Even in Death

AN: Well, hello and welcome to my first real FFVII fanfic. The other two oneshots don't count because they were just novelizations of scenes from Crisis Core. The basic idea for this fic is, first of all, it's Aerith/Zack. Haters can leave. Secondly, it's after she dies and basically a lot of fluff. Her death scene will be written out, and it will be the only part of the whole thing that's in first person point of view. Deal with it. One more important point; before you say 'That's not what the lifestream's like you n00b!!', I have read Maiden who Travels the Planet, and I DO NOT AGREE WITH IT. Sorry to those that do, this isn't the fic for you. Now, enjoy!

I knelt at the altar, head bent over my clasped hands. I breathed evenly in and out, keeping myself calm and under control. What I was doing was dangerous, highly so, but I had to go through with it. For my friends, for the Planet, everyone was counting on me.

But still, the fear was there. I hid it well, concentrating on my white materia. But in the back of my mind I worried obsessively about what happened when…

I refused to let myself think about that. I had to do this, for the planet, for Cloud, for every friend I'd made so far. I couldn't let them down. I wouldn't let them down. I could do this. It was the Planet's only hope. Holy, the only thing that could save the planet now. The ultimate white magic.

In another part of my mind, I was wondering if he was watching me, if he knew what I was doing, and why. Or did he even care? There had been naught but silence from him for years, and then the Planet whispered something I denied the moment I heard it. He's dead.

I was wondering, if he was watching me now, did he understand why I had to do this? He would probably tell me I was insane and that they could think of another way. The thought made me smile on the inside, though if you went deeper, you could probably hear tears. I was scared, yes, but I felt like I had to do this. I couldn't walk away from protecting the Planet.

Are you there? Can you hear me? I whispered in my head. I wanted him to be there. I didn't want to be all alone, but if I had told any of my friends, they would have stopped me. My only friend that might be with me now, I wasn't even sure was there.

Then I felt warm arms wrap around my shoulders from behind, like I had once held him, when he had been broken over his friend's death. I had been understanding then, and he was understanding now. I smiled inwardly to myself. The fears eased, and I felt like I could do this. I had to just concentrate on the white materia.

CLOUD! I suddenly heard him yell, and I looked up to see Cloud lowering the sword away from my head, which seemed to have been its original target. I gave him a tiny, reassuring smile.

Then pain ripped through my torso, blood splattered the ground and my mouth opened in a soundless cry of pain. I could still feel his arms around me, though he was clinging now, as though he were trying to hold me together. My body flopped forward limply; I couldn't move. My muscles twitched as the sword was pulled back out roughly, and my body fell…but I didn't. I stayed in his arms, though I clearly saw myself fall, and Cloud catch me. This was very…odd. But I didn't care. I turned my head a little to the side, resting it on his shoulder.

"Zack…"

The dark haired ex-SOLDIER held her gently. He never wanted to let her go. She was too precious to him. He'd always loved her, and since he'd died he'd wanted to tell her that so badly, tell her what really happened. He knew she probably thought he'd run off with some other girl. But that wasn't true, it could never be true. He was only ever going to want Aerith. That was why he had been watching over her, every day, since his death.

"I missed you so much," she muttered, turning in his arms so she could bury her face in his chest. Zack could faintly hear very quiet sobbing.

"I know. It's okay," he murmured soothingly. The scene around them had shivered and dissolved, shifting for a minute until it was a perfect replica of Aerith's church. Except, there was no hole in the roof, though the flowers still grew perfectly, just as they did in Aerith's real church.

For a while, Zack just rubbed circles on Aerith's back while she tried to pull herself together. After a while, she calmed down and wiped her eyes, not looking at him. It had been a long time since she'd just let herself cry.

"You okay?" Zack asked in concern, tilting his head slightly to try to see her face. She nodded, despite the fact she'd just had a mental breakdown. It had been a while since she'd been able to stop and just…let it out, so to speak. She'd just missed him so much...he had no idea how much she'd missed him.

"So...how've you been?" Aerith asked in the cheeriest voice she could manage. Zack tried not to, but then he started laughing at the irony of the question.

"Peachy!" he chuckled a little more, and Aerith couldn't help joining in. Zack's cheerfulness was contagious. "No, really, I'm great. In fact, everything just got a whole lot brighter all of the sudden..." he winked at her, and she giggled girlishly. It had always been this easy for them...when he hadn't been gone on missions. But she'd accepted the fact that he was a SOLDIER, and decided to accept the fact that with that job came leaving town a lot. But she remembered how she'd always feel that anxiety; what if he didn't come home, what if he found someone else, what if he got hurt...

Maybe she shouldn't have worried as much as she did that he had left her for someone else. It had been a big fear of hers, but maybe she should have listened to the Planet when it told her what had become of him. She should have listened. Maybe it wouldn't have been so hard. Or maybe it would have been worlds harder.

"So, what do dead people do in their spare time?" Aerith asked, looking extremely bright despite the macabre and blunt nature of her question.

"I'm glad you asked!" Zack said, suddenly sounding excited. "Cause I wanna show you something." He held out his hand to help her up, then led the way to the door. She followed him curiously, wondering why he was all of the sudden so excited.

"Wait a sec," he stopped, and she nearly ran into him. "Close your eyes."

"Huh?"

"I want it to be a surprise! It won't be if you see it coming!" Zack said in a 'Duh!' kind of voice.

"Oh, okay," Aerith did as he instructed, shutting her eyes tight and holding out her hand for him to lead her with.

She didn't know how long he'd been leading her when she finally heard him declare, "Tada!" Aerith opened her eyes, and let out a tiny gasp of surprise. All around, as far as she could see, flowers covered a vast field. The very same flowers that had grown in her church. Only there were thousands more of them.

"You like it?" Zack asked hopefully, his face filled with almost childlike expectancy. Like a puppy expecting praise.

"Of course I do! It's beautiful!" her mind was boggled at how so many flowers could grow in one place. "So this is what you did in your spare time?"

"Yep! It didn't take much before they were all growing like weeds! And I had to pick just the right spot. Look," as he told her to do so, he himself looked up. "I told you I'd take you to see the open sky. I was just a...little late, that's all." Aerith looked up, her eyes slightly anxious. The open sky had always frightened her, even while she was traveling with Cloud and the others. A few white clouds floated across the vast expanse of blue slowly, like cotton floating on water. She guessed...it wasn't so bad.

"It is beautiful," she muttered, almost to herself. That was one of his big promises to her, that he'd take her to see the real sky, a beautiful sky, not the polluted sky of Midgar.

"I knew you'd love it," Zack smiled, edging a little closer to her. She turned to grin at him.

"You know me too well."

"I would hope so," he grinned back at her, and she felt her heart flutter, even if it no longer beat. Then their eyes locked, and she felt like she was frozen. But she wouldn't move, even if she could. The moment was too perfect. Zack nervously took a step closer. Damn, why was this so hard? C'mon, Zack, just do it.

Neither of them quite knew how or who initiated, neither did they care. All that mattered was his lips were on hers and their arms wrapped around each other. The moment was perfect.

Aerith had thought that when someone died, that they couldn't feel the same as when they were alive; they could never be quite as happy or love as passionately as when they were alive. And now she knew she was wrong. Because her feelings for Zack were stronger than ever, and only growing. She never wanted to let him go again. And she would never have to.

Because now she knew, even in death, their love would go on.

A/N: Corniest ending line I have ever come up with...