Name: Baikokudo
Rating: R (for violence, blood and a bit of language)
Couple: 2+3
Archive: Nikki's Realm: http://www.geocities.com/mageofthewinds/
Author: Nataku's Child
Genre: AU/Fantasy, Drama, Romance, Deathfic.

Warning: This has blood, grossness, violence, death and so forth. Do not flame me because because I'm warning you now! Any flames will be glared at and then promptly ignored.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or it's characters. Listen to Petie the "Don't Sue People Panda" and don't sue me! It would make Petie a sad panda...I also don't own the panda -_- that's from South Park.

If you're still there, thank you.

Baikokudo

~I~ Chapter One ~I~

I sat at a roughly made table –and when I say roughly, I mean a few planks of wood on some rocks- poking at the more then a little rancid meat of an unknown animal, the species was probably better left not thought about.

My name is Trowa Barton. I'm one of the many soldiers waiting for the battle about to take place less then a mile from where I ate. I'd sworn my life to my country, just for it to be taken over by a man who only wanted more power. But I didn't let it bother me, this was my job, something I'd always done and never really thought to do otherwise.

I always prefer to be alone, maybe that's why he singled me out, whatever the reason, that's when I met the boy known as Duo Maxwell.

He walked over to my "table" and sat down, carrying his own plate of "food". He smiled at me, his violet eyes dancing in the dim light. It was getting colder; our evening meal was eaten in the half dark of twilight.

I watched him, in a way, my hair shielding my eyes so he couldn't see me. He speared a piece of meat with his knife, turned it over and sniffed it. He shrugged and stuck it in his mouth, chewing with one eye closed in thought.

"Wild Dog," he said after a moment. I looked up, giving up my veil of hair to look him in the eye. "Or maybe wolf, it's hard to tell the difference sometimes," he went on, grinning at his plate before stabbing another piece.

I shook my head and looked down to my plate. "It's dog," I say softly. "The texture is definitely dog." So much for not thinking about it.

I could see him frown and take another bite, chewing slowly. He swallowed and smiled. "I think you're right," he went back to his food. "You know your 'poor man's game'. Been a soldier long?"

"You could say that," I answered.

He looked at me, his head tipped slightly. He reached over and took my chin in his hand. Tipping my face up, he traced a battle scar that ran across my left cheek. The gentle touch sent not unpleasant shivers up my neck. I mentally shook it off and shoved it to the back of my mind.

He smiled and withdrew his hand. "A regular veteran." he was silent for a while. "This is my first actual battle," he said quietly. "Sure, I'd been in small scuffles, but this..." he looked around the rest of the mess tent. Men were talking loudly, boasting and telling jokes that would make even the most seasoned of tavern women blush. I'd grown up in places like that, learned all I knew from men like those. "Never anything this big," he finished.

He looked off, his eyes distant and clouded. He was just a boy, no older then sixteen to my nineteen years, but his eyes...they were much older, sad and distant at times. He shook his head and the youthful sparkle returned.

He laughed lightly and stuck out his hand. "I almost forgot! I'm Duo, Duo Maxwell."

I shook the outstretched hand. "Trowa Barton."

"Trowa Barton," he echoed. He smiled. "Well Tro', ya ready for the big rumble?"

I had never been called anything so friendly before, I hadn't even been talked to very much, only when given orders or yelled at when I did something wrong...or when they just felt like yelling. My first thought was to correct him, I was his elder and in a higher rank, he should treat me with more respect then that. But I didn't. The name touched something in my heart. I had missed my childhood, never had any friends. It was silly, but I wanted him to call me Tro', I wanted to please this boy, who acted so casual when he was about to face death.

"I suppose," I answered. I never had to carry on a conversation before.

Duo smiled though. "I'm a little nervous, I'm not used to this," he waved his knife, gesturing to the men. "Fighting in an army and all." I was long finished with my food, so was he, but neither of us made a move to get up. "I'll probably get myself killed in first few minutes," he laughed.

I frowned. How could a boy so young, laugh so openly at death? Most of the men there would die, and we knew it, but he didn't seem afraid.

Duo looked down at his plate. "Will they forgive me Tro'?" he said softly.

I looked up at him. "What?"

He shook his head. "Nothing." he picked up his plate and walked away.

~II~ Chapter Two ~II~

The orders came in that night: The enemy was on the move. We would battle come sunrise. The men were ordered to sleep well, in the morning we would fight for our king, and most likely, -though the captain didn't say so- die for him.

Duo sat across from me again at our morning meal. He was silent this time, he didn't even nod a good morning. His words stuck in my mind: "Will they forgive me?" They seemed to say much more then I originally thought.

I noticed him picking at his food, moving the runny porridge from one side of the bowl to the other then back again.

"You should eat," I said, taking a bite of my own and trying to swallow the bland almost-substance. "You will need your strength."

He nodded and spooned some into his mouth, only to return to playing with it again. He was looking at the table, though I doubt he could see it. I was halfway through with my breakfast when he sighed.

"What are we fighting for?" he asked.

"Orders are that we're to take over this area first before moving on to the larger cities."

"Why?" he asked.

"Because Lord Treize wants this land for our people." It was what we had been told, I wondered why he didn't know.

"Are his people starving?" he asked. I didn't understand why he said "his" instead of "our". "Did they take this land from him? Did they ever threaten his country?"

"No," I answered, still disturbed by his choice of words.

He stood up and walked away, not saying anything more.

~III~ Chapter Three ~III~

I stood in a line. The sun was slowly rising but the day was cold and overcast. The grass we stood on was still wet with dew.

Hundreds of armed men stood proudly, listening to orders. The enemy army was slightly larger, but weaker. They were poorly armed and trained, being so far from their cities, if you could call them that.

They were savage, everyone knew that, they were anarchists, all of them. The thought of no ruler scared most of us, it was too...different. Treize, our King, thought them weak and powerless with no overlord, so this was his first target after becoming King. I'd fought them before, in petty raids and scuffles along the border. Our King was a fool.

"...You will take this land!" The captain shouted to the soldiers. "For your country! And your King!"

I was disgusted. I'd sworn my life to my country, and therefore, was obliged to serve our new king, but it I hated to serve such a vile man. Still, I felt nothing in killing these men, they were savages, they'd kill their own mothers without a second thought, everyone knew that.

I looked around, tired of the captain's speech. I caught site of Duo, he was far off, listening intently to what his leader had to say. It struck me odd, he didn't seem so interested before. Duo was armed with a short sword in his right hand and a dagger in his left. Even from a distance I could tell that they were well crafted, the dagger even seemed ornamental. It was odd, that a boy so young would be armed so well.

The captain finished and there was a loud cheer from the other soldiers. They obviously didn't share my opinion, or didn't want anyone to know they did.

The captain shouted back and rode forward on his steed, leading the shouting warriors into battle. I followed, long sword ready for attack. We held ready on top of a hill. Below, our enemy waited patiently. The numbers struck fear in some of the men around me, their shouts quieting slightly. There were many, but most of them were armed with pitchforks or staffs, and if they were lucky, a poorly made sword.

With a shout from the leaders we charged, pouring down the hill. The rest was mostly a blur, a cold wave of calm washed over me and I fought, not even noticing if I was hurt or tired. Somehow, out of the numb feeling, I noticed a familiar voice shout. Turning, I saw Duo fighting his way towards me. My opponent took advantage of my distraction and gave me a gash on my right arm. Without a second thought I switched hands a stabbed the man in the throat.

The dead man slid from my sword as Duo finally made it to me. Duo smiled, blood running down a gash on his cheek.

"I was right," he shouted. "A regular veteran."

"Pay attention or you're going to get yourself killed," I yelled back.

He laughed but concentrated on the battle again. We fought side by side for God knows how long. Duo fought well, he was quicker then most of the men, -and women, because to my horror they were there too- and he didn't seem to be tiring.

I was locked hilt to hilt with a man, his breath reeking and his hair matted with dirt, when Duo faltered. I quickly disposed of the man and turned to see what was wrong. Duo had stopped fighting, he stood across from an enemy warrior, they were staring at each other. His opponent was a girl, she didn't look much older then Duo himself, her blue-black hair was cut short and her blue eyes were wide with shock. To my surprise she was armed well, her short sword wasn't decorative but it was well made and sturdy.

She was looking Duo over. I was stuck, the other men crowding around me and asking what was wrong. I ignored them and watched, unable to move for some reason. Finally the girl seemed to snap out of her trance and she spat.

"Traitor!" She screamed.

She lunged forward. I didn't move in time, I knew what she had done, and I knew it was too late for Duo to dodge or block. It happened so quickly, one moment Duo was staring at the girl in shock, the next he was on his knees, blood pouring from his side as she pulled her sword from his stomach.

I ran over quickly, my whole body shaking. The boy, the beautiful, smiling, friendly boy I had talked to only twice, was on his knees, staring into nothing, clutching his wound.

I slid half of the way on my knees coming to a stop in front of him. I caught him as he slumped forward, his face colorless and his skin already cold from blood loss on my cheek.

"Hold on," I whispered.

I picked him up and found a younger man. People were fighting and dieing around me, but all that mattered was the violet-eyed boy who had shown me kindness, if only for that short time. I called to the man, handing Duo to him I told him to take Duo to the healers. The young man hesitated and I shouted at him, finally he nodded and took off towards our camp.

Duo taken care of, I turned back to the battle. The girl, the one that had stabbed Duo, had run off. My mind went blank, a pure white rage burned in my heart and I killed. I hacked my way through the opposing army, searching for the cold little bitch that...no, Duo wasn't dead yet, he had to live, he was strong, he would live through it.

But my body was detached...Nothing mattered...Duo could die...

I had to find her.

He didn't want to fight, I told myself. He didn't see the point in this battle, but he fought anyway. Why? She called him "traitor" ...I just didn't understand.

*He called me Tro',* I thought. *He touched my face, when was the last time someone made eye contact let alone shake my hand?  That look in his eye, the aged look, what did that to him? Who did that to him? He'll die. He'll die with empty eyes...*

I screamed in rage, the people around me faltered and I struck, slicing the stomach of the woman in front of me.

Duo was dying, if not dead already, and it was their fault, they would pay...

~IV~ Chapter Four ~IV~

I stumbled into camp. My side was burning in pain, my right arm felt useless and I felt faint from losing so much blood. But still I walked, I needed to know, I needed to see him.

I stepped into the healer's tent, men's screams and cries filled the small area and the stench of blood and vomit was overwhelming. I walked between the rows of beds, or rather the rows of thin blankets that were placed over the hard ground.

I found him towards the back. They had bandaged his wound, but blood was seeping through, and no one had come to change it. Duo looked terrible, he was pale and sweating, his eyes and lips were squeezed tight against the pain.

I swallowed and kneeled beside him. "Duo?"

His eyes cracked open. When he recognized me, he smiled. There was blood on his teeth. "Hey Tro'! How'd we do?"

"The enemy retreated. For now, we've won," I answered.

Duo nodded slightly.

"How are you?" I asked.

He laughed bitterly. "Dying, and you?"

I frowned and shook my head, ready to protest.

"No," he stopped me. "I'm dyin' and there ain't nothin' we can do about it. Nope, I'm bound for the fire pit."

"Duo..."

"I'm going to hell Trowa," he said seriously, looking me in the eye. "I'm a traitor, you heard Hilde." Duo turned his head and closed his eyes.

He can't sleep! I thought franticly. I grabbed his hand, squeezing gently. He's so cold... I blinked. There was something hard underneath his hand.

"What is this?" I asked, pulling his hand away. Under it, lay the ornate dagger he had fought with.

Duo opened his eyes, and smiled. "Me an' Hil' got it on our first raid together...kept it ever since..."

I squeezed his hand lightly. "Who are you?"

Duo's smile faltered. "Trowa..."

"Tell me about it."

He sighed. "I'm a native of this land," he began. "My parents died when I was young, five or so. I joined a kid's gang soon after, you know: petty theft, picking pockets, that sorta thing."

He paused. When he spoke again his voice was harsh.

"Anyway, one day there was a plague in the little hideout we had, every kid there died...except me. After that I moved out on my own. That's when I met Hilde, we became partners in business you could say. Best friends, couldn't split us up if you tried. But then some old lady took Hilde in, turns out she trained female warriors. I had nowhere to go...I ended up in a run down old church, but then..." There was a long pause. Duo had lost a lot of blood, and it was still seeping through the bandage. "...That burned down. They said it was a fire but...anyway, the people of the town I lived in decided I was cursed, they said I would bring death to anyone who came near me...they cast me out."

My heart burned with rage. I felt the need to kill something, anything. But I couldn't leave him. I squeezed his hand tighter. He smiled shakily and continued.

"That's why I joined this fight," he said. "I wanted to show them, get back at them for what they did to me...but I'm a traitor, I fought against my own people...I deserve...to die...like this." His breathing was raged and he had to catch it many times when he was speaking.

My heart clenched. There were tears in Duo's beautiful eyes, they should have never been so sad, they never should have looked so cold...He was too young damn it!

Duo tensed up, he clenched my hand as hard as he could, which wasn't much. "Hilde!" he said. "The girl that stabbed me, you didn't kill her did you?"

I clenched my other hand in to a fist. "No," I said. "But I swear, I'll hunt her down-"

"Don't!" Duo yelled with as much force as he could muster.

I frowned. "Why? I'll kill her for-"

"No," Duo said firmly, squeezing my hand for emphasis. "You can't kill her, she did what I would have done in her place. Don't blame her, I was her best friend, and...even though the village cast me out...she stuck up for me...and now...Just promise me you wont hurt her."

"Duo..."

"Promise me!"

I nodded. "I promise"

Duo rested back down, he looked worn, tired and old for his age.

"You're not going to hell Duo," I said.

He looked up.

I grabbed his hand in both of mine. "You are not going to hell Duo," I repeated.

He nodded. "Thanks Tro'."

There it was again, Tro'.

Duo sighed. "Well, I guess this is it."

I squeezed his hand, unable to think of something to say.

"Do me a favor Tro'?"

I nodded. "Anything."

He looked down. "I know I'm young and all...and you're probably not even...I've never kissed anyone before..." he looked up at me, embarrassed but hopeful.

I leaned down, gingerly tipping his head up. His eyes closed. Our lips meet, I could taste his blood and it made me sick to think his first kiss would be spoiled this way...his last kiss...

I kept it chaste, a simple brush, I didn't want to hurt him anymore then he hurt already.

"Thanks Trowa," he said when I pulled away, he was smiling brighter then I'd seen all day.

It was only for a moment. He winced suddenly and held my hands tighter, a fresh sweat broke out on his forehead and he closed his eyes. Tears were streaming down his face. His eyes snapped open after a moment of silent screams. He looked up to the sky, or where it would have been had the tent not been there.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry."

"Duo!"

He kept staring at the ceiling, shaking his head and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over.

I'm not ashamed to say I panicked. Doing the only thing that came to mind, I kissed him again. At first he still stared at the ceiling but eventually he calmed down, relaxing against my touch. Bracing myself I probed his lips with my tongue. He pulled back for a moment, and I was afraid that I'd done wrong, but after that moment he parted his lips. I kissed him softly, ignoring the taste of blood and his lack of energy in responding. After a few moments, I pulled away.

Duo's eyes were on me, looking hopeful. He couldn't die like this. He needed something more. The kiss hadn't been enough.

I took his hand, placing his bare skin on the scar at my cheek. Tears fell from my eyes, streaking across the dried blood staining his hand.

"Thank you," I said. "You saved me."

Tears were still streaming down his face, making muddy puddles on few blankets that made his bed. Somehow, I think he understood. His eyes showed something near relief for a brief moment...

And then it was gone.

His eyes unfocused and I was the only thing keeping his hand on my cheek. Duo Maxwell was gone.

My grip tightened on his lifeless hand. The tears fell faster, running over his fingers and into his palm, pooling and mixing with the blood and dirt that covered it. I took his hand away, kissing the back lightly before placing it on his chest.

My hand shook as I reached over and closed his eyes, shutting the darkened windows to a soul that was no longer there.

~V~ Chapter Five ~V~

I stood on a small hill, the wind blowing across my face and pulling at the shirt hanging loosely on my shoulders. I stood at a grave, a small stone and an ornately fashioned dagger being its markers. I was the one who buried him; I wouldn't let anyone else do it.

That's when I ran away, so to speak.

Orders had come the day after Duo died. On a whim, the king had decided to give up on expanding this part of the kingdom and was going to focus his army elsewhere, we were to move out the next day. All those people died for him, and the king decided that he'd rather not have this bit of land. It was the last I could take. After Duo had died, and even before that, when I first met him, I begun to look at life differently. Now, the thought of killing again, slaughtering innocents for someone I hated, made me sick, I just couldn't do it anymore.

So I left. I ran from them, escaped the life I had lived for as long as I cared to remember.

I picked up the small bundle that rested on the grass. It was all I had. I had left my armor and most of my weapons with the army, taking only the dagger at my hip and a small amount of food. I looked back to the dagger in the ground, polished until the jewels on the hilt glittered in the early morning light. All the blood and dirt was gone, leaving nothing but it's beauty. I wished I could have done the same for Duo, but I had been too late.

I brought my fingers to my lips; kissing them gently and holding them out before letting my hand fall back to my side.

Silently, my tears long before been shed, I walked down the hill.

The sun was setting when I came across a small house. It looked run-down, but alive. So we hadn't killed everyone after all. As I walked closer, a woman came to the door. She held her slightly bulging stomach with one hand, and a few small children had gathered around her skirt, peering at me from behind the folds.

"Welcome," she called out, as I got closer. Her soft voice was warm and I could tell she really meant what she said. "Are you a traveler?"

I nodded. "I was hopping to find some shelter," I say.

She smiled and stepped aside, gesturing inside. "We always have room." She said.

~*~ Epilogue ~*~

I've stayed with the Winner family from then on. I learned that Treize's army killed Mrs. Winner's husband. She said that he, like most of the people from the village near by, had fought to protect their home and beliefs. They had been peaceful, all living by the rules of mankind and morals, not by those written by a man who didn't know them. While he died an honorable death, he had left her pregnant with a house full of girls and a small farm to take care of.

I moved in and worked there as a sort of handy man, doing small things for her, sometimes helping with the children, in exchange for a small bed in the only empty room. I began to understand their way of life, and that they were good people, even if they thought differently. My life there has been a happy one. While I still miss Duo, he left me with the greatest lesson I have ever learned: the smallest kindness can change someone's life. The memory of our short time together will stay with me until the day I die, and I'm a better person because of it. Duo Maxwell did not go to hell, he was the one who saved me from mine.

I never told Mrs. Winner where I came from, and she never asked. I hope, that helping her and her family will help me pay back some of the pain I had caused others...

And maybe, it's a way to pay Duo back and put a small part of him to rest.

"Uncle Trowa?"

Called from my thoughts, I turn around and look down at the small golden head looking up at me. I smile. "What are you doing here Quatre?" I ask, picking him up and putting him on my shoulders.

"Momma told me to get you," he says, giggling when I bounce him a little. "Supper's ready."

"Alright then, we better get going, right little one?"

The youngest Winner squeezed my hands. "Right!"

I take one last look at the horizon. I'm too far away to see it, but I know that Duo's small hill is out that way. I smile softly and turn away, making my way to the small house that has become my home.

I am happy here, but I still miss Duo, even now...

The End.

Hi ^_^
This is a short story that wouldn't leave me alone so I wrote it down a while back. I found it a lil' bit ago. I had stopped it mid-sentence! So I finished it ^_^ I'm rather proud of it, though it's a bit on the bloody-gory-sick side. I hope you liked it, despite its rough edges. Tell me what ya think ^_^
Nikki :-P