IMPORTANT UPDATE!

People of the internet, in an effort to pay off my student loans and eat food at the same time, I'm going to rewrite this story as an original story. I will be taking this story down April 15th.

"And you have no idea what to get him for Christmas?" Margot asked Shawn as she blew on her coffee to cool it down. They were taking their break inside today. Winter had hit New York City with a vengeance and was dark and freezing outside, with a wind that whipped stinging snow into eyes.

Also both of them were trying to quit smoking. Margot was sick of, as she put it, "paying a CEO with a bathtub bigger than my apartment nearly 5 bucks a pack so that I commit slow… delicious…soothing…suicide". Shawn was trying to quit because Cory hated it and had begun passive aggressively leaving hints. A couple weeks ago Cory had planted full page anti-smoking ads he ripped out of magazines all over the apartment. Shawn had found a picture of a diseased lung wrapped around his shampoo bottle. Tucked under a Tupperware in the fridge, he'd found a picture of an emphysema patient with air tubes wrapped all around her. A couple days after that Cory had drawn a picture on Shawn's pack of cigarettes in Sharpie. It was of a tombstone with the words "If Only I Hadn't Smoked" engraved on it. Subtle, he was not.

"No idea," Shawn replied, "I don't actually know what to get anyone. At least my brother was easy. He's in Nigeria so I just sent him a box full of candy and Mac and Cheese, I'm not sure if he'll actually get it before Christmas or not."

"How long have you and Cory been together now?" Margot asked, stirring her coffee.

"About two months," Shawn answered.

"Hmm…. Maybe you should get him a boyfriendy gift this year," Margot suggested, "You know? Something sexy."

"I don't really want to get anything too. "boyfriendy". I don't know… things haven't really changed that much? We're not so much, boyfriends as we are…exclusive best friends with benefits."

Margot laughed at him, "Okay. I don't know. Maybe a book then."

"I also need to get something for his brother Eric, his sister Morgan, and his parents. I'm really worried about what to get his parents."

"Yeah. I can imagine it's nearly impossible to find a "Sorry I turned your son gay, but Merry Christmas" present," Margot nodded.

"Yeah, it's more of a "Sorry I caused him to divorce the daughter in law you loved, am the reason he isn't moving home, am an aspiring author working in a coffee shop, and that he's dating me, but Merry Christmas" actually," Shawn took a sip of his cocoa, "This is going to be weird. I mean, I always go to the Matthew's for Christmas, but you know-"

"Now you're fucking their son?" Margot grinned.

Shawn blushed, "No… I mean, we're… getting there, it's just…"

"You should get on that," Margot told him, "Literally," she stuck her tongue out at him.

Shawn blushed deeper, "We're taking it a little slow, okay? It's not like there's any hurry, and there's the history and …" Shawn's voice petered out in embarrassment.

"Taking it slow?" Margot demanded, "Haven't you guys already waited, like 20 years? Aren't you all deeply in love or whatever? Plus hasn't it been over a year for you now?"

"Yeah, but now, it's…" Shawn rolled his eyes, "Look, I'm not getting laid, but I am getting some. Okay? Anyway, at least his parents took the news that we're together pretty well, right?"

"Yeah. At least don't have to worry about telling them and finding them a present," Margot agreed, "Have you told Jack?"

"I wrote him a letter a couple weeks ago. It takes a while for mail to get back and forth. I haven't heard back from him yet."

"I'm sure it'll be fine," Margot told him, "So, are you going to ask me about my date with Ting or not?"

Shawn smiled, "Oh right. How was your date with Ting?"

Margot called the guy that often came in to the shop to flirt with her "Ting" because, "His smile is so beautiful it needs a sound effect, like in the commercials". Shawn and Margot had several names for the regulars whose names they didn't actually know. In addition to Ting there was also Eyebrows, a guy who came in every morning to order a blueberry muffin and a small coffee, Fingernails, a large black woman with 2 inch long bright red fake fingernails that she tapped on the counter incessantly until her order was up, Smokes-in-the-Bathroom, and of course Sexy Sweater, who was tall and blond, and always wore tight sweaters that showed off his physique.

Shawn had never met Ting, but a couple days ago Sexy Sweater had given Shawn a receipt with his phone number scribbled beneath his signature yesterday and the words "You're cute" written under that. Shawn had panicked and told Sexy Sweater that he had a girlfriend. He hadn't had the heart to tell Agnes, who had been giving Sexy Sweater a twenty percent discount on anything he ordered. And he hadn't mentioned the incident to Cory, who probably wouldn't have found it funny. Margot had laughed herself sick when Shawn told her about it.

"My date with Ting was awesome," Margot gushed, "He took me for a walk in the park and then to this little hole in the wall Turkish place. He knew the owners and they brought us these tiny cups of bright orange tea free with our meal. Oh! And he's so funny! We stayed after we ate and talked for like, a couple of hours."

Shawn nodded, "D'you go back to his place?"

"Yeah, but just for a cup of coffee," Margot clarified, "He's got a crazy nice apartment. And I got possibly the best good-night kiss I've ever gotten. He did this like, really gentle tug with his teeth at my bottom lip. It sounds weird but it was really sexy."

"Yeah," Shawn smiled and bit his own lip, "Cory does that. It's… yeah," He cleared his throat and kept grinning.

"Look at you!" Margot beamed, reaching across the table and squeezing his hand, "With your big grin just thinking about him. Goddess you're cute."

Shawn giggled, then realized it and slapped a hand over his mouth.

Margot laughed at him, "What was that? What was that sound you just made?"

"I haven't done that since Angela was still the "Purse Girl'," Shawn told her, still red.

"What?"

"In high school I had this two week rule remember? Angela and I broke up after her two weeks but then like a week later I found this purse somewhere with all this stuff in it, that made me think that the owner of this purse and I would be compatible. So, I fell in love with this imaginary "Purse Girl" and carried the purse around looking for the girl it belonged to. It was very Cinderella."

Margot stared at him, "Your life in high school was very very strange, Shawn Hunter."

"Yeah. Only getting stranger," Shawn agreed.

"You'll notice that I'm not teasing you about carrying a purse around your high school."

"Yes. Appreciated," Shawn sighed, "So I take it you're going to see this guy again?"

"Yeah. He said he'd call me when he got off work today," Margot grinned, "Yay!"

Cory was at his and Shawn's apartment, packing. Well, mostly panicking, but trying his best to throw some clothes in a suitcase while he did.

He and Shawn were going to his parent's house for Christmas. He and Shawn were going to his parent's house for Christmas. There was no Topanga, just him and Shawn. He was freaking out.

Cory pulled a sweater that he thought might, on second thought, be kind of effeminate out of his suitcase and threw it on the bed (his and Shawn's bed). Then he took out the long sleeve T-shirt under it. He scratched his beard and wondered if he should shave it off. He put the long sleeve T-shirt back into the suitcase.

"This is crazy," He said out loud to himself, "You do not have gay clothes!"

He dropped his hands into his face, then rubbed them over his face and massaged his temples, "Ice cream," he moaned, "Ice cream would be good."

He took the long sleeved T-shirt out of the suitcase again and went into the kitchen. The oven clock read 10:30. Shawn would be getting home soon. Cory put a scoop of ice cream into a bowl, added another, and curled up on the couch. He took a bite and began picking the brownie bits out of the ice cream. He liked to eat those last. There was a knock at the door.

"It's open!" He took another bite of ice cream.

"Hey, Cory."

Topanga stood in his door way in a knee length black pea coat. She'd cut her hair short, and now it fell to just below her ears in a dirty blond bob. She held two presents with a big red bows in her arms.

"Hey," he responded, frozen to the couch, his spoon still in his mouth.

"Can I come in?" she asked.

"Hey," he repeated, too shocked to produce a new thought.

It had been almost complete radio silence between him and Topanga since she'd moved out a month ago. He was terrified of talking to her in case she could tell, even via phone, that all of her suspicions about Shawn were true and he assumed that she hated him too much to deal with him. The extent of their interaction was limited to occasional and very formal emails sent to him about divorce proceedings. Cory had been petrified that his wife, who spent her days surrounded by high powered lawyer types, would find a way to wring him out of everything he was worth, little though that was. Topanga couldn't figure out how to tell him that she still loved him too much to try and hurt him that way. She wanted out of the marriage as quickly as possible and with as little mess as she could manage.

"I'll take that as a yes," Topanga stepped inside.

"Yes," The spoon fell out of his mouth, "Yes- Sorry, yes- Come in," he set his bowl down on the coffee table and glanced nervously at the clock, "Wow. Look at you. You look different. Good!" Cory spluttered, "You look good. With the hair. Short hair." He coughed, "What are you….what are you doing here, Topanga?"

She raised the box in her arms, "Your phone is off, Shawn didn't answer his. I knew you'd still be up. I came by with the presents I got for your parents. I thought you could bring them to your house when you go."

"Oh, yeah, sure," Cory said taking the boxes from her and setting them under the little plastic tree that he and Shawn had put up, "What did you get them?"

"I'm not going to tell you," Topanga gave him a strained smile, "You know you can't keep a secret."

Cory choked.

"Cory!"

"No, I'm okay," Cory massaged his throat, "I'm okay, chocolate chip, I'm okay."

"Uh-huh," Topanga nodded, "Well, that was it. I should probably go."

"Oh… no you don't… need to," Cory stuttered, "Um… How have you been?"

"Fine," Topanga said, sticking her hands in her pockets, "You?"

"Good!" Cory realized that he probably shouldn't sound so cheerful in this situation, "Ahem. I've been good."

Topanga tilted her head, "You're eating ice cream alone in your pajamas."

"Oh. Yeah. That," Cory scratched his neck, "Umm… Christmas with my parents is going to be fuck awkward this year. You know, I'm divorced, refusing to come home… and I have no idea what I'm doing with my life."

"Me too," Topanga nodded, "I haven't spent Christmas with my own parents in years and now I have to choose between them, or blow them off entirely and go to a roommate's Christmas with her family."

"I'm sorry." Cory said sincerely.

The conversation lulled uncomfortably. "And whose fault is that?" hung in the air like a big pink rhinoceros.

"You're refusing to go back to Philadelphia?" Topanga asked eventually, "But you've never liked New York what's- Oh," She pursed her lips, "Shawn."

"No," Cory scoffed, "Not Shawn. I like my job at the restaurant, I like this apartment, and New York's got to be the best place to figure out what you want to do right?" Cory shrugged, "How about you? How's the internship?"

"I quit," Topanga told him, "I hated it and I quit."

"You quit?"

"Yep. Walked out a couple weeks ago, got a job in the admissions office at school, making just enough money to buy my own groceries so I'm not eating my friends out of house and home," Topanga laughed mirthlessly, "And I'm going to apply for dorm housing for the next semester."

"You quit the internship you made me move to New York for?" Cory demanded.

Topanga sighed, "It's actually kind of a relief you know? Being this normal college girl."

"Oh good! Cause it was only, you know, the job you made me move to New York for!" Cory growled.

The door opened and Shawn walked in, with a small paper bag in one hand, "Hey Cor, I got you- Topanga?" Shawn stopped dead in the door way.

"Hello, Shawn," Topanga said levelly. Shawn cleared his throat and started clumsily trying to pull off his coat.

"Hey Topanga, Whatcha doin here?" He looked from Topanga to Cory, "What's she doing here?"

"I'm here dropping off presents for my former in-laws, Shawn."

"Oh. Good. That's… good," Shawn twittered, "How have you been?"

"She quit the internship we all moved to New York for," Cory declared indignantly.

"Oh," Shawn began edging into the living room, "Well, hey. Good for you."

Topanga agitatedly brushed her hair behind her ear, "You know what Cory- You have no right to be mad about this."

"You know I think I do. In fact, if we were still together, I might just be completely furious about this," Cory huffed.

"The hair cut's nice," Shawn tried to interrupt.

"Well, Cor, You just go ahead and do that," Topanga said, beginning to walk toward the door, "You be furious about me quitting and I'll continue to be furious about the divorce. Will that make us even?" She slammed the door behind her. Shawn winced at the sound.

"Wow," he said, sitting on the back of the couch next to Cory, "That was really really awkward," he wrapped his arm around him and settled his head onto Cory's shoulder, pulling him into a side-hug, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm-" The door opened again and Cory jumped away from Shawn with enough force to knock Shawn off balance. He toppled off of his perch on the back of the couch, and flopped

down onto the cushions, with his legs still hanging over the couch back. It was Topanga at the door again.

"Oh, and be careful with the present for your mom. It's fragile," she said. Once again, she slammed the door behind her.

"Jesus, Cory," Shawn exhaled as he spun his legs onto the couch with the rest of him.

"I'm sorry, I just-"

"I know. You don't want Topanga to find out," Shawn muttered, "I get it. I was letting you go when I heard the door open. You didn't need to knock me down."

"I didn't mean to, I'm sorry," Cory said again, moving onto the couch next to Shawn. He picked up his bowl of ice cream and offered it to him, "You can have some of my brownie bits."

"Nah. Too cold for ice cream," Shawn waved it away and Cory dove back into the bowl with his spoon, "Wait, you were eating ice cream alone in your pajamas before Topanga showed up? What's wrong?"

"I was trying to pack. Got a little freaked out," Cory answered staring into his bowl.

"You were trying to pack already? Cor, we're not leaving until the end of the week!"

"I know, I'm just anxious. This is going to be…"

"Weird. I know, Cor. But hey, they know, they're okay with it. So it'll be weird, but it'll be alright."

"Uh-huh," Cory agreed through another bite of ice cream. He sighed and looked up at Shawn, "You're right," He managed a weak smile and pulled his legs onto the couch before spreading them over Shawn's legs, "How was your day?" he asked quietly.

"Nothing too exciting," Shawn shrugged, beginning to pick at one of the small holes in the knee of Cory's pajama bottoms, which were really worn out and beginning to fray, "Made coffee, sold it to people. I brought you a couple of the cranberry scones you like for breakfast. Margot told me about her date. Several times, actually."

"With Ting?"

Margot had told Cory all about her crush on Ting when she, Agnes and Cory and Shawn had gone out for a beer the other night, and Cory, ever the gossip, was keen to keep up on events. Shawn relayed what Margot had told him and how excited she was.

"Hey, did you find out his real name?" Cory asked eagerly.

"You know, I didn't think to ask."

"Oh well. Good for Margot!" Cory exclaimed, "She's such a great girl, she deserves someone."

Shawn continued to fray the edges of one of the holes, "What did Topanga get your parents?"

"She wouldn't tell me. She says I can't keep a secret," Cory finished his ice cream and set the bowl on the coffee table. Shawn chuckled quietly.

"I cannot figure out what to get them," he admitted, "I mean, it has to be really, really good right? Totally perfect. I want them to like me."

"What are you talking about, they already love you."

"Yeah, I know, but things are completely different now," Shawn sighed, "I'm just nervous."

"Yeah, me too."

"I think I'm going to get Morgan this book that Margot was telling me about."

They sat in a tired sort of silence for a little while. Cory thinking about his suitcase again, Shawn about Topanga suddenly turning up.

"You know, I'm not entirely sure that Eric even knows about Topanga," Cory said eventually.

"When was the last time anyone talked to him?" Shawn inquired.

"I have no idea," Cory admitted, "More than a month. You know, I'm not sure if he's even coming home for Christmas. Hey, that tickles."

Shawn had slid a finger through one of the holes in Cory's pajamas and was brushing the hair on Cory's knees. Cory kicked a half-heartedly and Shawn smiled, but didn't stop. Cory grabbed Shawn's arm and slid his own legs off of Shawn's. He brought his face to Shawn's and kissed him. Shawn wrapped an arm around Cory's waist and pressed his body closer to Cory's. Cory's lips were cold and sweet from the ice cream.

Shawn had been tired when he'd gotten off of work, he'd been looking forward to getting into his pajamas right away and reading in bed with Cory for a little while before they fell asleep. But seeing Topanga in the apartment had gotten him riled up.

He leaned into Cory, gently pushing him back onto the couch. Shawn knew that it was silly, but ever since she'd left, Topanga had made him feel like his own claim on Cory was tenuous somehow. Topanga had been this unmovable presence in Cory's life for years. She'd been his first kiss, his first love, his wife, the girl he lost his virginity to. So much of Cory still belonged to Topanga- Shawn envied her that.

Shawn let all of his weight press into Cory's body, and slid his hands into Cory's hair. He pulled back from the kiss and whispered, "You wanna go to bed?"

Cory smiled, "Sure."

Topanga made Shawn feel like Cory could slip through his fingers the same way he'd slipped through hers.

Cory and Shawn walked hand in hand to their bedroom and fell, kissing, onto the bed. They lay on their sides, Cory running his fingers along the back of Shawn's neck.

Shawn had seen Cory and Topanga kiss against lockers and at doors for years. He'd watched them walk down hallways with their hands clasped between them. He wished, as Cory's hands, still a little cold, slid under his shirt, that Cory would hold his hand in public sometimes. Cory let his teeth drag gently over Shawn's bottom lip, and Shawn let out just the tiniest bit of a moan. Cory chuckled.

"I love when you do that," Shawn whispered.

"I love when you make that sound," Cory whispered back, kissing Shawn's chin, then his jaw, then down his neck, pulling Shawn's sweater down just enough to kiss his collarbone.

He shouldn't worry so much about Topanga, Shawn thought. Cory loved him. Cory had told his parents about him. That was a huge gift. But, as Shawn sank underneath Cory's weight, he remembered just how quickly Cory had jumped away from him when the door had opened again tonight. It had hurt.