This fic was inspired by "The Hands of Time," by Mrs A. Skywalker on this site. The song belongs to Cher. Most of the rest is mine... but certainly not the characters or places. Those belong the The Great Flanneled One. Bold print is lyrics, italics are thoughts (or emphasis if inside quotation marks), and italics and underlined is, naturally, the voice of the Force. Enjoy, and let me know what you think!
If I Could Turn Back Time
The sadness in his son's blue eyes—eyes almost the exact same color as his own had been, before…— broke Anakin's heart. Luke had had so much optimism, convinced that they could reach medical assistance before the elder Skywalker's ventilator or pacemaker could give out. He, however, knew better.
So now the mask was off, and he could actually study his son's face for the first time, without filters between them. Disappointing, though, that he would never get the chance to do so with his daughter. His daughter, who had been right in front of him for so many years, without him even suspecting.
As he felt himself begin to fade, Anakin Skywalker made one last, desperate plea to the one thing that had been present throughout his forty-five years of life.
Force… If only I could turn back time, do the right thing…
If I could turn back time,
If I could find a way,
I'd take back those words that hurt you,
And you'd stay.
Back, past Bespin, when he had so deeply hurt both of his children. Past Yavin and his discovery of the strong Force-sensitive pilot. Past Tarkin's wasteful destruction of his daughter's homeworld. Past all those years when he had hunted down his former comrades-in-arms. Past Mustafar and the man who had been the closest thing he'd ever had to a brother. Past the assault on the Temple and the slaughter of its inhabitants. Past the Chancellor's office and his disastrous choice there. Past being appointed to the Council on sufferance.
Past confiding in Palpatine, the Sith Lord who had manipulated him from the very beginning.
I don't know why I did the things I did,
I don't know why I said the things I said.
Pride's like a knife, it can cut deep inside.
Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes.
I didn't really mean to hurt you,
I didn't wanna see you go.
I know I made you cry, but baby…
You would change the past? Destroy the Sith when you first had the opportunity? the Force herself asked him.
Yes! Anakin replied emphatically. Even if it meant that he still lost Padmé, he would do it.
Then go, and realize your destiny the way it was meant to be.
If I could turn back time,
If I could find a way,
I'd take back those words that hurt you,
And you'd stay.
If I could reach the stars,
I'd give them all to you,
Then you'd love me, love me,
Like you used to do.
Everything began to run in reverse, gradually gathering speed. First the mask, then the fight with Luke, the Forest Moon, Bespin, Hoth…
If I could turn back time…
Screaming at Palpatine that he'd felt Padmé, going from unconscious numbness to pain that followed him for twenty-three years.
My world was shattered, I was torn apart,
Like someone took a knife and drove it deep in my heart.
You walked out that door, I swore I didn't care,
But I lost everything, darling, then and there.
The fight with Obi-Wan, yelling words he didn't truly mean. Padmé clutching her throat as he accused her of things she had never done.
Too strong to tell you I was sorry,
Too proud to tell you I was wrong.
I know that I was blind, and, ooh…
The Temple, younglings looking at him with trust in their eyes until he began to strike them down. Palpatine's office, Mace Windu, agonizing over how to thwart his visions.
If I could turn back time,
If I could find a way,
I'd take back those words that hurt you,
And you'd stay.
If I could reach the stars,
I'd give them all to you,
Then you'd love me, love me,
Like you used to do.
Guiding the Invisible Hand into a controlled crash landing. Fighting Grievous. Blades crossed at Dooku's throat…
Ooohh…
If I could turn back time…
If I could turn back time…
If I could turn back time…
Ooh, baby…
The reverse view of his life ground to a halt, and then time began to run forward at its normal speed.
This was the turning point, Anakin realized. A subtle flick with the Force brought Obi-Wan to full consciousness just seconds before the Chancellor began urging him to kill the (literally) disarmed Tyrannus. His former master remained as still as the debris around him, waiting for the younger Jedi's next move.
"Not a good enough apprentice for you, Sidious?" he asked, acid in his tone. Palpatine's startlement was telling, and he took two long steps backwards before uncrossing the blue and red blades. "Find another pawn, because you'll never enslave me."
The old man gaped at his presumption, and Anakin looked over his shoulder to find his best friend shedding duracrete as he stood.
"Then you, your precious Senator, and your child will all die!" Sith Lightning was thrown at him, and he raised his sapphire blade to intercept it just in time. Without hesitation, his left hand whipped Dooku's lightsaber into a flat spin.
It removed Palpatine's head and thirty centimeters of the chair's high back before dropping to the floor.
"Anakin, where the hell did that come from?" Obi-Wan was actually sort of endearing when he got confused like that…
"Long story, master," he replied, extinguishing his weapon and digging out his comlink. "Artoo, do you read me?" The droid returned a positive tweet. "Get to an escape pod and get clear. We'll find out own way off this thing." This time, the chirp was more of a nonchalant 'If you say so.' "Meet me either at the Temple or at home."
"Ah, pardon me," Dooku said, his voice a bit strained. "My personal shuttle is in a bay nearby."
"Can the security holos be accessed from there?" Obi-Wan asked.
Right, Anakin thought. The Council and the Senate will want proof.
"There will be duplicates there, yes," the crippled Sith replied. "I would be willing to offer a sworn statement, as well."
"Then let's get out of here and let the armada slag this heap," the younger Knight decided.
The shuttle—a fairly recent model, and well-equipped—was less than a minute and a half from the scene of battle. As he got it ready to launch, his former master checked the security database to be sure they had all the necessary evidence.
"It's all here," his friend announced.
"Then let's blow this joint." He meant it literally; before leaving the Hand's immediate vicinity, Anakin swung around to face the bridge and fired—first a pair of concussion missiles to bring down the control center's shields, then two proton torpedoes, which burst through the viewports before immolating those inside.
"Game over," he declared, getting a funny look from Obi-Wan. "Grievous was in there." The older man nodded his understanding.
A beep from his comlink informed him that Artoo was clear of the doomed ship. His fingers flew across the com station for a moment before he opened a broad channel.
"Open Circle, this is Skywalker. You are clear to destroy Invisible Hand at will."
I didn't really mean to hurt you,
I didn't wanna see you go.
I know I made you cry, but baby…
He didn't wait for permission, further orders, or traffic clearance before sending the shuttle streaking toward the Temple hangars. As it screamed into Coruscant's atmosphere, he could just barely see Dooku blanch.
"I hate flying with you," the copper-haired Jedi muttered. He simply laughed.
Temple Flight Control must have been warned; a large space had been cleared for them, and Master Windu was waiting nearby. His briefly shocked expression upon seeing Dooku was, well, entertaining.
"Where is the Chancellor?"
"He tried to zap me, and I defended myself," Anakin replied casually. The Korun master looked the other Jedi.
"It's true. I don't know how Anakin figured it out, but Palpatine was Sidious." When Windu continued to stare incredulously, Obi-wan added, "There are copies of the security holos on the shuttle. I believe they will provide sufficient evidence for both the Council and the Senate."
With a thoughtful frown, the other Master summoned several Knights to deal with Dooku and a technician for the shuttle. Anakin sensed a very strong aura of 'What has Skywalker done now?' from most of those present; Obi-Wan's brief glare said that he had better be ready to do some fast talking to get himself out of this one. Resignedly, he followed his former master to the quarters they'd shared little more than a year earlier.
"You had better have a very good explanation for me, padawan," the older man said as soon as the door closed. "The Council is going to want to know every single detail about your little family once they've seen that footage."
"You knew?!" Anakin asked, astonished.
"Please, Anakin, give me some credit. You are horrible at keeping secrets. Who do you think covered for you when you slipped away to see Senator Amidala? The part I don't know is precisely what you two are to each other." Obi-Wan looked exasperated, but not angry.
If I could turn back time,
If I could find a way,
I'd take back those words that hurt you,
And you'd stay.
If I could reach the stars,
I'd give them all to you,
Then you'd love me, love me,
Like you used to do.
"We're married." Upon hearing those two words, the older Jedi sank into his favorite chair with a sigh. "Three years now, almost. I didn't know she was pregnant, though." Thinking furiously, the Jedi Knight sat in his own seat.
"Just before I woke you, master, I had a… a vision, I suppose. I had the chance to take Dooku's life, or allow him to surrender. The vision showed what the rest of my life would have been like, had I chosen the former." His restless energy brought him out of the chair to pace the room. "In that potential future, Padmé died, the Order was wiped out, you and I had a terrible fight, and I thought my child died, too. And Palpatine orchestrated every moment."
"Oh, Anakin…" He could hear the sorrow in Obi-Wan's voice.
"It gets worse, master. He declared himself Emperor, and I—I was trapped in a life-support suit until the day I died. I did horrific things; most of my soul had died with Padmé. I didn't find out about my son until he was twenty—you'd taken it upon yourself to hide him from the Sith, though you both kept your surnames. Turned out that I'd been… acquainted with my daughter for half her life, but I didn't know she was mine until shortly before my son brought me back to the Light. I killed Palpatine to protect him and got zapped in the process. The suit didn't last long enough to get medical attention." He felt the tears run over his cheeks. "That's how I knew. In a few nanoseconds, I lived twenty-three years of his evil." He couldn't look at his former master, afraid of the disgust and rejection that he was sure would come.
"Anakin." Hands took his shoulders and made him look. "I know that, to you, it feels real, what you saw. But you've made the right choice, instead." Obi-Wan actually appeared to be proud of him. "Whatever decision the Council makes—and this is one I'll have to sit out—I'm with you. You're my best friend, my brother. If they choose to expel you, the ranks of The Lost will expand again." They a wry grin spread under his beard. "Besides, if your younglings are Force-sensitive, you'll need my help training them."
"'If?!' With little to no training, my son made a one-in-a-trillion shot.. on his first run, in his first flight of a snubfighter!" His friend—his brother—roared with laughter.
If I could turn back time (turn back time),
If I could find a way (find a way),
Then baby, maybe, maybe,
You'd stay!
"Tell me, young Skywalker," Master Stass Allie mused, "where did you learn the block and the throw you used at the end, there?" She looked rather peeved.
"You noticed that I froze for just a second or so before Sidious began to goad me?" Nods went around the Council chamber. "I received a rather detailed vision then, one that covered more than two decades. In it, the person I became had to learn those. Electrical shock on that magnitude would take out the life-support suit he wore, as well as all mobility. As for the second, the prosthetics he had been fitted with were not very high in quality, making him less agile, slower. Sometimes a thrown blade was the only way for him to catch an opponent."
For at least another hour and a half, he answered question after question. When it finally tapered off, glances went around the room before the venerable Master Yoda harrumphed.
"Wait, this decision will. When tested the child is, then must a choice be made." Anakin frowned. They had simply ignored his question about what would happen if the twins were strong in the Force. If Luke and Leia were deemed enough of a risk to put them in the Temple crèche immediately, it would happen over his dead body. Probably Padmé's, too.
"Anakin." Obi-Wan had caught up to him, and gently nudged him with a shoulder. "If they want to take the twins, they'll have to go through me, too." The blond responded with a weak smile, and his friend veered off toward his own quarters.
Before leaving the Temple, he stopped by 'his' quarters—rooms he'd barely used since he was knighted and was assigned to them—and pulled a wooden chest from one of the shelves. He'd made it himself, carving the entire thing from solid chunks of a tree native to Naboo. Inside the top two drawers was a fairly large collection of gems from all over the galaxy, nestled in the dark velvet he'd used to line the entire chest.
Obi-Wan didn't know that he had these. Most of them were raw, unfinished stones that he'd picked up on various missions before the war. The dozen or so cut and polished jewels had been given to him by people who had wanted to thank him during the battles that had consumed the last three years of his life. He'd never counted them, but he was sure that there were more than a hundred individual pieces, and no two were alike.
He'd known from the day he started collecting that he would give them to Padmé. That was why he'd chosen the wood to begin with. The intricate carvings on its front and sides depicted fauna and flora that he'd seen during his first trip to the planet.
Tucking the chest under one arm, he pulled his hood up to hide his 'famous' features before catching a public transport.
(Reach the stars) If I could reach the stars,
(All to you) I'd give them all to you…
"Ani! You're all right!" His wife was dressed simply for a change, and the gown didn't hide a thing. Once their initial kiss had to be broken—even a Jedi needed to breathe—he put his left hand on the swell of her stomach.
"Ours?" he asked, knowing her answer even before she nodded. "We're all going to be just fine." He could feel that the words were true.
"What happened up there today? There are rumors that the Chancellor is dead." Padmé hadn't even looked at the chest, her attention all on him.
"He wanted to tear us apart," Anakin told her quietly. "He was the Sith Lord behind everything. And he wanted me for his new apprentice."
"And I trusted him!" Even indignant, she was beautiful.
"As did I, until I had the vision that told me he was Sidious." Then he smiled at her tenderly. "We're having twins, a boy and a girl." Padmé glared.
"You looked! I wanted to be surprised!"
"No, I didn't, they were in the vision." He sighed. "It's as though I got twenty-three years downloaded into my head in a few nanoseconds. And it wasn't a good twenty-three years."
"But they won't happen now, right?" How did she always know just what to say in order to lift his spirits?
"Right." He hesitated. "The Council knows about us, because of the security holos we brought back as evidence. He directly threatened you and the babies. But they're withholding judgment until the twins have had a midi-chlorian count." Her brow wrinkled with a frown.
"I'm not letting them take away our children," Padmé declared. "They'd have to kill me, first."
"I told them you'd say that. And they'll have to go through me and Obi-Wan to get to you." The young Jedi smiled; that alone had made the entire interrogation worthwhile.
"Hmm, 'Uncle Obi-Wan.' Has a certain ring to it." He laughed, then put the chest on her knees where she couldn't possibly miss it. "Ani, what…?"
"I've been working on this ever since I started my Jedi training. For you." It was worth every bit of sweat, blood, and tears that he'd shed in the last thirteen years to see her face light up like that. Before long, he'd swept his wife into his arms and carted her and the chest into the bedroom.
The Sith were done for, his destiny fulfilled. From now on, he lived for himself and his family first and foremost.
Oh, spast. He was going to have to find that blasted Solo boy; there was no way he was letting his little princess marry a smuggler…
The End