Broken Glass, a vampire knight fanfic

"Zero

"Zero?"

A cold breeze flashed by—

It looked beautiful…

—and Yuuki looked around the hallway. "Zero?" she called again—

…like stars whirling down from the heavens.

—because no matter where she went, it always seemed to—

He heard screams and a panicked voice

—lead right—

scream his name,

—back—

"Zero!"

—to—

while the shards dug into his skin.

—him.

Broken Glass

He looked at the girl tending to his fever, her hands coolly and quickly skimming across his forehead. She looked a little troubled, biting her lips nervously as she grabbed another towel and placed it on his head.

"Yuuki…" he murmured, his voice low and scratchy from not being used.

"Zero?" she looked at him, her eyes glowed brightly. "Are you ok? Should I get you something?"

Zero glanced at her apathetically, noting how her hair was messy and her clothes crumpled. She must have been sitting by his bed the entire time.

"No…" he closed his eyes. "I doubt you could help me anyways."

"Hey!" she frowned at him. "That's not fair! I worked hard to keep you healthy."

He just turned his head away.

"Fine, be that way," she glowered angrily. "I'm going to eat." With that, she huffed out of the room.

Unknown to her, Zero watched her figure as she left. He sighed lightly when he noticed the small bowl of fruit on his table.

It was harder and harder to ignore Yuuki now. He tried to avoid her, ignore her—not get close to her. The demon that lurked within—the one that killed and slaughtered and destroyed his life—was just waiting to leak out.

And he'd rather not have anyone there when it happened.

Less bonds mean less people to hurt.

It wasn't too long after that he experienced the first attack. Yuuki's neck sent a shock through his skin, an electric, tingly feeling that set his blood on fire. He wondered how it'd feel, to send his teeth into her pale skin and just taste that—

No. He will not think of that. Not now. Not ever. Not her.

He promised that he'd never take her, never sink his fangs into her.

(Promises are meant to be broken)

"Zero! Come on, let's hurry!" Yuuki glanced at the older boy before she headed down the street at a quick pace. She stopped suddenly in front of a shop, staring at the merchandise for a moment before looking back at him.

"Zero…can you wait here for a moment? I promise to be back soon!" she pleaded.

"…" he turned his head to the side, not replying but not moving either. Taking his silent approval, Yuuki quickly scampered into the shop.

He looked at the ground as he waited, thinking carefully. It was true, what Kaname had told him.

Yuuki had a control over him. Chains that bounded Zero to her, keeping him tied to her so that even in the most dangerous of moments, he would try to keep her safe.

To think that he was so attached to her that it was the only reason he was kept alive was a horrible feeling. One that made him feel as though there was no other worth in his life than to be keeping Yuuki alive.

He was being used.

And he wasn't sure if he wanted to keep it that way.

A popsicle was stuck in front of him and he blinked.

"For you," Yuuki said, looking away. "I owed you something, so I thought that I should get you one."

Zero looked at her other hand pointedly and she flushed. "Fine, I wanted one too."

Slowly, he took the cold treat, all the while grimacing.

"Hey! I spent money on that! Stop grimacing!"

He grimaced again, and she pouted. "You're so…MEAN sometimes!" She stomped ahead of him.

He would keep protecting her. Not so that he could live. Just because she was Yuuki and didn't know better, trusting those who shouldn't be believed.

(he wanted to protect that smile and these small moments)

-x-

There's something about you now

That I can't quite figure out-

Everything she does is beautiful

Everything she does is right

Zero felt dirty. No matter how hard he tried to wash himself, no matter how much soap and water he used, he still felt dirty. The stench of blood wouldn't leave him.

It stayed, like that time when his family died around him.

(but that time, small, warm fingers helped him get rid of the dirt and the ugly scars)

He finally gave up after his third shower. Turning off the water, he stepped out of the shower and looked at the mirror.

He saw himself, Zero, the human, the vampire, the one-who-tried-to-hurt-her.

CRACK! The mirror broke when his fist came in contact with it.

Why her? Why did he have to bite her first? He never wanted to—she was Yuuki, the one that had to be protected, the one that saved him, the one that should never ever be hurt—and yet, he hurt her.

He tasted her blood. He bite into her skin and drained her until she couldn't remain standing.

He let her experience vampires all over again, just when she was getting over that last scare.

The worst thing, though? Zero wanted more. Her blood was addicting, like a drug, and his body craved for more.

It was a disgusting feeling he had and he wished that it remained hidden.

(Don't come near me)

The white-haired vampire looked at her back as Yuuki ran off to Kaname. It was always like that.

Zero would be somewhere doing something with her, but the second Kaname-sama appeared Yuuki would immediately leave.

Running to him.

It hurt. Not being able to keep her eye for longer than a moment, not being able to keep her heart for longer than an instant.

Not being able to receive her love.

It never belonged to him in the first place, anyways. Ever since she was five, she was always his. Even when Zero came into the picture, even when Yuuki tried everything and anything to keep him by her side—and that was the biggest slash on his heart, for when she pleading and finding ways to keep him in the Day Classes, keeping him with her, he thought that maybe she cared. That maybe she loved him, not as much as Kaname, but maybe enough that she would try to stay with him.

(everyone leaves in the end)

In the end, though, she chose Kaname. She always did. All of those promises were nothing to her.

He was nothing to her.

She's dressed up and Zero knows that this will be one of the last moments he has with her.

The monster in him has become more and more active, trying to take over completely. Soon enough, he'll fall completely and need to be killed.

He won't let himself to fall until the end, though. Until he watches her end up safely with Kaname, he won't allow it.

She'll never love him. Not the way he wants, and never the way he needs.

Instead, she'll just shower him with friendship, with hugs and gentle touches—things that could mean everything but instead mean nothing.

It's ok, though. The fact that she's even near someone like him is enough. He's ruined plenty lives as it is.

(oh, brother, how long were you in pain?)

Zero doesn't deserve this friendship, this feeling of flying and falling that makes him think that life is worthwhile. He doesn't deserve it at all and to want something more is like wanting the moon. He can't have it and he understands that.

Yuuki walks to him, nervous, and he gives her a small smile.

At least he can have these small things. They are more than enough.

"I'm nervous, Zero," the brunette says, chewing her lips lightly.

"…" he looks at her silently and at her large dress.

"I don't know…am I ready to get married?"

That's what the day was all about, of course. She was about to get married to him, to her precious Kaname-sama. He was going to be at the wedding, of course, because she forced and threatened until he agreed.

"Zero, maybe…maybe I'm not ready to get married…" she looked at him desperately now. Her eyes were wide and something in them screamed, Take me away. Take me with you.

There was temptation to agree and take her with him. Take her to a place where they could be alone, together and forever. A place where he wouldn't have to watch her laugh with Kaname, dance with him, kiss him, look at him with love-filled eyes.

"You love him, right? Why else are you doing this?" he looked at her disdainfully as he replied. "Are you telling me that all of that is just for show?"

She smiled softly. "Yes, that's true…"

"Then go, already. Stop being stupid."

"Hey!" she pouted, but then she gave him a hug. "Thanks…"

He stood still in her grip. True, he could very well take her away, but he knew she would be happier with Kaname. That's who she wanted. He'd make sure she got him.

Firmly, he'd push her into Kaname's arms and take his leave. As long as Yuuki was happy, he wouldn't mind letting this happen.

Everything was for her.

-x-

Yuuki looked around her, clenching her fists with worry. Please, don't let anything go wrong today.

The wedding was going fine, everything perfect. Her father—to her, he'd always be a father—was there, Kaname (her love) was there, the vampires were there, Zero—

She wasn't sure what to think of Zero. Zero was Zero. Her friend. Her classmate. Her annoying partner.

Her…

She didn't love him….

(No. Not love. Never love. Love was for Kaname-sama.)

He was just…there.

(Always there. Turn around, he'd be there. Falling down, he'd catch her.)

Zero was…was a best friend. Very close.

(Closer than she thought. So close, he was a part of her.)

Maybe, had Kaname-sama never been there, she might have loved Zero. She had toyed with that idea for a while, when she was younger, but always tossed it away. It'd make things awkward between then.

Besides, who cares about what-ifs and could-have-beens? Tomorrows that'd might-have-passed?

It didn't matter, because she was in love with Kaname-sama and Zero was never in the mood for any love. Surely he'd find someone eventually!

Her stomach was a knot of worries, and she refused to decide if that thought added another one.

It wouldn't due to think of it.

(Her chest tightened slightly, and she wondered if she was making a mistake again)

-x-

It all happened so fast. The vampires…there was an attack and all of a sudden, Yuuki's perfect wedding was destroyed.

Seeing the enemy, Kaname placed her for safe-keeping near Zero before rushing out to get rid of the uninvited guests.

She didn't like that, though. She didn't like having to be brushed aside, as though she couldn't hold her own in a fight. She could. And she'd prove it.

Running upstairs, she took the best route in order to get to her room the fastest. Her weapon was there—there was no way she'd carry it during her wedding. As she ran, she noticed that the guests were struggling to defeat their attackers. They were winning—slowly, though. At least they were winning, though.

Turning back to the corridor, her brown eyes widened as she realized that three vampires surrounded her while she was distracted. There was one in-front of her, one behind her, and then one more to a side. Frantically, she looked around, but there was no room to run.

"Yuuki!" Zero cried out, as he appeared from nowhere. His eyes were wild and dangerous, and he instantly shot on of the vampires while tackling another. The last vampire turned to Zero too, and Yuuki was left alone.

"Zero?" she murmured, before rushing to her room. There was no way she'd let him fight three vampires by himself. "Where is it?" she muttered, digging through a pile of clothes. "Where?"

Her hands felt something hard and she sighed with relief as she found the weapon. "Now I can help—"

She froze as she heard a crashing sound.

"ZERO!" she screamed, rushing out of her room. Please don't let him be hurt. Please…

She looked around the empty hallway, calling out his name softly. She turned to the window and gasped. The glass was jagged around the edges as something had hurled through it. Hearing the shouts, she looked down.

"Zero?" she breathed, eyes wide as she saw a still figure on the ground.

"Zero!" she gasped a little louder, hurtling down the stairs at breakneck speed. She leaped over obstacles, her heart pounding hard as she came to terms with what had happened.

Zero was hurt. He fell out the window. He was bleeding. He was surrounded by crystal and shouldn't he be immune to those things? He's a vampire but—

"ZERO!" she yelled, approaching his body. She knelt down, ignoring as the small shards dug into her skin. "ZERO!"

His eyes slowly opened a little and he gave the impression of smiling. "Y…Y…"

"Zero," she let out a relieved breath. He was ok and fine and—

"Yuuki…" his eyes slowly started to close and his breathing shallowed out.

"Zero! Don't leave me! You promised!"

"Ahh…but you left me first…"

"What? What are you saying?"

"…" Zero closed his eyes. He was slowly dying; after all, he shot himself with the gun a few minutes ago. He opened them again and looked up into her worried brown eyes. Yuuki would be fine, he knew it, but he couldn't help wanting to have a little bit of her to himself. A little bit that would always be sad and misswantwish for him.

Zero and Yuuki were like broken glass. No matter how hard he tried, they could never fit perfectly together, never become something whole. Maybe there was a time that they could have, but Kaname would never allow it. In the end, the only one she fit in with now was Kaname.

It was ok. He could live with that fact, because he knew he could never make her happy anyways. He was doomed to die from the start—a thing that would make her sad had she loved him.

"I'm bleeding," he pointed at his chest. Yuuki looked and gasped, surprised to see it was a bullet wound.

"Oh no…Zero, did you shoot youself? That's not good. No," she started to panic, looking around frantically.

"I'll go get help," she promised, getting up and starting to run through the halls. Her dress swished around her as she dashed from broken room to broken room.

Please don't let me be too late.

-x-

She watched as he continued to lay there. Zero had been placed onto a white bed, his wounds dressed, and all of the guests had managed to fix up the building from the attack.

He looked weak, surrounded by the white cloth and with pale skin. Her heart beat fast as she realized that he could have died.

He might have disappeared forever and she'd never see him again. Her chest tightened at the thought that Zero leaving, especially when she realized that he would do so eventually. After all, he was slowly dying anyways, with his vampire status…

"Yuuki," a hoarse voice spoke, startling her from her thoughts.

"Zero! Don't speak, go back to sleep," she ordered, "You're weak! You have to rest and get your energy and—"

"You still have a wedding to go to, right?" he cut in.

"The wedding can wait!" she retorted.

The wounded vampire started to cough, harshly, and Yuuki headed to his bed to help him. However, he raised a hand, stopping her, and continued to talk.

"You know not everyone can come again. And this was what you've been waiting for."

I can wait longer. She didn't say that, but it was true. She could wait as long as possible. She didn't mind. After all, this was Zero. He was worth more than a wedding with everyone.

"You want this. So go. He's not very patient."

She turned her head and noticed that Kaname was approaching the room. Her heart beat fast, as it always did whenever she saw him, but this time it felt a little different. As though it was beating for a different reason.

"Go," he prodded her, and she started to leave, albeit reluctantly.

"Are you sure?"

"Like I need you hovering around me when I'm trying to sleep."

"That's mean!" she smiled, though, relieved that he was better. She headed off to Kaname, smiling at him. Her lover gently grabbed her hand, and started to lead her back to their wedding ceremony. For some reason, she shivered at his touch.

It felt…different. It felt wrong and she wasn't sure why. This feeling she sometimes got, but usually she could brush it away.

Instead, it stayed persistently.

Kaname didn't notice, luckily. Turning her head, she looked back at Zero's door. She could imagine his pale body, his eyes that stared at her with a feeling she recognized but didn't.

Stop! She felt like crying that. Zero needs me.

"Are you ready?" a sultry voice whispered to her. Her soon-to-be husband looked at her, giving her a soft smile.

"…" she doesn't reply. He stares at her for a moment, before opening the doors and heading in. For a few minutes, she is left outside alone.

"These are foolish thoughts," she whispers quietly. "Foolish and if I wanted to stop this, I should have done so long ago. I…" her voice hitched and she couldn't bring herself to say love, "…really care about Kaname-sama. We'll get married and be happy. Now, I'll go in there and smile, because the bride is always supposed to be happy."

She couldn't stop one last foolish thought before she entered the room, though.

Am I making a mistake?

…

Zero…

…

A/N: Wow, this grew long. Sorry about the wait, Fishy. Hope you liked it, at least!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!

And for those interested, I've started a collection of Yuuki/Zero one-shots for the 24hours community! (I just posted it up too.)

Review?