"Can I keep it?"

The Doctor groaned. He didn't know, where Rose suddenly got this strange affinity to catch strange creatures and hide them in her bedroom (maybe it was something she ate?), but it began to annoy him. Really annoy him.

From their first journeys on, the Doctor knew that Rose was unusually unaffected by meeting supposedly 'disgusting' creatures, while other women would scream their heads off. Spiders, sea monsters, snakes... where other people screwed up their nose, she 'awww'-ed and expressed her desire to cuddle them.

So, for the last few weeks the Doctor had been busy with keeping slimy and hairy things out of his beloved TARDIS... but no such luck this time.

"Oh no, young girl! Get it out of here in this instant or I... or I..." Argh! It should be prohibited to pout with lips like that! "Or I won't buy you a birthday present!" Okay, that was lame...

"But Doctoooor!" Rose hugged the brown haired creature tightly and looked pleadingly at him. "He is veeeery well behaved and can sleep in my room. Won't disturb you in the slightest, really. Pretty please?"

The Doctor's jaw clenched. He could keep up with gigantic snakes and tentacles, but that was simply too much.

With one long stride, he was beside Rose's wanna-be pet, grabbed him by the neck and chucked him out of the TARDIS. Before Rose was able to protest, the Doctor slammed the door shut and began to jump around the console. The ship dematerialised and shuddered violently when it began to move through the vortex.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Rose asked apparently outraged but with a hint of amusement in her voice.

The Doctor shot her a fierce look. "Believe me, I travelled quite a lot in my life and your little 'cute' friend-" He pointed at the now closed door. "-wasn't as well behaved as you might think..."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" she asked, frowning.

He looked sternly at her. "If you want to cuddle something brown haired and cute... cuddle me," he answered flatly, making Rose wonder if she was supposed to laugh or not.

"E-Eh?"

Meanwhile on Earth, Los Angeles, year 2008...

The 'creature' stared back at the place, where the strange blue box disappeared and tried to comprehend what just happened to him.

1. A hot blond chick appeared, squealed and dragged him off (no complaints there...)

2. She brought him to that blue box, that appeared to be bigger on the inside and hid him in her cupboard. Okay, she was a lunatic but still hot... so no complaints here either

3. He was found by a man clad in brown pinstripes (her boyfriend?) and saved by Blondy when said man apparently wanted to kill him with a silvery, whirring... thing. (okay, now he had complaints, alright!)

4. Blondy and pinstripes (nickname or title 'Doctor'?) talked about him like he was some kind of animal, while Blondy cut off his blood circulation in his arm with her squeezing...

5. He got thrown out of the blue box and it vanished right in front of him

He stared a few more minutes into space, then shrugged and walked back to his trailer. Being an actor, Orlando Bloom sure had stranger days in his life...