Nowhere to Turn

Character/Pairing Using Jazz/unnamedOC to set up for events that lead to eventual Jazz/Sideswipe (she's currently planned to only make this one brief appearance), plus other pairings to be implied. OCs to appear as necessary. Canon characters throughout (heavy on Lambos, Datsuns, a certain medic, and the Special Ops Trio)
Author's Note This could possibly be considered a slight AU, as Prime's unit isn't quite the normal one we see. As a matter of fact we're only going to get outside glimpses of Prime's unit. It's never seemed real clear in the cartoon, but I like to go by the idea that there used to be a heck of a lot more units than Prime's on Cybertron (a lot like we see in IDW-verse, with Prime being the 'Commander General') that were slowly wiped out by the Decepticons. The core group we know of in Prime's unit didn't start there.

This fic is promising to be rather sizeable. It's my attempt at doing a pairing 'right' (by actually starting at the beginning of the relationship, rather than in the middle, which is where I'm more comfortable). I'd been itching to write Jazz/Sideswipe for a while, and was ecstatic to be struck by this plot bunny.

Prologue

Warning This part contains some mechanical gore, don't think it's really gruesome, but it's there.

Originally this was written as a separate back story piece for the rest of the fic, but I felt that the actual first chapter started too sudden, and needed a prologue. I thought about doing a Sideswipe POV chapter, but that just revealed too much about his character. This however suited my need just fine.

Jazz used to consider her a friend.

Used to consider her a comrade-in-arms.

He'd never thought he'd be allowed to hold her in his arms. Watching her for so long, she seemed too fine for his soiled hands, so real and yet just beyond his touch. He'd never thought he could ever charm his way into her spark like she had wormed into his.

He fingered the secondary trigger at the small of her back, cradling her to his chest, heedless of the coolant spattered across her hourglass torso. Except that it was her coolant that covered his hands, and her coolant brightly pulsing from the slit in her neck.

After being together for so long, how could she do this to him? To the entire unit?

She stared at him, optics wide in shock, hands clenching weakly at the air. Coolant spurted from the panels that used to mount the barrels of her altmode; ripped off in a rage that had left the metal torn, and the wires shredded. It coated his hands, pooling about his feet.

He'd loved her from a distance for a vorn, savoring every glance she graced him, wallowing in every greeting she gave.

He'd never been so shy and Razoredge, his keen optics seeing the furtive glances Jazz threw her way, had asked him what the difference between her and every other bot who had caught his eye.

Jazz had no answer for him at that time.

He clutched her frame, unwilling to believe that she was dying in has arms. Unwilling to believe what had happened. Yet there was no denying the truth. Even when he looked away from her, trying to find somewhere that didn't remind him of the broken femme in his arms, the truth was smeared in bright blue streaks across the walls.

A shudder shook his plating, and tears rolled down his cheeks. Dental plates clenched back a glitching sob as he bowed over her.

Razoredge, always on the lookout for the well-being and happiness of his small team, assigned her to accompany him on what should have been a simple mission. Jazz wasn't exactly sure how he'd explained the need to the CMO, but it had done what the Special Ops commander had intended, even if not exactly in the manner he'd wanted.

Captured by Discordance, tortured and interrogated, they'd found one another in the terror of those that expected to die. In desperate hands and hot mouths that needed to find a moment of peace in the confines of an enemy stronghold.

It hadn't been enough. He hadn't been enough.

Trembling fingers stroked the edges of an open access panel, the cable within sparking from having been torn from its moorings.

Her mouth gaped with words that couldn't be pushed past her vocalizer. Those wires had also been neatly cut. He gently wiped off the energon that dribbled from the pool in her mouth, not wanting it to ignite along her severed power lines. Not wanting it to mar her beautiful face.

Jazz used to consider her a lover.

He didn't look up when another mech pounded into the bare room.

"Freeze, put your hands in-"

Silence, surprised and sudden. The blaster aimed toward the two Autobots on the floor wavered.

Jazz finally looked up when the last bit of light died within her eyes. His jaw still clenched, moist tears still wetting his cheek.

"Jazz?" A communication accompanied that single query, a call for backup. "Do you-? I detected…" Red Alert couldn't seem to get the words out. Finally the red and white mech straightened, composing himself. "I'm going to have to arrest you for the…" Keen optics took in the fluids smeared across the walls. "-the torture and murder of a fellow Autobot." The sharp gaze sought out an open panel on the wall, a broken cord still attached to it, then he glanced at the femme's access panel, shorting and sparking. "Pending further investigation."

Jazz wiped her name from his memory banks and he shuttered his optics, leaning his head back against the grief that seized his spark. "It ain't murder, if it's killin' an-" he choked on the word, his fuel tanks churning with the unfinished sentence. He resolutely pushed on. "-if it's an enemy."

Another glance from the broken cord to the sparking panel. "That will have to await Firestar's evaluation."

More feet pounded down the hall, only to grind to a halt just behind the new security officer.

"What happened here? Let me through!" A red femme forced her way to the forefront, helped along the way by a much larger red mech. She jerked to a stop in front of Jazz. Blue optics paled in shock, tracing the coolant that slowly ran down Jazz's hood. With a sharp rev of her engine, Firestar knelt and took the femme from Jazz's arms, and Jazz did not fight it.

He'd already lost her when he'd first come into the room.

Another, green striped in brown, followed at a measured pace, pulling Inferno back. Jazz couldn't meet Razoredge's gaze. He didn't want his commander's sympathy. He didn't want to see the accusation.

Red Alert glanced at Razoredge, his optics slipping to the silent form of Red Magnum, before moving forward to clamp a hand on Jazz's shoulder.

Razoredge silently contemplated Jazz, the medic's furious chatter a hollow echo in Jazz's audio receptors. They might have removed her from his hands, but he couldn't bear to tear his gaze away. Hoping that she would twitch, gives some sign that she still functioned.

"What did you do?" Razoredge snapped, shock shorting his vocalizer.

The words finally spurred Jazz to his feet, and he stumbled toward his friend, wrenching away from Red Alert's hand. He grabbed at Razoredge, aware that every gun was on him. He left blue streaks across the green armor, fingers digging into seams to hold him up. Razoredge lifted a hand, frown never leaving his face.

"She lied t' m-" Jazz halted himself. He wanted Razoredge, Red Magnum, Red Alert, all of them to understand, but he had to force the words out of his vocalizer. "She lied t' us. She lied t' everyone." He slid to his knees, gaze dropping to the ground, shuddering in wracking sobs.

His brow ridge furrowed against his wishes as he let Red Alert pull him to his feet and away from Razoredge. "She lied to me," he tried again, his voice small, hating the way it sounded.

Razoredge frowned, finally turning to Red Magnum. The Commander didn't say anything, his mask hiding his expression. His chin tucked down, and looked around the small room. "He's your mech," the large mech said simply, turning on his heel and striding out of the room.

Razoredge vented a sigh, looking back down at Jazz. He blinked slowly, optics shifting as he thought.

"Jazz," he finally said, his words slow and carefully considered. "We'll let you know the results when Firestar has them."

"I don' care!" Jazz spat back. He knew the truth already. He'd shouldn't have stumbled upon that file, never meant to find that hack. The same one that had apparently alarmed the security officer. He glared at Razoredge, systems heated and his optics glitched in rage. "She's gone! She's dead!" he all but screamed at Razoredge, forcing the officer back a step, and as suddenly as it struck him, it vanished and he went limp. "What good is bein' told what I already know gonna do me?

The officer's frown deepened, and he tilted his head. "I understand. We'll give you some time first." He nodded at Red Alert, stepping over to kneel next to Firestar.

Red Alert looked the saboteur over, hand still on his shoulder. "If you come quietly, I won't cuff you."

"I don' care." What had he to care for anymore? Broken, his steps echoing in his audio receptors, he followed Red Alert's guiding hand through the crowd at the entrance.

He'd never felt so betrayed.

The energon bars of his cell reflected off his white plating, casting it into pink hues. His chronometer kept glitching as he allowed himself to be consumed by his overwhelming grief. Coolant still decorated his frame, the cloth offered by Red Alert discarded unused on the bunk next to him. He stared at his hands, the last remainder of a femme he'd given all he had to. Given everything and had it all dashed upon the streets before it had even started.

A shadow fell over him, but he didn't have to look up to see who it was.

"Jazz, could I talk to you?"

"Ain't ever stopped ya before, yer the officer after all," he forced out a soft chuckle to take the sting out of his words. Even in his despair he began assembling his mask.

The hum of the bars died, and Razoredge stepped in, not activating the cell again as he sat down next to Jazz. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs, and Jazz felt the weight of his gaze.

"I wish you'd waited for backup."

Jazz tilted a scowl at Razoredge, but didn't say anything, his gaze never leaving his blue hands.

"As it is, we didn't have the opportunity to speak with her and clarify what might have been going through her spark." Razoredge paused, and Jazz detected the slightest shift in his commander's posture. Another few astroseconds and Razoredge sighed. "Firestar found an anomaly within her processor."

Jazz snorted, unsurprised by the mech's 'revelation'. Jazz had pieced that together without a processor scan.

"Twi-"

"I don' wanna hear her name," Jazz finally spoke, his voice cutting through Razoredge.

The spy paused again, his optics flickering. "Did you notice anything anything odd about her behavior?"

Jazz choked back a sob, scraping his hands up the crest of his helm. "Only now that I think 'bout it."

"Did she tell you anything before…" Razoredge hesitated, but continued as though he hadn't halted. "Beforehand?"

Jazz'z fists clenched on his , his vocalizer tight against another sob that threatened to rack his frame. Razoredge's systems hummed impatiently. "I'm going t' kill him."

Razoredge stiffened, leaning away from Jazz, power humming through his optics in alarm. "Who?"

"Y'said 'Star found an anomaly, righ'?"

The spy nodded and his mouth pinched tighter. "She wouldn't give up. Red Magnum had to step in and demand she reach a conclusion. But, yes."

He couldn't help but to wince "Then it was Discordance. That slagging Pit-scum planted th' ideas in her head and made her do it." Anything would be better than to think she did it on her own.

"She said that? She and Discordance talked?"

Jazz glared at the other, his engine growling with restrained fury. "I didn't give her a chance t' talk." He hunched in on himself, remembering the terror that had twisted through as that light-hued mech had dragged her away, and she'd come back unscathed, but shaken, her optics pale, though he couldn't find a cause. "We never talked about it. I thought they did th' same things t' both'a us."

"I see." Razoredge picked up the cloth, tossing a few times before handing it over to Jazz. "Due to extenuating circumstances, you're not going to be charged. Do you still need time?"

"She was contacting the Cons?"

Razoredge pressed his lips together, his mouth thinning wordlessly.

"No, think I'm good now." Jazz wiped up the worst of the coolant, before he shoved himself to his feet, stepping out into the too bright hallway.

Razoredge seized Jazz's arm, turning the saboteur toward him. "There is a condition to your release."

Jazz sat back on his heels, frowning at the blank look on the spy's face. "Yeah?"

"You are accompanying me to medbay and you are going to allow Firestar to deepscan you. I'll have Starsaber verify the results." The bright-eyed hardness on his face conveyed his determination that the order would be followed regardless of Jazz's own objections. Daring Jazz to object.

Jazz stared at Razoredge, stunned. "Do wha'? That ain't nec-"

Razoredge snapped his head toward Jazz, brow ridge dropped in a scowl, and Jazz realized, too late, that it was the wrong thing to say.

It suddenly struck him that he really wasn't the only one to take this betrayal personally. She had been entrusted with the medics' safety on the battlefield. And she had betrayed that. Betrayed the friends and lovers of those medics.

"I guess it is…" Jazz shuddered at green fingers tightening on his arm, shock draining into his systems that he would be suspected of being influenced by the Cons.

He let Razoredge pull him toward the medbay, his gears wrenching with the weighty emotions of betrayal and grief. Discordance's light-hued face hovered before his mind's eyes, red optics burning into his processor.

That damned Decepticon would pay for meddling in the mind of the femme Jazz loved.