two chapters in one day! say it isn't so! this pairing was requested by the lovely dandelion-heart and was, surprisingly, a ton of fun to write. I couldn't find an official name for this couple, so I made one up. I hope you all enjoy this one, I rather liked it myself!

SHIPPING: JOEY X VIVIAN (SIDEWAYSHIPPING)

TITLE: LET'S JUST NOT THINK

THEME/MUSIC: PERPETUAL/ SALTWATER ROOM- OWL CITY

TAGLINE: NOBODY WILL DENY THAT THEY SHOULDN'T WORK.

WORDS: 1,009

Vivian thinks that they're a lot like the gears of a machine: they fit together enough to get the job done, but there's some bumping and grinding along the way.

No, not like the dance moves. Okay, maybe kind of like the dance moves. But that's really only when Joey's drunk and she's feeling especially sexy.

Believe it or not, that's not all the time.

Nobody will deny that they shouldn't work. Joey and Vivian. Vivian and Joey.

("We sound like a bad sitcom," she told him once, and he'd laughed that low laugh of his, the one that draws out until it fades away.

"Maybe we are a bad sitcom. I eat a lot and you can snark in time to laugh tracks."

She'd shrugged, playing with stray strands of his hair. "I'd watch it.")

They've been discussed many times and in many ways by many people whose opinions mean nothing to her.

"It's the kind of thing that defies gravity and common sense," Tristan had said and, as usual, nobody really listened.

Serenity simply avoided her, unless Vivian was feeling kinda unavoidable, and even then she'd only received tight-lipped smiles that didn't reach Serenity's eyes.

"If that's what makes Joey happy, I don't think we ought to interfere," Yugi had said, which effectively ended all other arguments.

Except Téa's. She definitely had a thing or three to say, some of which are simply not polite to print. "I thought you were Mai's friend," was how her tirade ended, in a voice that was a good blend of parental disapproval and unwanted disappointment.

Vivian had smothered the ensuing annoyance (and maybe a smidgen of guilt), opting instead for a clipped tone and narrowed eyes. "Mai Valentine didn't take what was waiting for her. All she did was sit around and feel sorry for herself. Not flattering for any body type and definitely not smart."

"He's not one of your silly accessories," Téa had spat.

She'd arched a shapely eyebrow. "He's not Mai's, either."

Granted, Mai had actually done more than just sit around and sigh. She'd talked about Joey often enough that he sounded like he had hair wrought from gold and abs made of steel. "He's stupidly beautiful," she'd murmured with a faraway look that never really left her eyes.

(And it was pretty much true. The first time she and Joey had sex was awkward and stilted up until she'd pushed him under her and fixed an unamused stare at his bewildered expression.

"If you want this to work, you're gonna have to get into it," she'd said. "I'm not doing this to just admire your blond hair and killer abs while you still have clothes on."

That had made him grin, a lopsided, rueful little thing. "And what is this?" he'd asked her softly.

His eyes were warm and so was his skin as she leaned in and pushed her mouth to his.

"Whatever we want it to be.")

When they came home after that international Duel Monsters tournament, she'd gone to bed exhausted and indecisive about what she was going to do. She woke up the next morning and knew that she wanted to see if Joey Wheeler really was as good as she'd heard.

She'd put her hair in a low ponytail draped over her shoulder. Her makeup was light, but bold. She'd worn her favorite pair of wedges and denim skirt, and rang his doorbell feeling confident.

It was kind of like a job interview, only she knew that failure wasn't an option.

(When someone dangles something in front of you, something too good to be true, you take it.)

He'd answered too slowly for her liking, his hair rumpled and his voice roughened with sleep. He looked defeated, if anything. Not like the glowing picture Mai had painted.

Or maybe this was the picture Mai had actually painted. The one colored over with goodbyes and unresolved tension.

"Vivian?" Joey had grunted.

"Hey. You want to let me in?"

He frowned slightly and hesitated. "I don't-"

"Thanks," she'd beamed, and slipped in.

(She's rather good at it, too. She's like a fish when she wants to be: seemingly innocent and flashy, but slippery and persistent as hell.

"He's a good kid," Mai had said, on some night in China when they'd both had a little too much to drink and Vivian had goaded Mai exactly as far as she wanted. "Good to a fault. He does dumb, brash things and grows up at the most unexpected times. He laughs too much and isn't as serious as he ought to be. But when he is…"

"Why'd you leave him behind?" she had wanted to know.

Mai shrugged and laughed. "Maybe because I can't face him. I'm not the person he thinks I am.")

"You are exactly who you appear to be," he tells her, lazily tracing the curve of her bare hip.

It's probably well into the afternoon, judging from the sunny light spilling through his curtains. Somehow, they've fallen into a comfortable routine, one that Vivian doesn't particularly mind (and in the rare moments she does, she wonders what it is that they're doing and if the time she's willing to invest is enough). She turns in his arms, mussing the bedsheets. He smiles sleepily at her.

"And who is that?"

"A sly vixen. Pretty, damn annoying, stuck to me like we're in perpetual motion."

"And you're an idiot."

His features slacken and his eyes shut. "So they tell me."

("Yeah, it's true," she tells Mai over the phone, in a voice that isn't hers. "Looks like you missed your chance."

It's quiet long enough that she wonders if Mai maybe hung up, but she hears a shaky intake of breath. Her fingers curl around the cord.

"Looks like I did.")

"Joey." She nudges at his nose with hers.

"Hm?"

She kisses him slowly, letting his taste linger on her tongue, and asks him in a whisper.

"Do you wish we'd fall in love?"

He doesn't open his eyes. "All the time."

in the Japanese version of the anime, it is shown in the epilogue that Vivian and Mai apparently teamed up as partners for an international Duel Monsters tournament. this whole situation was a far-fetched speculation of events, but I had a good time writing it.

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