The Best Kisses

Author: Tennak

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Rangiku Matsumoto + her favourite kisser

Wordcount: Approx. 2000

Warnings: Language, mentions of adult relations & things.

Spoilers: None I can think of.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach! None of the characters I use are below the ages of consent in my story!

Summary: Captain Hitsugaya throws his lieutenant a birthday party with all the trimmings and it's absolutely same procedure as last year! Oneshot. Happy birthday, Matsumoto!

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Captain Hitsugaya was getting very pissed. That infuriating woman! Not only did she not do her fair share of the daily paperwork, but she also tended to treat everyone as her personal assistants, even him, her captain!

And now this! When the division was clearly preoccupied with the war preparations he was expected to throw her a birthday party and turn their proud assembly hall into a temple of sin, at least if his useless lieutenant had her way.

Actually the worst part was that she was so popular that everyone wanted to help with the preparations and all this week 10th division had been overrun by a host of shinigami from other divisions, not to mention the small flock of young people centred around the loud mouth substitute from the living world.

Sometimes he was quite sure that any divine entity, that was overseeing the lives of the inhabitants of Soul Society, would start laughing every time he showed his face. All he wanted was peace!

And he got this! Pandemonium!

3rd seat Madarame, lieutenant Tetsuzaemon and captain Kyoraku had spend the day, oh yes, the entire day, picking up enough sake and assorted spirits from the living world to fill a bar along one wall.

Well that is to say … Captain Kyoraku had been picked up himself, late in the afternoon by his ever industrious lieutenant Ise. Oh, Hitsugaya whished that he had one like her. A practical, smart, conscientious, working woman who could help him take care of the division.

5th seat Ayasegawa had spend the day overlooking the people doing the decorations and their hall had gradually changed from it's bright and airy feel to a much more dark and seedy.

They had succeeded in building what looked like an old fashioned, western-style nightclub with purple drapes all along the walls and purple tablecloths. He wondered briefly how Ayasegawa had gotten hold of all that purple material? Ah, well.

Eventually everything had been ready, the drapes closed and the candles on the tables lighted. An exclamation of appreciation could be heard as everyone present was swept away by the magic of the room.

In the background you could hear the auburn haired girl from the living world congratulate Ayasegawa on his accomplishment. They giggled together and Hitsugaya was again reminded that relationships between others came so easy, yet seemed so difficult for him personally.

The festivities had commenced when the key figure had arrived. She had enjoyed the room and started to hug everyone around her.

The most fun had been when the loud mouth substitute from the living world had been caught by her and had to tangle his way out of her rather big assets, appearing completely stunned and speechless afterwards.

If he had to be honest, he himself always felt the same way when he had been caught up in her "assets" but he had luckily kept himself well out of her reach this evening.

She had unpacked her gifts to loud cheering from the crowds and much hugging following each parcel. The one gift that gained the loudest grins had been from the lieutenants Tetsuzaemon, Abarai, Hisagi and Izuru.

He had actually no idea what it was but it looked like a rounded short staff in black and metallic and it required batteries to function. Maybe it was something to use in a kitchen? Then the joke was on the givers as his lieutenant's sole accomplishment in a kitchen was to be able to boil water for tea.

He had later noticed 5th seat Ayasegawa together with the Inoue girl from the living world carefully examining the thing and turning it over in their hands in a way that was suggesting that the thing might not be for use in a kitchen after all.

After that everything escalated into eating, drinking and dancing. His lieutenant had been busy dancing with everybody, both males and females, and he had seen kisses exchanged all around.

When captain Kyoraku had swung her, he had latched on to her mouth and stayed there. That had looked hot! Even he could tell that this was an experienced man kissing a woman with want.

Before the song had ended lieutenant Hisagi had grabbed her and continued the kissing trying to do better than the captain. At this time most of the other dancers on the floor had stopped dancing to watch the kissing pair.

The sharp looking man tried his best but when he was out of breath and had to let go, she pushed him away with a big grin on her face and in stead grabbed the furiously blushing lieutenant Izuru.

He got bend over backwards in a kind of tango hold and she was kissing him without letting him catch his breath. Eventually he fell to the floor looking exhausted. This was becoming kind of interesting, captain Hitsugaya thought to himself.

She made short work of 7th seat Yamada and the young guy from 6th division, the guy who followed lieutenant Abarai around. The two young guys had been dancing together and she had simply grabbed them both, one under each arm.

Then captain Zaraki in turn grabbed her and held her arms firmly in place by her side, lifting her to reach her mouth. You could have heard a needle fall to the floor as everyone gawked at the sight expecting trouble.

He kissed her slowly and almost lovingly proving to all the gawking spectators that he was a man of great passion rather than the kill loving monster everyone thought. When he let her go she looked cross-eyed and out of it. The silence was deafening.

Then he loosened his grip and she promptly threw her arms around his neck loudly demanding more kisses. There was a sigh of relief to be heard and then lieutenant Abarai cheered loudly leading everybody on in clapping, stamping and shouts of approval.

Even the small captain watching let a sigh of relief slip. He had half expected to have to save his lieutenant from the big captain, but that had actually been fun to watch.

Subsequently a lot of people, both sexes, had lined up for birthday kisses from the happily blushing woman. And some time later the small Kuchiki woman had sought him out, grabbing his arm and pulling him along to stand in front of his lieutenant.

Rukia Kuchiki had hugged and kissed the sweating woman, pulling her down to reach her and then whispering something in her ear. He could not hear what was said but then his lieutenant grabbed him and bend to hug him and whisper in his ear.

"Thank You for giving me this party. You are the best and brightest and most amazing captain a lieutenant could work with."

She hugged him for the longest time almost squeezing all the air from his lungs. He was very close to pushing her away, but realized that once a year it was good to be held so lovingly.

Everyone cheered the two head officers of 10th division, and as she let him go, she bend over, kissed him on the cheek and nuzzled his face. "Thanks again, Toshiro!"

He was blushing and a little out of it, when he was grabbed from both sides. He looked to see who it was and had captain Kyoraku under one arm and captain Ukitake under the other. They both smiled at him and congratulated him on his feisty lieutenant.

Captain Ukitake politely requested his presence in a small celebratory meeting over by the bar and he felt that he had to consent to the request of the pleasantly polite man and his obnoxious and probably drunk friend.

Later he had realized for himself that falling in with the crowd surrounding captain Kyoraku might not have been the sanest idea of the evening. Apparently everything could be an object of a toast and shortly he had a swirling vision of all Matsumoto's friends dancing around him with big cups of sake, toasting and toasting and … toasting.

Renji had managed to catch the small captain as he descended towards the floor. He looked drunkenly surprised at the captain and decided to deposit him along side Chad, who was debating animatedly with Orihime and Uryu.

Renji turned to gaze astonish at the big guy. He could talk! And talk a lot it seemed. He had grabbed Ichigo to show him but the young guy just pulled him along to the dance floor.

In another corner Ikkaku had set up a table for a game of poker. He had asked Matsumoto if she had anything they could use for chips and she had promptly gathered her captain's expensive set of mahjong tiles.

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You could say that everything progressed according to plan, it was Matsumoto's birthday after all.

The few people still standing were beginning to stagger out. The room looked like a battle field with shinigami, platters, cups and bottles strewn all over the place. Some tables were turned over and the tablecloths used as togas.

Ikkaku was wearing one such toga and Yumichika was trying his best to pinch his bottom. No such luck but he kept the chase up.

Rukia was mostly unharmed and wandered about the room taking inventory. She was trying to locate all the young ones from the living world. Not that they would be harmed as such but she knew of at least 30 guys who would love to bring Orihime back to their barracks and maybe 100 woman who would love the same of Chad.

As she walked the room she spotted that Shuhei and Kira had fallen together. Matsumoto's parties always revealed something new about people. Who would have thought that Kira wore a red fundoshi?

She said hi to Yachiru who lay on her stomach drawing a big picture of all her drunken friends directly on the beautiful wooden floor of 10th division's assembly hall. Maybe 4th division would be busy tomorrow?

She found Uryu, Chad, Orihime and captain Hitsugaya laying in a pile. The captain, or someone else, had draped his captain's coat over as much of them as it could cover. It wasn't much but they seemed to be sleeping nicely if the sounds was anything to go by.

She stood up trying to find a trace of orange or red anywhere when Matsumoto came striding towards her, motioning that she should follow.

The two guys had apparently fallen victim to way to much dancing and drinking, sleeping close together on the floor.

Matsumoto put her arm around Rukia's shoulders. "They look cute, don't they?"

As the two women watched them, Ichigo snaked his arm around Renji's waist and pulled the larger man closer nuzzling his neck.

Rukia turned to look at Matsumoto. "You think they'll learn this time?"

She looked thoughtful then shook her head. "No, not yet. Someday."

"I hope someday soon." Rukia glanced at her friend. "It's so frustrating to watch those two morons tiptoe around each other and be in constant denial. Those idiots!"

The older woman smiled at her. "Patience Rukia. Someday."

Both women turned as they felt the presence of the imposing captain Kuchiki right behind them. Rukia acknowledged him with a whisper of "Brother" and Matsumoto smiled at him.

Then Matsumoto moved to the side so he could enjoy the sight of his lieutenant curled up with Ichigo. He shook his head and said in a quiet voice. "Almost as cute as a bunch of puppies." He hesitated and then continued in a brusque tone. "Don't tell them I said so."

Both women giggled.

Byakuya turned to Rukia. "You passed on my message?"

"Off course."

He smiled and motioned with his hand like he would push her towards the door. "Now you go, Rukia, straight home!"

This was said in a teasing voice that Rukia had never before heard Byakuya use. She turned to look questioningly at him.

He motioned her again. "Yes you go."

Matsumoto smiled at her. "We'll look after the kiddies."

Rukia thought that this was real strange but decided to do as he asked.

They stood close together and watched her leave.

Then Byakuya placed his arms around her waist and drew her close to him.

She grinned at him. "I knew you'd come."

"Don't I always?" His voice was suddenly much lower and husky. He placed an elegant finger on top of her breasts and played with the chain hanging between them.

"Byakuya!" She sounded breathless.

He grinned at her looking so unlike his usual stoic self that it surprised even her. "And you've kissed everyone?"

She cocked an eyebrow. "Don't I always?"

He laughed silently as he bend to scoop her up into his arms and whispered seductively. "Happy birthday, my cherry-flower! Same procedure as last year?"

"Oh, yes please!"

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END

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AN:

1) A fundoshi is a kind of loincloth. An approx. 2,40 x 0,30 meters piece of cotton wrapped around the male anatomy. Check it in Wikipedia if you want to know more.

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2) The thing that Rukia whispered in Matsumoto's ear: "Brother says he will bring your gift later. Whatever that means?"

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3) And no, captain Hitsugaya did not want 4th division to clean up after the party. He forced his own division to do it! And Matsumoto didn't show up till long after every trace of the party had been removed.

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4) I am aware that Byakuya is not like himself in this story. When I asked him about it, he claimed that it was just for this one day every year.

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5) I know that Matsumoto & Byakuya doesn't work as a couple, but I'm sure she would love to go shopping in the living world with a gold credit card in the name Kuchiki.