Author's Note: Hi guys! I've had so many ideas swimming around lately that I thought it would be a good idea to start a collection of one-shots, drabbles, ficlets, etc that don't really stand alone so great yet don't really lend themselves to anything I'm currently working on. They'll all vary in length and topic and I doubt they'll have anything like a unifying theme. Some might be connected to each other or other fics I've written and if they are, I'll try to put it in the Author's note or give you guys a heads up in some way, shape or form. I also wanted to take the chance to thank everyone who's reviewed my stories. It really is very encouraging and I do appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you thought of it or if you enjoyed it or any other comments you might have had. Anyways, Caving In To The Madness is actually based on a story I wrote for a creative writing class I took a couple years back. The original prompt I got was to write a story and convey it using only dialogue. Obviously I've done a lot of tweaking so it's not all dialogue and so that it fits the LwD universe. I have no idea what prompted me to think of that old story in the first place but once I thought of it, I just knew I wanted to write a LwD version of it. This story is actually the first fanfic I've written where it didn't center around Casey and Derek. Instead, it centers around Casey and Emily. Actually, I think it's pretty much centered around Emily, which was fun. So here's Caving In To The Madness, I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Life With Derek

Caving In To The Madness

The incessant sound of Metro Station's "Shake It," signaling an incoming call, roused a reluctant Emily from sleep. She was hunched over her desk having fallen asleep while working on a creative writing assignment due Monday. She sent a quick prayer of thanks that she'd fallen asleep on a notebook rather than on her computer keyboard. She winced slightly at the memory of how long it had taken the indentations on her face to fade the last time that had happened.

Without opening an eye, she reached blindly in the general direction the music was coming from and sighed contentedly when the music abruptly stopped. She was halfway back to sleep when the music started up again. This time her hand managed to locate the phone and bring it to her exposed ear in time to answer the call.

"Hello?" she mumbled groggily.

"Okay so I know he's up to something," said the slightly muted voice of her best friend, Casey MacDonald.

"Huh?" The cobwebs of sleep were taking their sweet time clearing out, but only mostly because Emily wasn't quite ready to be rid of them.

"I said I know he's up to something," Casey repeated, her voice still carefully muted.

"Casey?" Em asked, recognition finally dawning on her.

"Yes, Casey. Who else would it be?" she answered impatiently. "Anyway, you've got to help me figure out what he's up to."

"Who's up to what?" In her half-sleep state, Emily found following a conversation with Casey even more difficult than it usually was.

"Em, focus! I just told you I didn't know what he was up to. But he's definitely up to something. I just need to figure out what."

"What time is it?" Emily groaned.

"Umm…it's a quarter past ten. See?" she told her triumphantly. "That's why I know he's up to something. He's never up this early on a Sunday."

"Casey, most people our age aren't up this early on a Sunday," Emily told her matter-of-factly.

"I'm up," she replied defensively.

"Sweetie, you aren't most people."

"Fine. But I know that jerk is up to something. Probably he's plotting something against me."

"Paranoid, are we?" Emily hoped she'd managed to keep the smile out of her voice.

"I'm not paranoid. History shows that he only ever shows some kind of work ethic when he's trying to get a date with a girl who shows any kind of judgment and actually spurns him initially or if he's plotting. And usually the target of his evil plotting is me."

"Are we talking about Derek?" Emily asked, already sorry she hadn't let the call go to voicemail. Not that it would have mattered. Casey would have just dialed the house phone and her mother, father or Dimi would have given her the phone anyway.

"Of course we're talking about Derek. Em are you even listening to me?"

"Trying not to," Em muttered before realizing she'd said it out loud. At that, she finally opened her eyes but chose to keep her head down for a moment longer.

"What?"

"Nothing," she replied. Letting out a yawn and doing a stretch before hunching back over and propping her head up with her free hand.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, Em. Did I wake you up?" Casey stumbled out, realizing her mistake.

Half-asleep, Emily wasn't able to filter her words as well as was necessary and instead of saying, "Oh, of course not Casey," like she normally would have, she answered honestly with a, "Yeah."

"Oh my god, I'm such a horrible friend. I'm just terrible. I can't believe I didn't think to worry that you might have still been –"

"Casey, relax. It's fine," Em assured her.

"Are you sure?" she asked her nervously.

"Yeah, it's fine." Then, thinking to distract her from the topic and answer a question she realized she'd been wondering for a few minutes now, she asked her, "Case, why are you whispering?"

"Oh, that's simple. It's because I'm following him."

Sitting up straight and now fully awake, Emily demanded, "What?"

"I'm following him. I was rudely roused from sleep by his alarm clock at nine this morning. Naturally I became curious as to why he, of all people, would set his alarm clock for nine a.m. on a Sunday. So I peeked out and saw him run around trying to get ready without alerting everyone's attention to him. I quickly came to the conclusion that he was up to no good so I, of course, also quickly got dressed and borrowed mom's car so I could follow Derek and figure out what he's up to."

"Oh my god," Emily breathed, again not able to catch herself. She gave her head a quick shake to try and rid herself of the remaining cobwebs.

"What was that, Em?"

"Uh, nothing. Casey, please tell me you didn't really follow Derek."

"But Em, I can't just keep sitting back allowing him to prank me and make me miserable. If I did, it would practically be like me inviting him to. I'm not just going to react anymore," she whispered firmly. "I'm taking a stand."

"No, Casey," Emily told her, hoping she sounded supportive yet reasonable. "You're stalking."

"I am not," Casey rebutted, then realized she'd spoken a little too loudly. Emily heard some sounds of air whipping by and she figured Casey was looking around to see if she'd drawn attention to herself with her outburst.

If she hadn't drawn the attention with her yelling, Emily thought to herself, she's drawing attention now. She could practically picture the scene.

"I am not," Casey reiterated, this time back in her stage whisper voice.

"Casey, you're trailing around after him. I'm assuming he doesn't know?"

"Don't be silly, Em. Of course he doesn't know. If he knew, he'd try to stop me and then I wouldn't be able to figure out what he's planning."

"Casey, that's the definition of stalking," Em stressed, hoping she was talking some sense into her best friend.

"No it isn't. I'm following him," Casey asserted. Then for good measure she added,

"From a perfectly legal distance."

Emily sighed. She knew this was going to end badly but she had tried and no jury could find her guilty for accessory. "Fine, whatever," Em said in resignation. "Have you figured anything out yet?"

"Hold on a sec Em, I might have lost him." The line went silent temporarily as she imagined Casey was trying desperately to find the trail again. Realizing this was going to be a long conversation that would only require a few responses from her occasionally, Emily decided to get back to working on her assignment.

She was in the midst of booting up the computer when Casey's voice returned.

"I found him," she informed her.

"Did he see you?" Em asked as she quickly opened up the blank word document template.

"Good question," Casey told her. "No, I think I'm in the clear so far."

"Good job," she replied absently.

"Oh no!"

"Casey?" Em asked alarmed. There was some shuffling on the other end of the line before Casey spoke again.

"Sorry, I had to dive for cover."

"Casey, maybe there's another way. You could ask Edwin if he was up to something."

"Edwin?" she snorted. "He lives in fear of Derek."

"You could bribe him," Em suggested as she typed a few lines into the computer and scrutinized them.

"I could. But Derek would find out." Emily could practically hear her rolling her eyes.

"Derek always finds out when Edwin betrays him. And then Edwin would just rat out that I found out and he'd add an additional phase to the plotting," Casey continued.

"What about a counter-plot?"

"Oh my gosh! That was close. He rounded a corner and almost saw me." She let out a long sigh of relief before continuing. "No, a counter-plot would only cause him to counter-counter plot. And we both know how that will end. I'm just not devious and evil enough to out-evil him."

"Okay, how about simply neutralizing it?"

"He out-siblings me. I could neutralize anything he does. Liz could neutralize anything he has Ed do. But I don't have anyone to neutralize Marti."

Emily waited for it.

"Unless…" Emily smiled to herself. There it was. The unspoken request move her best-friend did so well.

"Absolutely not. You cannot use Dimi," she told her, letting the smile be heard in her tone.

"Why not?" she pouted.

"One, Marti would eat Dimi alive and two, do you want my parents to forbid me from being your friend?"

"No," she reluctantly agreed. "Then I'd really have no friends."

"And with Sheldon gone, I would too."

"Okay, so neutralizing is out. See? Reconnaissance is really my only option. Me knowing the plan is the only way to know how to plan my next move."

"I suppose." Emily was still doubtful this would work.

A good ten minutes passed and Emily worked on her homework while Casey would fill her in on how the "following" was going.

"Miss, can I help you?" came the sound of an unknown female voice from Casey's end of the line.

"Uh…umm…no, I'm fine. Thank you….no really, I'm fine," was Casey's response to the stranger.

"Case? What's going on?"

"Oh sorry about that. Darn salesclerk almost gave me away," said Casey, clearly annoyed.

"Casey, where are you?"

"Some department store."

"You're stalking him in a department store?"

"Following," she corrected. "And yes. I'll admit I was surprised myself."

"Sweetie, it's been over half an hour and you still haven't found out anything."

"I know. Do you think he's on to me and is just messing with me?"

"Case, maybe he's just shopping?"

"Shopping? Derek?" she exclaimed in disbelief. "Oh crap!" There was suddenly a dull thud followed by some swishing noises. Emily actually pulled the phone away from her ear to look at it before returning it to the crook of her neck, between her ear and her shoulder.

"What happened?" she asked her.

"I said his name too loud and he actually turned," Casey lamented. Or at least as best she could while still whispering. "I had to dive into a clothing rack to hide."

Emily was almost sad she wasn't there to see that. Then she reminded herself she wasn't supposed to enjoy her best friend's follies.

"Oh no, I'm going to lose him."

"Well, you know where you last saw him," Emily said encouragingly.

"Yeah but I don't know where he was heading. It seemed like he was –"

The sound of clothes being shoved aside reached Emily and interrupted Casey.

"Miss, are you sure you don't need any assistance?" came the voice from earlier.

"I'm fine. I just…umm...tripped. I tripped. I'm fine."

"Right," was the salesclerk's only response before Emily heard Casey push herself up and pat herself down.

"Are you alright, Case?"

"Embarrassed and mortified but yes, I'm fine."

"Casey, I think maybe it's time for you to –" She was cut off by the excited intake of breath from Casey.

"I see him! He's heading into a room. I'm going after him. Edwin is probably there. I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner. It's the rendezvous point," she concluded.

Emily didn't like the sound of it.

"Case, when you said department store earlier, did you mean clothing store?"

The whipping sounds ceased and Emily guess she'd paused to look around.

"Oh, you're right, Em," she said sounding as though realizing it for the first time. Knowing how focused Casey had been on stalking Derek, Emily didn't put it past her. Never mind that she'd taken cover in a rack of clothing. "It's a clothing store."

"And he's heading into a room?" Emily asked carefully.

"Yes, I'm actually almost there. He already went in."

"Casey, by any chance was he carrying anything with him?" Like clothes? She added silently.

"Oh my gosh, he was probably carrying the supplies. I should have tried harder to see what it was. Good thinking, Em."

Emily had to a pause on working on her homework to hold her head in her hands before returning all her attention to her best friend, who unfortunately appeared hell bent on walking into another humiliating experience.

"Casey, think carefully. He's walking into a room in a clothing store." Emily sincerely hoped she wasn't too late.

"Oh my god," came Casey's harried whisper.

"Yes," said Emily in a much relieved voice, thinking she'd finally come to the conclusion Emily had.

"I'm in the fitting room area."

"Wait, you actually went in?" Emily was beyond shocked now.

"It's ingenious, really. I never would have thought to look for their rendezvous point in here. Obviously it's the men's dressing area so they never expected me to find them here."

"Casey, no. Sweetie, I need you to listen to me," Emily begged her.

"All the doors are open except one at the end." Emily realized Casey wasn't even listening anymore but as her friend she couldn't give up.

"Casey, seriously. Whatever you're thinking, I need you to unthink it."

"The stalls look pretty low, I bet I could stand on it and peek over to see what they're working on."

Emily heard the creak of a door and realized that Casey was actually going into one of the stalls.

"Oh god. Casey, girl! I think this obsession both you and Derek have of one-upping each other has finally driven you crazy."

"Em, hold on a sec. I just need to stand on my tiptoes and –"

"Casey!"

" –OH MY GOD HE'S –"

"Casey? Casey!" Emily called out over her friend's sudden yelling.

"Who'd have thought Space Case was a Peeping Tom." Emily's eyes bugged out as she recognized the calm, smug voice of none other than Derek Venturi followed quickly by the sound of what Emily could only assume was Casey dropping her cell phone before the line went dead.

Emily slowly pressed the 'end' button and put the phone down on her desk. She expected to be greeted with the upset Casey showing up in her room within the hour. That was unless of course Derek decided to dole out his own brand of punishment immediately after Casey snapped out of her shock. In which case, Emily expected her phone line to be tied up for hours later this evening.

Realizing that in either scenario it would be best for her to get done as much work as she could now, she decided to finish up the creative writing assignment she'd already started.

She quickly reread what she'd already written of the original story she'd based on her and Sheldon's relationship and realized she wasn't as happy with where the story was going as she'd have liked. She sighed and glumly wished her relationships were at least half as interesting as the stuff Casey dealt with daily. Suddenly a slow smile began to form on her lips as an idea occurred to her and she opened up a new blank template.

She decided they owed her. With the stuff Derek and Casey forced her to put up with, she figured the least they could do was provide her with a good story to tell come Monday. And so, with a smirk that would do Derek proud, Emily Davis began to type the story of a girl who moved into a new house in a new town, and started going to a new school where she clashes with a certain guy who always seems to have her caving in to the madness…of falling in love.

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So that's the end of Caving In To The Madness. I liked the title and thought it was a great kickoff and title piece for the collection. I hope you enjoyed it. Stay tuned for more and remember reviews are always welcome!

- SugarRune