Food Testing
Jacob's POV
"Okay, Nessie. We're going to high school soon. We'll be out in public. You need to find some food that you like." Nessie wrinkled her nose in disgust.
I tried to be cheery. "Okay. Alice made a list. We'll try every food group. I'll be the reject container. You can rate it on a scale of one to ten. If it's above five, we'll assume it's tolerable. Here we go."
Pasta was first. Edward was the chef for today. Personally, I loved everything the leech made (made, ha ha, get it?), but Nessie preferred blood to human food. "Pasta is first." She eyed the bowl warily, then picked one small noodle, put it in her mouth, and chewed. After about two seconds, Nessie gagged and shoved the bowl at me. I swallowed the entire thing in one bite. "Definitely intolerable," she said.
Alice made a note and I grabbed the next dish off of the large coffee table in the living room. "Sourdough bread," I stated simply.
Nessie's reaction wasn't as bad this time. "Tolerable, but just barely."
"Great. We've got grains down. Now it's time for dairy. Have some cheese." I handed her a slice of cheddar cheese.
Nessie smelled it, and made a face, but took a small nibble anyways. She couldn't even finish it this time. As she started to turn green, I grabbed the enormous stainless steel bowl that Edward had thought to bring for circumstances such as these.
Nessie spit it out, but luckily didn't puke, and handed the bowl back to me. "Negative five. That crap is absolutely intolerable.'
"Okay, milk time," I said, handing her the crystal cup half-full of the white liquid.
Nessie took a tiny experimental sip. "Better, but still disgusting."
"That's fine. Have
some yo-"
"Can't we just pretend I'm lactose-intolerant?
I'm not going to be able to stand anything!"
"That's a plausible scenario. We can say that. I'll go fabricate the record right now. Doctor's signature and everything," Carlisle, who had been watching silently, said, and then rushed upstairs to his office.
I kept moving down Alice's list. "I think you might like meat a little better. Here's some steak." I really hope she didn't like it. Edward had prepared it perfectly. It's smell was making my mouth water.
I got my wish. "Next," Nessie said. I could tell she was getting impatient.
"Pork."
After three seconds, "Gross! This pig was eating mud and rotten shi—" Dagger-eyes from Edward "—I mean junk."
I stifled a laugh. "Chicken time."
Nessie took a hesitant bite. "Much better. This is the best so far."
Bella giggled.
I made a sympathetic face. "Sorry, Nessie, but it's time for vegetables now."
She really didn't like any of them, but broccoli was okay.
It was the same situation with the fruit. She kind of liked strawberries."
During the junk food testing, Nessie discovered that she actually enjoyed chocolate cake and brownies.
We were almost done, except for one last dish. "There is just one more thing," I told Nessie. "Eggs." I handed her the plate of scrambled eggs. I wasn't hopeful.
She took a bite, and then another. The entire plate was clean within ten seconds.
"These eggs are delicious!" she said.
Edward and Bella roared with laughter.