Eeeep. A long delay I know but I do have a good reason. I have been job hunting for a while now and recently managed to get several interviews which unfortunately also needed prep time. It has sort of left me mentally drained and behind on my writing, but has turned out to be worth the effort as now I have a new job starting in October. As long as nothing goes wrong, fingers crossed.

Anyway, here it is. Enjoy.

Coming home

Zack couldn't believe how slowly the transport vehicle was moving, the miles seeming to pass by at a leisurely pace while the minutes and hours hurried along without pause. A quick glance at both the clock on the dashboard and the mile gauge showed that they were in fact making decent time for the distance being covered, but still it wasn't enough. His body almost screaming that it would be quicker to just get out and run back for Gaia's sake.

"Have patience Pup. We'll be back soon." Angeal's voice spoke softly, the soothing tone helping to calm the soldier's restlessness a little even as he blushed at the use of his old nick-name once more.

"Angeal." He whined playfully, the almost expected response making the older man smile fondly as it reinforced the mood he was trying to set. "Not in front of the guys."

Yes, just like old times Angeal mused thoughtfully. A brighter smile forming on his rugged features as Zack looked at him in a way that was both embarrassed but also proud of the alternative name.

"We've got at least two hours before the Compound comes into view." The commander pointed out, a flicker of something partially frustrated appearing in violet orbs before they looked way from him and towards the horizon once more.

"I know and I'm trying, I swear."

"I know you are pup, but watching the clock isn't going to make the time pass any quicker."

Sighing Zack shook his head and smiled at the words, his expression becoming tender and his voice dropping to almost a whisper as he spoke again.

"I miss him Angeal, like seriously miss him. It's driving me nuts knowing he's only a few hours away."

"I understand that Zack, I do." The commander replied, his words mimicking the soldier's volume in an attempt to give their conversation some measure of privacy when taking place amongst a group of mako enhanced men. "But you can't let it affect you like this."

This time when Zack sighed it sounded heavy-hearted and Angeal knew he was to blame for the sudden change in his puppy's mood. The calm he had hope to instil actually turning out to be like a bucket of cold water on the soldier's previously cheerful state of mind.

"Everything about him affects me Angeal, you know that." The raven haired teen replied neutrally, his previously bright violet eyes now saddened as they turned to look out the side window and silently signal the end of their conversation.

For a moment the commander couldn't breathe let alone speak, even if he'd wanted to, his heart skipping a beat as his brain kicked into overdrive and thoughts spiralled out of control within his head.

Gaia, when had that happened? When had Zack grown up to become so serious? When had his hyperactive, carefree pupil actually become tainted by things which could make him sound so sad? But deep down inside Angeal knew when it had started, understood that the hurt of losing someone you cared for dearly could create a wound that might never heal properly. He also realised that the damage that injury had caused would never truly be fixed, that there might always be a scar on the young soldier's heart which would never fade away. Except, maybe with Cloud.

Maybe with the blonde there was hope that Zack would be able to let go of that past hurt, maybe he would be able to finally move on and completely let go of the pain which still lingered. Maybe the soldier would stop carrying around a ghost of the only other person he'd felt this way for, of regrets only he knew or understood, and be able to let himself love again. Because wasn't that what Zack deserved, to be able to love freely and without fear of losing that. To care for another and know that those feelings were not only returned, but that he was needed just as much as he needed them. And Cloud did need him, the cadet so fragile in his own way that it was hard to believe he'd made it this far. Yet, within that same vulnerability was a core of strength that seemed to have become a pillar for Zack as well. Something which kept them both standing tall together, even when their emotional baggage weighed them down and tried to trip them along the way.

Unfortunately thoughts of the blonde quickly flashed through his mind and brought up other concerns which still troubled him, things that he hated to consider but found himself unable to ignore. It was no secret that for all his strengths the young man was unstable, his actions while they were away being proof enough of that, and worries about the cadet's current state of mind raised more red flags then the commander was willing to admit too. Inside his heart twisted as he considered the harm which could befall Zack if Cloud ended up breaking again, of the pain his pup would be forced to endure if the blonde snapped and did something drastic. The result of which would have Zack losing another loved one and probably pushing the soldier over the edge forever and changing him in a way that could never be reversed.

It had been painful to watch a part of who Zack was slip away after Kyle died, his young pupil's spirit seeming to fade away as if there wasn't a real reason for him to be happy anymore. Gaia bless Reno and the others for being there, for being the support his pup needed at such a heart-breaking time in his life. But now there was a chance of true happiness, in getting back all of the boy he'd lost, but only if things with Cloud worked out. And spirits curse him but he wanted his pup to be truly happy again, wanted the young man to finally be complete within himself once more, even if it was a risk to let it happen. After all, their relationship wasn't exactly the easiest one going.

Not only was there the difference in rank between them, there was also the issues relating to their mentorship status. No pupil and tutor were allowed to become involved, it just made things too complicated and blurred the boundaries of what was appropriate. There was also the matter relating to Cloud's mental health, one which had more shit attached to it than Angeal wanted to deal with right now. If the higher ups found out a mentor was having a relationship with his pupil, one who was currently living with him after a mental breaking down, and potential suicide attempt, it wasn't going to go down well.

Groaning softly to himself, and running a large calloused hand over his face, Angeal lent back and tried to clear his mind of everything. His body suddenly feeling much older than he really was due to the emotional mental baggage he was now placing upon himself. Surely there had to be an easy way to deal with this, a way that would make Cloud safe around others and within himself, a way to make the soldier beside him safe from persecution of abusing his mentor position, and a way to support their relationship so that both boys could be free to love each other without fear of separation or persecution from others.

The slight jostling to his left leg drew a weary brown eye down to one side to see what had bumped against him, the unconscious jerking of a puppy's right leg as it bounced lightly beside him bringing a warm smile to the commander's lips. At least some things never changed, even if the boy … no, the man himself was growing up. Closing his eyes Angeal relaxed back and let the sway of the truck carry him away, the comforting feel of Zack's toned thigh bumping restlessly against him soothing the ache which had begun to form and letting him know that somehow they would make sure everything turned out alright. Whatever the cost.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Back at the compound Cloud was equally fixated on the time as he fired another round of bullets at the target in front of him, his mind once again only half focused on the task at hand due to his wandering thoughts.

It hadn't taken long to decode the message, the numbers and letters being transcribed easily once the formula was worked out and put into place. The words had been simple really, a basic hello and we'll be back soon, and not what the cadet had been hoping for. Not by a long shot.

Maybe it was selfish of him but Cloud knew he'd wanted more, no, he'd needed more. Zack had been gone for a whole week damn it, five whole days without seeing him and that had to count for something. Alright, so they had technically spoken a couple of times. But still. Would it have hurt the soldier to say he was missing him? He could have easily hidden the confession in the form of it relating it to something else they did together, his words perhaps being something like 'I can't wait to train again' or 'I've been missing our sparring sessions'. Hell, the soldier hadn't even called him Spiky in the message and as annoying as the name could be it had actually hurt when it was forgotten like that.

It was almost like a naturally born reflex to lift a new magazine from the table when the gun in his hand forced it's last bullet into the chamber and he fired, the empty clip being ejected from the weapon and automatically replaced with another in the blink of an eye. He didn't even take a breath as he continued to fire, each metal slug tearing through the target and letting the two suited figures behind him know that something was once again wrong with the blonde in their care.

"Holly shit." Cissnei breathed, her softly spoken curse making Reno smile despite the situation.

After all, it wasn't often that the brunette used words like that or showed surprise at another's actions so openly.

"He's a machine, isn't he?" The red head sighed heavily, his sea-green eyes glancing to the side to briefly connect with worried hazel coloured orbs.

"You said he was good." The female Turk replied quietly, her gaze once again drifting back to the blonde in front of them. "But you never said he was this good."

"He works hard and it shows."

"No kidding."

Reno couldn't help but smirk then. Not because of the words themselves but more due to the way they had been spoken, almost as if Cissnei was in some way awed by the young cadet's abilities. Of course, it could also be that she hadn't taken his praise for the blonde seriously when feeding back Cloud's scores on the range the day before.

Anything the red head wanted to say was quickly cut off by the sound of the cadet's last clip emptying, his removal of the magazine and clearing of the chamber being smooth and perfectly performed as was expected. It not only showed a good knowledge and understanding for weapons but also respect for them as well, one where the safety and welfare of the user and the people around them were clearly being considered.

"Good work." Cissnei called out as Cloud removed his protective heard gear, the Turk's quickly removing their own now that it was safe to do so. "You want to use a different weapon or reload and practice on an alternative target?" She asked, her question receiving a decline of the offer as the cadet shook his head.

"I need to clear my head. Can we get out of here for a bit?"

"Sure Blondie. Where did you want to go?"

Reno could almost guess the answer to his question based on the way Cloud's expression seemed strained, his sapphire eyes bright with the need to be free of something that was now suffocating him. Something they couldn't see but knew was there nevertheless.

"I want to run for a bit." Was all the cadet needed to say to confirm the red head's thoughts, his words drawing a tired yet understanding smile on the Turk's lips.

"You want some company?"

It was a carefully made offer with just enough emotion to show he cared, one that hoped for an acceptance of it but without pushing for one to be given.

"Actually, that would be good."

Reno smiled then, a genuine upward curve of lips, and his turquoise eyes sparkled happily as Cloud once again showed he was not hiding away from them. That even though he needed to escape himself and the current world around him, he was not leaving them behind as he did so.

Ten minutes later found the guns and ammunition all packed away and locked back in their storage cabinets, the job of cleaning them being temporarily put on hold for a few hours while something more important was taken care of. While something more necessary was done. And then five minutes after that found a blonde, a brunette and a red head disappearing into the undergrowth beside the Turk training building, their distinctive forms melting into the bushes and becoming one with the shadows unnoticed by all around them. Well maybe not all.

Tseng sighed with mock exasperation as he watched them go and shook his head in mild amusement, a tender smile forming briefly on his normally stoic features at their actions knowing that there was currently no one around to actually see it. He didn't know what had possessed them all to play outside as they were now doing, but whatever it was must have been important. The speed at which they had been moving and the direction they had taken showing that their movements had more purpose than simple being to get some fresh air.

For a brief moment he considered that they were checking the perimeter fence as part of the cadet's training, but almost as soon as it was thought the idea was dismissed. If that was the case then Reno or Cissnei would have been in the lead, not Cloud. The young man clearly the one choosing which path they would be taking on this occasion. It was then that the head Turk realised just how effortlessly the cadet's movements had been, how quickly and efficiently he'd blended into his surroundings and become one with the environment so that his form became easily hidden within the dense undergrowth. In fact, it was actually quite impressive.

"Perhaps the things I have been hearing about you are not so far fetched." Tseng murmured to himself, his words barley a whispered breath though no one was actually around to him them. After all, you could never be too careful in this place.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

They ran, golden, red and brown hair flicking briefly as they moved through the undergrowth, the vibrant and very distinctive colours of two men being the only thing to occasionally give away their positions had anyone been looking for them. Cloud smiled brightly as the wind swept past him, as the scent of freedom filled his senses and his feet were allowed to move as they wished over the earth covered floor beneath him. Deep in his heart he knew it was fake, understood that the soil had been artificially moved there to create some sort of outside effect, but it didn't matter. So what if he wasn't at home in the mountains, so what if the air carried on the breeze was not clean and pure, right now he was able to run and that was all that mattered.

It also helped that he wasn't alone, that the two who accompanied him made him feel safer somehow with their presence. Neither had spoken as he'd led the way out the back door and down into the shrubbery, each suited figure remaining silent as they had effortlessly followed his jean covered arse along a path which was familiar to only him.

It was as they drew nearer to the dead gardens that he felt something within them change, the tension forming like a wall at his back. Still they said nothing as he weaved a way towards the dense undergrowth, the muscles in his legs now burning as they finally began to tire of this hopeless attempt at fleeing the things within his mind. Slowing to a stop Cloud allowed himself to draw a deep steadying breath and wipe the sweat from his brow with one of his long sleeves, the action quickly bringing his injured arm into their line of sight and making their current location seem even more inappropriate.

"Cloud. Why'd you bring us here?"

It was a good question and one the blonde wasn't sure how to answer just yet, his heart still beating a deep accelerated rhythm in his chest as it tried to move the much needed air from his lungs into oxygen starved cells. In truth he wasn't sure why he'd come back here, why it had been important to return to this place, why he now stood here looking for something that he wasn't even sure could be found.

"I … I just … needed to." The cadet began, uncertain how to explain a feeling when it couldn't be justified.

For a moment none of them spoke, as Cissnei watched the blonde carefully and Reno waited for more of a reason to be given.

"Where … where was I?" Cloud finally managed to ask, his voice cracking slightly as he spoke. "When you … when you found me?"

Neither Turk failed to miss how the cadet's tone now sounded ashamed, how the slight quiver in his words revealed uncertainty in both himself and what he was currently feeling.

"It's not far from here." The red head offered, his feet moving him to stand beside the blonde. "About thirty yards ahead and then down towards the back."

"Oh, ok. Thanks. I ... I just … wanted to know. You know?"

Reno did, in his own way, and so did Cissnei. Yet even with this insight and understanding both were still curious why Cloud had felt the need to come back here, why he felt an almost instinctive need to return to the last place he'd broken down so badly.

"You want to go there?"

Cloud shock his head violently, his golden spikes swaying in all directions as he showed without words that he didn't want to go there, that he didn't actually want to see the latest place where he'd spilt his own blood again by nearly giving up.

"It's almost time to go meet Zack." Cissnei pointed out, her words drawing wide ocean blue eyes towards her instantly, the sea of emotions swimming within them made somehow worse by the gloss of tears she could see shimmering on their surface.

"I'm … scared." Cloud admitted softly, his voice barley audible even as it tried to explain what he was suddenly feeling. "I'm scared he'll … that he won't want to see me ... like this, after what I did."

"Hey, where's this coming from?" Reno was quick to ask, his hand now reaching out to reassuringly squeeze the cadet's shoulder. "You've spoken to him about what happened and he didn't get angry. Hell, he's probably driving Angeal nuts trying to get back here to see you and make sure you're ok."

"Really?"

Sweet Gaia, was Cloud really that insecure. His bottom lip trembling as he choked out the word and a row of small white teeth quickly biting down on it in some futile attempt to hold back the emotions which were clearly starting to consume him.

"Cloud, Zack loves you." Cissnei replied immediately, her arms not even hesitating as they wrapped around the cadet's slender form and drew it in closer against her own. A fine tremor now more than noticeable in his supple body as she tried to sooth and comfort as best she could. "Why would you suddenly think he doesn't?" She asked, desperate to know where such upsetting thoughts had come from after their wonderful morning.

"So many mistakes, I've made so many Gaia damned mistakes."

If the faintly spoken curse hadn't been enough to shock the Turks then the fierceness of the blonde's tone was, the obvious self-centred rage and self-loathing all to clear to hear in his voice.

"But you're not anymore, alright." Reno cut in before the brunette could, his words being ones she'd also intended to use. "You've been talking to us, opening up about stuff, and letting us in. That's not making mistakes Cloud."

"But I still ended up running again, didn't I? I still found myself doubting and needing to escape?"

"But this time you didn't run alone Blondie and that counts for something." The red head replied, a soft supportive hum coming from Cissnei as she let the other Turk speak for both of them now. Her efforts going into calming the trembling form in her arms and helping it find some control over itself where they stood.

"But I started to think that … that Zack didn't care. I started to question his feelings again when I shouldn't have."

"Why?"

It was a simple question and once that deserved an answer. Except, now, it appeared as if the reason he had wasn't good enough, his deepest darkest fears being foolish and ridiculous considering everything else that had happened over the past several months.

"Gaia, I'm such an idiot." Cloud berated himself, his lithe form easily slipping free from the brunette's comforting hold as he took a few steps away from them to find a space of his own. Her arms having never really held him that firmly in place against her, understanding that should he want to pull away the feeling of confinement would only make him react badly.

"Why?" Reno repeated softly, knowing that right now the cadet needed to talk to someone even if he hadn't realised it himself yet.

"In his message, he didn't say he missed me. I know. It's pathetic, right?" The blonde scoffed, or more like choked out, a crystal like bead finally breaking free and slipping silently down his cheek. "I mean come on, it's not like he can say it on a message like that and I get that. It's … it's just …"

"He didn't even hint at it." Cissnei guessed, her tender smile helping to ease the ache in his heart when he saw in her warm hazel coloured eyes that she understood and was not judging him on it. "And no, it's not pathetic." She added quickly, her smile softening to show that what she said was the truth. "Tseng made his message out to be something important, something special, but it wasn't what you were expecting. What you were hoping for. It's alright to feel hurt when something like that disappoints you, when something you need to hear isn't said."

"Really?"

This time when Cloud asked there was something different in his voice, a sense of relief and hope that he wasn't a completely hopeless cause for acting or feeling this way. And yes, what the brunette said made sense, so much sense. It was true, it had been upsetting to not receive something more meaningful from the soldier. However much sense it made for them to be discrete. And surely if Cissnei and Reno understood the situation then it was alright to feel this way, it was alright to feel cheated in some way by Zack's lack of words.

"Come on." Reno encouraged lightly, his arm once again finding a place around the blonde's shoulders and pulling him back along the path they had come. "We've got a date with a soldier and a lecture to give him about the right way, and the wrong way, to send a love letter."

Cloud couldn't help but choke on a small laugh at that, the idea of the two Turk's giving the soldier a lesson on how to correctly woe his boyfriend with hidden words and meanings making a watery smile form on his soft pink lips. The sound was more than welcomed by the pair and within seconds each had an arm wrapped around his body in some way, his supple form wedged safely between them as they took a leisurely stroll towards the transport bays and hopefully towards a waiting soldier recently returned from his mission.

"Oh shit … I mean shoot." Cloud quickly corrected, his damp cheeks suddenly warming a little at the slip. "I need to find my bag." He informed them awkwardly, the silver tracks no longer visible as he wiped them away and began to look around to get his bearings.

"Your bag?"" Reno asked in confusion. After all, the cadet hadn't been carrying a bag with him when they'd left the Turk building.

"Yea, my school bag. I kind of tossed it when I ran that night. Gaia, it must still be in the bushes where I threw it."

Reno couldn't help it, he laughed. The mixed look of embarrassment and guilt now visible on the blonde's face making it hard to control himself.

"You seriously tossed your bag and only now think about it?" He choked out between chuckle filled breaths. "It's been there for two days, at least. Hell, it might not even been there at this point."

"But my history text book's in it and the essay I was working on."

That little worried pout was just too cute for words and the red head found himself still on the verge of laughter again, even as the sight calmed him somewhat.

"Come on." He sighed, indicating for Cloud to lead the way once more. "Let's go see if it's still there."

A moment later and Cloud had them moving at a steady pace across the compound once more, his relaxed strides no longer filled with a desperate need to reach some unknown destination but instead paced with a purpose. Quickly they passed down the paths he'd followed that night, almost accurately back-tracking along the route he'd taken until they reached the exit he'd used to escape the main building.

It was there amongst the bushes that they found the blonde's bag, the outside a little dirtied from where it had been tossed and landed amongst the mud but on the whole mostly undamaged. Cloud himself was just relieved to find it and quickly slipped the strap over his shoulder so he could carry it more comfortably; his relieved smile drawing slightly amused ones from the pair beside him even as both worried over how such a simple security breach had once again been allowed to happen. It certainly wasn't going to sit well with Tseng that an unidentifiable bag had been lying in the bushes for over twenty-four hours and no one had found it.

Cringing at the thought of having to report the massive slip-up to the head Turk both suited individuals decided to push that issue to the side for a little while, their thoughts once more focusing on getting Cloud safely to the transport bays and back into Zack's arms as quickly as possible. Neither wanting to worry the cadet over what they both knew was a serious issue, both knowing that tomorrows task would be to find out who was responsible for patrolling this area and why they'd failed to sport such a potential threat during their sweep.

"Come on Blondie. Lets not keep lover-boy waiting." Reno joked lightly, his playful tone making the cadet blush a wonderful shade of pink even as he smiled bashfully at what had been said.

"Jerk." Cloud replied softly, his attempt to keep the gentle banter going making both red head and brunette smile at him in turn.

"Yea, but you wouldn't have me any other way." He retorted with a chuckle, his words earning him a small snort from the blonde and a roll of hazel coloured eyes from the woman beside him.

A moment later and they were off again, their well-trained bodies moving effortlessly and with a well-practiced stealth as all three moved like shadows towards their destination and towards the soldier who would be waiting for them.