A/N: We thought of this story while discussing Joker/Batman while high on muffins and sleep deprivation at 5am, so this is basically a load of randomness. Please read Eleris Joker origin story its amazing! We apologize for any spelling or grammar mistakes.
Vicky and Sarah
Disclaimer: We don't own Harry Potter, Narnia, Looney Tunes or Las Vegas. If we did do think we'd be on here?
Once upon a time in the Slytherin boys dormitory, Draco and Blaise were arguing over weather Harry Potter was gay.
"Oh please, he's so far in the closet he's bumming Mr Tumnus!" Draco exclaimed loudly, throwing open the closet for dramatic effect. "OMG NARNIA!!" The boys eyes widened momentarily and they gaped for a few seconds as the grasped what really was in Narnia.
"Well i guess you were right." said Blaise, because there in front of them was Harry bumming Mr Tumnus. Draco didn't seem to have a reply. As Harry thrust his magic wand, Mr Tumnus gasped and shook on his hooves. Draco and Blaise swiftly moved out of the house, only to run into Peter and Susan Pevensie. Coincidentally Blaise and Peter locked eyes and instantly fell in love. They started singing 'Were soaring, flying' while skipping of into the sunset to get married.
Susan looked from the sunset to Draco and said: "Well that was-"
"Shut up" interrupted Draco growling slightly.
Susan blinked. "Um, I was just... www-wait where did you get that hammer?" she stammered. WHACK! All that was left of Susan was one finger. All of sudden Prince Caspian appeared from nowhere and white light was shining on him from every direction. Draco squinted in the light.
"Draco Malfoy?" The prince asked. Draco nodded wearily. Prince Caspian moved forward and the light dimmed but Draco remained frozen.
"You saved me. That stalker wouldn't stop following me; demanding autographs, interviews and to co-star in my next movie. It was all to much." Prince Caspian said softly barely acknowledging the fact that there was only a finger left of Susan. Suddenly Caspian jumped Draco and the started making out. They unanimously decided to elope, so they both jumped on Caspians horse, Gok, who was told to take them to Vegas.
"Oh honey those pants are so last season." Gok told Draco sypathetically. He glared at the horse and they rode off into the sunset.
Meanwhile...
"W-what are you saying Mr Tumnus?" Harry asked the fawn shakily, his eyes tearful.
"Harry i'm sorry, it's not you, its me." Mr Tumnus said somewhat confidently.
"Ahhh you fucking son of a bitch, GET OUT!" Harry shouted. Regardless of the fact it was his house, Mr Tumnus left.
Mr Tumnus moped around Narnia for a bit until he felt a sudden wieght on his bak "umm...God?" He guessed
"No, now shut your mouth and make babies with me!"
"Lucy?" Mr Tumnus turned his head to see the youngest Pevinsie clinging to him. "What are you - mmph!" They had Sex Magically cute babies appeared and they all moved to Vegas.
Harry was looking a tad depressed and so Edmund conveniently appeared like magic from the fireplace. Harry looked at him with a glassy look in his eyes and finally realised that it wasn't Mr Tumnus he loved it was Edmund.
"I love you" Confessed Harry.
"I love you too" Replied Edmund, And they ran to each other in slow motion and cheesy love music started playing. long story short, they had sex
Randomly Dumbledore appeared with sparkles in a pink frilly dress with stars and swirls on and started to do the can-can. Harry and Edmund were a bit 'preocupied' to notice.
"And they all lived happily ever after" Announced Dumbledore merrily in a cliche way, Bugs bunny bounced in a bunny-like way (appropriately) and spoke cheerfully: "That's all folks!"
Snape who had witnessed the entire thing in disgust, now utterly confused exclaimed: "What the Fuck!"
The End