Sleep with werewolves, lap-dancing and Nelson
BPOV
I was sitting in the last row in the classroom. It was so boring. I didn't listen to the stuff the teacher said. I was passing notes with Emmett, Edward, Renesmee and Jake.
Emmett: Hey Renesmee! What's it like to sleep with a werewolf?
Renesmee: It's the best. If you want to try, I'll borrow Jacob.
Jacob: Ugh! I don't want to sleep with a Dracula!
Edward: You sleep with a Dracula all the time…
Bella: EDWARD!
Edward: What? It's true!
Bella: She's your daughter!
Emmett: It's still true.
Bella: Oh shut up Emmett!
Jacob: I don't sleep with a Dracula!
Emmett: You do.
Jacob: I don't
Emmett: You doooohohoo!
Renesmee: Awww…Shut UP you two!
Jacob: 'kay hun
Emmett: But you still do! 'grin'Bella: 'rolling eyes'
Suddenly Edward growls…Bella: What is it?Edward: Oh nothing. Our teacher just imagines you naked in this moment.
Emmett bursts into loud, loud laughters.
"Mr. Cullen, is there a problem?" the teacher asked him.
"Sorry sir." Jacob said. "He has just this handicap where you suddenly burst into laughters. You can't help it." He sniffed playfully.
Renesmee giggled quietly.
Emmett stopped laughing abruptly.
"Sorry sir." he said.
"No I'm sorry, Mr. Cullen. I didn't know…" the teacher stammered.
"Oh that's okay." Emmett said. "You couldn't know. I forgive you."
We all held back giggles. The teacher thanked Emmett and blushed. Then he turned around and started to talk about his stuff again.
Bella: You're a genius Jake. 'giggle'
Jacob: 'smug' I know…
Emmett: Does he imagine Bella totally naked?
Edward: Yes.
Emmett: Without any clothing?
Edward: YES EMMETT!!
Emmett: Really…
Edward: Yes Emmett and now please: CUT IT OUT!
Emmett: Okay, okay 'miffed'
Bella: What do I do in his imagination? 'curious'
Edward: 'sigh' You make a little lap-dance…'disgusted'
Bella: Now I'm miffed. I just thought about giving you a little lap-dance.
Edward: He's disgusting, not you're lap-dance. Why don't we try it this evening? Lap-dancing I mean.
Bella: Sure. 'wink'
Renesmee: MUM! DAD! Now I'm really disgusted.
Emmett: Oww!! I want to film you two!! Can I, Tinkerbell?
Bella: DID YOU JUST CALL ME TINKERBELL? PARIS HILTONSDOG?
Emmett: Yep.
Bella: Never say that to me again you bitch!
Emmett: 'miffed' You're a bitch yourself. 'sticking tongue out'
Edward: HEY!
Emmett: Sorry Eddie-Babe!Edward: Eddie-Babe??
Renesmee: Oh shut up you all!Emmett: 'grumble'
Renesmee: Emmett McCathy Cullen! SHUT UP!
Emmett: 'kay, 'kay…Jacob: Ha-Ha!!
Emmett: Hello Nelson.
Edward: Nelson?
Emmett: Aww…Don't you watch The Simpsons?
Bella: I luv them!
Emmett: Me too 'grin'
Bella: We're soul mates. We have to marry!
Emmett: Sorry but I'm married. What about just dirty, hard sex in a broom closet?
Bella: Okay. But don't tell Eddie-Babe! 'whisper'
Edward: HEY!
Bella: Ooops…Emmett: Bad luck…
Bella: We have to invent a secret language, so that he can't understand us. 'twisting evil mustache'
Emmett: Hahahaha how evil!