Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl, Blair, or Chuck.

Authors Note: This is yet another product of my inability to pay attention in history. I have read several stories that are set up like this and have always enjoyed them. Hopefully you all will enjoy this one.

A is for ass.

Chuck Bass is an ass. He is an obnoxious, self-serving pervert who dresses like some sort of golf convention reject.

There is no way she likes him. Nope, absolutely no way.

B is for breathe.

After their tryst in the limo he finds it increasingly difficult to breathe around her.

He blames it on the stomach problems he has also been experiencing in her presence.

C is for cute.

He refuses to be one half of those sickeningly cute couples that you so often see loitering about in the hallways.

That is why no one can ever know that he likes to call her baby.

D is for duh.

"Duh, of course you do," accompanied by a wide smile is her response to those three little words he has been agonizing over.

E is for Eloise.

She often finds herself thinking about how stunning their children would look like and decides that Eloise is a very cute name.

F is for fucked.

As in Chuck Bass is totally fucked and not in a good way. Her gaze is murderous as it lands on him and the cigarette in his hand. He never should have lied about quitting.

G is for girlfriend.

He had never had one and up until last year had never wanted one, but he loves the way her eyes light up when he says, "This is my girlfriend."

H is for hurt.

She could never admit to anyone how hurt she was when he abandoned her in Tuscany or how often she cried over him that summer.

I is for idiot.

That is how he feels as soon as he wakes up the day after sending her off to Tuscany alone.

Like a total fucking idiot.

J is for jerk.

A slight shove is accompanied by, "God you are such a jerk."

He moves closer and nuzzles her neck, "Yea…but you love me."

Small smile, "Yes well even so you are still a jerk."

K is for Kyle.

Kyle Murphy. The douche bag he punched last week for pinching her ass.

She had walked away from him in a huff, but deep down this show of possessiveness warmed her heart and turned her on quite a bit.

L is for lick.

It's a hot summer in the Hamptons. She is innocently licking a popsicle when he suddenly grabs her arm with a frustrated groan and drags her upstairs to his room.

M is for moan.

She loves to make him moan which is why she abruptly pulls her lips from his and places them instead on his ear, his most sensitive spot.

The second half should be up in a few days. Please read and review.