Title: Tampon, a South Park fanfic

Summary: "Wendy, if tampons hurts, what is sex going to be like!?" I could never follow Bebe's train of thought, but this has got to be the best one yet.

Author's thingy: I wrote this while I was supposed to be doing classwork. This is so much better though, isn't it? :

Warning: Lady business.

--

"You have your period?" I asked upon looking at looking at my surprisingly happy best friend's calender. Just like every Friday night, we were having our weekly sleepover, and this time, it was at Bebe's house. It was now nine o'clock, which meant beauty sleep for Carla-also known as Mrs. Stevens-so we would just hang out in Bebe's room until she fell asleep.

I was sitting contently at her computer desk while she stared narcissisticly into her vanity mirror, a small smile playing her features when I'd noticed the Cocoa Cat calender stuck to her wall with but a single pin. Written on the top in bold letters read 'September,' and on the bottom, all the boxes up to the 14th were crossed out, which was today. A little red dot was marked under Friday, and under it in little tiny letters read 'period.'

"Yeah," She replied with a small nod, teasing her hair in the mirror, "It sucks because I have to use tamps instead of pads 'cause if gets so heavy..." I pursed my lips slightly.

"Doesn't that hurt?" I asked with a raise of a thin, black brow.

"Well, only if you have to use the Super Plus ones like me." I nodded and went back to organizing her things. It bothered me when anything is in dissary or out of order in any way, shape or form; hence why all my friends lockers are so clean.

"Oh my gosh! Wendy, I just realized something!" Bebe piped up suddenly after a few minutes had gone by.

"What?" I asked, looking up from what I was doing to give her a questioning look.

"If tampons hurt, what is sex going to be like!?"

My eyes went wide for a minute, thinking about what the blonde had just said before I burst out laughing, but she remained with a serious expression.

"No, really! Tampons hurt! Like a bitch! I mean, if that's the case, I want a guy with a small thing!" I only chuckled more at her childish usage of the word 'thing.' "And I know Clyde's isn't all that small...Seriously, have you seen his bulge!?" Meanwhile, I continued laughing so hard I was sure I would bust a gut, but by the look on her face, I could tell she was still being dead serious. And that, in all honesty, only made it funnier.

Finally, my laughter died down enough for me to make coherent speech. "You should get an Asian guy then," I said in between small laughs. ()

She paused for a moment, a contemplative look on her face. "I-...I don't get it. Why would I do that?" She said finally, and the laughter just started up again in full force.

Blonde moments were most frequent in the life of Bebe Stevens, but this had to be the best one yet because I couldn't stop laughing long enough to explain to her the Asian stereotype.

"I'm confused..." She muttered, still giving me that perplexed look.

God, Bebe could be so stupid at times...But it was times like these that she would make me laugh so hard without even trying that made me forget all my problems in life. And that, was among many of the reasons why I loved her.

Why she was my Best Bitch Forever.

--

Hah, Stan and Kyle have Super Best Friends, and Bebe and Wendy have Best Bitches forever. :D

I have NOTHING against Asians. Build a bridge and get over it.