A.N. Okay, this is a side story to Kyuubi the Bitch. This is one of two side stories that technically could be separate one-shots but not really. I was going to wait till I was finished with Kyuubi The Bitch before posting it, but since Sasuke and Naruto want to take so much time getting to know each other I decided you readers deserved SOMETHING for your patience, and here it is. Anyway, there is a bit of Shouta in this, meaning grown up Sasuke with younger Naruto. You have been warned…
Disclaimer: Yes, I own it, and that's why Sasuke confessed his love for Naruto and screwed him into the ground after killing Itachi… wait, what do you mean that never happened? Okay fine, I don't own it…. Dream wreckers….
Fun with SharinganNaruto was laying in a bed. Which was odd considering the last thing he remembered was Sasuke asking him to help him with a new technique. The bastard had opened his eyes, activated his bloodline limit, and…
Naruto was lying in bed.
It wasn't his, of that he was certain. It was too soft, too warm, and smelled of the wind right before the rain, and held the undertone of musk. Male musk, if Kyuubi's instincts were right, and she was never wrong.
The sheets had the crisp feel of being newly washed, and under the smells that surrounded him was the clean smell of detergent. It should have worried him, but he instinctively knew the smell, and nuzzled closer to it, unbothered that the smell was mingled with his own at some points.
Sasuke… Naruto decided, recognizing the cool smell and relaxed further, trusting his friend and teammate implicitly.
Oh, he'd kick Sasuke's ass when his head stopped spinning, and he would be damned if the bastard was ever getting near him with those damn eyes again, but for the moment he felt safe to rest.
A deep warmth to his side drew him, and the closer he got, the deeper the smell became. Longing for the mind-easing aroma, Naruto pulled closer, his arm wrapping around a warm chest and pulling himself flush against a larger body.
A corner of his mind told him he should be panicking, but for the life of him he couldn't think of why. Then again, his brain felt a little like minced meat and anything that took a high range of thought process was doomed to be utterly ignored, which was why, when the large, warm body shifted—letting out a deep groan—and then rolled slightly in his direction, Naruto didn't even think to let go and only snuggled into the chest that now faced him.
"Huh?" The deep voice sounded older than Naruto remembered but, once again, Swiss cheese brain decided that it really wasn't important. "… Yonko?"
Groggily, the warm presence his senses kept telling him was Sasuke—but there was no way the bastard was that much bigger than he was—reached out and patted his head consolingly. Naruto shivered falling even more lax at the familiar gesture he'd watched kids receive from their parents and had wished that he too could have had it.
There was a soft sound, something between an amused, 'hn' and a snort. "Yonko, don't you think you're a little too old for this?"
Naruto continued to relax and tried to drift off to sleep. This weird Sasuke wasn't talking to him, so whoever this "fourth child" was, Naruto couldn't care in the least.
The pat turned into a gentle stroke, long fingers pulling through his blonde hair and Naruto sighed, pulling closer. Who would have thought that Sasuke could be such a cuddlier?
"Come on Yonko," Damn would that kid leave already, Naruto was too tired for this. "You're graduating from the ninja academy tomorrow. You and Ude are no longer babies, you yell this at Papa all the time don't you?"
Naruto couldn't help but smirk at that fact that Sasuke had just said Papa. It sounded horribly out of place and had he been less sleepy and dazed he might have laughed aloud.
"Yonko? Yonko, you're sister is big enough to sleep through the night on her own. Are you going to let Ude show you up?"
Naruto tried not to focus on the words so much as the sound of the voice, deep, calm, even. It made his body relax and Naruto was quickly fading when the body heat suddenly pulled away.
"Uh!" Naruto grunted reaching out for the warmth, but the dip of the bed let him know that Sasuke had stood up—presumably to send this, Yonko, back to bed. Naruto made a mental note to ask Sasuke who Yonko and Ude where when he woke up—and nearly screeched as he was suddenly lifted up into strong sturdy arms. He latched onto the neck, eyes still squeezed shut, and willed himself to calm when the sweet aroma that was Sasuke drifted from all around him.
The hell was that teme doing now?
"Come on, let's go back to bed. Papa will be home in the morning, and you don't want to lose that bet you had with him right?"
It became apparent Sasuke was speaking to him, and Naruto scrunched his face up in annoyance opening bleary blue eyes and pulling back to stare into pitch black orbs that suddenly grew wide with shock as Naruto opened his mouth.
"The hell's wrong with you, Sasuke-teme?"
He was promptly dropped.
Naruto groaned as he collided with the floor, knocking his poor sensitive head and making the world tilt dizzyingly. "Ow… damn it, what the hell, Sasuke?"
"N—Naruto?"
"Who else, bastard? Unless you have a habit of knocking people out with your dumb-ass eyes and then bringing them home." Naruto snapped sitting up and rubbing his head while willing the contents of his stomach to remain digested. "…. And who is Yonko?"
Sasuke blinked at him, looking fairly stunned before a dark look—Naruto had quickly learned meant that Sasuke had not found his joke funny and now would beat him senseless—came over his face.
"Dobe, when did you get home, why are you henged into that form, and stop joking around about that. It isn't funny, dumb ass." Sasuke seemed truly pissed and Naruto lifted an eyebrow wondering if maybe the sharingan had fried his brain.
"What do you mean, henged? I'm not even using my chakra! Stop making fun of my height damn it!" Naruto jumped to his feet, and it was then that he realized he only came up to the other's ribcage. "What the…hey! That's not fair bastard! Why are you henged into an adult?!"
"I'm not, idiot. I am an adult, you're the one pretending to be thirteen again."
"What?! When the hell did you grow up? And where the hell was I?" Naruto asked, feeling a little bit of dread building when reality chimed in reminding him that Sasuke didn't pull these kinds of pranks.
The Uchiha's look turned darker and he suddenly stepped closer. Out of preservation, Naruto stepped back in turn. This continued until he ran into the bed, toppling over onto his back with a light fwump. Naruto squeaked as Sasuke followed suite one of his knees indented the mattress at his side as two hands framed his face.
Naruto's heart started pounding in his ears as dark hair fell like a curtain around them as Sasuke's pale face drew close. Their noses tapped together and Naruto could feel the steady breathing of the other against his lips when he spoke in a voice low and husked. "You were beneath me Usaratonkachi, as we made our Izumi. Or do you not remember that?"
Naruto turned the color of Sakura's hair and squirmed uncomfortably as a smirk lifted one side of the Uchiha's lips. "Shall I remind you then, Naruto?" the voice dropped to a sultry quality, one Naruto had doubted anyone, especially the ice block Sasuke, could have made as it whispered to him. "Shall I show you how we made love that night? Make you whimper as I enter you? Why not change back Dobe, I don't want to molest you…"
One hand slid to cup his cheek as Naruto's jaw dropped in shock, then lips were moving in to capture his own.
Three seconds.
That was all it took for Naruto to call him a bastard and punch him square in the nose. Sasuke jerked back looking very offended holding his nose while Naruto scurried to the other side of the bed red with rage and unwittingly crying.
"Naruto, what the hell—"
"The fuck's wrong with you bastard?!" Naruto winced at the sob that came out with the words, especially when those black eyes flew to his own showing annoyance, fear, and concern. Unused to such looks, Naruto glared, calling a bit of Kyuubi's power to form a menacing look. "That's not funny. I'm a boy, dumb-fuck, you can't have babies with me or have you forgotten that little fact?"
Sasuke blinked, then his face turned expressionless as he asked. "Naruto, how old are you?"
"Thirteen, same as you!"
"What do you remember last?"
"What the hell does that have to—"
Sasuke set him with a glare that seemed a lot like Iruka's and it promptly shut him up. "Just answer the question, dobe."
Naruto scowled, crossed his arms and looked away. "You wanted to practice some new technique with your stupid blood limit and asked me to help."
Sasuke's brows pinched together as a sort of dread came to his eyes. "Have we already passed the Chunin exams?"
Now Naruto was certain Sasuke had fried his brains, because he had to be fucking crazy to have forgotten that.
"Naruto?"
"… last week. We finished the preliminaries last week. Kakashi and you went missing and then today," Naruto paused and looked out the window at the darkness beyond. "… er yesterday, we met up because both perverts decided they needed us to fetch water at the same time, and you tried the piece of shit Jitsu on me."
Obsidian widened once more as those eyes swung to his suddenly understanding. "So this is where you wen—oh." Sasuke suddenly smirked, mirth shining in his eyes. It was the most open expression—aside from the creepy lust filled one he'd received moments before—on the Uchiha since he'd known him.
"What?" Naruto snapped defensively.
"No wonder you didn't tell me."
Naruto felt his eye tick in annoyance. Sasuke was really starting to piss him off. "What didn't I tell you jack ass?" He hissed through clenched teeth, but Sasuke was hardly fazed by it.
He just grinned again, looking anything but innocent. "That you had a crash course with your 'Uzumaki PMS'."
The world had officially ended.
Naruto stared in horrified shock at the taller, older, looking Uchiha and gaped at him. He tied to close his mouth but it simply wouldn't stay shut. It kept un-hinging at the bizarre turn of events.
"Naruto? You okay? Hey, dobe." Sasuke started to move toward him, and Naruto jerked back finally freeing himself from the initial shock.
"Y—you… you just… just said… said… Uzumaki PMS…"
Sasuke lifted that single brow in the way that let Naruto know Sasuke thought he was brain dead. "Yes. Yes I did, dobe."
Naruto frowned, he may as well have just called him retarded. Naruto was ready to verbally mutilate the Uchiha when a starting thought came to mind, and with a shudder he turned to Sasuke, eyes haunted. "Jiraiya's not gay is he?"
Sasuke seemed startled at the sudden question and had to blink several times before answering. "Last I cared to check no. He's still peeping in the woman's bath and he nearly had a hear attack when you told him you were pregnant the second time."
Sasuke's eyes turned distant with an old ache, but Naruto was too pole-axed to truly catch that. "Will you stop insinuating that we have children together?!"
"We do Dobe. Three of them."
"Ah…" Naruto was uncertain how to respond to that dead serious expression, and just sat confused until Sasuke let out a frustrated sigh and sat in a chair he'd pulled from a desk across the room.
Naruto realized that he'd never seen this room before, and felt his stomach plummet further. "S—sasuke, where are we?"
"…" Sasuke steadied him with a firm look as though trying to see if he was worthy enough to know the truth. Finally he sighed and stopped glaring. "This is our house. We burnt down the old family home and built this shortly after Izumi was born."
"Who?"
"Our first born, Izumi Uchiha, Chunin as of two years ago." Sasuke replied sounding proud, and had Naruto not been on the other side of the royally-fucked-up-rainbow, he might have been shocked.
"I don't believe you."
Sasuke seemed not to care as he continued as though Naruto hadn't spoken at all, "That jitsu I tried was supposed to send your mind through 'time.'"
"Huh?"
"It was supposed to send you through your memories, as though you'd stepped back in time. You'd be there but not, obviously something went wrong and you actually came forward in time."
"Woah, wait, what?!" Naruto felt nauseous again.
"Listen, just keep quite until I'm done all right? You can ask all your stupid questions later, just… listen."
Yep, this was Sasuke all right.
"Whatever."
"Good. As I was saying, it threw you twenty years into the future, though I have no idea as to how this could be possible."
Naruto wanted to call Sasuke's bluff but he did look old, not too old, maybe around Kakashi's age, or Sakura's parents, and last he checked they hadn't been taught how to henge into an older version of themselves yet. In an attempt to keep his sanity, Naruto chuckled trying to make light of the situation.
"Okay, so, suspending reality for a moment, lets say I really do buy this load of shit you're feeding me."
Sasuke glared, Naruto ignored it.
"So, in twenty years we mysteriously decide to get together and have three children, through methods only god knows but probably had something to do with that ero-sanin, why are you telling me this now? Aren't you afraid that I'll change things? Because honestly I think you're an ass-tard, and I wouldn't have kids with you if you were the last mammal on earth."
"Eloquent dobe, I assume you mean you'd choose that damn fox that still pisses outside our door, hm?"
"What? What fox? What are you smoking?"
"Never mind." Sasuke shook his head and mumbled something that sounded oddly like 'damned fluffy bastard' but Naruto wasn't too certain.
"So?"
"So what?"
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because you don't believe it anyway, and if I'm going to stay awake until you leave I may as well stay entertained, and you are very amusing to watch."
"Dick."
"Yes, I have one. And you usually like it shoved up your—"
"ANYWAY!" Naruto cried, once again morbidly red. If he had his way he would never hear the end of that sentence, and he hated the grin that stretched Sasuke's face then. "If Izumi is the oldest, who is Yonko?"
Naruto was mortified to realize he had nothing to discuss except for their imaginary children, which easily could slide to other things. He wanted to ask if he was the Hokage, but didn't think he could stand the answer if it was a resounding no.
Sasuke's look turned mellow, kind even as he reached for one of the two photo's on the nightstand. The one left behind Naruto recognized as the group photo Kakashi had insisted on taking not more than a month ago of team seven, the other was turned away from him as Sasuke answered.
"Yonko is our youngest." Handing over the photo he stated calmly. "He's the blonde."
Naruto lost his breath as though he'd been kicked in the diaphragm. In his hand was a family portrait, though he assumed from the lack of himself or Sasuke, that they had wanted a picture of their children.
There was a thirteen-year-old in the back, one Naruto could have mistaken for Sasuke—the Sasuke he knew—if it hadn't been for the short shaggy bangs and bright blue eyes. Staring closer he saw faint lines—like birthmarks—upon all three of the children's cheeks. The blue-eyed boy—whom he could only assume was Izumi as he was the oldest in the photo—smiled warmly, his eyes calm and happy. Nothing like Sasuke's or his own for that matter.
In front of Izumi were two little nine-year-olds, they seemed to be fighting. The little girl had the same cobalt eyes that both her little brother and Sasuke shared, and her hair was as black and straight as Sasuke's would probably be if his hair wasn't so asinine. There was no refuting that the girl was an Uchiha, though her playful smile was too soft, especially as her younger brother pulled harshly on her pigtail, but it was obvious she'd won the war if the pinching fingers on her brother's arm were anything to go by.
Lastly, there was Yonko. Suddenly Naruto understood why Sasuke had mistaken him for the little boy. Yonko was the only blonde, and his hair was as unruly as Naruto's, though his bangs fell longer in the front, and parted in the center. It vaguely reminded Naruto of the Fourth Hokage's hair, though with the part it was more like Sasuke's. The boy was pale, and his eyes were a deep coal, but the shape of them was almost like looking into a mirror.
Naruto passed a finger over the image, and congratulated his brain on such a well done dream, because this could be nothing else. "How old…?" Naruto found himself questioning, and was a little surprised when Sasuke answered.
"Izumi turned seventeen last month. July seventh." Sasuke murmured, and Naruto's eyes sought out the grinning image of the eldest child. Naruto wondered just what it meant if he was having dreams of having children with Sasuke but again, harshly shoved it aside, certain it would bring nothing but bad luck. "And Ude and Yonko both turned thirteen last December. Tomorrow they graduate from the academy."
Naruto blinked, looking at the children in a sort of dazed awe, before returning the photo. "So, why Yonko?"
"Huh?" Sasuke asked, looking confused, and Naruto shook his head.
"Why, Yonko, why did we name him 'fourth child?' I mean I love the Yondaime and all but I wouldn't even name my kid after his title."
Sasuke smirked sadly, that old pain back again before he looked down at the photo in his hand, running his fingers over it slowly. Naruto was mildly shocked that he'd kept the Uchiha talking so long on something so personal, but assumed it was because this was his dream, and it was supposed to be twenty years in the future, and they were at least lovers, so why shouldn't Sasuke be different? Nice even?
Naruto colored again.
"Yonko is actually our fourth child, and we named him that in remembrance of our second born."
Naruto blinked, the chill in the room palpable. He had a feeling he didn't want to know where this was going, but his voice seemed stuck, and like all good nightmares he was unable to stop it.
"Saiai was still born."
Naruto swallowed thickly, hating his mind for being so cruel and realistic even in his mind. Of course there would be problems with a male pregnancy, and having three children was a minor miracle in itself, and unconsciously he wrapped his arms around himself. "Oh."
Sasuke nodded, "If she'd lived she would be sixteen as of April fourteenth." Sasuke grew quiet, and Naruto fidgeted.
He decided he didn't like this dream, and he didn't want to think about the little girl they had lost, but found himself opening his mouth and asking anyway. "What did she look like?"
The real Sasuke was right. He needed a muzzle.
Sasuke looked up, his eyes a little sad as he responded, looking past Naruto as though back in time with the baby. "She looked just like you, though her hair was as red as fire, and although most babies are born with blue eyes and then the pigment shows up later, I think her eyes would have remained blue."
A heavy silence fell after that, and Naruto couldn't help but fidget. "I don't think you ever got over Saiai's death."
Naruto hunched his shoulders, feeling rather awkward, and decided that enough was enough, it was time he took control of this wacky nightmare.
"How do I know you're not bullshitting me?" Naruto asked, staring up at the older Sasuke, though his glare was rather stunted, and now more curious than angered. "I mean this could just be a genjitsu… though why'd you'd make all this up for a prank is beyond me…"
"Naruto." The voice was suddenly close, and Naruto darted his eyes up from where they had strayed to his folded hands, and he found Sasuke unbearably close again, warm hands cupping his cheeks. There was no time to move this time as warm lips pressed to his in a soft, gentle contact.
Naruto sucked in a breath at the simple contact that lasted barely a moment, before the other pulled back smirking at him, one hand sliding up to ruffle his hair. "Well, for one thing, even I wouldn't be brave enough to do that to you even in a genjutsu, nor would I feel comfortable saying how much I love your stupid ass."
Naruto felt his face heat and he tried to tell himself it was all just a dream, and besides that he shouldn't feel anything after something like that aside from disgust. So why was he insanely happy?
He rubbed under his nose, attempting to hide his smile and bush, but he doubted it worked even if Sasuke didn't tease him for it.
"Besides," Sasuke leaned close again, resting his forehead against Naruto's as he grinned. "How else would I know Kyuubi is a bitch and not a bastard?"
Blank. His mind was a complete blank.
Sasuke knew about Kyuubi, and didn't care in the least. Some part of his brain told him that of course dream Sasuke would know this, and another still told him that something important had just been mentioned but like everything else that night he was unconcerned with the small warnings as again his world was thrown to hell as the bedroom door creaked open.
"Sasuke, what are you still doing up, bastard? We have to be up for the graduation… Yonko? What's wrong, did he have another nightm—"
Blue locked on blue, and both shard a gasp.
Naruto was officially over that fucked-up-rainbow and he was willing to wear those red slippered shoes that made Rock Lee look macho, and prance down the yellow road with a little Akamaru at his heels.
Because he, Naruto Uzumaki—or would he be Naruto Uchiha—was wearing the robes of a Hokage.
This was the best dream ever!
-This is a line. If you can't see the line below, it is because sucks! That is all……..-
He was laying on the ground with the sun in his eyes, which sucked because the last thing he remembered was seeing himself in the Hokage's robes and just knowing that he would get there.
"Hey, Dobe, you alive?" The voice was deep but higher than it was the last time he'd heard it. Blinking Naruto tilted his head to the side and squinted at the shadowed image crouched over him.
"Dobe? Come on, I know your brain is rather small but it can't be poor enough that I fried it could it?"
Naruto scowled. Yep, he was back in reality all right.
"Shove it, dick-wad."
Sasuke's shoulders sagged just barely in relief as he sat back resting his elbows on his knees, pressing his lips to his linked fingers. It was an odd pose for sitting Indian style, but it fit the Uchiha and Naruto sat up slowly, placing his hand to his forehead, thankful that his lunch stayed where it should.
"Shit, what'd you do to me?" Naruto whined, "Knock me out and beat me with a rock?"
"Where did you go?"
"Huh?" Naruto asked, turning to face the Uchiha. Seemed he was being serious so Naruto fixed him with a flat look. "To see the rock elves of course. The only way to meet them is to be pummeled by your teammate while unconscious. They made me their king and threw a huge party for my arrival and… why are you looking at me like that?"
It was hard not to laugh at the slack-jawed expression on Sasuke's face, as though he wasn't sure weather to believe him or not, and Naruto rolled his eyes wondering how the idiot could possibly even toy with the idea.
"I'm kidding bastard, geeze, don't have a heart attack."
There the scowl was back.
"Where did you go Dobe?"
"Why do you think I went any—" Naruto broke off with the memory of a deep voice and steady words.
"It was supposed to send you through your memories, as though you'd stepped back in time. You'd be there but not, obviously something went wrong and you actually came forward in time."
Naruto snapped his mouth shut, his face heating up as he stood, all too unnerved with what had happened and what Sasuke was saying. He didn't want to know if Sasuke was joking, or if he was serious, as far as Naruto was concerned it was nothing more than a dream and that was how it was going to stay.
Pursing his lips, Naruto stood and stomped off in the direction he'd come from, completely ignoring the empty canteen he'd been told to fill.
"Hey! Naruto? What the hell, where are you going?"
"Away."
"Wait! What did you see—"
Naruto rounded on him so fast, he thought he saw the Uchiha jump when he growled. "Nothing! I saw nothing, damn it, now go away."
He was quite pleased when the jerk listened for once and stood his ground as the distance between them grew. At the last moment, Naruto turned and called back, a little stunned that Sasuke had yet to move, "And Sasuke, next time you want to 'practice' use Sakura as your god-damned guinea pig!" With that he took off running, hoping that maybe if he ran fast enough he could escape the already fading memory of his dream.
Sasuke was simply confused.
OwariA.N. It is completed, the crazed one shot that came from no where. I wanted to play with the twins since we don't get to see them in Kyuubi the Bitch, and I don't know if Saiai will even be mentioned anyway, on to why they are named why they are named:
Izumi: (Is explained in later chapters of Kyuubi the Bitch so you can wait) Typical happy child. Lazy to a fault, but an Uchiha regardless. He is put in a genin team with Kakashi and the two compete/back each other up with their excuses. He is best known for lying with a completely straight face. His dream is to be just like his Papa. He wants to be Hokage.
Saiai: Beloved. You can guess why.
Ude: (Five minutes older than Yonko) Means Skill. She was the first to activate the Sharingan out of their children and excels at almost anything. She is a little tomboy and can be a little snot, but if you mess with her little brother she will rip you to shreds.
Yonko: Obviously forth child, and obviously why. He actually fails his exam and cant graduate as planned. He is the last one to activate the sharingan and is always messing up. He's easily frightened of ghosts and "monsters" but can handle shinobi work. He quickly becomes the most powerful of the children when pushed too far on a mission. His dream is to make anbu and show Ude up.
Please leave a review. -