This was originally going to be posted as a drabble/oneshot when I realized I might turn this into a story. For now it will be labeled as complete but you might want to put an alert on it if you're interested. I might continue it. I do not own Final Fantasy VII

NEW NOTE AS OF 12/11/14: This fic has been censored. An uncensored version can be found on my a03 account under the same username.

Why was he living? It was an ever present question in Vincent's mind and it still had not been answered. It lurked there, in the very back of his mind, nagging him constantly and filling his thoughts with darkness. Jenova was gone, he had helped destroy her. As far as they knew, Sephiroth would never reappear, and after some research, Rufus had discovered a way to destroy the demons within him. All of the problems solved…so where did that leave him?

He banished the thoughts from his mind as he stepped into Seventh Heaven. Tifa stood at the bar, quickly filling up a man's drink and passing it to him. The man took it but his eyes were trained on Vincent, as were everyone else's. Vincent paid their looks no mind, heading towards Tifa and sitting down on one of the stools.

"Vincent…" Tifa breathed, swiftly walking closer to him, leaning over the counter so she could look him straight on.

For once, he did not meet her gaze, staring at his hands as his black hair created a dark curtain around his face. "Where's Cloud?"

"He's at Aerith's church," Tifa answered, worrying her bottom lip. "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"Nothing you need to worry about," Vincent answered, standing again and stepping away from her. "I'll talk to you later."

"Vincent wait!" she cried.

Silence fell over the bar as everyone in the room waited for Vincent's response to Tifa's obviously distressed cry. Vincent didn't move for several heartbeats but then walked out, disappearing just as quickly as he had come.

He stood outside, blending in perfectly with the darkness around him. It swallowed him in, caressing him with its gentle touch and lulling him into a trance, slipping into the cracks of his breaking heart, however cold it might be. Numbing cold slipped up his limbs, threatening to overtake him once again and swallow him whole. He clenched his fists tightly and shook his head before he began walking again, warmth dispelling the cold in seconds.

The spells, he couldn't think of anything else to call them, were getting more frequent. He didn't know what they were but he thought they had something to do with the feeling of need he had felt lately. He was almost certain that if he didn't find whatever it was he was longing for he would die. Guesses at what it was he needed were all he had, but the best he had come up with was simple enough. He needed a reason to live. The reason he was compelled to visit Cloud was simply because he knew that the silent man was probably dealing with a similar problem.

Vincent was unaware of how long he had been walking but eventually his feet hit the cold wood of the broken and abandoned church. The pool of water at the center glistened in the moonlight and Cloud was sitting beside it, his eyes closed and his face upturned to the moon, basking in the light.

When Vincent stood behind him, he turned, gazing up at the man.

"Haven't seen you in awhile," he stated, blue eyes meeting crimson. He did not question Vincent's sudden appearance, figuring it best to wait for the man to speak for himself.

"I have been having trouble," Vincent said quietly, moving to sit down beside Cloud.

Cloud shifted a bit to allow him room. "What kind of trouble?"

"There's a creeping darkness within me," Vincent murmured. "It grows stronger and infiltrates my very being, waiting for me to finally crack so it can take over."

"But Chaos and the others are gone," Cloud said.

"It's a different kind of darkness. Not something substantial, not something I can touch," Vincent continued.

"And it scares you," Cloud finished. "We fear that of what we cannot see….I can't remember who told me that."

"I know why it's there, though," Vincent said.

Cloud turned back to the moon, preferring not to stare Vincent directly in the eyes. "Why?"

"My purpose to live is gone," Vincent answered, his voice neutral and calm despite his words. "I think I am fated to wither away and die."

"Don't be stupid," Cloud sighed. "I'm sure there's something."

"But there isn't. I've come to terms with Lucrecia being gone and the betrayal, Jenova is gone, Chaos and all the other beasts are gone, everything that caused me problems is gone. I have nothing."

"So you're saying the pain and suffering was the only reason you had to live?" Cloud mused.

"The pain itself was not the reason to live. Stopping the pain was. But there is nothing left to stop, there is nothing left for me to do," Vincent whispered. "There is no purpose."

"I know the feeling," Cloud murmured. "The cold. It creeps up on you, doesn't it? It tries to strangle all the feeling out of you and every time you fight it, not willing to go on, yet not willing to give in. It's a confusing feeling and leaves you conflicted, unsure of how to proceed. But I can't help you."

"You have a reason though. I don't know what it is, but you found something," Vincent said. "What?"

"That is not something I can tell you, not yet at least. Our reasons may very well be the same but if I tell you, it wouldn't truly be your reason. It would be one that you took up to try and tame the beast," Cloud said. "But the beast would see that it was a lie and defeat you in the end. If I thrust my reason upon you, it will only cripple your ability to find your own."

Vincent didn't reply at first, instead staring up at the moon, searching for the answer somewhere in its pale light. He was startled, though he didn't flinch, when Cloud suddenly moved to lay his hand over the golden claw of Vincent's.

"Do you understand?" he asked quietly.

"Yes…but why?" Vincent questioned, the truth dawning upon him by the single and simple motion.

"We are alike. I have needed the comfort of knowing there was someone else out there like me. You are here now so I have my reason. I need to make sure you are content, just as I am," Cloud whispered.

"Is it the need for human touch or love?"

"I wouldn't know. Not now. It is still unclear to me," Cloud answered.

"I would like to know for certain, what it is. I feel it as well. It is what compelled me to come here in the first place. I thought that you would be dealing with the same problem as I," Vincent said.

Cloud's hand slid up Vincent's arm and grasped his shoulder lightly before continuing up his neck and finally grasping his chin. He tugged Vincent's head to turn so they could look each other in the eyes.

Crimson clashed with sky and lips touched. Calm washed over both of them and spread through their limbs, fighting the dark tendrils back and cleansing their hearts of doubt, remorse, and sorrow, demanding that they never part. A wind blew, stirring the water, but the two didn't part though they did not move either. They were frozen, almost as though time had stopped and left everything completely and utterly still. The water calmed and their lips parted.

Crimson clashed with Sky and the moon continued to shine.