Not actually an update, just a re-edit so it's not so confusing to read!! Thanks to LawlietIsJustice for pointing out my terrible layout screw-up! It was late... My bad! Thanks to all who've reviewed so far!
Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. I really wish I did, but I don't.
Question?
"Light-kun?"
It took Light Yagami a few seconds to respond to his name being called. The other members of the Kira task force had long since retired to their rooms, leaving only himself and L… Ryuzaki… alone in the main office. For the past hour and a half, the only sounds Light had heard over the low drone of the computers and monitors were the occasional clink of the chain linking him to the young detective, and the obligatory chewing and slurping noises that so often accompanied L.
"…Yes?" Light frowned.
L slowly turned his chair to face Light, but said nothing. Light inwardly sighed. Damn Ryuzaki… Why did he always have to be such hard work?
"What?" Light prompted.
"Do you love me?"
Light felt his jaw drop slightly. That certainly wasn't what he had expected to hear. He looked his companion straight in the eye. Was this a test? A joke? No… L's expression, as always, was perfectly cool; his unblinking eyes showed no hint of any alternative intent. Then again, did they ever?
Not knowing what else to say, Light stuttered, "…Wh…? What kind of a question is that?"
"A fairly simple one," L said, matter-of-factly. "A mere 'yes' or 'no will suffice."
"Ryuzaki…" Light sighed. "What I meant to say was, why do you ask?"
"Well why didn't you say that?"
"I guess you caught me off guard."
"That was very careless of you."
Light stayed silent, waiting for L's answer. It didn't come. Time to prompt again.
"Well?"
"What?" L cocked his head slightly, like a puppy.
"Why did you ask?"
"Why do you generally ask questions? I asked because I want to know the answer."
Light rolled his eyes, but couldn't help smiling. "…I should have seen that coming."
"Yes. That's twice you've been a little slow. Are you sure you're well?"
"Yes…" Light grinned. "I wonder about you though…"
"I assure you I'm in perfect health. We appear to be digressing from our original topic though."
"Do I love you?"
"Do you have an answer?"
"No."
"Is that the answer?"
"No, I don't have an answer… What exactly do you mean?"
"By my question?"
"Mm." Light nodded.
"It's a fairly simple one, isn't it?" L frowned.
"Not really."
"Why not?"
Why not? Was L serious? Given their current situation, that question was far from simple.
"Well, how exactly do you want me to read that question? What do you mean by 'love'? There are many different kinds of love, you know."
L narrowed his eyes a little, as if offended by the implication that there may be something he didn't know. "I know that."
"Well then…?"
"I want to know," L said slowly, "if you love me."
Light closed his eyes in mild frustration. "…What makes you suddenly ask this?"
"Is there any reason why I shouldn't?"
Light thought about it. "Well…" he concluded, "it is a little odd to ask people that outright but… no, I guess not."
L continued to gaze expectantly at Light, not looking away even to pick up an iced donut from the box on the worktop. As the detective began exploring the sugary treat with his tongue, Light imagined a slight, triumphant twinkle in his companion's watchful eyes. Light would have to answer the question now - after admitting there really was no reason for him not to.
Fine then.
"I'm going to be brutally honest with you then," Light announced. "Is that okay?"
"I think that would be best," L replied through a mouthful of donut.
"Okay. Let's see - this is an important question so I need to make sure the right answer… Do I love you?"
L took another bite out of his donut. "Have you never thought about it before?" he asked.
"No, not really. Have you?"
"Yes," L inclined his head a little, and swallowed. "I wouldn't have asked you that question otherwise."
"Good point." Light agreed. Perhaps this was a good opportunity to find out some kind of clue as to what L really meant by his question, he thought. It probably wouldn't work, but… what the hell. "What would your answer be then?"
"You haven't answered me yet."
Damn.
"Will you tell me afterwards?"
"You really want to know?"
"I think it's only fair."
"…Stop stalling."
There really was no getting out of this, was there?
"…Fine. Hmm… Do I love you? … " Light decided that, as he was practically being forced into deciding on an answer to L's unexpected question, he may as well enjoy himself as best he could. "You're a pale, skinny, reclusive, secretive genius with a sugar addiction."
Light kept focused on L's face, watching his expression. For the moment, it remained unchanged. "You're undoubtedly the world's greatest detective…" Was that a raised eyebrow? "You're childish, stubborn and sometimes manipulative. You look scruffy. You always wear the same outfit." Nothing. "You sit in that weird way and claim that it's to boost your reasoning abilities. Wh…"
"No, it isn't."
Light paused at the interruption. "What?"
"It isn't to boost my reasoning abilities." L insisted, looking at the young man in the seat opposite him with just a hint of disdain, scooping pink icing off of a second donut with his finger as he did so.
"Well, it can't be a comfort issue…!" Light laughed. He had tried sitting in L's customary position - knees clutched to his chest, ankles tucked in beneath his buttocks - out of curiosity, to see what it felt like. It felt, Light decided, like something they might like to try out on the contestants on those endurance 'game shows'. Ouch.
"…I have told you once before - if I sit like other people do it lowers my reasoning abilities by 40 percent," L reminded him. "And… I actually do find it comfortable to sit that way."
"Really?"
"Yes. Please continue."
"…Where was I?"
L reached for the nearby tea set. "You were mocking my myriad idiosyncrasies."
"I was not."
"You could have fooled me…"
"Ah, so you're not infallible!"
"… I never said that. Anyway… continue."
Light grinned.
"… Ah, yes. When you pick things up it's always with just your thumb and forefinger, as if you're afraid of it. You never wear socks. I've only ever seen you comb your hair twice. You talk with your mouth full, you play everything by your own rules, you STARE at me all the time…"
"It's only…" L began to interrupt once more. Light knew what was coming.
"…Only because I might be Kira - I know. You're frustratingly persistent too."
"You have to admit, the case against you is…"
"Now who's deviating from the point?"
L dropped several sugar lumps into his cup. He picked up a teaspoon and stirred his tea. He continued to stare at Light… or was that more of a glare now?
Light's grin grew wider.
"Thank you. What else…? Aha - you talk and chew things in your sleep. Did you know that?"
"…Yes…" Light couldn't be sure, but… was that uncertainty on his companion's face? Worry? Embarrassment, even? "…But I never say anything of any importance… do I?"
"No… I can't even get any secrets out of you that way, don't worry. The thing that bothers me most is the chewing - so far it's only been the pillow or your thumb, but who knows what…"
"Light-kun…" L's tone was that of a parent reprimanding a child for speaking inappropriately. Light was really beginning to enjoy himself.
"What?" he asked, as innocently as he could. "I fear for my safety - imagine how it might affect my delicate psyche to wake up to another man nibbling my…"
"Your psyche is far from delicate, Light-kun… and it is doubtful you will ever awaken to me nibbling any part of you." L's expression had still barely changed, but Light felt the tone of the detective's voice had gotten slightly colder. "Please continue."
"…All right. What have I been through? The secrecy, the eating habits, lots of little quirky things, the questionable personality…"
"Do you really have anything more to say?" L asked between slurps of tea.
It looked as though L had had enough. Light wasn't about to give up now. Not when he'd come so far. Not when it was L who had initiated this situation anyway. No way. If L wanted to know if Light Yagami loved him, Light Yagami was going to make sure L saw it through to the end.
"I thought you wanted me to be honest with you. I thought you wanted an answer to your question."
L dropped his gaze, staring into his cup. "…From the way things are going, I'd say…"
"Ah-ah…" There's no turning back, L. "Would you conclude a case without pursuing all possible sources of evidence?"
L looked back up at the other man, the prime suspect in his current case.
"…Not unless I already had sufficient evidence, no."
"Would you stop a suspect in the middle of a statement, just because you were getting annoyed by it?"
There was a long pause. Impossibly dark eyes stared, unblinking, into warm brown ones.
"No. And I am not getting annoyed."
"You are."
"…Am not…"
"See? Childish."
"Look who's talking."
"…Shall I continue?"
"If you must."
Light smiled.
"As I was saying… I've been through the eating habits and anti-social tendencies, your appearance and your nocturnal activities… What next?"
"What indeed?" L muttered into his teacup.
Light moved his chair closer to the young man opposite him. L shifted a little in his seat, and peering up at Light through a shock of black hair. The detective was a little surprised at the expression on Light Yagami's face. He was smiling. Gently. Genuinely, even.
"You…" Light began. His tone and expression seemed entirely earnest. "… are the only person I've ever felt I could talk to on my own level."
L set down his teacup. What was this? One minute, Light Yagami seemed interested only in listing L's oddities, the next… what? He watched as Light got up from his seat and moved to stand close to L's own.
"The way you conduct yourself professionally is…" Light smiled "…unconventional, but certainly effective."
L felt a little… flustered? Confused? "Well, yes… but…"
"Ah-ah…" Light put a hand on L's shoulder, smiling down at L as he looked first at Light's fingers, then his face. "I haven't finished. You're dedicated. When it suits you, you're almost frighteningly honest. You're surprising, you're funny…"
"Funny?"
"You make me laugh, yes. But above all that…"
"What?" L cursed himself for not containing his curiosity.
Light turned L's chair so that they faced one another. L scrutinised every inch of his companion's face.
"…Remember when you told me I was your first ever friend?"
L frowned. "…Yes?"
"That meant a lot to me."
…Surely not?
"So, above all…" Light's smile was warm and honest - it wasn't just in his lips, but his eyes too. "Above all… you're my friend. You're the best friend I've ever had."
L unfolded himself from his seat and stood facing Light. He looked straight into the younger man's eyes. They were still smiling. But… the question…
"…So…?"
"So… the answer to your question, I suppose, is… yes."
L completely failed to conceal his feelings this time. "Yes?"
"Surprised?"
"…A little." Surprised, yes. Surprised and… what?
"Now, you promised you'd tell me what your answer was when I'd told you…" L watched Light closely. Still smiling, still genuine.
"I said nothing of the sort."
Light's smile dissolved into a look of dejection. The teasing, playful glint in his eyes faded and…
"…That's not fair, Ryuzaki."
"Now who's getting annoyed?"
Light didn't respond. L examined his every move. There was nothing in his body language that suggested his reaction was anything other than authentic. It was real. So that meant…
"…Do you mean it?"
Light's reply was soft and low, directed at the floor rather than L. "What do you think?"
There was nothing in his voice that implied deceit, either.
A small, rare smile formed on L's lips.
"…Light Yagami loves me…?"
"…As a friend, yes. Do you believe that?"
Light's gaze switched back to L. The detective had his back turned to him. Light's best friend. Great.
"You're…" Light began. A wave of contrasting emotions swept over him. He sighed. "Forget it."
L stared at the floor, thinking. He was no longer thinking about the situation - rather, how to put it into words. He frowned. He had said it himself earlier - surely it was simple? The easiest thing in the world. He didn't often it difficult to articulate his thoughts… It was simple. Just a few words.
"… Light-kun…"
"What?"
"I love you too."
Light looked up, not quite sure that he'd heard correctly. L was facing him now, beaming. Light had never thought it possible for the young detective to smile like that - it wasn't just in his lips, but his eyes too. Those dark, lifeless, unreadable eyes.
Light Yagami meant it. He really did. He loved L more than he could say. He decided not to try. He didn't often find it difficult to articulate his thoughts… It was simple. Actions speak louder than words.
L's breath caught in his throat as Light pulled him into a warm, gentle hug. He tried to remember the last time he had felt like this. A long time ago… if ever. Numbly, he responded, curling his arms around Light's shoulders, resting his head on Light's neck.
They stood, silently like this for some time, each caught in his own thoughts.
Slowly, they released each other. Light's hands remained on L's shoulders. He grinned.
"…Just… don't get any funny ideas… okay?"
L allowed himself a slight chuckle.
"Wouldn't dream of it."
Author's note: My first ever fan fic! Rates and reviews are more than welcome - preferably constructive (and nice!) ones! I hope I got L and Light right… I'm concerned I may have got distracted by the general cuteness of the situation… squees
The title unfortunately reminds me of Independent Women by Destiny's Child… and as it's L asking the question…
"Question - tell me what you think about me/ I buy my own shortcake and I buy my own chains…" LOL.