Shadow on the Moon

Chapter 10: Epiphany

It was a long three days of travel and two of the siblings were exhausted and looking forward to a good meal and a warm bed. The third however was silent the entire time, he was consumed with thoughts that had plagued his mind and only seemed to grow as konoha approached ahead of them. Those words echoed through his mind over and over again... when she betrays you. Of course there was a small voice in the back of Gaara's mind that knew he was being paranoid for no reason.

When this trip started he wasn't entirely convinced that he was making the right choice to leave Suna, but now he was sure that he needed to be here. Although he still wasn't entirely sure why he needed to be. He just had a feeling that this was important. And council member Airi's voice just played on repeat throughout the trip only increasing his resolve that something terrible was about to happen.

Finally the gates appeared in the distance as they leaped through the trees with the ease of high ranking ninjas. Within a minute they three of them stopped at the gate and was greeted with the guards looking awfully surprised to see the Kazekage and siblings in tow.

"Gaara-sama?" The guard with spiky hair couldn't hide his confusion.

"What an unexpected surprise!" The other with his hair covering his eye tried to cover for him. He shot the other guard a glare for a second but quickly recovered with a smile. "What brings you here to Konoha?"

"I've come to visit someone." Was all he said and then walked away from the gate. Kankuro followed in his footsteps while Temari stayed behind to show the two guards the proper paperwork and explain the situation.

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Gaara stood in the Hokage's office very annoyed. Tsunade was rubbing her temples on her forehead to try and soothe away and forming headache, to no avail. Gaara was just as equally upset that he was standing in this office as she was for him being here.

"You are the leader of your village, you can't just leave whenever you feel like it." The hokage explained bluntly. "I know you are concerned about Katsura but she is surrounded by her friends, family, and fellow nin. I assure you that she is safe, no matter what you may think."

Gaara didn't respond. He was still annoyed when the guard insisted that he come to Tsunade's office, and he was even more annoyed that when he refused the Hokage herself literally dragged him to her office. "I repeat, you are the leader of your village, you can't just leave it unattended." She leaned back in her chair and grabbed her small bottle of saki and took a sip.

"The council has agreed to continue to run the village in my absence. I assure you Tsunade-sama that this will be a short trip." The two siblings were a bit surprised at how calm and cooly Gaara was able to respond.

"It doesn't matter how short the trip is, your village needs you. Not just to run things and do boring paperwork, but they need you as protection."

Gaara paused. He hadn't thought about it like that. He was slightly ashamed now that he left his village alone like that. He eventually nodded to the Hokage who just sighed. "Well as long as you are here, let me know if you need anything." She said and then returned to paperwork as the three siblings left her office. Gaara knew deep down that she was right, however he was already here so he might as well find Katsura.

The three of them headed to the inn that they were staying at during this trip. The first thing Temari did was insist on taking a bath, she decided to depart from the pair of boys. Although Kankuro did laugh about how she just wanted to smell nice for Shikamaru, this was met with a punch and her storming off. The brothers just looked at each other, Gaara was confused as to why Kankuro would continuously make these jokes knowing he was going to anger her and result in a being hit.

Gaara just started to walk away from the rooms that they were assigned and towards the door at the end of the hall. Kankuro jogged to keep up with his determined younger brother.

"Where are you going?" He had a big cheshire cat grin plastered on his face, "We just did a lot of traveling, don't you want to take a nap or something?"

"No, I'm going to find Katsura. When I know everything is okay then I'm going back to Suna."

The smile melted off the older brothers face instantly. "What do you mean you're leaving?"

"The Hokage was right. I am a leader and I need to be at my village. I cannot afford to be here for no reason." Gaara responded calming, Kankuro just sighed in defeat. With that statement the two brothers walked in silence around the village.

Many people greeted Gaara respectfully or smiled at him. This was something that he was unused to. People seemed to be more forgiving and accepting of him here. He thought this must have something to do with Naruto, he has worked hard to show them that just because there was a demon locked inside him doesn't mean he can't be a good person. Gaara thought back to his childhood. If he had been more determined like Naruto then everything could have been different. He could have moved past what happened and used the demon to his advantage.

Without even realizing where he was walking, Gaara stopped and looked at the field in front of him. Kankuro had apparently been talking the whole time but the were lost. Gaara could see the headstones stretching into the distance. He could also see the memorial stone not to far away. An idea popped into his head and he had to double check… just to be sure.

He walked over to the stone, Kankuro stopped talking and just stared a bit confused as to why they ended up here. The redhead just made his way over to the stone and scanned the names that were etched into it. He looked over the many names, some of them he recognized just from learning about the History of Konoha but most meant nothing to him. His eyes paused upon the name he was looking for. It was Jubei's.

It looked like the elements had started to take their toll on the engraving, he could see faint stains left behind from fingers gently brushing against it. He stared at that name, and it seemed like the anger started to rise up inside him. How could someone who has been gone for over 2 years and declared dead just simply return? It made no sense. He could feel like fire burn in the pit of his stomach, it was an old feeling he hadn't felt in a long time. This hate, this anger, this rage. He clenched his hands into fists, something was wrong here and he was determined to prove it.

During this time, he hadn't noticed the sand started to surround his feet. As his feeling started to get more intense with every passing second, the sand started to move; slowly at first but quickly increasing in speed. Kankuro had actually taken a couple steps back, concern written on his painted face. The kazekage didn't take notice and just continued to be overwhelmed by this emotion he was feeling. The sand was almost at a flurry by now, it was swirling around its user in a mad whirl wind of anger. Gaara could have sworn there was a deep chuckle that came from the back of his mind but it never repeated.

Just as quick as his fury rose, it subsided as soon as his eyes fell upon another name. He could see the name of Katsura's father etched only a few lines above the name he came to see. This hate and anger were washed out and replaced with shame and regret. The sand fell to the ground limply, almost as if it had never moved in the first place. The last time he was so consumed with anger, he used that anger to attack the village, Katsura's father had died during that time. For a brief moment he felt shame, it was his fault. Sure Baki may have actually been the one to kill him but Gaara was the weapon in the attack. He was so consumed by rage that he didn't care who died in the attack. This realization finally opened his eyes to the attack. Yes, he always knew it was his fault for the attack, but is always seemed to be random people. Now he realized exactly how much pain and destruction he caused. How could Katsura actually forgive him for what he did? How could he ever forgive himself?

Kankuro hesitantly took a few steps forward when the sand stopped moving. He placed a hand on his brother's shoulder, he tried to stop it from shaking but couldn't. It has been a long time since he had seen his younger brother act that way. The puppeteer just rested his hand on his younger brother's shoulder and waited. He didn't want to break the silence at this time. Normally he was a pain and wouldn't care about social niceties but this time it was different. The two waited in silence for about a half hour while Gaara regained his composure. The smaller of the two finally reached his hand up and placed it on his older brothers. Kankuro was a bit taken back, Gaara never should physical affection.

"Gaara, if you need to talk…" Kankuro started to say but stopped when the redhead dropped his hand and turned to look at him. Kankuro was worried, Gaara looked distressed.

"How… How could I have done this?" Gaara spoke quietly, his voice was just barely above a whisper.

"It's not your fault," Kankuro grabbed the younger by both should be forced him to make eye contact. "Listen to me, it wasn't your fault."

"So many died because of me though." Gaara couldn't help but vocalize his fears. "How can I protect the people I care for if this is the pain I caused? Maybe I can't." His own hands rose up to cover his heart, it was almost as if it were in pain itself. He could feel the walls starting to crumble in his own mind, the events he worked to block out. He was brought back to reality with a sharp slap across the face.

He blinked a few times, mainly in shock. Normally his sand would always protect and ensure that no one ever hit him. Without the demon however he had to physically control it, and he wasn't expecting the hit.

Kankuro wore a very serious expression, "Gaara, don't ever talk like that! You have changed since then, you are a completely different person. We need you, Kat needs you."

Gaara just stood in awe. The smallest hint of a smile slowly crept onto his face. He bowed his head slightly. That was exactly what he needed to hear. Yes he caused pain and destruction year ago, but he knew that he would never repeat that again. Right now he needed to protect his precious person.

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Wow, only 19 months between updates.

Sorry about the wait, I don't even know how many people even read this story anymore but I was recentlytransferring my stories from my old computer and I started to reread this story. I forgot how much I really liked it and I want to actually finish it. I'm going to condense it some so it may feel a bit more rushed but at least there will be a conclusion.