you cast me away like always? I don't know what to do.'

The two continued to stare, neither noticing Miroku nor Sango watching them. After a few more moments of utter silence, Sesshomaru began to stalk towards InuYasha. InuYasha was frozen on the spot. His heart rate increased, his eyes widened, and his throat dried. With every step Sesshomaru took, InuYasha drew a breath. Sadly, when Sesshomaru was close enough, he kept walking right past InuYasha without a second glance. InuYasha's mouth was open as if he was about to say something, but nothing would come out. He quickly turned around and outstretched his arms to Sesshomaru's disappearing body, still trying to say something, but still nothing came out. He retracted his arms to his chest, clutched it, and lowered his head in defeat.

Sango and Miroku couldn't take it. They both let go and walked up to him. He didn't even hear them, but he felt them when they placed their hands on his shoulders. He looked at them in mild confusion.

Miroku spoke up first. "Go after him my friend. We know you want to."

Sango continued. "Go and tell him. He disserves to know."

With a happy nod and a smile, he was off, following his brother's sent.

Kagome, who had been in her own little happy world, hadn't noticed a thing outside her mind. When InuYasha left was when she finally snapped back to reality. "Hay!" her oh to loud voice screeched towards the two lovers, making them shiver with hatred. "Where'd InuYasha go!" she asked rather loudly. The two of them just remain quiet as they all looked for a place to camp for the night.

IN THE FOREST

Sesshomaru was in another open field, his mind in a haze until he heard and smelt his little brother approaching.

'Oh, why does his sent corrupt my mind so much more now than it did only months ago?' he asked himself in him mind as his brother came bouncing through the forest once again like he had done three months ago. This time, however, he had the biggest smile on his face as he walked towards Sesshomaru. He was right in front of Sesshomaru when he stopped. "What is it you want now InuYasha?" He shocked himself when his voice didn't sound at all cold or heartless. In fact, it sounded soft and happy in more ways than one.

InuYasha slowly grabbed his hand and held it in a firm, yet loose, loving grip. "I love you." was his only reply to the question. Sesshomaru's eyes grew wide. "I love you, Sesshomaru. I really do. I have for a long time. I was hoping that maybe someday, if I could prove myself, you might come to at least like me a little." There was a long pause as Sesshomaru snatched his hand away from InuYasha and turned away from him. InuYasha looked a little sad and shocked. "Sesshomaru." He started. The great demon lord still didn't say anything. He tried again. "Sesshomaru please, say something, anything." He begged. He was willing to hear an insult just to break the silence. The only thing Sesshomaru could do at the moment was leave, and leave he did. He slowly walked away from InuYasha. InuYasha once again outstretched his hand only to recline it a moment later. This time, however, he started to cry. He ran away, away from the field, away from the pain he felt at the moment at that place, and to the nearby river.

WITH SESSHOMARU

Sesshomaru had made it back to Rin, Jaken, and their little camp in record time. His mind was in such a haze that he did hear the sea of compliments that he received from Jaken. He just sat done at the back of a tree and stared at the sky. Jaken, sensing something wrong with his lord, decided to leave him alone and went back to yelling at Rin. After some time, he looked at Rin.

"Rin," he called to her. "Come here for a moment." And the little girl did as she was told. She ran up to him with her usual smile, but was surprised when Sesshomaru lifted her up, placed her on his lap, wrapped his arm around her lovingly and fatherly, and leaned his chin on her head as he stared at the sky. Rin and Jaken were both surprised, Jaken especially, but Rin was happy and soon leaned into his chest as a daughter would do and looked at the sky as well.

"Rin," he repeated. "Why is it that you stay with me?" He couldn't stop the mild curiosity and concern that was held in his voice. Unfortunately for him, Rin heard it and understood it.

"Because my Lord," she said. "I care about you." To say that the sentence had shocked his would've been an understatement. It had him completely unprepared for. His face was still a sea of emotions that was quickly transcending into an ocean. Rin chose to continue as she turned to look at the sky once again. "I care about you and what happens to you. The day I saw you hurt in the forest, I knew you were a demon and could've still possibly killed me if you had so chose, but I still took my chances because I wanted to help you. Not in hopes of being repaid for a good deed or because it was the right thing to do, but because I knew you needed help and I wanted to help you. I knew you would leave once you had regained your strength and probably kill me like other demons had tried to do, but that still didn't stop me from helping you. I didn't think that you'd actually let me stay with you for so long. And I'm thankful for that." She took a pause to look at his face with a smile on her face that made Sesshomaru even more confused.

"InuYasha wants the same thing. He wants you to accept him as your brother and as a part of your family. That's why he always fights you. He wants to show you that he is strong enough to be considered a part of your blood without being considered a taint to it." Sesshomaru winced at the words that he knew he had spoken oh to many times before in the past, but luckily Rin didn't notice and continued. "He wants you to love him, just as he loves you."

Sesshomaru nearly gasped at her. "How do you know he loves me?" he asked as his curiosity grew.

"Because his monk friend told me so. They are very close. When ever you two fought, I'd go over to his companions and talk to them. The monk told me that InuYasha really only fight you to prove himself worthy of you. Just because he's a half-demon doesn't mean you should treat him any differently as if he were a full demon. Try putting your self in our position. As a human, I have to worry about demons coming and trying to eat me, but him. He had to worry about demons AND humans. With no one as a friend and being alone when he was only a few years older than me, it had to be touch on him if it was tough on me. And I had people to talk to and watch over me while he didn't." She stopped and looked at him again. "He really loves you Lord Sesshomaru and I know you love him too."

"How so?"

"I guess it got easier for me to see past your cold mask over the years."

He knew she was right. She was the only one who really understood him and could worry him to death. Her and InuYasha both. He smiled at her and thanked her.

"Rin, do you consider me as your father?" he had to know.

Rin smiled at him and answered without hesitation. "Yes I do."

He smiled at her again and gave her a hug. "Then you may call me so if you'd like."

To say Rin was shocked would've been putting it mildly. She was shocked, but soon smiled and hugged him back before drifting into a nap like Jaken had at the base of a tree.

"Thank you, father." She said as she fell asleep in his arms.

Sesshomaru looked at the sky. 'Tomorrow,' he thought to himself. 'Tomorrow I will go to him and tell him the truth.'

AT THE RIVER

When he InuYasha had reached the river, he dropped to his knees and started to cry. He screamed and yelled and shouted and cried. He held himself and his stomach as he continued to cry to himself.

"Why?" he asked no one in particular. "Why? Why won't he love me? Why won't he even like me? Do I really mean that little to him? Does my life mean nothing to him?" He looked down at his rounded belly and stroked it. "If he doesn't want me, then I'll leave." He got up, brushed himself off, wiped away his tears, and petted his stomach once more with a sight smile. "I'll leave him for now, and for good. He'll never have to worry about an annoying half-breed bothering him ever again. But I will still love him. I'll just give our child my love. I'll raise it like a good father, however that is. I'll give it all my love and I won't be sad. I won't dwell on the past and have my child hating me like its father does. I'll be the best father that I can be and more."

With that, he turned and walked back towards everyone.

BACK AT CAMP

InuYasha walked back to camp in silence and was immediately stopped by an enraged Kagome. When he came into camp, she ran right up to him and started yelling at him and demanding him with answers to her never ending sea of questions. InuYasha just stood there with his head down, bangs covering his eyes. Everyone looked at him, all wondering the same question: Did everything go okay? But they all knew that everything wasn't.

"INUYASHA!" yelled the enraged future girl. "ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME! When she didn't get an answer, she did the one thing she always does, or at least tried to. "INUYAHSA, SI…!" The nest few movements seemed to go in slow motion for everyone as Kagome stopped talking. Kagome didn't know what got her or why she was on the ground. It took forever for their minds to process what had happened. When it did, three words repeated over and over. They were the simplest words yet they seemed so unreal:

InuYasha slapped Kagome!

They all, including Kagome, looked at him in shock and everyone except her eyes also shows with admiration. They all had smiled on their faces as they looked at him. Even Kilala sported a little smile.

"I-InuYasha? Did you just…?" she asked in her soft voice. She never got an answer out of him. He just walked over to a tree which just happened to be closest to Miroku and Sango, laid down, and went to sleep. The couple knew that he was tired and would let him have his rest.

LATER THAT NIGHT

It was the middle of the night and everyone lay asleep in their nice cozy sleeping bags or on the transformed Kilala. The only one up at this time a night was our beloved half-demon. He was up and writing a letter, completing a total of three letters. He sealed the final letter and walked over to Miroku. He shook him awake.

"Miroku, hay Miroku, wake up. I need you to follow me." He whispered as softly as he could. Miroku reluctantly woke up and followed InuYasha into the forest.

IN THE FOREST

"Are you sure you want to go my friend?" asked the very sad monk to his half-demon friend.

"Don't worry Miroku. I'll be fine. I've lived on my own for years."

"Yes, but you were never pregnant before."

"Don't worry. I've heard of a village that's full of humans, demons, and half-demons. Hopefully, they'll accept me."

"Alright, I'll let you go, but don't expect me to forget about you or never visit you or look for you."

InuYasha couldn't help but smile and chuckle to him. "Thank you Miroku. You're the best friend and brother anyone could as for." He gave Miroku a big hug before he pulled away and took two letters out of his robe. "Here, these are for you guys. This letter is for you and Sango and this one is for Kagome. I don't care if you tell Shippo. I know he won't tell her anything. Please tell Shippo that I love him and have always considered him as a son."

Miroku only nodded and watched as the last of his friends disappeared into the night. That was the last time.

MORNING

The next morning was peaceful for Sesshomaru. They had begun to walk towards InuYasha group. He was ready to tell InuYasha the real truth, but sadly, he was stopped when he found a note of the ground in his path with his name on it. He opened it and found it had two pieces of paper within it. He read the first one silently to himself. As he read, the contents of the note broke his heart.

"Dear Sesshomaru,

I hope you don't throw this away before reading it. I just wanted to tell you goodbye. I know I've been a nuisance to you since the day you found out that i was concieved and I'm sorry for that. I realize that it was horrible of me to blame you for ever hurting me when I realize that it was my fault you were hurting you. I'm sorry that I took father away from you and that he loved my mother instead of yours. I don't really know anything about him, but I know that if he chose my mom over yours it must mean that he really loved her just as I love you. I know that he also loved you if he had the patience to deal with you.
Anyway, I've found a way for you to never have to deal with me evr again. I'm leaving! I've left my group and am going to live on my own like I did after mother died. I'll be okay though, not that you'd care. At least I'll be out of your hair for good.
Please take care of yourself and Rin and that ugly green toad thing as well. I hope that your life is everything you hope and I hope you find a wonderful mate that will produce you and heir and make you happy. Just remember that I love you. Always have and always will. I'll never forget you and I hope you don't forget me either. Take care, my love.

-InuYasha

P.S. On the other sheet of paper are the ingredients for the potion to get your arm back. To need to get the ingredients, mix them together, drink it, and read the note aloud once you swallow the last drop. I've already tried it on myself so i know it'll work for you. Again, I'm sorry about everything that i've put you through."

And that was the end of the letter. He just stood there, visibly shaking to the bone is fear. He clutched the paper as he fought to hold back his tears.

'No.' he thought. 'He... he can't be gone. No! I was supposed to tell him today! I was gonna tell him that I loved him! No, no, NO!' He dropped his head.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" asked a very confused and distresses Jaken. 'I wonder why he stopped. He's shaking from what ever that letter says. I wonder what wrong.' He was brought out of his thoughts when his name was called.

"Jaken," called Sesshomaru. "Watch after Rin for me. I need to be alone for a while."

Jaken stared at his master for a moment before nodded his head 'yes' and watched as Sesshomaru left. He turned towards Rin who was just resting against Ah-Un's back, looking up at the sky.

"Rin," he began and waited 'til she looked at him. "He finally knows, doesn't he?" Rin only nodded with a small smile.

AT THE RIVER

Sesshomaru had just made it to the river. When he did, he dropped to his knees and busted out crying. He cried and cried and cried like a baby. He held himself tight and cried his eyes, heart, and should out. After about 30 to 45 minutes, he stopped, cleaned his face with the river water, and leaned on a tree trunk as he tried to control his sobs and whimpers.

'InuYasha, please, if you can hear me, hear me at all, please, please be alright. I won't stop looking for you, but until I find you, please be alright, my love.'

With that, he fell into a deep, deep sleep.

To be continued...