BEWARE: Tokka Shenanigans Ahead. You Have Been Warned.
"Aang?"
"Yup."
"Katara?"
"We got her good."'
"Suki?"
"Yep. Twice."
Sokka laughed. "I can't believe she didn't suspect us the first time. Anyways, you know what this means? The only person left is…"
"Zuko," they said in unison, grinning evilly to each other.
"What should we do for him?"
Toph shrugged. "We could try setting his room on fire."
"No, he'd be able to put it out. Oh! I know! How about stealing all of his clothes?" Sokka asked her excitedly.
Much to his disappointment, Toph shook her head. "We already did that to Suki. The thrill is gone."
"Yeah I guess you're right," Sokka replied sadly. "We could…lock him in a room with Ty Lee for several hours."
"He'd kill himself."
"Must you ruin all of my great ideas?!"
"Well, if your goal is to kill Zuko, then we should try something more exciting…"
They remained silent for a few moments, until Toph jumped up.
"I know what we're going to do. Let's go."
"But…" Sokka was cut off as Toph grabbed his wrist and yanked him out of the room.
xXxXxXxXx
After four days at sea, Toph and Sokka arrived in the Fire Nation. Toph had gotten seasick on the way, but luckily they were on a ship instead of a submarine this time, so she could puke over the side.
They were currently in the city below the Royal Palace, wearing their Fire Nation disguises so they would not attract too much attention. The last thing they needed was the Firelord being informed about foreign visitors before they even had a chance to prank him.
Hiding behind a corner, Toph pulled Sokka down to the ground. "So this is how it's going to work: I'm going to go beyond the city where there's more open earth and create a giant monster from the ground."
Sokka began fidgeting impatiently. "And what am I going to do?"
"You're going to dress up like Zuko and tell everyone to flee the city because a monster is coming."
Sokka paused. "But…I thought we were going to mess with Zuko…not these people…"
Clearly annoyed that Sokka wasn't seeing her brilliance, Toph slammed her hand against a wall.
"Just…trust me, okay?"
An hour later, their stage was set. Sokka felt completely ridiculous; since Toph couldn't see, he had been forced to put tons of make up on his face, just so he could look somewhat like Zuko. He also despised the long robes that Toph had stolen for him in a local clothing shop, but after looking into a mirror, he had to admit that he did look a lot like his friend. Except…he didn't have that goofy Firelord crown.
Sokka looked everywhere for something that resembled the hairpiece, but he found nothing. He was running out of time; Toph's monster would be appearing any moment now…
Noticing a patch of yellow flowers behind the clothing shop, Sokka picked one of them and stuck it in his hair. Perfect.
Firelord Sokka was ready to go.
Right on cue, a giant brown fiend appeared over the city, and the masses of citizens began screaming in terror. It made no noise, but it was huge. Its earthen arms swung around wildly, and the head shook violently as though it was preparing to eat some people.
Sokka grinned. Toph was a genius.
"Don't worry my fair citizens!" Sokka called out to the panicking people as he appeared from behind a corner.
Immediately, the people stopped screaming looked at him with shock and awe.
"It's Firelord Zuko!" several people cried out as they began bowing to him. Sokka rolled his eyes. Gee, forget the monster; it's time to bow to your great leader!
"Oh quit bowing will you?" He told them irritably. "You all must flee the city at once! I uh…command you to leave! Go uh…that way! I'll face the enemy myself!"
The people cheered Sokka on as he dramatically dashed off to the place where Toph was going to meet him; right in the path of her giant earth creature. Once he was a good distance away, he looked back and saw the crowds charging towards the ships and ferries down by the bay.
"Nice performance, Firelord," Toph appeared from behind him. Sokka turned around and grinned.
"You weren't so bad yourself. I can't wait to see Zuko's reaction to his empty city…"
xXxXxXxXx
"Firelord Zuko, we have a crisis on our hands!"
Zuko sat up from his Pai Sho game with Mai and waited for the messenger to continue.
"Everyone is gone!" the tiny man spat out.
"What?!" Zuko jumped up. "But…what do you mean?"
"The entire city is abandoned! The ships are all missing from the bay as well. One straggler informed me that you had gone to fight the monster!"
"Monster?" Zuko snorted.
The man was so panicked that he was still gasping for breath. "You told them you would take care of it! You told everyone to leave, and now they're gone!"
Zuko stared blankly at the man. "I didn't…wait, I didn't tell anyone to leave!"
Watching from an open vent in the ceiling, Sokka choked back his laughter. If only Toph could see the dumbfounded expression on Zuko's face…
"Did my plan work?" Toph hissed almost inaudibly at Sokka.
Sokka watched as the very distraught Firelord darted out of the room, accidentally slamming the door in his girlfriend's face in the process.
"I think it worked a little too well."
Toph smirked. "Time for Phase Two then…"
xXxXxXxXx
"You there!" Sokka called out from the end of a hallway in the Royal Palace. Toph was currently tracking Zuko through the city, careful to make sure he didn't return to the palace while Sokka was there.
The three servants whirled around to face Sokka. One of them glared suspiciously at Sokka for a moment, making the impersonator too uncomfortable to continue speaking.
"That's not the Firelord," the defiant one said at last.
Sokka scoffed, desperately hoping he wouldn't mess up. "Not the Firelord? Did you miss my coronation? Or are you just being flat out disrespectful to your leader?"
He glared at the servant, trying to look menacing. He was far enough away that the men couldn't look at Sokka closely, but he still needed them to keep their distance.
The man's eyes widened. "No sir…I just…thought you didn't look like yourself…my apologies…"
Sokka smirked as the threesome darted out of sight, and he turned around. Toph had told him to find Zuko's room so Sokka could steal the real Firelord crown, something Zuko never wore unless there was something important going on. His room should be just around the corner…
"Ah!"
Sokka looked down in horror at the person whom he had just knocked to the ground.
"Hello Zuko, I thought you were down in the city?" Mai glared at Sokka as he made a feeble attempt to help her up. Once she was standing, she picked the limp yellow flower off of Sokka's head and examined it. Everything fell into place now.
"Look it was just a joke!" Sokka blurted out as he silently cursed himself for not watching where he was going. Nobody but him and Toph was supposed to know about this…
To his surprised, Mai didn't even look mad. In fact, she seemed mildly amused by the prank.
"Whatever you say, Zuko," she told Sokka as she began walking away.
"Wait!" Sokka darted after her, and Mai did wait, but she looked rather irritated to be forced into this joke.
"I need you to tell me where Zuko's crown is," Sokka told her seriously.
Mai looked confused. "Why?"
"Just tell me," Sokka begged her, looking over his shoulder in case someone else was coming.
Mai sighed. "In his room, the second farthest door back that way. It's under his pillow."
She rolled her eyes at Zuko's predictability. Sokka thanked her and began shuffling away.
"By the way," Mai casually called after him. "Your scar is coming off."
Sokka reached at the smeared makeup and grinned at Mai. "That's okay! I won't need it in a while!"
xXxXxXxXx
"Why would they just leave?" Zuko asked himself. He was alone now; his emergency fleet of airships had departed to bring back the frightened citizens, and Mai was probably back up in the palace waiting for him.
"Zukoooooo…" He heard a low voice call out.
"Who's there?" he yelled out after the voice. "Aang?"
Toph giggled. Her voice sounded like Aang?
"Zukoooooo…"
"Quit it!" Zuko was annoyed now.
"You killed Toph Bei Fong…" Toph called out in her spookiest voice.
"What?! Toph's back in the Earth Kingdom! I haven't seen her in ages," Zuko added sadly.
"Toph wants revenge…" Toph nearly had to choke herself to keep her from laughing and ruining the prank.
"I didn't kill Toph!" Zuko shouted angrily. "She's my friend."
"You must pay now…" Toph hooted as though she really was a ghost. She bent down and slammed the earth, causing a box of earth to form around Zuko.
"Hey! Whoever that is, quit it!"
Toph detected a slight edge in his voice. Fear, perhaps? Grinning to herself, she bended the box so it began moving inward, threatening to crush Zuko. She distinctly heard him trying to firebend his way out, but it was no use.
"No firebending Zuko…that's how you burned her feet…" she let her ghost-like voice trail off, then after a few moments she spoke in her normal voice:
"Zuko, why? Why did you kill me…"
"I didn't!" Zuko yelled even louder, trying to break free of his shrinking prison.
Suddenly, she felt Sokka approaching from behind her.
"Did you get it?" she whispered.
Sokka nodded and handed the crown over.
"Good. What should I do with it?"
"You mean you can metalbend that?"
Ignoring Zuko's yells for help in the background, Toph smirked evilly. "Duh! Now give me some ideas."
"Oh! Bend it into a Water Tribe symbol. That'll drive him crazy!"
After a few quick motions, and some help from Sokka, Toph recreated the fire crown into an ocean waves-crown.
"Perfect," Sokka said, admiring her work.
"Should I let him out now?" Toph jabbed her thumb towards the small box. Just before Sokka could answer, a giant burst of flames erupted from the top and Zuko leaped out, looking flushed with rage. He immediately noticed Toph hiding in the bushes and charged at her.
"I knew it was you!" He yelled furiously at her. Then, he noticed Sokka.
Sokka smiled sheepishly. "Oh, uh…hey Zuko…we found your crown…"
He handed the golden headpiece up to Zuko, who was still staring in horror at Sokka's costume of him.
"So…there was no monster?"
"That was me," Toph told him proudly. "I also got tired of seeing the same old crown on your big ol' head, so I decided to change it a little."
"But you can't see…TOPH!" Zuko glared at her as he noticed the Water Tribe Symbol for the first time.
"No need to thank me," Toph told him sweetly. "So how'd we do? Did we scare you pretty good?"
Zuko thought about clobbering her in the face, but instead he sighed. "Okay, fine…you guys got me. Are you happy now?"
"Yes!" Sokka and Toph high-fived each other and grinned. It was just like old times.
How'd you all like it? If this is popular, then I might find the time to write more Tokka-lulz oneshots. Reviews are greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading