BPOV

Chapter One

I laid in bed and stared at my ceiling. My alarm clock would be going off any minuet now.

It's been years. Six to be exact. And not a single day has gone by that I haven't thought of him. A single night that I haven't had nightmares of chasing him in that moss covered forest. That I haven't wished he was here, or that I could just once more look into his perfect topaz eyes. Him. Edward. My Edward. My angel. Well, he was mine. Just not anymore.

I wrapped my arm around my chest to hold myself together. It just hurt to much to think about him, even though I found myself doing just that all the time. I must be a masochist.

Maybe I'm just pathetic. I mean six years. Six! I should be over him by now, shouldn't I? But I'm not.

I tried to fall for Jake a few years after he left. I really, truly did. But it just felt wrong. Like betrayal, even though the only one I was betraying was me. It was my own heart that disagreed... Anyway, Jake, my best friend, 'wolf-boy-wonder,' as I call him sometimes, imprinted on Sarah three years ago. Their both so happy now.

It's been a while since I've felt happiness like that. A long while.

The beeping sound of my alarm clock tore me from my thoughts, and I sighed as I rolled over to shut it off.

I lived in Ithaca, New York now. I moved hear from Washington two years ago.

Forks, Seattle, all the moss covered tress, everything just held to many memories of Edward for me to stay there any longer. Besides, he was never coming back for me. I accepted that a long time ago, so why should it matter anyway where I was? Besides, if he wanted to find me it would be all to easy.

I made my way to the bathroom in my apartment to take a shower. To, 'Have a human moment,' as Edward would say.

After I graduated from Forks High, I went to a University in Seattle to study literature. And now I was the 10th and 11th grade literature teacher at East Ithaca High.

Today was the first day of school, and would be my second year teaching here. To my immense surprise after I took the job, I loved it!

I let the heat of the water relax my muscles as I prepared for the first day of school. I still used my favorite strawberry shampoo, not because he loved it. Though he did. But because it was something I had always done, it was proof that some things can stay the same. It was something I did before I met Edward, and something I still did even though he was gone.

Getting out of my shower and dying myself off, I could smell the coffee brewing in my automatic coffee maker in the kitchen.

Getting dressed in a khaki skirt and light blue blouse, I looked myself over in the mirror and sighed when I realized I looked exactly the way I did the day I went to his house when I met his family.

I looked at my clock and knew I didn't have time to change clothes, so I bolted into the kitchen to pour my coffee in a cup with a lid, sort of like a thermos, and spilt some of it on my hand in the attempt.

"Crap." I muttered to my self at the burn, and began to run my hand under cold water from the faucet.

When I finally managed to cool my hand off (even though it still sort of hurt), pour my coffee, find my keys and shoes and get out the door, I knew I was going to be late.

I turned the keys in the ignition to start my truck. The same truck Charlie bought me all those years ago.

With the time I was making it looked like I would arrive at the school at about the same time the warning bell would ring.

I sighed. This was not going to be my day. Trying to distract myself from thoughts of being late and of him, I flipped my radio on. The same stereo that Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie had bought for me on that horrid birthday. The birthday that changed my life.

I remember stormy weather,

The way the sky looks when it's cold,

and you were with me content with walking,

so unaware of the world.

(Song: "Tuesday Morning" by Michelle Branch)

I flipped the station quickly, the song reminding me too much of him.

I still think of you,

when the nights are cold,

when I'm all alone,

I still feel you here.

I'm still learning how to live with the distance,

and my hearts resistance,

forever reminds me...

I can't let go of you,

letting go of me,

I can't let go of you,

letting me, letting me go,

I can't get over you,

every part of me,

can't let go of you,

letting me go...

(Song: "Letting go of me" by Jessie Daniels)

I turned off the radio in my truck and tried not to let the tears building up in my eyes to escape and the hole in my chest to rip wide open.

I could see the school now. Taking deep calming breaths, I distracted my mind by thinking of today's lesson plan, and of my friend Maris who taught creative writing. I hadn't seen her in a few weeks, maybe she would go out to dinner with me tonight.

I parked my truck in the staff's section, grabbed my coffee out of the cup-holder and my school bag off the passenger seat, and made a mad dash for the front doors.

I heard the warning bell go off. Phew, I was just on time.

I let out a sigh of relief, and made my way to my 11th grade class.

I opened the classroom door to find that most the students were already here and talking in low voices, their were only a few empty desks.

Making my way to the front of the class, I put my bag on my desk and set my coffee down. The second bell hadn't rang yet so all of the kids were still catching up with each other after a whole summer apart. I didn't interrupt, instead I just sat down and breathed another sigh of relief that I had finally made it and wasn't late.

"How was your summer, Miss Swan?" A seventeen year old named Brian Mason asked, I had had him in my 10th grade class last year. He was one of my best students.

"It was kind of boring actually, Mr Mason." I answered him, "I'm glad to be back here." He smiled at me. I wasn't sure of course, but I was kind of under the impression that he had a crush on me.

A girl walked in then, and I recognized her as Jessica Frasier, she had been in my class last year as well. She was a sweet bubbly girl. She had shoulder length dark brown hair, and was always very excited and energetic. She reminded me of Alice, always.

"Oh, Miss Swan!" She exclaimed upon entering the class, "I hadn't realized you were teaching the 11th grade class as well! How was your summer?"

I smiled at her, I just couldn't help but like Jessica Frasier. "It was a bit slow, Jessica. I'm glad to be back here with you guys."

She smiled and took her seat.

The bell rang then, and most of the students stopped talking and turned to face me. A few though ignored the bell and continued on with their conversations.

"Alright." I called as I stood up from my chair and turned the face the chalkboard where I wrote my name.

I turned back to face my students. "I realize you have all been away from each other all summer, but you have the whole school year to catch up. Now is really not the time." I try to be nice to the students, they respect and like you more if you do. You just have to be patient after all.

"We have a few new students in this class I see," I said looking down at a paper that Judy, the school secretary had sent me last week. "Would Sara White, Katie Hester and Jonathan Thomas raise their hands please?"

I saw pale skinned blond girl raise her hand, she looked shy. "Are you Miss White?" I asked her.

"Yes, Ma'am." She said.

A tan girl with blue eyes and brown hair said her name was Katie Hester, and a tall gangly looking guy introduced himself as Jonathan Thomas.

"Welcome to the class." I said kindly to them.

"Now," I said to the class, "This semester we'll be covering some of my favorite classics such as Pride and Prejudice, Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre to name a few.

"Can anybody tell me who wrote Pride and Prejudice?" I asked the class. Nearly every hand shot up.

"That's what I thought." I said with a laugh. "How many of you have read the book?" I asked them. Most of the guys and a little more that half the girls who had their hands in the air put them down on their desk.

I smiled at them. "How many of you read the book before you saw the movie?" I asked them.

Only three of my students hands were still in the air. One boy and two girls.

I recognized one of them as the new girl, Sara White.

"Miss White," I said kindly. "What do you like best about 'Pride and Prejudice?'"

"Well...I suppose I really like how both Mr Darcy and Elizabeth have to over come their pride to admit that they love each other."

Their was a knock on the door just then and Jeff Hart entered, he was on the school staff.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Miss Swan." He said kindly, "but we have another new student. He and his family just moved into town two days ago, and enrolled their kids here today." He pushed the door open a little wider and in walked the most gorgeous boy I had ever seen.

His bronze hair was ruffled and his topaz eyes shined. He was pale white and graceful. It was the face of an angel. A face I never thought I would see again.

I heard the collective intake of breath as the female students in my class saw him and realized they had never before seen anyone and never would see anyone more beautiful then him.

When he entered his eyes snapped up to mine, and widened in shock.

I dropped my coffee cup and heard it clatter on the floor. Thank goodness it didn't break.

It was as if time stopped. I was getting dizzy and realized after a few moments it was because I wasn't breathing.

I took a deep breath, filling my lungs with much needed oxygen. He saw that and smiled my favorite crooked smile.

My heart began to beat triple time, and his grin widened even further. "Stupid vampire hearing," I muttered under my breath so only he could hear.

I heard him chuckle at that.

"Everybody," Jeff Hart said, "This is Edward Cullen."

A girl in the back row fainted. Only his beauty could do that.