So this is my first attempt at a Twilight fanfiction. There are spoilers from Breaking Dawn in here so I strongly suggest people who haven't read the book to not read this. Anyway, I hope my attempt at this one-shot is successful and please leave me your thoughts in a review.
BREAKING DAWN SPOILERS (for those who didn't bother to read the paragraph above lol)
Important things you need to know:
In this one-shot, Jacob doesn't imprint on Renesmee. It would be very hard to write a love story about Jacob/Leah if he was constantly with someone else he was fond of. So I'm going to make Embry imprint on Renesmee instead lol.
I also made Jacob and Leah a bit older. Jacob is eighteen and Leah is seventeen. They both attend high school since the school year just recently started up again and no vampire/werewolf trouble is happening at the moment.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the songs I use or the characters from the Twilight Saga. Although I wished I had my very own Jacob .
Once Burnt, Twice Shy
By: Chibi Neko-Chan2
Editor: MoshiMoshiQueen
"Talking"
Thoughts
Emphasis
Lyrics
XXXXX- Scene Change
Leah's POV
Here
I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't
pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep
inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these
hazel eyes
The sky looked promising. The sun was gliding across the clouds slowly, beaming its light over the land before it. The chirping birds flew high above the leafy, green treetops as deer leaped across the forest's floors. People outside my window had beaming smiles across their faces that seemed to radiate happiness.
Not.
It was actually a miserable, cloudy day with a promise of thunderstorms later in the evening. But really, what did you expect? I did live in La Push, Washington after all. In La Push, the weather was almost always dreary. I didn't mind the weather and I happened to know another 'group' who didn't mind the gloomy weather either. The continuous bad weather actually helped those bloodsuckers live in perfect harmony.
Suddenly, I had a really bad and overly sweet taste in my mouth. I didn't want to think about them. They were the reason I was having this inner, emotional battle with myself anyway.
I bit down on my thumbnail as I turned to look outside my window. There literally wasn't a person in sight, which really meant something. See, I don't have normal vision because I'm not a normal person. A normal person didn't think 20/20 vision was classified as nearly blind. A normal person also couldn't look outside a window and see for miles and miles.
My vision isn't the only beyond superb sense I have. In fact, all my senses are outstanding. We are talking about me after all- Leah Clearwater.
Just Kidding.
The superb senses I have are one of the few advantages about being a werewolf.
Yeah, you heard me right.
I'm a werewolf. A big, bad w-e-r-e- Wait.
Oops, my bad. I mean 'shape-shifter.' I rolled my eyes at the hideously lame term. I mean, at least the word 'werewolf' gave some people a chill. The only thing the word 'shape-shifter' did was remind you how lame of a term it really was.
However, being a shape-shifter isn't as dull as it sounds. Morphing into a wolf anytime I want, especially when I'm angry, is actually pretty cool and pretty convenient. I have my own pack and everything. We're like family and we always look out for each other.
Before I bother going any further, I'll answer the question that I know has been troubling you since I brought this whole shape-shifter/wolf thing up. No, we don't hunt people. We usually eat when we're our human selves. If we happen to get hungry in our wolf forms, we hunt elks or other animals of that nature.
Now as there are advantages about being in a pack, there are also disadvantages. Right now, I can think of two disadvantages that stick out like a sore thumb. The first disadvantage is that while you are in your wolf form, every wolf in your pack can read your thoughts. There is no privacy or secrecy. You have to learn how to control your thoughts or else...well… you were just screwed.
The second disadvantage is that packs have ranks and they have leaders. Although I am ranked pretty high in my own pack (second-in-command in fact), we all have to listen to our leader. We don't have choices or options. We have to do what our leader, known as the Alpha, instructs. The Alpha holds that much power. Although my pack's personal Alpha doesn't believe in taking away our free will, he will always have the option of doing so.
I swallowed as I thought about my leader. His name was Jacob Black and he was-
He was-
He was the main reason I was having this inner battle with myself. He was the reason why I was lying on my bed as every other seventeen-year-old girl went shopping, hung out with her friends, or just lived her life. The obnoxious and nauseating thought of him has been bugging me since my little brother, Seth, delivered some news a couple weeks ago. The news, which involved Jacob, obviously must have pissed me off because after hearing it, I started acting very strange. My emotions, which were usually always kept inside, were now starting to surface and were becoming complicated. My every thought has started to revolve around Jacob and it has bothered the hell out of me because I can't control it, I can't tame it.
It's fortunate that I can control my thoughts when I'm in my wolf form. I just can't stop my mind from wandering when I'm in my human form.
It's a real pain.
Which brings me to right now- I am still in this wretched position despite all the events that have happened these past few weeks. The events that are bringing me closer to the truth that I don't want to realize. I'm afraid because deep down, I have an idea of what the truth is. I have an idea of why Jacob, of all people, has been on my mind 24 freaking 7. I want to ignore it one hundred percent and I want to avoid confrontation- even if it is just with me.
So instead of trying to discover this 'truth', I'll recap the past events for you so that you can better understand the current situation I'm in, so that you can feel even more sympathy for me or just confirm that I am truly insane.
It all started about two and a half weeks ago. I was actually in this bedroom, minding my own business, when my brother decided to barge in and ruin my life…
XXXXX FLASHBACK XXXXX (Out of Leah's POV, Just regular third person)
I'm
in the business of misery, let's take it from the top
She's got a
body like an hourglass that's tickin' like a clock
It's a matter
of time before we all run out...
When I thought he was mine, she
caught him by the mouth
"Le-ah!" Seth sing-songed as he opened his sister's bedroom door. The tall, dark-haired boy nearly danced his way into his sister's bright orange room. Seth wore a long-black sleeve shirt, baggy dark jeans, and black vans. A silver watch glistened on his wrist.
Seth studied his sister's room for a moment. He thought Leah's room was quite a contradiction to her pessimistic personality. Her furniture, which she had since she was kid, was a pearly white. A golden knob was missing on one of her dresser's drawers and the lime green lamp on the end table beside her spilled out lilac-colored light. A collage of family and friends hung above her bed and she had a poster of the movie 'Super Bad' on her door. A Moroccan-style comforter with different patterns and colors covered her queen size bed and nearly flowed to the wooden floor. Childish stickers clung to the outing of a small television that sat on top of her DVD player and wooden cabinet that was filled with all sorts of DVDs. A rug that resembled a blue, peace-frog was the finishing touch.
Leah lay on top of her bed. She wore long, gray sweatpants and a dark purple t-shirt that had the name of some local band across the front of it. Her shoulder-length, recently highlighted brunette hair was braided into pigtails and silver hoops hung from her ears. Her nails were unpolished and her face was make-up free. (A/N: When I first wrote this fic, I thought Leah had blonde hair. I hated how SM didn't really go into character about her appearance but I got reviews mentioning that she had dark hair because of her genes… so I changed it but added highlights. So don't review me saying "she doesn't have highlights!" Well she does now!)
A big smile was painted on Seth's face as he walked up to his older sister. Leah held an old Cosmo magazine and casually flipped through it as music poured through her old-fashioned headphones. She was too absorbed into her music to notice the written magazine articles. Leah pretended to not notice her younger brother as well.
"Leah!" Seth shouted again, now hovering above her and waving his hands in front of her face to get her attention. When the brunette didn't lift her eyes toward him, the smile on his face faltered.
"If she doesn't answer me, I swear I'll tear those headphones to pieces," Seth mumbled so low under his breath that it would even be hard for Leah to understand. Nevertheless, Leah pulled off her headphones and placed them behind her head by her boom box. She flicked the boom box off before she turned to look at her brother.
"Is that a threat, little brother?"
"Of course not! I was just trying to get your attention," Seth waited for Leah to move her long, tan legs before he sat down on her bed, "Boy, do I have news for you."
Leah casually tossed her Cosmo magazine at the wall, "What is it?"
"It's about Jacob."
Leah hated how her breath automatically held when her brother brought up his name. Leah use to not care at all about the naturally tan boy. She use to hate him as much as he hated her. However, in the course of about half a year, the two got use to each other and started getting along. At first, they didn't really have a choice. They were assigned seats next to each other in all the three classes they shared and participated as partners. Jacob slowly broke down Leah's wall over time and the two started to form a friendship. Although she acted like didn't give a flying flip about him, Leah really cared about her new friend.
"And your point is?" Leah questioned, trying to sound and look as nonchalant as she could. Seth's eyes narrowed at her words; he knew what kind of game she was playing.
"And my point is that Jacob imprinted," Seth finished, a smug look crossing his face because he knew the information before she did.
"Good for him, I guess," Leah mumbled softly, shrugging her shoulders as she made herself more comfortable on her bed. The smug look left Seth's face and was replaced with a look of concern.
"Are you okay?"
Leah grabbed a pillow from behind her back and hugged it to her chest, "Why wouldn't I be?"
Seth shrugged at her question as he got up and ambled to his sister's door, "I'll see ya at dinner."
"Kay," Leah responded before Seth shut her door. She sighed as she lifted and pressed the pillow gently to her face.
Why am I reacting like this? Who gives a damn if Jacob imprinted? Paul and Quil have imprinted too. So then, why do I feel so upset? It almost feels like the time Sam imprinted on Emily and left me behind. Although I'm over with Sam now, I'm not over the situation he put me in. How could he take my cousin that seemed more like an older sister and best friend from me? People say time heals everything, but is that really true? Will the feelings of regret and bitterness ever truly fade? Seth didn't leave me numb, he left me damaged and broken. I'm not sure If I can forgive him for that and I'm not sure if I can forgive Emily for letting that happen.
Now it feels like Jacob ripped my heart out of my chest just like Sam did. But WHY? I didn't…
Whatever, but I do wonder who he imprinted on…
"Seth?" Leah called out, not bothering to yell. She knew he would be able to hear her clearly.
Leah's door opened a minute later and Seth popped his head in, "What's up?"
"Who exactly did Jacob imprint on?"
"Um…" Seth bit down on his lip as he glanced away from his sister. He hated being the bearer of bad news.
"Just tell me."
"…Renesmee."
There was a long moment of silence. Leah continued to stare at her brother impassively as the toddler's name registered in her head. Seth cautiously took a step back, fearing his sister's next reaction.
"Oh," Leah said. That was it.
Knowing how his sister truly felt about the Cullens, Seth left Leah's room and shut her door.
So Jacob imprinted on the little bloodsucker after all. The little princess that everyone is just so fond of. Well, I shouldn't be surprised. If he liked the mother, it's expected of him to like the daughter too.
Leah had the urge to spit.
He has horrible taste in woman. I know imprinting can't be helped, but Jacob knows how much I loathe the Cullen clan. I feel betrayed once a-freaking-gain.
A moment passed. Then a small, somewhat malicious smile gradually crossed Leah's face as she peered outside her window.
Play with my feelings Jacob and I'll play with yours.
Well
there's a million other girls who do it just like you Well I refuse,
I refuse, I refuse!
Looking as
innocent as possible to get to who,
They want and get what they
like, it's "easy if you do it right"
XXXXX END OF FLASHBACK XXXXX
I admit I was acting a bit childish. Jacob didn't imprint on Renesmee just to spite me. Nevertheless, I was torn. I didn't know how to handle what I was feeling despite the heart-wrenching experience I had with Sam. So, I let loose.
XXXXX FLASHBACK XXXXX (Leah's POV)
I watched the water slosh under my dark purple rain boots as I walked out of the school. It had rained all morning and massive rain puddles were everywhere. The concrete I walked on was still a dark tan color due to the rain. I squeezed my puffy, over-sized lilac raincoat closer to my body as the cold, crisp air blew in my face.
Jacob was walking right beside me. I tried to not focus on how good he looked in his azure-colored jacket and black jeans. His long, straight black hair couldn't hide the angles of his faultless face. He didn't need to flex to show the muscles under his smooth, tan skin. It was irritating how attractive the pest was.
Anyway, he was blabbering on about some stupid math test we just finished. He still didn't have a clue that I was completely ignoring him. He figured my 'hm's and 'I don't care's were just my PMS talking. I badly wanted to give him the finger but I restrained myself. He would realize that he was on the top of my bad list sooner or later.
"Question 29 was outrageous. Who needs to know how to factor polynomials anyway?" Jacob glanced away as one of our classmates, Bobby Weigler, strolled up to us. He handed a yellow flyer to Jacob and then to me. I only glimpsed at the paper for a moment to see the words 'FREE BOOZE' written in caps on the top. I stuffed the flyer in my pocket.
"Party at Stephen Yurman's house next Saturday! Bring as many friends and booze as you can," He nudged Jacob as he winked up at him; "There will be plenty of hot babes there, Jacob. You two game?"
"I don't know…" I heard Jacob mutter, glancing at his flyer before giving Bobby a doubtful look.
"Sure," I answered simply, not really paying attention to Bobby, as I increased my strides. Bobby shrugged as he walked away to talk to a group of freshmen girls.
I wanted to get away from Jacob Black and fast. Jacob raised a dark eyebrow as he increased his strides as well so he could keep up with me. It wasn't hard for him.
"Leah."
"Jacob."
"Are you okay?" He questioned gently, his face a concerned one. I hated that face. First Seth, then my associate Cassandra, Quil, and now Jacob. I felt my temper spill over as my hands started to shake. It was hard to control my body from transforming to a wolf right then and there, but I managed.
Jacob had this coming for him anyway.
"I am so sick of everyone asking me that! I am perfectly fine!" I shouted, throwing my hands in the air for emphasis. A warm hand suddenly gripped my forearm and I felt myself spin around. I stuck my chin arrogantly up at Jacob as he studied my face.
"That answer really convinced me," Jacob said sarcastically as his dark brown eyes read my light green ones, "Get if off your chest and tell me what's been pissing you off lately so you can stop acting like this."
"Acting like what, Jacob? A bitch?"
"I was going to say 'annoying' but that fits," Jacob couldn't help the teasing smile that broke on his face. I tried to shake off his grip but he didn't let go, "Come on, Leah."
"Do you really want to know what's been pissing me off?" I asked sweetly, taking a step closer to him so that our bodies were brushing. Jacob blinked before nodding, "Yeah."
"YOU!" I shouted, successfully shaking my arm away from his grip. I then walked over to my parking space and straddled the motorcycle. I fastened my helmet as I watched Jacob's eyes grow wide.
"That's my bike!"
I laughed bitterly as I kicked the bike to life. The music flared loudly from the radio and people turned to stare at us.
I
don't give a damn 'bout my reputation Oh no not me
You're living in the past
it's a new generation
A girl can do what she wants to do and
that's
What I'm gonna do
An' I don't give a damn ' bout my bad
reputation
I shouted over the music, "Took you long enough. I hope you don't mind me borrowing it… actually, I do hope you mind. Later!"
"What the hell?! Leah! Come back here!" Jacob shouted from my retreating form, not bothering to run after me.
I gave him the bird for an answer.
I was satisfied.
XXXXX END OF FLASHBACK XXXXX
And it wasn't only in my human form that I let loose.
XXXXX FLASHBACK XXXXX (Regular POV)
"If any of you get scared, you are always welcome back into the house," A petite woman said, eyeing the six young girls in front of her, "And don't stay up too late."
"We won't!" The girls promised in unison. One girl, with pretty, long, brown hair that fell to her butt, hugged the woman and smiled an almost toothless grin up at her, "I love you mom! I promise to be careful!"
"We're only going to that tent," A blonde girl named Stacy stated, pointing to a tent about twenty feet away, "We'll still be in your backyard, Holly."
"You girls have fun," Holly's mother said before shutting the back door to her house. She peeked outside the door's window before going back up to bed.
"This is going to be so much fun!" A red-headed, freckled face girl squealed as the snack bag in her hand swung back and forth. The girls' high-pitched laughter filled the night as they made their way into the green camping tent. The girls eyed each other as they sat down on their sleeping bags.
"Who wants to tell a scary story?" a small African-American girl asked, her white teeth nearly sparkling in the dark night.
"No Nina! I hate scary stories!" another girl screamed, her black bob framing her chubby, pale face. Tears nearly escaped her eyelids at the thought of scary stories.
"It'll be fine Wendy! They're only make-believed!" The blonde's identical twin confirmed. She then turned towards the rest of the girls, "I'll tell the scary story!"
A howl ripped through the air and Wendy screamed. Stacy giggled as the other girls shivered, "That was appropriate!"
"Once upon a time there was an evil witch," Kacy started, her sapphire eyes twinkling as she leaned towards her friends to whisper the story, "A brave man tried to stop the witch from her evil doings but the witch framed him for murder. One night, when he was sitting in the smelly, cold jail cell, he heard an evil crackle. He looked out the window to see the witch staring at him. She was muttering a spell under her scabby lips. The man didn't know what the witch cursed him with until there was a full moon."
There was complete silence in and outside the tent. A small tear rolled down Wendy's fat cheek as she continued to listen to Kacy's story.
"When the full moon shone, the man turned into a werewolf. The spell the witch cast on him made him thirst for human blood. He killed his cellmateand then broke down the iron wall with his strength. He then killed everyone in the jail and everyone he saw outside. It was told that a good wolf brought this wicked wolf down but there are rumors that the bloody thirsty werewolf still exists today."
The girls looked at each other with huge eyes. They all jumped when they heard a cell phone ringing outside their tent.
"Ah man! I left my cell phone outside! Come on and get it with me guys," Nina said, standing up and unzipping the tent. When the last girl, who was Wendy, stepped out of the tent, Nina zipped it back up.
The group of young girls stepped around the side of the tent to see a gray wolf with Nina's ringing cell phone in her mouth.
Boo. Leah thought as she dropped the cell phone out of her mouth and growled. The girls screamed and ran away in various directions. Leah could barley hold in her laughter as she chased after them.
The identical twins desperately tried to unzip the caught zipper so they can safely get into the tent. Nina and the red-headed girl ran up a slide to stand on top of the jungle gym for protection. Holly stood in a fenced corner screaming bloody murder. Leah turned to chase Wendy, who was running towards the back door. Wendy glanced back at the skinny, gray wolf, which licked her lips as she chased Wendy. Leah's sharp teeth glistened in the moonlight as her graceful body leaped forward. Wendy ended up slamming face first into the glass door when she faced forward again. Leah almost died of laughter when the chubby girl fell back on the ground; a huge wet spot could be easily spotted where the little girl wetted her pants.
Maybe if I gently bit her…
Leah was taken aback when a russet wolf, double her size and much furrier, jumped over the fence and landed on top of her. She felt his razor-sharp teeth sink into her hind legs before she kicked him off.
Leave now. Jacob ordered, glancing at the six girls to make sure they were okay. When he was satisfied, he quickly jumped back over the fence. Leah jumped over the fence in the opposite direction.
Oh cool it Jacob. I was just having fun. I wasn't really going to bite the lard. I can barely stand hunting as it is.
You're so lucky Holly's mother didn't see us. It could have caused our pack a lot of trouble if there were 'wild wolf' rumors going around. Bu don't be mistaken, you're still in a lot of trouble.
Whatever bossman. Leah thought before she morphed back into a human. A tree covered her naked body as she bent down to open her small book bag. She pulled the casual blue dress over her head and placed her white flip-flops on her feet. She pulled her tiny book bag over her shoulder as she walked over to the empty park's parking lot.
Leah looked around as she pulled the door open to her white SUV. Really, what could Jacob do? Leah pulled the door close.
"Boo."
Leah held back a scream as she snapped her head around. Jacob casually leaned back on her backseat as he stared at her.
"It's not always fun to get the shit scared out of you, huh?" Jacob asked, crossing his strong arms over his chest. Leah rolled her eyes as she turned back around and started her car.
"I thought we were done discussing this?" She asked, looking at him in her review mirror for a moment as she backed out of the parking lot.
"Actually, I think there's a lot to discuss. Good thing it's a nice long drive to my house," Jacob smiled up at Leah's review mirror.
"I'm not driving you home," Leah snarled through gritted teeth. A shiver ran down her back when she heard Jacob chuckle.
"Oh yes you are."
When Leah didn't respond, Jacob grinned, "So first topic up for discussion: my bike."
"You mean the white one with the pink glittery material hanging from the handlebars? I haven't seen it," Leah said innocently as she turned on her blinker to switch lanes.
"You know that's Claire's bicycle. It's sitting in my garage because I'm fixing the brakes on it," Jacob growled, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment. Leah laughed.
"No need to get so defensive, Jacob."
"Me get defensive? Have you forgotten about your whole charade this past week and a half?"
"It isn't a charade!"
"Sure, sure."
"That is an example of why I don't tell you things! You totally blow me off because you don't care! Then you have the audacity to ask what's bothering me when I'm not little miss sunshine!"
"You were never little miss sunshine, Leah."
Leah pulled over to the side of the road and slammed on her brakes. The both of them rocked forward from the impact before gravity shoved them back into their seats. Leah whipped her head around to stare at Jacob.
"I'm not like Renesmee at all, Jacob! I never will be! I'm Leah and you're just going to have to deal with that!"
"Why are you putting Renesmee in this?! She has nothing to do with what's bothering you!" Then Jacob's expression changed, "Or is there a reason why you brought her name up?"
Leah turned back around, avoiding Jacob's look, "No!"
"By the way, I do care! It's just hard to keep up with you! I swear you're bipolar! One day you're perfectly fine and the next you're pissed off at the world!"
"Well I have my reasons to be pissed!" Leah argued, her shoulders rising with tension.
"Maybe you should explain those reasons so we're all on the same page! It would help us all in the long run!" Jacob's angry, booming voice was so loud that the SUV nearly shook.
"I don't need to explain myself to you, Jacob Black!"
"Apparently you do, Leah Clearwater! You're driving me up the freaking wall!"
"Get out of my car!" Leah shouted, unbuckling her seat belt. The brunette then leaned over and opened Jacob's door.
"I would hate to drive with a crazy person behind the wheel anyway! You know, you're only making things harder for yourself! I don't know why on earth I'm trying to help you!" Jacob yelled back as he got out of Leah's car, "And I want my motorcycle back in my garage tomorrow morning!"
Leah didn't bother to answer him as she slammed the door in his face. She gave Jacob a tight smile before she sped off.
Damaged,
Damaged
I thought that I should let you know
That my heart is
Damaged
So Damaged
And you can blame the one before
So how you gonna fix it, fix it, fix it
XXXXX END OF FLASHBACK XXXXX
As I reflect back on the memories, I realize that taking my frustration out on Jacob is partially wrong. Although he's the main reason why my feelings are running haywire, it doesn't give me a right to treat him like the scum of the earth.
I was acting immature. I was acting like a schoolgirl who had a crush- never mind.
I was stubborn and I didn't want to believe that Jacob wanted to understand and help me. I didn't want to believe that he actually cared and that he didn't have the intention to hurt me. Sam Uley sure didn't give a damn how I felt when he left me for Emily, so why would Jacob when he…left me… to be with pretty Renesmee?
I felt my heart swell when one last memory filled my head. I wasn't even sure how I remembered it, but I miraculously did. It was the last time I saw Jacob and we were, at least I believed, still not on talking terms. I was in a rough situation and when Jacob saw me, I expected him to laugh bitterly, tell me 'serves you right', and then walk away. I deserved that.
It caught me off guard when he did something I didn't expect and something I especially didn't deserve.
XXXXX FLASHBACK XXXXX (Jacob's POV)
I could almost clearly hear my father's voice in my head. 'Walk it off son,' he would say, 'especially since I can't.' I decided to take the advice and I let my anger drain out of me as I paced back and forth across the living room.
The usually occupied, small house was currently very empty. My father decided to pay a visit to one of his childhood friends that lived out in Alabama and he wouldn't be back for a good two weeks. I felt some of my anger deplete, I was happy that my dad was finally able to get out of this stuffy house for more than a day. He needed the vacation.
The only person who tended to visit anymore was Seth. The others were busy being with their imprint mate (as Seth liked to call them) or they were busy with simple things like work or school. It didn't bother me, Seth and I usually played videogames anyway. There were two other reasons why Seth came over frequently besides just wanting to hang out and they were: 1) he didn't want to be in constant company with Charlie and his lovesick mom and 2) he wanted to get away from his obnoxious sister.
His sister, Miss Leah Clearwater herself, was the reason why I was 'walking it off.' Leah had never tested my patience and tolerance level as much as she has these past two weeks, including when we first hated each other. Her recent behavior has been very strange and very out of this world. It drives me to the extreme too because she won't tell me what kind of stick has been shoved up her ass!
I don't have an idea of what her problem is. I don't know if it has to do with Sam or if it has to do with her mom's new boyfriend. All I know is that she better stop treating me like a damn dog!
I know what you people are thinking and it's not funny.
Although Leah is the reason why I'm going berserk, there's still a part of me that cares deeply about the twit. I want to help resolve her troubles so she can bitch at someone else for a change. This soft spot I have for her is tremendously minuscule but it still exists.
Since Leah won't voluntarily tell me what or who was throwing her off her rocker, I'm just going to have to sit her down and force it out of her. I wasn't faster than her, but I sure as hell was stronger.
And better-looking.
I smirked as I grabbed my keys off the living room table. My hand was on the doorknob when I heard the phone ring. I battled the decision of answering or not answering the phone during the first two rings. I gave in on the third ring and picked the phone up.
"Hello?"
"Yo, Jacob? It's Seth."
"Oh hey. I was just about to come over and pay a visit. What's up? You sound worried," I asked as I let the phone rest of my shoulder. I could hear Seth's breath hitch up and my stomach turned.
"Set-"
"It's Leah. Mom's over at Charlie's for the night. Mom has this rule where we have to be home at eleven if she isn't home or if we aren't doing an important pack meeting. Leah left the house at seven and I know there isn't a pack thing going on since I'm evidently talking to you. I'm worried, Jacob. I know Leah has the tendency to bend the rules a bit but it's almost 12:30 in the morning."
"Do you have any clue where she might be?" I asked, trying to keep my voice calm and even. I didn't need to scare or upset Seth even more.
"No-Uh-Wait," I heard a ruffling noise, "Hey, what's today's date?"
"The 19th," I answered after a moment. I heard a fairly relieved sound from the other side of the phone.
"I'm in her room and I just found this flyer. I'm pretty sure she's at this Stephen guy's party," Seth said, "Do you think I should head over there?"
"I'll take care of it, okay Seth? I'll call you as soon as I have your sister in my grasp." I waited for Seth to give the okay before I shut the phone off. I was out the door a second later.
It didn't take me long to get to Stephen's. Thanks to my amazing senses, I could hear the upbeat dance music from miles away. I, unfortunately, could also smell the hard liquor. I felt a headache coming on already. I glanced at the party scene as I parked my black truck in the closest available space.
Surprised the cops haven't shown up yet.
I got out of my car, shut the door, and locked it. I wasn't going to take any chances with crazy, under-aged, drunk teenagers around.
I wasn't even ten feet from my car when the first victim threw herself at me. Her drunken breath surrounded me as she locked her long arms around my neck, "Take me! I'm yours!"
"What the fuck, Lauren! You slut! He's mine!" Another girl yelled, tossing the girl aside. She turned around and moved her backside up my pelvis area, "You like that?"
The girls then started to multiply. Two other girls came up and the four got into a heated 'He's mine!' battle. I slyly freed myself from the girls and made my way into the house. I didn't have a problem getting in.
The loud music shook the framed pictures on the walls and my eyes watered from the instant smoky haze. I coughed and shook my head when someone offered me a hit of their blunt. I then strolled into a much clearer but much more destroyed living room. The living room was cramped to the maximum. An empty bowl of chips and empty soda bottles sat on top of the large, rectangular living room table.
Leah wasn't anywhere in sight, which was really irritating. I didn't want to stay here any longer than necessary. After standing motionless for two minutes, I finally spotted one of Leah's acquaintances (Leah rarely considered anyone as her 'friend'), I felt my spirits lift.
"Ruth, have you seen Leah around?" I yelled over the loud music so she could hear me. Her heavily outlined eyes searched the room before she parted her black painted lips to speak. Her lip ring glittered in the light, "Nope, at least not since she got smashed."
"How smashed is smashed?"
"She drunk two beers, had four shots of vodka, downed a bottle of Bacardi, and then I saw her sipping a peach margarita," Ruth answered simply, as if it was nothing.
Oh no…
I felt Ruth poke me in the side as I groaned. I looked at her and saw that she was pointing up at the top of the staircase. I lifted my eyes to see Leah with no alcoholic beverages in her hand. Thank God.
"Whoo!" Leah hollered from the top of the stairs.
She was dressed in a pair of low-cut, tight, dark blue jeans and had a hot pink top that resembled a bikini but with attached loose-fitting long-sleeves. The pink material tied under her almost-revealed breast and cut off, showing her entire stomach. She had a neon green ring pierced in her naval and she sported a pair of white high-heels. Her makeup wasn't natural looking but at the same time, it wasn't over-loaded. Her brunette hair was straightened.
Basically, from the neck up, she looked pretty. The rest of her looked like trash.
My eyes narrowed as Leah straddled the stairs' banister. I was too late to realize what she was about to do. Leah, although she was smashed, somehow gracefully slid down the stairs' banister. When she was on the first floor, I started to make my way over to her. Two guys, however, beat me to the punch and guided Leah to the dining room table.
"How about a little dance?" I heard one guy ask as the other cleared the table by knocking the empty containers to the floors. Leah shrugged and nodded, "Sure because I lic-lic-lick like a lollipop!"
"Alright," The guy who asked her the 'favor' said. Then he grabbed her by the waist and placed her on the table. I saw him nod over to the DJ. Everyone gathered in a huge circle around the table as a new beat started to play.
Oh
shit, shake that ass ma, move it like a gypsy
Stop, woah, back it
up, now let me see your hips SWING
Stop, woah, back it up, now let
me see your hips SWING
Now drop it looooow and let me see your
hips SWING
Down to the floooor now let me see your hips SWING
Down
to the floooor now let me see your hips SWING
It didn't surprise me that Leah was a good dancer. She worked her lean body in all the right ways and had natural rhythm. She played with her hair a lot when she danced, despite the length of it. It was hard to look away because she hit every beat almost perfectly.
I zapped back into reality when I saw her hands reach for the tie on her shirt. I saw a group of guys nudge and high-five each other from the corner of my eye.
Not on my watch. I thought as I placed myself on top of the table. The girls in the room immediately got really excited and got as close as the guys.
"Give me a booty shake!" I heard one of them shout. I heard the girls squeal as I gave them a pathetic attempt of a 'booty shake' in order to shut them the hell up. I looked over to see Leah glaring at me. She was pissed that I stolen her spot light. Good.
"Show's over!" I called to the crowd around us. There was a bunch of sighs and 'what the fuck!'s but I disregarded them. When Leah tried to jump off the table, I grabbed her arm.
"Hold it. You're coming with me."
"No I'm not!" She shouted, trying to push me away with her other hand. I rolled my eyes as I let her go. A look of confusion crossed her face as I got off the table.
I then slammed my arm across the back of her already weak knees. She instantly lost balance and I caught her in my arms before she hit the table. I continued to cradle her regardless of her screaming protests. I ignored all the looks and hurried over to my car. This was humiliating.
I nearly threw Leah in my truck as soon as I unlocked and opened the passenger side door. I automatically locked the door again until I got on the driver's side. I unlocked the door and got in. Leah was banging on the window as she continued to have a tantrum. She was drunk enough to not understand how to unlock her door.
The small headache I already had increased.
"Let me go, Jacob! I want to go back to the party!"
"You've done enough partying for the night, Leah," I mumbled as I turned the car on and reversed out of my parking space. She spun her head furiously around to face me as we drove away.
"I hate you!!"
"You're so endearing when you're drunk. Now be a good girl and be quiet as I call your brother," I commanded as I got my cell phone out of my pocket. She only continued to scream. I pulled the car over to the side of the road and put it in park. I reached over and moved Leah beside me. I wrapped one arm around her waist and arms to hold her down.
I placed the phone to my shoulder after I dialed her house number. I then clamped my hand over her loud mouth. I made sure she was still able to breathe properly out of her nose before my attention went back to the phone call.
"Hello? Jacob?" I heard Seth ask.
"Yeah bud, it's me. I have Leah with me and she's fine-"
"Oh thank you Jacob!" Seth interrupted, "You'll be here soon then?"
"Actually, I think I'm going to look over her at my house," Leah's head frantically moved back and forth as I told Seth this, "She's not feeling so well-"
"Is she drunk?" Seth interrupted again. He didn't sound mad.
I sighed, "She's completely shit-faced. I think it would be easier if I just took care of her over at my house. I don't want your mom to walk in and see the state her daughter's in. I'll have her back over in the morning."
"Okay," Seth replied softly and then joked, "Don't be too hard on her."
"I'll try," I promised before I hung up. I let go of Leah completely as I turned the car back on. She scooted back to her side of the car but surprisingly, didn't bother to yell. She was probably in shock that she was going to spend the night at my house. The car filled with silence and it lasted for a while.
"You hungry?" I asked as I pulled into a burger joint that was unexpectedly still opened. I placed my foot on the brakes when I was in front of the drive-thru menu.
"Not really. Only a little bit," she whispered, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared out the passenger side window. I shrugged and turned when the lady asked me what I wanted to order.
"Yeah. Um- Can I have four double cheeseburgers, a large fry, and two large cokes?" I ordered automatically. I paused and glanced at Leah from the corner of my eye. She murmured something that sounded like 'I don't know, can you?'
I glimpsed back at the menu.
What the hell do you order a drunk girl without her getting sick?
"Anything else?" The lady asked.
"Yeah, throw a fruit cup thing in there too," I said after a moment.
"That'll be 12.48. Please pull up to the next window." I pulled up, paid the lady, and got my food. I saw Leah flinch when I placed the bag between us.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"The smell is strong," she complained as she rolled down her window for fresh air.
Shit. I didn't think about that.
Leah's hand reached for the radio. She increased the volume when the song 'Thriller' came on, "How ironic. It suits us perfectly."
I laughed. Leah and I then started to sing along with Michael Jackson. A smile reached her face and I couldn't help but smile myself. The happy moment didn't last very long. Her smile faded quickly and I saw her face flush.
"I don't feel so good, Jacob."
Crap…
"Put your head between your knees and just focus on breathing," I instructed. I really didn't know what I was supposed to say, but I was hoping I was saying the right thing. A moan escaped Leah's lips and I let my free hand run through her hair to sooth her.
"We're almost home. You can do all the barfing you want there."
I heard her laugh, "This is so pathetic. I'm never going to drink again."
"Sure, sure," I mocked.
"Shut up," she replied as I parked my car in the driveway. I got out and walked over to where Leah was. I opened the door to see her sitting up straight.
"Can you walk?"
"Yeah," Leah wobbled out of the car and I grabbed the fast-food bag. When Leah attempted to put one foot in front of the other, she stumbled. I placed the bag down and got in front of her. When she tried to walk again, she tripped. Her face smashed into my chest.
She looked up at me. She giggled as I placed my hands on her waist, "I guess I can't."
I draped an arm around her small frame and we made our way slowly into my house. As soon as we successfully sat down on the couch, I grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. An 'I Love Lucy' rerun was on.
"I'm going to get the fast-food bag out of the car. Stay here," I said, although I knew she really couldn't go anywhere else on her own. It took me less than a minute to come back. I handed Leah her fruit cup and spoon before I started on my own meal. I was half way through my cheeseburger when I saw Leah drop her spoon and place a hand over her mouth.
I was lucky enough to get the toilet seat up before she blew chunks.
"Just get it all out," I soothed, holding her hair up in one hand and rubbing her back with the other. I attempted to give her some privacy by focusing my attention on a picture instead of her.
Leah shied away when she stopped throwing up. I let go as she flushed the toliet and stood up. Leah rinsed her mouth out with mouthwash before she turned to me.
"I can take care of myself," I saw tears starting to form in her eyes and I understood that what she said had more meaning than just being able to take care of herself when she was drunk, "I can take care of my damn self. I don't need anybody. Not my family, not Sam and not you!"
I stood up and placed a hand on her shoulder, "Leah, it's okay to accept someone's help. You don't need to be so independent and alone all the time."
Leah shook her head, "Yes I do or I'll just get hurt again! I rather be alone than deal with that pain!"
I didn't know why but I felt my heart drop when I saw the tears that she desperately tried to hide glide down her cheek. I automatically reached out to wipe her tears away but she smacked my hand.
"Just go away, Jacob! Go away! Go be with Renesmee for all I care!" Leah spat, folding her arms across her chest as if to protect herself from me.
Instead of doing what she said, I reached my arm over her head. I locked the door as soon as it shut.
"I'm not going anywhere," I whispered tenderly, my face inches away from her tear-streaked one.
XXXXX END OF FLASHBACK XXXXX (Leah's POV)
Jacob took such good care of me that night. He put our differences aside and made me his priority. In the morning, he didn't question what I said in the bathroom.
He made sure I was sober enough to walk in my house and greet my anxious family. Seth made it easy for me and lied to my mom. He told her I was spent the night at Ruth's house.
I didn't have any problems except one. The one problem that I'm still trying to answer. Why was Jacob Black making such an immense impact on my life now? Why did I constantly think about him and replay these memories inside my head? How was he able to tie my emotions in such a tangled web? Why does it feel like the old way I use to feel for Sam, but only more?
It was time for confrontation and I knew exactly why. I knew the truth that I didn't want to uncover, except it was uncovered all along.
I liked Jacob Black. There, I admitted it. I freaking liked Jacob Black. I liked the loser a lot too.
I felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders and my heart when I admitted this fact- even if it was just to myself. It felt so good that I wanted to scream the truth from the rooftops- well, not really. Although I was suddenly very comfortable with this realization, I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing.
Especially Jacob. I could never tell Jacob I liked him. It would only make matters worse. He wouldn't leave Renesmee for plain old me, plain old Leah. I put him through hell and back in these past few weeks, and he would be out of his mind if he liked me too. So I simply just couldn't tell him…
Except things weren't that simple. I was going to have to tell Jacob Black. It wouldn't be fair to him or me if I pretended things were normal. I tried that (well at least kinda) and that only complicated things. Jacob can see through the tough mask I put on. How would I explain these last two weeks to him anyway without him finding out the truth? 'Oh yeah, about that. Major PMS dude.' It wasn't going to fly.
"The truth shall set you free." I certainly hope so.
I looked out my window. Gray clouds were still in sight but It wasn't raining yet. I was in the mood for a nice run. I needed the fresh air and I needed to try to clear my mind. I threw on a pair of old jeans and a nice, sea-green sweater. I put on my white running shoes and headed down stairs.
"I'm going out!" I called out to my mom who was busy cooking a fancy meal in the kitchen. I guess Charlie was coming over.
"Will you be home for dinner?" My mom asked, not bothering to turn to face me as she continued to cook.
"Probably not," I grimaced, "Sorry."
"Ah, that's too bad. I guess it's okay. Just be home at 11 sharp. Come home sooner if it starts thundering or call me from somewhere safe," She instructed and I told her 'okay' before I left my house.
I ran in my human form all the way to the woods. It didn't take me very long since I was fast runner. I skidded to a stop when I was about fifty feet into my destination. I peeled my clothes off as I caught my breath. The forest was so relaxing. The soft hymn of crickets was the only sound that echoed off the trees. All the other critters were safe in their homes, preparing for the oncoming storm.
I took off again as soon as I transformed. The dry, colorful leafs crumbled under my gray paws as I ran around the forest. My ears perked at the sound of water. The creek was about a mile off from where I was.
I could stay here forever.
That's not a smart idea. It's going to thunderstorm soon. Quil appeared from behind a tree, his dark eyes on mine.
No shit Sherlock. I joked, laughter bubbling in my throat. Hey Quil.
Hey Leah. Did you finally figure out what's been bothering you?
This was not a topic I wanted to talk about. I wanted to avoid it, but I was also sick of lying to myself and others. Kinda…
Oh. So Jacob did help you out after all, huh?
Jacob. I looked away as I brushed my head against my front leg.
Kinda… I repeated meekly. Quil observed me as my face softened.
Oh Leah. You didn't…
What? I thought defensively.
You're in love with Jacob, aren't you? Quil asked. I snapped my head up.
Screw being honest!
What!? No!
Leah, Jacob might not be able to hear Bella's heartbeat anymore but he can sure as hell hear yours.
What is that suppose to mean!?
He ignored my question and said, I won't tell Jacob about your little secret, but you should let him know. The truth shall set you free!
I hated that quote. Go away.
Actually I am. I'm going to go see Claire now. Later! I watched as he ran away.
I gotta get out of this form! I knew I wouldn't be able to control my thoughts much longer. I ran to where the creek was and transformed back into a human. I let my palm hit my forehead when I realized I left my clothes in the beginning of the forest.
"I'll get them on the way back," I muttered as I sat down on the cold earth. A shiver ran down my back as I hugged my knees to myself, "I'm alone anyway."
And I always will be. Jacob is just going to feel sorry for me when I tell him how I feel. Besides, Renesmee wants him as much as he wants her. He wants and needs her, not me. I guess I can allow the little bloodsucker to have him since he's happy with her, since he loves her. Face it Leah- he loves Renesmee. He does not love Leah Clearwater. The tears that ran down my cheek were uncontrollable and I hated it. Why am I beating myself up about this? I guess I truly am pathetic. No wonder why Sam left me so easily. I choked out a sob as I placed my head on top of my knees.
"Leah?"
I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard his voice. I wiped the tears from my face and hugged my knees as close to my chest as I could. I was naked for crying out loud! It wasn't as if Jacob hadn't seen me naked before but I found it unfair that he still had a pair of khaki, board shorts on.
I was vulnerable physically and emotionally.
"Damn it Jacob! You can at least give me a warning! How long have you been standing there?" I asked, my green eyes set in a glare.
"Long enough," He answered, walking over and sitting next to me. He wasn't bothered by my lack of clothes. My eyes grew as wide as saucers as a possibility hit me.
"Did you transform earlier? Did you hear Quil and I?" I asked, rushing the words together so fast that it sounded like one big word. Jacob raised a dark eyebrow as a confused expression set on his face.
"No. I was taking a walk to clear my head and I heard you crying," I blushed, "Why? Did something important happen?"
I struggled with honesty, "Yes."
He waited for me to say something, "Are you going to tell me what happened?"
"No."
"Why not? I need to know what goes on, Leah. I am the leader of the pack."
"No you don't," I murmured.
"What the hell? Are you listening to yourself? Yes I do."
I stood up. I felt the anger pumping in my veins and I started walking away. I had to get away before the truth slipped out, "It's not your business to know!"
"It is my business! Leah, come back here and tell me right now what went down! Tell me right now what the fuck has been bothering you all this time, or I swear I'll…"
I looked over my shoulder to stare at him. My eyes danced furiously with anger, "Or what, Jacob Black? Hm? You gonna send me over your knee?"
"Don't test me, Leah Clearwater, or you will find yourself in an uncomfortable position," he growled, the ring of promise in his tone.
"Ooo very scary," I mocked although it really was. I felt my heart jump when I saw him get up and advance toward me. I wasn't going to run away, although I knew I could outrun him. I wasn't a coward.
"What did you and Quil talk about?"
I should've kept my damn mouth shut.
I turned to face him and yelled, "Nothing!"
"Tell me the truth!" He hollered although he was standing right in front of me. His body was shaking with anger and I knew he could transform any minute. He was fighting from doing so.
Damn it. Damn it. Damn it!
I gave in and I let the truth slip. It should set me free after all.
"You want to know what Quil and I talked about? You want to know why I been so uptight lately? We talked about you and how I freaking felt about you, okay?!" I could feel my heartbeat hammering in my chest and I knew he could hear it too, just like Quil said. "I like you Jacob Black! That's the truth that you so desperately wanted to know!"
I didn't feel free. I actually felt heart-broken from the look Jacob was giving me. See? I was right. He just felt sorry for me. Nothing changed.
I shook my head as Jacob sat on the ground.
"Leah…"
"Just fuck it! Forget what I said!" I turned but halted when his hand wrapped around my wrist. He pulled me onto his lap and I didn't fight him. I continued to ramble on as he studied my face, "I mean, it doesn't matter and it surely doesn't change things. You have Renesmee just like how Sam has Emily. I know imprinting can't be helped and I'm not mad. I'm just really fucking sad," I bowed my head as I choked out the last part.
I expected an "I'm sorry Leah" or maybe a "That's the reason why I been putting up with your crap for these last few weeks?" but I didn't expect laughter. His warm chuckle caught me off guard and I tilted my head to look up at him.
"Silly girl," he teased as he placed a loose strand of my hair behind my ear, "I didn't imprint on Renesmee. Who told you that? Besides, I barely have the patience to put up with you," he teased, "Do you really think I can wait around- even if it would only be 4 or 5 years- for her to grow up?"
Instead of answering his question, I blinked up at him. He never imprinted on Renesmee? "I'm going to kill my brother."
"Don't. It wasn't your brother's fault. I am constantly around because I do care about and love Nessie a lot."
"See? There's still a possibility of you imprinting on her when she grows up. She's going to look exactly like Bella and you're going to fall in love all over again," I argued. Jacob shook his head.
"I highly doubt that I'm going to imprint on her," He smirked, "It would be difficult to imprint on someone else's mate anyway."
I gave him a puzzled look.
"Embry imprinted on Renesmee. I'm usually with Embry when he visits Renesmee so things won't be awkward between the parents and the future boyfriend. Seth probably assumed it was me because I visit the Cullens more frequently than Embry."
"Oh," I couldn't think of anything else to say for a moment, "Okay, so you won't imprint on 'Nezzie.' What if you imprint on someone else?"
"Well that's where I did some research. It was really hard to find because girl shape-shifters are so rare. Anyway, I found out from the elders that girl shape-shifters are unable to imprint. When the girl shape-shifter truly falls in love, she passes the trait of being unable to imprint to her partner," Jacob shrugged, "I guess it has to do with fairness and order."
Comfort and relief washed over my body and I couldn't help but smirk, "Who said I fell in love and you were my mate?"
"For your case, let's just say we're talking about the future to avoid complications," Jacob responded, a smile reaching his face.
"Okay."
"Still, retaliating on an assumption is wrong," Jacob stated, clearly talking about what a bitch I've been and what I made him put up with because I thought he imprinted on 'Nessie.'
I loved how he nicknamed the creature after the Loch Ness Monster.
"I wasn't retaliating! I was coping with my feelings!" I disagreed, sticking my chin up at him.
"Sure, Sure," He let go of my wrist to caress my chin. His thumb traced my jaw and my body reacted in ways I didn't want it to.
"So when we're you planning to tell me about this little crush you had on me? I'm sure this isn't what you planned," He whispered, his hot breath hitting me and making shivers run down my spine. He grinned.
"Soon," I answered honestly, "But the cat's already out of the bag."
"Nope."
"What do you mean no?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I like you too, Leah Clearwater," He said before he kissed me. I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around his neck. His free hand rubbed the small of my back. His taste was mouth-watering and I didn't want the kiss to end.
But it did.
"Now the cat's out of the bag," Jacob grinned, letting go of my face, "Why didn't you tell me you liked me sooner? Hm?"
"Once burnt, twice shy," I smirked as he laughed.
"That's true," he said as the sound of thunder rumbled close by. I mockingly leaned back and watched as Jacob leaned down to kiss me again. I got up before he was able to.
"Haha," I teased, looking over my shoulder to stick my tongue out at him. Jacob stood up.
I jumped when his hand smacked my ass, "I told you not to test me. Now go put on some clothes. I don't want anyone to see my girl naked," He pointed to a tree that my clothes sat in front of.
My girl. I liked the sound of that.
I ambled over to the tree and started to put my clothes on, "You could have told me my clothes were over here earlier, you know."
"I wanted to enjoy the sight," He replied and I looked away as my cheeks colored. Curse him.
I glanced back when I was done getting dressed and saw Jacob standing right beside me. He held out his hand, "Ready to go?"
"Yep," I answered, placing my hand in his. We paced (hey, a thunderstorm was coming) in silence for a couple minutes. I then tilted my head to look up at him.
"Jacob?"
"Yes, Leah?" We came to a halt.
"I never guessed that it would end up this," I said softly, a smile growing on my face. He smiled back, "But I'm glad it did."
"Me too," he whispered before kissing me once more.
XXXXX END XXXXX
Okay so that was my first attempt at a Twilight Fic! Did you like it? Did you not like it? Let me know in a review, please!! Thank you for reading! I appreciate it!
Chibi Neko-Chan2